“Risa Nagoshiii!! I like you! Please go out with meeee!”
A second-year boy I didn’t know shouted, and the gym erupted in sound. Spotlights roamed over the audience as everyone cheered and whistled. At last, they settled on a spot at the very back of the crowd.
It was Nagoshi.
She smiled wryly as she stood in the light. Then, she raised both hands over her head and made an X with them.
“Awwww!” came the crowd’s disappointed reaction. The boy had been rejected.
“I guess Nagoshi’s still pretty popular, despite the rumors about her being a delinquent,” said Sousuke, sitting to my left.
“Yeah, because she’s cool,” I said.
He nodded. “Yeah, she is cool,” he murmured, a distant look in his eyes.
I glanced at him, then turned my attention back to the second-year boy on stage.
“I won’t give up yet!” he shouted before leaving the stage. He received a big round of applause from the audience.
The after-party had begun, and we were in the middle of an event where people walked up on stage and publicly asked out their crush. It was modeled after a popular bygone TV show called, “His and Her Heartfelt Shouts.” Technically, you could shout out anything you liked, but most people used it for love confessions. The event was responsible for several student couples, and the air was full of excitement. I soon found myself caught up in the festival mood.
The on-stage confessions went on for over thirty minutes, and then it was time for the school beauty pageant. This event was open to second- and third-year girls. According to the rules, boys were allowed too, but most of the time they just entered as a joke. Typically, the girl deemed “cutest” was chosen to represent each class, and after they had all appeared on stage and delivered speeches, the audience would vote for the winner.
All the competitors had dressed up in a style that matched their personality and done their hair and makeup. One student in the front row was acting as a photographer, shooting live footage and projecting it onto a large screen to one side of the stage, so we could all get a good look at the contestants.
Everyone looked great, but…
I glanced over to my right and stole a look at Ai, who was enjoying the show. We weren’t required to sit with our class at the after-party, so she’d come over to join us.
I could see her face clearly in the illumination from the stage. The light reflected in her eyes, and she looked radiant.
She’s so beautiful. She was cuter than any of the girls in the show. I couldn’t say something like that out loud, but I thought it.
Suddenly, she looked over at me and tipped her head to the side. “What?”
“Oh, nothing,” I said, embarrassed that she’d caught me looking at her.
The gym was too noisy to hear each other, so she bent close to my ear and asked, “What is it?”
My heart pounded as I leaned toward her to reply. “Um, I was just thinking you should compete in the beauty pageant next year.”
She pulled away and stared at me intently. She looked surprised. Then, she leaned close to my ear again.
“Does that mean…you think I’m cute?” The question was so direct, I had no choice but to nod.
“Yeah.”
She chuckled bashfully.
Then, with a mischievous glint in her eye, she pulled on Kaoru’s arm. Kaoru, sitting to her right, had been engrossed in the performances and now looked back and forth between Ai and me, confused.
“What?” she asked loudly, trying to make herself heard over the noise in the gym.
“If Kaoru and I end up in the same class next year, which one of us do you think will be chosen for the beauty pageant?” Ai asked me.
I wasn’t sure how to answer.
Ai smiled as Kaoru narrowed her eyes and glared at me.
Ai was very beautiful. And Kaoru…was incredibly cute. I’d seen how stylishly she dressed outside of school, too. Picking one or the other was way too difficult.
“I have no idea!” I said.
“Ah-ha-ha!” Ai laughed, and Kaoru looked away, clearly disappointed.
Suddenly, I felt someone slam a hand against my back. I turned to my left in surprise and saw that it was Sousuke.
Leaving his hand where it was, he leaned forward and said, “I’ll vote for you if we’re in the same class next year, Mizuno! No matter who else is running, I’ll definitely vote for you!”
Ai’s eyes widened, and she glanced around shyly before saying, “Thanks!”
Her expression made my heart speed up. I hadn’t seen her react to a direct compliment like that before. Wow, so that’s the expression she makes.
Sousuke was always straightforward and fun to talk to. I liked that about him. But if I tried to keep things casual with Ai, saying I wanted to build up our relationship slowly, maybe her heart would drift toward him.
Currently, I was able to stay calm in such situations because of how clearly Ai expressed her affection for me. But I was just taking advantage of that aspect of her personality.
I could tell that Sousuke, for his part, was serious about her.
I got the feeling I could stand to take my own relationships a little more seriously, too. That included Kaoru, of course.
“I’ll vote for Kaoru!” I said.
All three of them exclaimed, “What?!”
“I think you’re both equally attractive, so I’ll support whoever Sousuke doesn’t!” I said with a smile. “That way, the class votes will be evenly split, right?”
All sorts of emotions crossed Kaoru’s face. First, she smiled bashfully, then her eyes narrowed, and she exclaimed, “You’re so indecisive! That means you don’t care either way!”
“I want to support both of you!”
“That’s called being indecisive!”
Sousuke and Ai laughed.
It was true—I couldn’t decide. Because both of them were irreplaceable friends to me, and I was torn between them.
Should I rekindle my relationship with a girl I still loved from my past, or should I pursue a new relationship and let it evolve from friendship into romance? The possibilities swirled around me, each path still malleable and unfixed. Which should I choose?
I liked Ai. But I didn’t want us to start dating again just because we liked each other. Then, it would be the same as before. Since we’d been given a precious second chance, I wanted to communicate properly and build our relationship carefully, so we didn’t have any regrets.
And then, there was Kaoru. I cherished her friendship, and I knew that she was in love with me. I wasn’t sure if I could see her in that light, but now that I knew her feelings, I owed it to her to sincerely consider them. No matter what my conclusion was, I knew that if I dismissed her out of hand, I would regret it.
“Hey, Yuzuru. I bet next year’s school festival will be here before you know it,” Sousuke said, leaning in toward me.
I had a feeling I knew what he was trying to say.
“Yeah…,” I said with a firm nod.
Time was passing by every moment. I was sure to have countless conversations with irreplaceable people, and our relationships and feelings would change with each one. No one could stop that. I couldn’t keep standing still and pondering things forever.
“You can keep hesitating, but I’m gonna give it my all.”
“I know.”
Sousuke always seemed to know what I was thinking.
I hadn’t told him about Kaoru’s confession yet, but I was sure he’d noticed the changes in our relationship. And he knew that I was still attracted to Ai.
I cast a sidelong glance at him and saw him doing the same to me. He smirked.
I nudged him in the side and said, “I appreciate the advice, but shouldn’t we be focusing on our performance right now?”
“Yeah! It’s coming up soon.”
“Are you ready?”
“Not really, but I’ll do my best,” he said with a shrug.
I could tell he was determined. He didn’t seem the slightest bit nervous. His resolve was so strong he was able to completely hide his anxiety. Sousuke’s so cool.
As the beauty pageant got closer and closer to finishing, I felt myself gradually tensing up.