(Translator's Note: "Minotaur" (NTR) is internet slang for cuckoldry).
"Lin Li, could you be any more shameless?"
After the flying kick, Ding Sihan covered her forehead horizontally with her hand, shaking her head and sighing, indicating she couldn't bear to look.
"Little Ding, do you know what the purpose of my hard work in this life is? It's to prevent others from saying that I, this guy, 'am nothing but handsome, just a vase'!
"Sigh, people like you will never understand me." Lin Li neatly and skillfully patted his pant legs, his voice sorrowful.
Ding Sihan: "..."
What the fuck do you mean by 'people like you'.
"Enough, enough! Lin Li, I know you're gay now, I'll pass it on to Yingbao." Ding Sihan's mouth twitched, and she said with a headache.
"Who's gay, that's slander!" Lin Li got angry.
"Aren't you narcissistic?"
Lin Li: "?"
"Eh? Wait!"
Lin Li was stunned, not knowing how to refute for a moment.
But as everyone knows, Lin Li is very good at drawing inferences.
If you can't refute it, then join it.
"Ding Sihan, now is not the time to pass this on to Yingbao. Let's go, we're going to the nearby elementary school right now. I found out that those narcissistic elementary school students are all pedophiles. Shoot them! They must be shot! Despicable guys!"
Because Lin Li hated pedophilia the most in his life, he was exceptionally serious at this moment.
Fume-shrooms are fetishes that can be accepted by the world, but pedophilia is not!
Ding Sihan: "..."
"According to your logic, being narcissistic after self-harm, isn't that Stockholm syndrome."
As the end of the exam approached, more and more people handed in their papers. Bai Bufan, who had just slowly come up from downstairs, heard this conversation and joined in with a smile.
"Bai Bufan, you're going home this week, right?" Hearing Bai Bufan's voice, Ding Sihan didn't pick up on his words, but looked at him to confirm.
"Yes, my dad is probably already waiting for me outside the school. I'm really not staying at school this week. If there are any activities, you guys go play." Bai Bufan nodded.
He had mentioned it before.
"But this week's activity is me giving everyone ten million in cash." Lin Li spoke up at this time.
"Then I'll tell my dad to get lost right now!" Bai Bufan answered at the speed of light, his words serious, "If I can earn ten million, it's really uncertain who will be the dad in this family!"
"Remember, my dad's surname is also Bai, he can also be the Bai who takes my surname!"
These words really showed Lin Li some filial piety.
I'll really give Bai Bufan ten million worth of gold another day, I really want to see this scene.
"Alright then." Ding Sihan didn't join in the joke between the two, nodded, and looked back at Lin Li: "Then Lin Li, we'll confirm the specific plan in the group chat later?"
"Sure."
Nodding, Ding Sihan walked towards the classroom.
"Bufan, how did you do on the exam."
With only the two of them left, Lin Li moved a little closer to Bai Bufan's butt, asked verbally, preparing to make a feint to the east and attack the west:
"The last three multiple-choice questions are BCC, did you get them right."
"Heh," Bai Bufan smiled very helplessly, completely too lazy to look at the test paper to check this answer, just sighed melancholically:
"I found that exams are no different from surgery. Anyway, after failing, I can only come out and say to my parents, 'Family of the patient, I've done my best'."
Then Bai Bufan's expression suddenly changed, he touched his trouser pocket, and ran downstairs.
"What's wrong?" Lin Li, whose attack failed, frowned.
"I fucking left the scalpel in the patient's stomach, I'm going to get it!" Bai Bufan said while running.
Lin Li: "..."
I don't know if Lu Xun studying medicine could save the country, but Bai Bufan studying medicine definitely can't save it.
But if he studies medicine abroad, maybe he can, saving the country indirectly is also saving the country.
...
The bell signaling the end of the exam rang. Chen Yuying, worthy of being a good and obedient student, had clearly finished writing and checking more than ten minutes ago, but she still continued to check, sitting until the last moment.
When Lin Li heard the bell and returned to the corridor in front of the classroom, the windows had already been opened.
Finally, he didn't have to just look at her through a small gap.
He couldn't go in yet. Lin Li and the other Class 4 students who had already handed in their papers waited in the corridor for the invigilator in the class to collect the papers and let them go.
Waiting.
The moment all the answer sheets were collected, Lin Li looked at Chen Yuying, adjusted his non-existent glasses, sneered, and pointed at her: "The last three multiple-choice questions, B, C, C!"
Chen Yuying looked down at the test paper, looked up and smiled and nodded: "I know."
