“You looked like you were in pain when you took out your pocket watch, and I thought you might have injured your hand or something. You have to be careful and take care of it if only for your future (female) partner’s sake.”
She looked stunned.
Then she opened her mouth to speak.
“Is your head okay?”
“Oh, I have a yuri IQ of 180.”
Rei remained expressionless as she opened her phone and punched in a number.
“Hello, 119? We have a medical emergency here,” she said.
“Please don’t call an ambulance. It isn’t my intention to confuse ER staff and interrupt the hospital scene.”
“Just kidding.”
She closed her phone, her face still devoid of any emotion.
“But Hiiro, to think you would joke about anything… I’m surprised that you would say something like that.”
“Never in my life have I insulted a yuri girl with a joke. As a dutiful Japanese citizen, I have never once failed to pay my taxes or protect the sanctity of yuri.”
“I should be on my way now, or I’ll be late.”
Rei grabbed the bandage from my hand and turned her back to me.
“Don’t you be late, either, Hiiro. Not after taking up my precious time.”
“Well you took away my precious oral moisture. Give it back.”
I pointed to the puddle of water at her feet with a grin, and she walked away. Then I got into the limousine—and the Sanjo family dinner ended without incident…as everyone in attendance ignored me completely.
It had been decided that Rei would inherit the Sanjo family name, and apparently, I, the eldest son, had only been invited for one reason.
It was a spectacular sight, seeing the lineup of older women dressed in kimonos like yakuza mobsters. They were so intimidating that you’d think they’d killed a person or two.
People were wearing forced smiles on their faces, trying to get on their good side, so I figured they had to be pretty important.
Rei was seated among the big shots, appearing to be completely at ease with her forced smile.
No one came to say hello to me, though.
And since no one was coming to me, I decided to go to them. My innate politeness struck critical as I greeted them, and they looked at me with frightened looks on their faces as I grinned and talked about a must-play visual novel about love blooming between nurses.
People from branch families didn’t seem to be a match with Rei from the head family, but they treated me less like I was some stone sitting on the road and more like I was an air polluter emitting carbon dioxide.
They were practically bad-mouthing me to my face—or right next to where I sat—so I fought back by blowing bubbles in my drink without a shred of decorum.
“Hiiro.”
The party was in full swing.
When I grew tired of my childish protest, an old lady whose arrogance and pomposity could erect an entire building in Roppongi began addressing me.
“You will enroll at Houjou Magic Academy next year.”
Houjou Magic Academy… That’s the school that would serve as the main setting for ESCO.
That was where the player character would meet the heroines.
Hiiro would enroll at the academy and meddle with the yuri girls, and eventually, he would die a cruel death. How sad.
“I’m not asking, by the way. You will attend. You were born into the Sanjo family, so you don’t have a say in the matter. The family has decided it’s time we did something about you.”
Incidentally, there are several endings in which the Sanjo family has Hiiro assassinated, much to the delight of the player base. This must be the guy who lazily spreads a picnic sheet under the stars of misfortune.
“Why Houjou Magic Academy?”
“Independence. I hear you’ve asked people from branch families for money on several occasions, pressing the matter in a way that should’ve registered as shameful, even for a brat like you. An idiot with more energy than he knows what to do with might as well attend a magic school and see if he can put that energy to good use.”
You’ve gotta be kidding me!
That’s because with all the money the Sanjos have donated to the school, you can always easily murder me whenever you want! Geez, you’re prepared! Go ahead! More! If I haven’t turned into Hiiro, that is!
“Well, good luck. We will support you.”
So as it turned out, the purpose of this dinner was to declare to me that the family was either going to bring me to heel or have me killed.
“And this is the support I get, huh…?”
Having safely returned home from dinner to the Sanjo family villa, I stared at the magical catalytic converter—or simply, magic device—on my bed.
It was seven AM, the morning after the Sanjo family dinner.
I had woken up at six, gone for a run, come back, taken a shower, and returned to my room.
A magic device, huh?
At a glance, it appeared to be a perfectly normal katana.
