“That would be terrific, thank you!” Nagafuji trotted over to the side entrance while the lady in the smock stared at me. She caught Nagafuji by the sleeve of her T-shirt and whispered something to her. Nagafuji looked puzzled at first, but then she turned toward me. Her mouth opened in surprise, as if she’d only just remembered I was here. “Is she…one of the lady’s classmates?” “No, she’s not a friend of Hino’s. I just befriended her here by the gate.” “Pardon?” I hadn’t noticed when we’d become friends. What was this girl’s idea of friendship? “Excuse me, miss… What brings you here today?” “I, um…” I didn’t know how to explain it. Someone called Hino lived in that house, but I didn’t know them. I thought the whole family living there were the Hinos. But were they the Hinos I was looking for? Could I find out by talking to this lady? “There’s…somethin’ I wanted to ask Hino,” I said. Based on what the girl and the lady had said earlier, there was someone called Hino in that house who was a similar age to me, so saying I had come to see her should sound natural… I was being optimistic there. I was as out of place as an iceberg, and just because it’d melted a little on the outside, it didn’t any better. “I don’t think you’re her school friend?” “She can’t be. I know all of Hino’s friends!” “I’m sure you do.” The lady laughed, covering her mouth politely. “But they could become friends. Let’s give them the opportunity to meet.” “I’m not sure that’s a good reason. Well, I understand that this young lady is here as a guest.” The lady kept her sharp eyes on me, still holding the bucket. Nagafuji took a step back and tried to dash past her, but the lady grabbed her by the scruff of her neck and lifted her off the ground. “Wheeee! I’m flying!” “You’re too heavy for this.” The lady let go and Nagafuji dropped to the ground with a big, satisfied smile. “She does not seem like a wrongdoer, at least.” “Wrongdoer…?” What did wrongdoers look like? A few faces came to my mind; some grown-ups I’d met, and some classmates. To me, evil was denying me the right to just be. “I’m afraid I alone cannot make the decision to let you into the house, miss. But I see no problem with letting you wait here if you want?” Here, as in infront of the gate? I looked around. The deep green of the bamboo thicket was pleasant to look at. “Yes, that’s okay,” I replied. Then an idea popped into my head. “Is your ‘lady’ a high schooler?” “Yes, she is.” “Thought so… Okay, I’ll be waitin’ here, then.” The lady shot me a strange look. My question was weird—I knew that—but I had to confirm my suspicion. If Ms. Chiki had been visiting this house, she wouldn’t have missed that a high school girl lived here. That pervert. Anyway, the girl would remember Ms. Chiki in that case. That gave me some hope. The maid stared at me for a long time before finally cracking a little smile. “She has such a lonely, forlorn look in her eyes,” she said to Nagafuji. “Oh yeah?” “Miss, may I inspect your bag?” “Um… Sure…” Wealthy people had their staff carry out proper security checks on visitors? Wow. I didn’t really have much on me—I’d only brought my phone, wallet, and the ring. The inspection was over in a second. “Want to check my backpack, too?” asked Nagafuji. “No, that won’t be necessary.” I got the impression the lady couldn’t be bothered. From what I could see, she was completely comfortable with Nagafuji, even outright dismissive of her. Despite that, I owed it to Nagafuji that the lady hadn’t turned me away. If it turned out I’d been wrong and Ms. Chiki had never been to that house, I was going to die of shame. “She should be back before long. I’ll leave you here.” The maid went back through the side entrance, which was really fancy for a staff door. Passing through an imposing door like that was enough to put you in a formal mood, I felt. For the time being, I had to wait outside, though, so I moved to the side and crouched with my back to the straw fence. “Whew!” Nagafuji crouched down next to me heavily. “You’re not goin’ in?” Unlike me, she hadn’t been denied entry. “Nah. Hino’s not around anyway!” “Ah.” It looked like she was choosing to keep me company. We’d only known each other for five minutes, but she was acting like she was serious about us being friends. Not that there’s a specific amount of time it takes to become friends, like ten minutes minimum or something. The shade of the bamboo kept the summer heat at bay even at midday. I looked up. The tall bamboo was swaying in a gentle breeze. I thought of a green wind weaving through the thicket. “So you’ve got a question for Hino?” “Yeah… I think so…” “Before you talk to her, Detective Nagafuji shall solve the mystery!” She made a finger gun at me. What was she going to solve? “You are…Hino’s fishing friend!” “Sorry, wrong… Never gone fishin’ in my life.” “The plot thickens…” Nagafuji shook her head. I had no idea if she was just fooling around. When she was just sitting quietly next to me, she looked intelligent and composed, but maybe it was just the glasses. “So Hino goes fishin’?” “Yes, she’s really into it. That’s probably where she is today. It’s a big event when she actually reels something in, though.” “Oh… She a beginner?” “If only! No, it’s because most of the time she just sits there spacing out with the line in the water.” “What’s the point, then?” “Don’t ask me—she’s a little weird!” I hadn’t met Hino yet, but I thought Nagafuji was one to talk. Nagafuji started scribbling on the ground, scratching out a circle shape with her fingernail. The maid returned, carrying a tray this time. When I saw what was on it—two glasses of pale-brown barley tea and sweets—I started drooling. “Please have some tea.” “Um… Thank you…” For some reason, things had been like this ever since I’d first met Ms. Chiki. I’d been encountering a strange number of nice people. It had started with Ms. Chiki, then Hoshi, Hoshi’s mom, this nice maid, and…Nagafuji, too? “You’re welcome!” Nagafuji replied instead