"The last two multiple-choice questions BCD, AB."
"Mhm~"
"The five sub-questions of the last two major questions, 25 Newtons, 180 Joules, 5.2 meters per second, 2.8 meters per second, maximum spring compression 0.42m!"
"That's the answer." Chen Yuying was now like a straight man.
"Damn it, all correct. It seems we can't widen the gap in physics." Hearing that Chen Yuying had no objections, Lin Li shook his head regretfully.
"What a pity." Chen Yuying also smiled and nodded.
The boy was handsome, the girl was beautiful, the picture was quite lovely.
The two of them were indeed having fun.
But the other students in the corridor and in the classroom who hadn't gotten up yet really wanted to grass-feed Lin Li's horse.
(Translator's Note: "Cao si Lin Li de ma" sounds like "fuck Lin Li's mom to death").
"Fuck! Lin Li, are you an idiot!"
"Not a single one right? Your mom, Lin Li, don't force me to whip you at this beautiful moment after school!"
"Holy shit, holy shit, except for the major questions, I guessed them all right! Physics is indeed too simple."
"Ah!! What entered my ears! Don't come in! Don't come in from there! There~ there is dirty~"
"Class Rep, you... Lin Li, are you an idiot!"
Almost everyone, after hearing the two checking answers, subconsciously looked at their own test papers.
But, after seeing the answers they left on the test paper, few could laugh.
On the contrary, Zhou Baowei, this little glutton who probably ate a lot of dog shit today, was a bit like Fan Jin passing the imperial examination, making Chen Tianming, who got everything wrong, feel a nameless fire—not in his lower abdomen.
More people chose to turn red and insult Lin Li.
If this was just Lin Li's answer alone, it would be fine, but it happened to be the answer certified by Chen Yuying and Zhou Baowei.
The gold content of Chen Yuying and Lin Li goes without saying, and Zhou Baowei was also an examinee.
So it must be correct.
Wang Yuezhi looked at the BBC on his test paper and frowned in annoyance.
Got one wrong.
He was indeed a bit hesitant about this question, not remembering the details of the knowledge points clearly.
Annoying British Broadcasting Corporation, the British police really need to go in and manage it.
But it's okay, I'll give Lin Li three points.
The gap between me and Lin Li in the last exam was more than just these three points! The advantage is still mine!
As a pedestrian, I should yield three points anyway.
(Translator's Note: A pun on "yielding three points" (giving a three-point handicap) and "yielding three points" (a traffic safety slogan)).
After the invigilator finished organizing the answer sheets and confirmed nothing was missed, they signaled that the students inside and outside the classroom could freely enter and exit.
The examinees left the venue and returned to their own classes, while Lin Li, who had been gang-beaten, covered his butt, dragged his battered body, and moved his desk and chair back to the classroom.
Fighting is fighting, gang-beating is gang-beating, why do these beasts always like to pinch my butt in the chaos, who the fuck did they learn this from.
Damn Class 4 of Senior One, all gay, may the secular world accept heterosexuality.
Because Xue Jian was coming later to say a few things, Lin Li couldn't leave first either. After moving back to his seat, he had nothing to do for a while.
Looking up, Chen Yuying was restoring her own seat.
So Lin Li flipped open Chen Yuying's textbook that was placed on his desk.
So clean, there's actually nothing but notes.
You know, Lin Li and Bai Bufan's textbooks had suffered unknown ravages.
After learning how to spin a book on a fingertip, the edges and corners of the textbook would always be a bit dirty and old, and none of the character portraits in the book were human. They either grew beards or were supplemented with non-existent parts.
Confucius even wore black silk.
Occasionally, you could find a page where all the enclosed areas in the text were completely filled in with a black pen.
All option enclosed areas are zero, civil service exam candidates rejoice.
Sneakily looking up again, Lin Li took out the 2B pencil used for filling in the answer sheet, and secretly wrote some things on the edges and corners of the top.
Things like "Lin Li-sama dasiki", "Lin Li is so handsome", "Lin Li", and other such outrageous and creepy words, making Bai Bufan, who curiously leaned over to look, feel morning sickness.
Don't know whose child it is, hope it's Baowei's, Lin Li quite ships them.
#OlderBottom #SpeciesSegregation #Sadomasochism #HeavyTaste #PureLove
He wrote a little on every textbook, being annoying, feels good.
Unfortunately, before he could finish writing, he noticed from the corner of his eye that Chen Yuying was coming over.
