“Have fun.”
“We only need stunts like that in the movies!”
I was thrown out of the car and crossed my arms—and pressed my trigger, drawing a meridian line with my index and middle fingers—as I soared low in the air.
“The heavens might be jealous seeing an all-girls picnic like that.”
The Porsche driver was stunned when she saw me coming straight at her, and her mouth hung open.
I laughed and extended two fingers.
“Mind if I join you?”
I focused the output on an invisible arrow, which shattered the windshield, and I performed a dynamic entry by jumping in, feet first.
The driver caught my flying kick in the face and sprayed a nosebleed all around her.
The bodyguard recognized this impolite intruder, pointed her magic device at me, and—slap!—I kicked it away.
“Huh?!?!”
“Oopsie-daisy.”
I pushed with my arms and jumped in, doing a half-turn and smashing the back of her face with the back of my left foot. It went clean into her jaw, and she fainted in the passenger seat.
“Who the hell are you?!”
The last remaining enemy pointed a gun at me as she held Rei, who was struggling in the back seat.
“Hee-hee-hee! Good question.”
I struck a pose in the cramped car and said in a throaty slur, “I am the Mysterious White Lily—”
“Die, pervert!” Pow! Pow!
“I guess I’ll have to do this!”
I ducked into the passenger seat to avoid the balls of fire that came at me.
The guard in the back seat leaned forward and thrust the muzzle of her gun at me. I simultaneously pointed the muzzle of my Masamune Kuki against her throat.
“Wanna have a duel like they do in Western movies?”
Cold sweat dripped down the guard’s forehead as she trembled.
“I’m a professional who once stayed glued to my computer and kept hitting F5 for a special giveaway on a yuri game. I’m confident that no one can beat me at how fast I am putting an item in my cart and completing my order. Incidentally, there’s no need for that now, since the latest yuri games never sell out, even if they come with special offers. So what are you going to do? Do you still want to compete with me after I’ve told you this—?”
“Die, pervert!” Pow! Pow!
“I figured you’d say that!!”
The Masamune Kuki bounced out of my hand as I narrowly avoided her shots. I immediately whacked the guard with the water arrow and the arrowhead I’d hurled.
She passed out from the blow, and I gave a thumbs-up to Rei, who was staring this way.
“Don’t worry, you’re safe now. I’ll take those restraints off you right away, so sit tight.”
She must have been terrified.
Tears streamed down her face as she looked at me, and—vroom, vroom, vroom!
The Porsche’s engine was still running, and its movement continued as the unconscious driver’s foot was still on the accelerator.
What lay ahead was a guardrail and, beyond it, a sheer cliff.
Alsuhariya appeared on top of Rei and clapped her hands in joy.
“What a wonderful situation. Not a single blemish in my direction. Okay, Hiiro, it’s time for the grand finale. In a few minutes, this car will become seaweed in the ocean. Now, take your princess into your arms and enjoy the highlight of this scene where you dash out of here with her.”
I chuckled.
“I don’t know how to tell you this, but—”
“What the heck? Don’t hold back now. The first phase of our plan worked great. We still have a few minutes to spare so we can toast each other to celebrate our superb work and shove it in the faces of these assailants.”
“Okay, I’ll be honest with you.”
I laughed and pointed to one of my legs, which was stuck in place by the seat belt.
“I can’t undo this.”
“Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, that’s a funny joke—huh?”
I yanked on the seat belt, but it showed no signs of being undone.
“H-hey, quit fooling around. If you die, then I die. This has got to be the stupidest way to go. Hurry up and tear that seat belt out of place.”
“The enhanced projection effects wore off a while back.”
I flashed her a smile and gave her a thumbs-up.
“The Masamune Kuki that was blown away a little while ago? It’s under the seat.”
“……”
Alsuhariya’s eyes rolled back as she looked at me with a straight face, and a laugh escaped her lips.
“Ha-ha… Ha-ha-ha… A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha…!”
“A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!! This thing’s broken! Man! Ha-ha-ha-ha! Gee, it feels good!!”
“This is no time to be laughing! Hurry up and do something, you foooooooool! Stop messing around, ape-head!!”
“He-he…he…! S-stop making me laugh… A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha…!!”
The cliff was getting closer and closer.
Panicked, I reached for the Masamune Kuki under my seat. The tips of my fingers brushed it, pushing it farther back, and my face contorted as I squealed.
“Aaah…!”
“I’m going to cry…”
“Ngh! Ngh, ngh, ngh!!”
Rei was lying on the back seat, writhing and frantically trying to tell me something with her gaze.
Her gaze. It was focused on a small sword-shaped magic device the guard had dropped, and she desperately pushed it out with the tip of her chin.
“This is no time to cry!!”
I put everything into reaching out from the passenger seat.
Rei and I held small swords in our hands, and with trembling fingertips, we stretched out our arms—and the tips of the blades touched.
“Got it!”
“Hurry! What the heck are you doing?! You have to get out of here!”
Using the unattributed mini-sword, I cut the seat belt that was tangled around my leg. Next, I hoisted the unconscious guard.
“Leave that piece of trash there! Do you think you can recycle humans?!”
“You never know who might be reborn as a yuri! You can’t recycle humans, but you can recycle the human heart! I can tell! I know these girls will eventually show me the best scenes I can imagine!”
Activate and enhance projection— I kicked the door down, wrapped the girls in the buffer I generated, and threw them into the nearby bushes with all my strength.
“May the girls marry each other and have a happy family in the future!!”
After tossing the three of them out, I stared at the cliff looming before me.
“You got your priorities wrong, you stupid ape! You should have rescued the highly useful Rei Sanjo instead of getting to those mooks and tossing them to safety! It’s too late to save Rei Sanjo now. Give it up!!”
“I don’t have to listen to a rotten demon who’s all talk and no action.”
I picked Rei up.
“Of course I’m not going to give up on her now and die with you.”
Rei opened her eyes wide and stared at me, stunned.
The car’s bumper plunged head-on into the guardrail and shattered it, and the pitch-black vehicle fell from the top of the cliff.
The Porsche began a free-fall and tossed the passengers out an open door. I focused my magic power with all my might and threw Rei over the cliff.
For a moment, her eyes met mine through my mask.
And—I began to fall.
“Oh, God, am I going to die with you again? All because of your dumb plan?”
“No, Hiiro, this is how things should be. Because, you see, this very spot is the second site in my plan,” Alsuhariya said, grinning. “We had a few accidents, but they’re acceptable so far. This time, we’re going to do it—”
Vroooooooooom!
“And now for our finale.”
The sound of an engine coming straight at me shook the air. A motorcycle came flying down the cliff, and an arm reached out to me.
“I’m here to pick you up!”
Wallachia Tsepesh grabbed my hand, tugged, and landed on the rock surface with her rear wheel.
The bike’s durability had been boosted with magic power, and it took the impact without falling apart. Wallachia went ahead and sped along the shoreline with me sitting behind her.