"Hard CC'd for another thirty seconds."
Lin Li, who had gotten up to wash, was going through his daily routine in the bathroom.
Lin Li suddenly realized that every boy is actually a fragrant and soft little princess.
Because every morning, no matter how many layers of mattresses there are under the bed, when getting up, one still feels something hard underneath, which is uncomfortable, isn't this the Princess and the Pea?
Ahhhhh baby, so we are a bunch of little princesses ahhhh!!!
—Oh, right, those with fake sunshine (impotence) can't even be princesses, expelled from manhood.
Community park.
"Lin Li... this boxing routine you're doing, can you teach me?"
When Lin Li put away his boxing stance and rested in place, Zhou Youwei, who was beside him, hesitated for a bit before speaking somewhat embarrassedly.
Originally, after Lin Li indirectly rejected him last time, Zhou Youwei decided never to ask again.
Hmph, I don't even want this boxing routine.
However, Zhou Youwei discovered these past few days that Lin Li's boxing stance was becoming more and more exaggeratedly grandmaster-like.
Every morning in his line of sight, the trajectory of that body's swing was exceptionally coordinated. Although its presence wasn't strong, once you observed it carefully, it would sometimes make Zhou Youwei unconsciously hold his breath.
Even just doing his own Tai Chi on the side, there was an oppressive feeling like a firefly daring to compete with a nuclear power plant's xenon searchlight.
Terrifying, this is an aura that shouldn't appear on an eighteen-year-old boy at all.
Moreover, this evil little brat was so thin and weak, with terrible stamina, just two and a half months ago.
If someone told him Lin Li was cultivating immortality, Zhou Youwei felt he would believe it.
Then he had to learn it.
"Hmm?"
Lin Li, who was calculating how long it would take to finish the 'new' "Eight-Section Body Tempering Art" combined with the breathing method to see if he could complete the task, turned his head upon hearing this.
"This boxing routine you're doing, can you teach me?" Zhou Youwei gritted his teeth and repeated.
Seeing Lin Li raise an eyebrow slightly without responding immediately, Zhou Youwei suddenly felt his old face couldn't hold up, and somewhat regretfully and hastily tried to cover it up:
"Well, if the person who taught you told you not to pass it on, just pretend I didn't say anything. I'm just asking, interested, interested."
"Grandpa Zhou, the person who taught me didn't say I couldn't pass it on. It's fine to accept you as a disciple on his behalf, but he said this cultivation method requires being down-to-earth (jiao ta shi di) when practicing. I'm afraid you won't be able to handle it."
Lin Li came back to his senses, shook his head, and reminded him.
"No, absolutely not! No problem, what's there that I can't handle? I've been down-to-earth my whole life. This is not a requirement for me at all, it's my daily routine."
Hearing this, Zhou Youwei immediately puffed out his chest and patted his chest, which often got a stitch.
"Really? But I feel your bones aren't very tough. I'm afraid I'll step on you and break you." Lin Li sized up Zhou Youwei, then looked at the soles of his own shoes, looking somewhat troubled.
Zhou Youwei: "(；☉_☉)?"
Don't be noisy, let me barbecue.
What the fuck do you mean you're afraid of stepping on me and breaking me.
Wait.
"What kind of fucking stepping on a junior brother (jiao ta shi di) is this?" Zhou Youwei pointed at Lin Li, his expression like that Husky meme.
(Translator's Note: "Jiao ta shi di" (down-to-earth) sounds like "jiao ta shi di" (stepping on a junior brother)).
What kind of ghost sect is yours?
Using junior brothers as Japanese people?
(Translator's Note: Referring to stepping on people).
Zhou Youwei quickly reacted and spoke, realizing something was wrong: "And you kid don't step on people normally! Are you tricking this old man!"
"Because I didn't have a junior brother before." Lin Li answered instantly.
"Oh, oh, so that's how it is~~" Zhou Youwei smiled and pointed at Lin Li.
Lin Li also responded with a smile: .
Zhou Youwei got a stitch.
Lin Li rescued him.
Smooth and flowing, very skilled, done in one go. .
"Grandpa, if you want to learn, you can just follow me and try doing it."
After Zhou Youwei woke up, Lin Li smiled and said:
"I'm quite busy recently, I don't have time to teach you step by step, and I'm not qualified to be a teacher yet."
"But my movements are very slow now, you should be able to keep up. If you really can't remember, you can also record a video first and learn it later. Anyway, tutorials are all like this now."
Lin Li indeed didn't mind Zhou Youwei learning it.
As early as when he first started practicing the Eight-Section Body Tempering Art, Lin Li didn't mind Little Zhou secretly learning it, and he never hid his movements.