With no other choice, he had to close the textbooks, stuff them into Chen Yuying's pile of books, then picked them up, stood up, bent down, lowered his head, and handed them towards Chen Yuying, who hadn't approached yet.
"Did you write anything in my textbooks?" Chen Yuying approached, took these textbooks into her arms, tilted her head and asked.
"I swear on Bai Bufan's happiness for the rest of his life, no." Lin Li shook his head firmly.
"Fuck, I refuse! He wrote! He wrote!" Bai Bufan originally wanted to play dead, but Lin Li didn't give him a chance, so he could only expose him.
Actually, when Lin Li was uncharacteristically writing honestly in the classroom without barking, Chen Yuying had already noticed. Now getting this answer she already knew, she just gave Lin Li a reproachful look, and returned to her seat holding her books.
Xue Jian arrived soon.
Damn it, so he tricked the students in to kill them.
He said he had something to say, but actually he was handing out test papers as homework. Calling test papers 'things', Old Jian Tou had a heavy accent.
After perfunctorily reminding them about safety, school was dismissed on the spot.
...
Evening.
[Ding Sihan: @Lin Li @Chen Yuying, ddd, I have a plan.]
When the message came in the "Three People and One Dog" group, Lin Li was fiercely stuffing his big translation into the small text of the sword art.
[Lin Li: @ing me first, is it a secret crush, hmm?]
[Ding Sihan: [Nansang County First People's Hospital Psychiatric Department Mini Program Registration Link]]
[Ding Sihan: Register yourself.]
[Chen Yuying: What plan?]
[Ding Sihan: Let's go play at the pet park!]
[Lin Li: Pet park? Do you two have pets at home?]
[Ding Sihan: I just keep a cat food.]
[Lin Li: ?]
[Lin Li: What do you mean you keep a cat food, what, do you enshrine cat food like an ancestor?]
[Ding Sihan: Hamster.]
[Lin Li: [Thumbs Up] That's very cat food, my bad, my bad.]
[Ding Sihan: Actually I really want to keep a cat or dog, but my parents are indifferent. Helping me feed the hamster while I'm at school is already their limit.]
[Chen Yuying: My family doesn't have one either.]
This is the case for boarding students. Since they only go home on weekends, keeping a pet basically just means enjoying the positive feedback brought by the process of keeping a pet. Most of the troublesome things, feeding, caring, and accompanying, need to be handled by the parents.
If the parents are indifferent to pets or don't have time, it's indeed a burden.
[Lin Li: Then none of us three have one, and Bufan went home again, how can we go to the pet park?]
[Bai Bufan: ?]
[Bai Bufan: What do you mean?]
[Ding Sihan: Can you join voice chat.]
[Bai Bufan: Yes.]
[Ding Sihan: Wasn't talking to you, go play somewhere else. [Bone] [Bone] [Bone]]
[Bai Bufan: ?]
"The one we're planning to go to is a pet-friendly park, you can buy a ticket and enter normally even without a pet." After Lin Li and Chen Yuying joined the voice chat, Ding Sihan said.
"Then the question is, what's the point of going to a pet park without a pet?" Lin Li asked.
"Aren't there other people's pets? We can play with other people's pets." Ding Sihan responded matter-of-factly.
"Fuck, genius!" Lin Li had to agree now.
"Originally thought about going to a cat cafe or dog cafe, but mainly the cats and dogs there are too worldly and realistic," Ding Sihan spoke, "I've been to animal cafes a few times, the cats and dogs inside will only interact with you if you have food in your hand."
"Once you don't have food, they will immediately change to the next target or ignore everyone and doze off."
"Using cat teasers and dog teasers, those worldly cats and dogs who have been in business for a long time are too lazy to pay attention, not particularly fun. I thought about it, a pet park can roughly be a substitute, what do you two say."
Ding Sihan shared her experience.
It can only be said that no industry can escape the existence of slacking off.
"I'm fine with anything." Lin Li nodded indifferently.
"I can too." Chen Yuying responded.
"I checked online tonight, there isn't one in Xiling, but there is one in the neighboring Jinshui Town. The area is okay, I've already sent the link to the group. It takes about half an hour by taxi. We'll probably go in the afternoon, and come back when we're tired of playing?"
"Sure, let's go." Lin Li agreed before even clicking the link to see the details.
To be honest, Lin Li was quite busy now. If he calculated it, his weekend could actually be fully scheduled.
But as he said before, Lin Li lives for himself, not for the system.
He wasn't really in the immortal cultivation world, where if he didn't work hard to cultivate, he would become an ant that could be killed at will. There wasn't that much pressure.