But upon closer inspection, I noticed that the sheath had several indentations in it, and each one seemed like it was meant to hold something. Straight and curved lines ran between the indentations like they were connecting them, creating a design like a crest.
I unsheathed the sword, and it was immediately apparent that this was no ordinary weapon.
The sword didn’t have a blade.
Secured tightly with subtle magic, the entry point was between the sheath and its sword guard. The curved grip had a trigger, and in the center of the sheath was a muzzle.
The reason for this mechanism was a bit…special, unique to ESCO’s method of activating magic.
First of all, magic can only be activated in this world through this magical device.
You can chant Fireball! without using your hands, but nothing will happen. All that’ll happen is you being called crazy for shouting nonsense in public.
Magic is activated by pulling the trigger of this magic device.
In addition to this device that resembles a sword, there are also walking sticks, crystal balls, bracelets, holy shrouds, and even unique hair ornaments. Still, they all have one thing in common: They all have a trigger that you pull to activate the magic.
Simply pulling the trigger won’t activate any magic, though. The concave portion of the sheath is called a slot, where you have to fit a console.
The magic that can be activated depends on the kind of console you put in this slot.
In addition, the effects and power of the magic will change if consoles are linked by the wires inscribed on the sheath.
This combination relates to the depth of ESCO combat, making me think the developers needlessly overcomplicated elements of the game that had nothing to do with girl-girl romance.
“Ugh! This console is mostly junk… It’s worse than the equipment the main character starts out with…and it needs to be used with another one for the buff to take effect… It’s useless as is…”
The magic device is undeniably first-class.
As you’d expect from the Sanjo family, they were so concerned with keeping up appearances that they even gave the black sheep of the family an incredible device like this.
Still, the console I had to use with it was garbage. Just about the only use it had would be as an educational tool for a three-year-old.
“This is no good. I’m way too short on consoles… I guess I’ll go check out the dungeon after I have a meal…since I have to beef up my combat skills before I start school, or who knows when the Sanjo family will catch me off guard…”
I was busy playing with the magic device when—
“……”
“Whoa!”
That was when I noticed a girl silently standing in the corner of the room.
Her hair was as white as snow, and the eyes that peeked out from between the strands of pure white hair were a deep crimson. She wore a tight-fitting black-and-white maid uniform, and the white headband added to her loveliness.
She must be one of the NPCs. I had never seen a character like her in the original game.
She was petite, and she gave a small tilt of the head as she stared at me.
“A meal, sir?”
“…Pardon me?”
She pointed with her thumb to the rear door.
“Your meal, sir.”
“Huh? Oh…um, okay…”
Turning on her heel, she spun around, looked back at me again, and said, “Idiot.”
“Huh? Hey, wait a minute!”
Stopping like it took tremendous effort, she turned toward me.
“Yes?”
“I’m your master. Your mentor. Why the harsh language? Is there a girl you’re crushing on?”
“Are you giving me a lecture or asking me about my love life?”
“Is there a girl you’re crushing on?”
“So that’s the part you care about most…”
The expressionless maid answered honestly, “I don’t have a girl that I like. As for the verbal abuse, it’s to get back at you for bad-mouthing a colleague of mine the other day. ‘Are you sorry now, you marginally attractive creature? Ha-ha, don’t think you’re too good to get fired, you rotten blonde! Your mother has an outie belly button! I hope you grow a hairy mole!’”
The other day…? It must have been before I was reincarnated as Hiiro.
That bastard went ahead and plucked a yuri flower before it had a chance to bloom. Hiiro truly is the scum of the earth.
“Okay. I’m the one to blame, no matter how you look at it. I’ll endure whatever you have to say to me. I only want you to do one thing… Find a girl that you can love. Promise this delightful heir that one thing.”
She tilted her head further to the side.
“…Who are you?”
“The delightful heir.”
“The scumbag Hiiro I know has never made a polite request a day in his life.”
“There’s a first time for everything. Imagine how shocked I was the first time I read Princess XX.”