After all, putting aside the spirit stone chapter and the newly learned breathing method rhythm, the physical chapter of the Eight-Section Body Tempering Art is actually just a health-preserving exercise with very good body-tempering effects. It doesn't contain supernatural elements—at least none have appeared after practicing it consistently for a short period.
If Zhou Youwei hoped to achieve the same effect as himself, that was absolutely impossible.
Lin Li looked at the system, and no corresponding task popped up.
What a pity.
Without a task, it was impossible for him to specially make time to teach Little Zhou the cultivation method. He was already quite busy.
"Then, thank you." Zhou Youwei turned his head away, not making eye contact with Lin Li, and thanked him.
He was already quite satisfied.
Mainly because without permission, Zhou Youwei only dared to gesture Lin Li's movements when Lin Li wasn't around, and even had to worry in fear whether this guy was hiding in the bushes watching him right now.
Being able to try learning it directly in the future, Zhou Youwei was very satisfied and grateful for this result.
"I didn't do anything, what's there to thank me for. Anyway, just watch and learn. If you feel there's anything you're not doing right, and I'm downstairs in the morning, you can ask me."
"Stepping on a junior brother was a joke. The 'down-to-earth' our sect emphasizes is the same as what you understand, which is practicing until you're sweating profusely and make the ground wet, stepping on wet ground (jiao ta shi di)."
(Translator's Note: "Jiao ta shi di" (down-to-earth) sounds like "jiao ta shi di" (stepping on wet ground)).
Zhou Youwei couldn't bear it anymore and complained: "This is still different from the 'down-to-earth' I understand! What exactly is going on with your sect, do you have to use puns!"
"Same meaning. Grandpa, rest well, I've finished practicing, I'm leaving first."
"...Okay."
Looking at Lin Li's back, perhaps it was time to change his impression of Lin Li.
Going upstairs.
Because he came home late early this morning and had only slept for three hours so far, Lin Li took an hour and a half nap after eating breakfast.
Then he rode his bike to the Nansang Vehicle Management Office.
To take the Subject 1 exam.
There were quite a lot of people at the Vehicle Management Office, and the age span of the people present was quite large. The youngest were young people like Lin Li, probably around twenty, and the older ones were in their forties or fifties.
The young people were probably here to get their driver's licenses, while the middle-aged and elderly people were probably here to renew theirs.
Following the staff's guidance, Lin Li found the machine to get his exam seat number and queued up waiting to scan his face.
Middle-aged people in small places always easily chat with each other, even if they don't know each other at all.
That is to say, it was the Vehicle Management Office now, otherwise Lin Li felt that the few middle-aged men in front could lift their shirts at any time, revealing their big bellies, patting their bellies while talking, occasionally sucking their teeth and making a 'tsk' sound.
Now these few were chatting about how their driver's license points were deducted. After listening for a while, it was boring, nothing more than crossing solid lines and running red lights, not explosive at all.
Why aren't there any drunk driving and hitting people.
Bring some with criminal records, so I can keep an eye on these potential old criminals.
By the way, if you hit someone and send them flying so they can't be found, can you sue the pedestrian for hit-and-run and permanently revoke their driver's license.
After getting his number, he went to the designated exam room and computer, waiting for the exam to start.
No suspense.
They were all questions that could be answered at a glance. Lin Li finished the first ninety questions in just over two minutes, and the real-time data in the upper right corner showed they were all correct.
Even if he got all the rest wrong, he would still pass.
If it weren't for the delay in the computer switching questions, Lin Li felt he could finish the exam in one minute.
After clicking the last option, he submitted the paper.
Full marks.
When Lin Li got up and walked towards the invigilator's desk to sign and leave, everyone else, including the invigilator, was dumbfounded.
Especially when everyone confirmed that Lin Li wasn't experiencing a computer malfunction or feeling unwell, but had simply finished the exam.
No, bro?
I haven't even done ten questions, and you've already finished, and passed?
Holy shit.
The fastest legend of Nansang.
The fastest man in Xiling!
After receiving his passing certificate and getting his phone back, Lin Li took a picture and sent it to Yan Jian'an.
[Yan Jian'an: OK, awesome. After the cooling-off period, I'll book Subject 2 for you, probably the week after next. If you have time this week or next week, you can come practice driving. Just tell me half a day in advance, I can arrange it.]
[Lin Li: [Transfer 500]]
[Yan Jian'an: Sigh, how can I accept this.]
[Yan Jian'an has received your transfer]
[Yan Jian'an: As long as the money arrived, you can take back the sentiment.]
For the current Lin Li, any problem that could be solved with less than forty million in cash was not a problem.
Of course, if you really wanted forty million, then again—holy shit, why don't you go rob a bank.
...
After another morning of unremitting effort, the "Basic Sword Art" was finally translated and he could start practicing.