[Ding Sihan: [Link]]
[Lin Li: @Ding Sihan, a ticket for a person is only 18, but a ticket for a pet is 28~58!? Fuck, good thing Bai Bufan didn't come, he's a large dog, it would cost 58.]
[Ding Sihan: It really is.]
[Chen Yuying: [Little Bear Nodding].]
[Qu Wanqiu: Then we really saved money.]
[Bai Bufan: ?]
[Bai Bufan: Why are you ganging up on me again?]
[Bai Bufan: Aren't you guys on a voice call, why are you inexplicably starting to communicate with text?! And Qu Wanqiu, you're not even going, what are you agreeing with!]
"Then it's settled?" Ding Sihan finalized, "After we get there, we can go to the supermarket to buy some snacks and drinks. Even if there are no cats or dogs to play with, we'll just treat it as going to a normal park to play, sit for an afternoon, and if it's not fun, we'll change the plan."
"No problem."
"Then where shall we meet to take a taxi tomorrow?" Ding Sihan asked.
"My house, this way before we go to the park, you guys can also play a game of escape room, getting your money's worth." Lin Li suggested.
"Pervert." Chen Yuying spat softly. I don't know if it was because she was lying on her bed making the call, her voice was soft and greasy.
"What, Class Rep, it lagged just now, I didn't hear clearly, can you say it again?" Lin Li pressed the volume + button on his phone, while asking.
"Ying! Bao! Said! You're a pervert!!" Ding Sihan suddenly shouted super loudly.
"Ears!! Ahhh! My ears! Ahhh!!"
In an instant, only Lin Li rolling on the ground and his agonizing screams were left in the voice chat.
Of course, there was also the laughter of the two girls.
Finally, they compromised and set the meeting place downstairs at Ding Sihan's house, after which the voice chat disbanded.
Stopping the act of expanding the "Universe Ring", Lin Li took out the "Formation 5-3" and "Basic Sword Art", and continued the learning and translation work of the two.
Until nearly midnight.
Lin Li wouldn't go to the sad Laoyou Road again. Lin Li rode his bike to the East Lake District.
The East Lake District is the academic holy land of Xiling, because it has the most bar dances and love shakes in Xiling.
Also late at night, the situation here was very different from Laoyou Road.
Today was Friday night, the shops on both sides of the road were basically all open, and the various flashing neon lights were even more dazzling than the double-headed holy sword Lin Li threw away.
And even at midnight, there were still many men and women taking taxis or driving to this place, walking into bars or even discos.
Some of them could be seen to have drunk a lot of alcohol as soon as they got out of the car, probably having drunk elsewhere before and now coming to change venues.
Lin Li strolled back and forth on this street for a while, but didn't see any illegal or criminal acts.
After thinking about it, Lin Li walked towards the only disco in Xiling.
A small part of the reason was to see if going deep into the enemy camp could find an opportunity to complete the task, and most of the reason was that Lin Li was curious about this kind of place.
It wasn't strict, they didn't even look at Lin Li's ID card, making Lin Li feel that his eighteen years were in vain.
They just asked which booth Lin Li was at, and after hearing Lin Li say he was going to the bar, they nodded and didn't care.
In the long, narrow, and dark corridor, as Lin Li advanced, the sound of the music grew louder and louder, and occasionally he could feel the slight trembling of the walls and floor.
Lin Li pushed open the heavy soundproof curtain, and the deafening electronic sound waves wrapped in restless heat rushed towards his face, filled with the heavy smell of alcohol.
Squinting to adapt to the stroboscopic lasers, the light strips and spotlights on the ceiling were shooting randomly all over the place.
As the only disco in Xiling, it actually wasn't big, estimated to be around a hundred square meters.
Young men and women were basically gathered at the scattered tables without seats, everyone reaching out to the middle, playing phone-grabbing or fist-dancing games.
And those slightly older middle-aged people basically occupied the booth seats, accompanied by one or two women who looked at least much younger.
In front of the DJ booth, an empty space without seats, a crowd of people crowded there, either hugging or alone, shaking their heads to the music.
Someone once told Lin Li that the so-called disco dancing is just using your head to write the character "feces" (fen) in the air to the rhythm of the music. Looking at it now, it really seems a bit like it.
Lin Li frowned slightly.
With just a glance, he saw a table playing the mouth-passing ice cube game, and after a round, men and women stood alternately. The people at the table would also deliberately press the man's or woman's head during the pass, making them kiss.
So they just kissed?
And this was not an isolated case.
