“I’ll go first,” Tay said, raising his right hand and holding a shot glass in his left. “Never have I ever cheated on my significant other.”
At the end of his sentence, everyone looked at each other in panic. No one dared to pick up their glass.
“This game requires honesty,” Mew piped up. “Anyone who doesn’t admit the truth, I curse them to—”
“Be haunted by a ghost!” Kinn offered with a laugh.
“Such a light punishment? Fuck, I wanna curse them with erectile dysfunction!” Tay snapped, turning to stare at his boyfriend.
Time sighed. “I’ll drink. But it’s in the past, so don’t bring it up!” he said, pointing his finger at Tay and knocking back his shot. No one else dared to pick up theirs, so the game continued.
“My turn,” said Mew. We all looked at him in anticipation. “Never have I ever…had a boyfriend.” The whole table got anxious. Tankhun started to frown, like he wasn’t pleased with the subject. The people who ended up drinking were Tay, Time, and Kinn. I felt a twinge in my heart as I thought of Tawan… He really was Kinn’s ex-boyfriend, then.
“My turn.” Jom raised his hand. Tem and I looked away, knowing from his expression that we’d be targeted. “Never have I ever…slept with another man.”
Everyone started to fidget. I looked at Tem with a pale face, but he wasn’t looking any better. We both nodded at each other’s glasses, as if daring the other to go first.
“Haunted by a ghoooost…” Kinn piped up. I snuck a glance at him and saw that he had already finished his shot, same as Tay and Time. I straightened up and sat back casually, refusing to pick up my glass. I’d pretend I hadn’t heard it.
“Cursed with impotence!” Jom said with a cackle. I acted even more indifferent.
“Hey! The things you guys are saying are fucked up!” Tankhun complained, but now it was Pol’s turn. He pointed at himself, looking confused.
“We have to play?” the bodyguards hiding in the corner asked.
“Of course you have to play!” Tankhun insisted. “Don’t tell me you didn’t think you were playing this whole time.”
“Even if we were playing, there was nothing we could drink to,” Pol answered cautiously.
“Play!” Tankhun shouted.
“Yes, yes, never have I ever…” Pol stilled, thinking, before he continued, “crushed on anyone at this table.”
I closed my eyes and sighed before looking up to see Kinn going still for a moment and picking up his glass. I smiled, but I was torn about whether I should drink or not. The question wasn’t too explicit—should I drink? There was nothing to gain if I acted like I didn’t hear, but I didn’t want to get haunted.
I swiftly knocked back my shot. I knew everyone was staring at me, but I acted like nothing was wrong. Of course, Tay and Time had to drink, but why was Tem looking awkward? He leaned back in his chair like he’d made his peace with it. Did Tem have a crush on someone at this table? Who? Was it Kinn?
“I’ll continue from Pol,” Arm said. “Never have I ever slept with anyone at this table!”
I froze, my breath hitching. I turned to glare at Arm as he laughed hysterically. If I wasn’t wrong…I was the target of this game. Kinn let out a satisfied noise before taking a shot as well, but what shocked and drew everyone’s attention was Tankhun, who also took a shot without a care in the world.
“Wait, Khun! Y-you…with who? When? How?” Kinn stuttered out as the rest of the table sat in silent shock. I took the opportunity to drink my shot while everyone was distracted.
“I didn’t sleep with anyone! But with the stuff you guys are saying, I can’t drink at all. I’m dying to drink my vodka! I don’t fucking care!”
We all sighed in relief. I doubted anyone at the table would be fucked up enough in the head to sleep with Tankhun, anyway. Kinn turned away from Tankhun to look at me, smiling as his gaze slid down to my empty shot glass.
“Ah, it’s your turn, sir,” Pete said, sliding a glass in front of Tankhun.
“Yay! My turn. Never have I ever…eaten dog food,” Tankhun declared as he downed his shot. We all looked at him wearily, no one picking up their glasses. Who would be crazy enough to eat dog food? You’re insane, Tankhun!
“Let’s stop. The band is here,” Time said, exhausted. The entire table nodded in agreement. We finished off the leftover vodka and swayed to the music.
“I’m going out for a smoke,” I told Tem, who nodded in acknowledgment. I glanced at Kinn, but he wasn’t paying attention to me. He had his hands full trying to hold back a tipsy Tankhun from dancing and knocking over the bottles on the table.
I lit up my cigarette at my usual spot: the alley behind the bar, where I’d met Kinn for the first time. Thinking of that day made me want to laugh. How had I ended up here? I should’ve let those guys beat him to death so I didn’t have to feel all these confusing emotions. But if I could go back in time, I would probably make the same choice all over again. Although I was still resisting my feelings, I could at least admit that I…
I liked him. For real.
I exhaled, smoke trailing from my mouth as I leaned against the wall. I tried not to think. In my mind, there was no one else but Kinn. He had so much sway over my feelings—too much. He could make me feel so many things at once. I’d been so pissed off this afternoon, but my heart was utterly relieved tonight when he drank to ‘liking anyone at this table’ with his eyes staring into mine. It was probably biased of me to think he meant me and not anyone else.
It was hard to accept that I had fallen for another man, but what could I do? I didn’t want to lie to myself. Kinn was the only person who could send my heart into a frenzy every time I looked at him. He had slowly broken down my walls and infiltrated my heart. Before I knew it, he’d made himself at home in there, and I couldn’t get him to leave.