The first part Lin Li learned was sword flight.
Perhaps because of his good comprehension, he learned it quite quickly. After forming the sword seal, the possessed "Formless Sword" blade would generate a designated suction force, allowing Lin Li to stand on it without having to constantly worry about balance, but the speed was really nothing to compliment.
At this speed, he probably wouldn't even be able to see the butt of the old grandma grabbing half-price eggs at the end of the village.
But as the saying goes, you have to eat a meal bite by bite, and poop piece by piece. Take it slow, it's just the beginning now.
The future is promising.
For lunch, Lin Li ordered a small portion of braised chicken with rice, featuring an all-star lineup of frozen chicken, big dog pepper, Hajimi, and inspiration mushroom.
After eating and resting for a while, it was about time, so Lin Li went downstairs and rode his bike to Ding Sihan's house.
The community Ding Sihan lived in was right next to the Nansang Library. After registering, Lin Li rode his bike directly into the underground garage and parked it.
Then he returned to the entrance.
[Lin Li: I'm here, return to your positions quickly, don't make me wait too long @Chen Yuying @Ding Sihan.]
[Ding Sihan: What are you barking about, I arrived yesterday. I've waited so long, but have I rushed you once? Do you need to be so anxious? Speechless, repulsive.]
[Lin Li: ?]
[Lin Li: Ding Sihan, I really need to control you [Remote Control].]
[Bai Bufan: Ahhhhhhh—]
[Lin Li: ?]
[Ding Sihan: ?]
[Qu Wanqiu: ?]
[Chen Yuying: ?]
[Lin Li: Holy shit, I grabbed the wrong remote control! Sorry, my bad.]
[Lin Li: Forget it, since I'm already here [Remote Control] [Increase Intensity].]
[Bai Bufan: Ahhhhhhh!!!!]
[Ding Sihan: ?]
[Qu Wanqiu: ?]
[Chen Yuying: ?]
Lin Li, with the power of one dog, made everyone in the group chat panic.
[Ding Sihan: Why doesn't WeChat group chat have a mute function! How about we move to QQ, I can't stand these two psychos anymore!]
Ding Sihan acted quite fast, QQ already showed that he had been pulled into a group chat.
But Lin Li just sneered, how could he choose to fight on a disadvantaged battlefield.
[Lin Li: So how much longer for you two, otherwise I'm going to keep pressing the remote control.]
[Chen Yuying: I'm already on my way, I'll be there in a few minutes.]
[Ding Sihan: I'm still drying my hair, probably need another ten minutes or so. If you're tired of waiting at the community entrance, you can come sit at my house for a while.]
[Lin Li: Are there adults around?]
[Ding Sihan: Of course there are, otherwise how could I feel safe being alone in a room with a creature like you.]
[Lin Li: Then I'm not going (puts on pants).]
[Ding Sihan: Lin Li, are you crazy!!!]
[Qu Wanqiu: The stuff in the parentheses is so repulsive.]
[You have recalled a message.]
[Lin Li: Then I'm not going (puts on Taobao 199 this year's new American retro spring and autumn youth casual jeans).]
[Lin Li: @Qu Wanqiu, it's a 199 pair of pants, 199 oh, whose lifetime is this again, can you afford it? Hmm? Still repulsive? Hmm? Speak!]
Regarding Lin Li's speech, Qu Wanqiu summarized the following six points.
[Qu Wanqiu: ...]
Obviously, she was left speechless by his retort.
Now she probably wanted to mend their relationship, but didn't know how to start, anxious and desperate.
Himself, win!
Before Lin Li could continue wreaking havoc in the group chat, a car stopped at the community entrance.
The thin autumn sun spilled through the gap onto the slowly opening car door. When the beige ankle boots lightly touched the ground, Lin Li smelled the citrus scent drifting in the wind.
I'm fucking sniffing sniffing sniffing sniffing sniffing!
A milky white turtleneck sweater wrapped around a slender neck, and under a dark green plaid pleated skirt, two calves clad in black over-the-knee socks peeked out.
The ends of her long hair, stretched out in the sunlight, carried a hint of brownish-yellow, giving the impression that it had been dyed, but as the girl's angle with the light shifted, one would find it was just a bright ink color.
Today it didn't seem to be Chen Zhongping, nor the family driver, just a ride-hailing car, so there was no interaction. Chen Yuying trotted directly to Lin Li, and in the last three steps, she playfully spat out one word per step—
"Sorry, to, keep, you, waiting."
These words were broken down and spat out like a slow-motion shot, making every syllable sound very pleasant.
Lin Li put his hand in his pocket, and then under Chen Yuying's inquiring gaze, took out a pair of... disposable chopsticks.
Chen Yuying: "?"
