The truth was, she was having some difficulty focusing on class that day. Her mind kept going in circles around Joseph and her memories. She was frustrated with herself for hardly even hearing what her teachers said. But more than that, she couldn’t stop thinking about the exchange between Yuri and Joseph that morning.
“Your Highness, are you fully aware of what you did to her?”
She was sure Yuri had said that for her sake. But Joseph had smiled and answered him confidently. What had he meant by “I could say the same to you”?
Brigitte had caught a flash of tension in Yuri’s face, as if Joseph’s words had hurt him. She was too worried about it to focus on anything else.
Nival and Kira must have heard the rumors, but they didn’t ask her about it. Her classmates didn’t, either. She was grateful for their thoughtfulness, but she hated not being able to ignore them, too.
The day’s classes ended before she could gather herself. She decided to head to the library, though she didn’t have much hope of finding Yuri. Taking the stone path next to the library, she made her way to the neatly kept garden with the little gazebo. When she saw the back of a blue-haired figure sitting on the ivy-covered bench, she froze. She had met him there many times before…but for some reason, today she was a little surprised.
Somehow, I thought he wouldn’t come today…
She wondered if he was reading as usual. He had a book in his hands, but as she stood listening, she heard no sound of pages turning. Wondering why, she leaned forward. The leather sole of her shoe scraped noisily on the paving stone.
She panicked slightly, but he didn’t turn around. She was sure he must have heard the sound. Steeling her nerves, she walked around until she was standing in front of him.
“Sir Yuri, I…”
But the instant her eyes met his, she stopped talking. Perhaps it would be strange to try to explain what had happened that morning or give him an excuse.
After all, Yuri and I are no more than rivals…
He must have sensed her unspoken thoughts.
“Was that why you’ve been acting strange lately?” he asked.
“…Yes, but…”
“…You must be happy.”
“What?”
“You’ve always liked him, haven’t you?”
He sounded vaguely resentful. The rustle of a turning page in his book struck her as cold, and she stared down at him in a daze. She had told Yuri once that she used to care for Joseph, and he had listened to her story with quiet respect. He had given her the courtesy of listening to the trivial story of her life that she’d never shared with anyone. He had even said that Joseph was lucky to be loved by her. That was probably why he was congratulating her now. There was nothing strange about it.
But…
She didn’t like it. No—she hated it with a passion.
“I am n-not happy!”
“…No?”
“Not one bit! I mean, I…”
I like you.
She wanted to say that, but her mouth wouldn’t form the words for fear he would reject her. She heard a soft “Peep…” from near her shoulder. Peep’s voice was hoarse, like it sensed her emotions.
“Anything else? I’m leaving.”
He closed his book and stood, evidently having had enough. Turning his back on her, he made to walk off.
“…”
But after just a few steps, he stopped awkwardly—thanks to the hand pulling weakly on the hem of his shirt.
“…What do you want from me?” he snapped without turning around.
Brigitte’s mind was racing as she gripped his shirt with her right hand. What did she want from him? What did she want to do? She didn’t have a clear answer. She knew she was hassling him—but still…
“…I’m not happy. Not at all…so…”
“So?”
The corners of her eyes grew hot. She was struggling for breath like a runner after a sprint, and her tears would overflow the instant she forgot to blink them back. Still, she whispered in a weak and shaky voice, “So…please don’t push me away.”
She didn’t want him to leave her side. It took all she had just to tell him that much. She heard his breath catch.
“…All right.”
That was all he said, but he took the hand that was still gripping his shirt in his. Under her blouse, her heart pounded erratically. In the end, she couldn’t keep back her tears.
“I won’t,” he said.
“…”
“I won’t, so don’t cry.”
“…”
“When you go and start crying…I don’t know what to do.”
She sniffled. “…I’m not crying.”
“…Uh…”
He turned around to face her. At first, she didn’t know what he was doing, but slowly he touched the corner of her eye. She stood there in shock as he wiped her tears away, not caring at all that his bony fingers were getting wet.
“You are most definitely crying.”
“…!”
His face was almost touching hers. Heat radiated through her. Were they going to kiss? Their hands were still entwined.
I told him not to push me away, but this is a bit close…!!
“Admit it. You’re crying your heart out.”
“I…I admit it, so…!”
Her tears were the last thing on her mind by that point. She tried to pull her head back. Finally, apparently pleased with himself, he let go of her hand. She staggered back a step and squatted.
“What’s wrong, Brigitte? Are you all right?”
She didn’t have the energy left to answer him, but in her mind she growled back.
Obviously not, you cretin!!
For a while longer, the two of them kept talking—or at least trying to.