For example, suddenly a boy hugged two girls next to him, made a three gesture to the others at the table, indicating a group of three, and those who didn't form a group drank.
Various ambiguous and heady games filled his eyes.
It was consensual, and had nothing to do with him, Lin Li continued to scan for a while.
Lin Li looked at the booths, especially those where the women had already drunk too much.
As expected, he saw many men getting handsy with their female companions.
Perhaps it could be considered indecent assault, but should Lin Li really step forward to stop it?
Lin Li was afraid of becoming a clown, being scolded by both the man and the woman as an idiot meddling in other people's business.
As for drugging, fighting with beer bottles, etc., Lin Li didn't see any at all.
Lin Li wasn't Conan after all, encountering cases wherever he went.
[Want to come play at our booth for a while]
Perhaps standing for too long, he was noticed. A very trendy girl wearing fishnet stockings came to Lin Li and held up her phone, with these words written on it.
Lin Li waved his hand.
[First time here? Add WeChat, I'll take you to play later?] The girl typed again.
Lin Li waved his hand repeatedly.
The girl nodded, didn't pester him, and returned to the booth with more girls than boys, whispered in her companions' ears, and continued to lead everyone in playing games.
Strong crowd control ability, seems to be a promoter.
Finding nothing, Lin Li exited the soundproof curtain and walked out of the disco.
Feeling the sudden quiet environment and fresh air, Lin Li let out a long breath.
There were slogans like "Don't fight, lose and go to the hospital, win and go to jail" everywhere here. Bars and discos also had security guards, and the management was considered orderly. Troublemakers would be immediately kicked out, and everyone had a scale in their hearts. It was probably unrealistic to expect the wild villains Lin Li hoped for to appear.
The crowd here wouldn't disperse until three or four o'clock. Lin Li couldn't wait that long, at least not today.
So Lin Li temporarily gave up and rode his bike home.
But Lin Li's expression always felt off, feeling uncomfortable in his heart.
The scenes from just now kept flashing through his mind.
Neon lights and green wine, paper drunks and gold fans.
To be honest, although he was mentally prepared, seeing such a scene with his own eyes for the first time was still a bit shocking.
Seventeen that year, always feeling that pure love is invincible.
Fuck.
How exactly can one believe "I smoke, drink, go clubbing, and have tattoos, but I'm a good girl"?
Good your mom.
Admittedly, Lin Li didn't rule out the existence of good girls in the world who purely like the stress relief brought by drinking and shaking their heads at a disco, who go clubbing but keep themselves clean.
There definitely are.
But, finding a needle in a haystack is tiring enough, why go finding a needle in a shit-stack.
It's not appropriate to kill everyone with one stick, but it's convenient.
Lin Li parked his bike.
Still uncomfortable.
So he took out his phone.
[I patted "Chen Yuying's" wooden fish head, merit +1]
[Chen Yuying: What's wrong?]
[Lin Li: ? Class Rep, why haven't you slept yet? It's almost one o'clock.]
[Chen Yuying: Going to sleep soon, just saw the message, why haven't you slept yet either.]
[Lin Li: Just memorized ten thousand hell jokes, patted you to add some merit.]
[Chen Yuying patted "your" butt and asked if this melon is ripe]
Patting is sometimes accidentally triggered by adults, so Lin Li set it very normally.
[Chen Yuying: Then you should pat more, you use up your merit too fast.]
[Chen Yuying patted "Chen Yuying's" wooden fish head, merit +1]
[Lin Li: Received.]
[I patted "Chen Yuying's" wooden fish head, merit +1]
[I patted "Chen Yuying's" wooden fish head, merit +1]
[I patted...]
[Chen Yuying: You take your time patting, I'm going to sleep, good night, you go to sleep early too, see you today.]
[Lin Li: Okay, wan mian.]
[Chen Yuying: What does this mean?]
[Lin Li: It means good night without a woman (wan an mei nv).]
(Translator's Note: "Wan an" (good night) is written as 晚安. "An" (安) is composed of the radical 宀 (roof) and 女 (woman). So "wan mian" (晚宀) is "wan an" without the "woman").
[Chen Yuying patted "your" butt and asked if this melon is ripe]
[Chen Yuying: Then good night handsome.]
Putting the phone in his pocket, a smile on his lips, and pedaled his bicycle with all his might in the night.
The discomfort disappeared.
Driving the creaking wheels, rolling over the twinkling starlight, carrying a thumping heartbeat.
Eighteen this year, still feeling—
Pure love is invincible.
(End of Chapter)