Why did this thing appear?
"Why did you suddenly take out chopsticks?" Chen Yuying asked curiously.
"Because I saw my dish, time to eat, time to eat!"
Quickly tearing open the chopstick wrapper, holding one in each hand and waving them in a circle, Lin Li pointed them at Chen Yuying, rubbing them together to remove the splinters, and then continuously tapping them against each other.
If he dared to play with chopsticks like this when he was a kid, Lin Li would have been whipped into Top Esports by Wu Min.
But fortunately, he was an adult now, and Wu Min couldn't control him here.
Chen Yuying's face blushed slightly, and a faint but lingering sweetness gradually began to spread from her chest to her whole body.
"Hope you choke."
Rewarding Lin Li here.
But then, Chen Yuying remembered something, pinched her pleated skirt, and turned slightly left and right in a small circle.
The hem of the skirt was slightly lifted, revealing more porcelain-white, smooth thighs.
Slurp slurp.
Chen Yuying was just about to say the draft she had prepared in the car, but the next second she saw Lin Li reach out his chopsticks to pinch her thigh.
She really couldn't hold back, raised her hand and slapped Lin Li heavily—anyway, she felt she hit him very hard.
"What are you doing!"
"Eating, what else."
Actually, Lin Li had a secret he had never told Chen Yuying. He was actually Naruto Uzumaki's brother, Uzumaki Mouth.
So, quickly stuff this thigh sashimi into my mouth!
Hurry hurry hurry, I am King Jiji.
"Class Rep, wasn't your action of lifting your skirt just now equivalent to the head chef serving the dish and lifting the lid? I understand." So, Lin Li didn't care that his hand was slapped, he had already used the chopsticks, he must eat.
Lin Beihai's mental stamp was very firm.
This thigh, must be eaten! This is preserving a seed for human civilization.
Disposable Chopsticks, Forward Four!
Forward successful.
Unfortunately, Chen Yuying's thighs were really slippery. After the chopsticks touched, they slid along the curve, the tips knocked together, and picked up nothing.
Are these legs maintained with Dove chocolate normally.
Okay, I can not eat it, but Lin Li really wants to touch it.
"No it wasn't!"
Chen Yuying jumped back a step, moving away from Lin Li's eating range. After pulling up the hem of her skirt and turning slightly again, she smiled and spoke:
"I was letting you look at my skirt, Lin Li. This skirt of mine cost over eight hundred yuan, whose lifetime is this again? Hmm? Speak, speak~"
The last word 'speak', which should have been questioned loudly, was perhaps because Chen Yuying was not good at this tone, it had no power at all, and was even soft and weak.
But the slyness overflowing in her eyes made her look excessively cute.
Nuwa, come, turn on your mic, do you have the guts to say Earth Online is a fair game again? Hmm?
Of course, unfair is unfair, no nerfing allowed, keep buffing!
What our mechanics bro likes most are overpowered heroes.
Just love the beauty of these stats!
"What! It's actually over eight hundred! I didn't expect it to be my four lifetimes,"
The 199 (actually 149, Lin Li wanted to save face and over-reported by 50) jeans on his body paled in comparison.
It seemed Chen Yuying was here to help Little Jiujiu get back at him. Lin Li nodded and spoke flatteringly:
"Class Rep, I'm convinced, so I've decided to kneel and lick you."
"Of course, a real man stands tall between heaven and earth. If you don't want me to kneel, then I won't kneel."
Lin Li was all about being obedient.
"What if I don't want you to lick either?" Chen Yuying asked back.
"This time I'll pretend I didn't hear it. You're not allowed to say such things next time. I am the little emperor, I can do whatever I want, you can't control me."
Lin Li changed his face exceptionally quickly.
Those who criticize my faults to my face shall be whipped dozens of times and driven to the outer courtyard.
But if it's Yingbao, she won't be driven to the outer courtyard.
Driven to the inner courtyard.
As for the number of whips... sorry, I have sinned.
"Then neither is allowed." Chen Yuying took another half step back, shook her head and smiled, sighing: "Lin Li, if you continue to develop perversely like this, one day you will break out of your cocoon and become... a dirty big moth."
"Shouldn't it be breaking out of the cocoon and becoming a butterfly? Don't randomly change fixed collocations, hey!"
"What butterfly are you talking about?" Before Lin Li could speak, Ding Sihan's puzzled voice came from behind.
"Ah, saying I'm a rebellious butterfly (ni die), a butterfly flying against the wind~" So Lin Li turned his head, started with zero frames, and showed off his singing voice.
(Translator's Note: "Ni die" sounds like "your dad").
Ding Sihan: "?"
A girl's blush is better than any sweet words.
Sad news!
149 jeans battle damage +1.
(End of Chapter)