of the maid. The maid ignored her. She smiled at me and walked away. The tray looked expensive. Nagafuji picked up a glass as if she did this all the time. I timidly took the other. The chilled barley tea instantly cooled my hot hand. The coolness ran all the way from my fingertips to my shoulder, freeing me from the relentless heat. I felt lighter, like I’d been dehumidified. I sipped the tea, soaking up the ambience of the bamboo thicket. It felt nice to have a little taste of luxury. My fingers tingled with excitement. I felt that way often with Ms. Chiki, and whenever I told her that, she would happily stroke my hair. “Like I said before, I’m Nagafuji.” Nagafuji was hinting that she wanted to learn my name, too. “I got that. Um… I’m Umi…Mizuike.” “Umi Mizuike. Hmm…” Nagafuji stared thoughtfully into the distance. Still staring, she speared the dessert the maid had brought with the wooden fork provided. “This is really good.” “Oh yeah?” I couldn’t gauge how to talk to Nagafuji. She was right about the dessert, though—it was delicious. At first, I thought it was a regular yokan jelly, but when I bit into it, it had a filling inside. I scooped up a little with my finger and licked it. It tasted like sweet chestnuts. The light sweetness and the way it melted on my tongue were novel to me, but they also reminded me of Ms. Chiki—high-class, unostentatious refinement. “You look like you’re smaller than Hino, Umin.” “‘Umin’?!” “How old are you?” “…Seventeen.” I was thrown to hear the same nickname Ms. Chiki had used before. Maybe like Ms. Chiki, she wouldn’t keep it up, either, though. “Seventeen? Gosh, you’re older than me?” “I’m in high school; year two.” I waited to hear how old she was, but Nagafuji was wringing her hands. Something else was on her mind. “You’re older. What should I call you?” “…It’s not a big deal.” “Then…Zuimi?” “Umin” I could at least kind of understand. Where had she gotten that from? We finished the desserts and the tea and then sat there, breathing in the refreshing scent of the bamboo thicket. That sort of thing was probably good for mental health. Nagafuji sat quietly until she’d finished the tea. Then she got up and started walking around. She wasn’t admiring the scenery, just being impatient. She approached the gate a few times, like she was going in after all, but each time she gave up just as she reached it. It was like watching a cicada move around at random. I followed her with my eyes, not sure whether this new oddball friend was something to be happy about. “Hino’s coming back!” Nagafuji excitedly pointed to a small figure on the path with a fishing rod slung over her shoulder and a bucket hat. The girl saw her and started running toward us. I picked the tray up off the ground and went to stand next to Nagafuji. As the girl got closer, I saw she had tanned arms, wore her hair in two pigtails, and was about the same height as me. “Welcome home!” “Hi. Why didn’t you tell me you were coming? I would’ve waited.” “Because I just decided to! I think it’s important not to suppress spontaneous behavior.” “You do, don’t you? Must be easy when you have so much spare time on your hands.” I guess the fish weren’t biting—the girl’s blue bucket only had water in it. Or it really was like Nagafuji had said, and Hino’s “fishing” was just sitting by the water with the fishing rod. Hino shifted the fishing rod to the side and turned to me. “And…who’s this?” “You don’t know her?” “Never seen her before.” “My hypothesis!” Nagafuji slapped her forehead. Hino glanced sideways at her but didn’t ask what that was about. “Anyway… Hello, stranger.” “H-hello…” The girl was short, like me, but she had an aura of confidence. She was so small—funny coming from me, I know—but you felt her presence even when she wasn’t doing anything, just standing there. In that way, she was similar to Ms. Chiki. Maybe your sense of presence grew with wealth? “Her name’s Zuimi!” “What? Swimmy?” “I’m Umi Mizuike,” I replied. I suspected this girl was also younger than me. “She came to ask you something.” “What? Why? Who is she anyway?” “A new friend.” Nagafuji seemed to be doing the talking for me, which was actually helping. She’d taken her glasses off. Maybe she wore them just for fashion? “A friend, huh? Fine. Let’s go and talk inside.” Hino motioned with her chin for us to follow and started walking toward the side entrance with quick steps. I was thrown off by how she’d invited me in without any problems. “I hope it’s not weird to ask, but…you sure I can come in?” “If we talk out here in this heat, I’ll start hating you by association,” she said, flashing me a smile for the first time. “If you’re friends with Nagafuji, you’re welcome to join us.” “Um…” She was nothing if not easygoing. “Yep, we’re friends! Since about fifteen minutes ago, when I met her by the gate.” “Hah, so much for my trust… Eh, whatever. I saw someone even more suspicious earlier today. In comparison, she’s perfectly ordinary.” Hino gave a little laugh. “How so?” I asked. “They’d give you a run for your money. They were fishing dressed in a space suit.” “Hmm… Not sure I could rival that…” I cocked my head, lost. I had no idea what a space suit was. “You wait in my room, Nagafuji.” “Why?” “Because whatever she came to ask me probably has nothing to do with you.” “Well, how can you know?” “You’re really asking me to kick you now,” Hino said, planting her foot on Nagafuji’s butt. She didn’t kick her for real, but Nagafuji still ran in circles screaming in pretend terror. The two girls seemed like close friends. I was honestly envious. That was what my relationship with Ms. Chiki was missing, I thought. This sort of teasing, friendly back-and-forth. Everything past the gate belonged to a different world than mine. The ground was covered in pure-white gravel all the way to the sprawling residence. It looked like there was a private wood out back, but it was probably just a garden. I imagined my mom and me secretly living in that garden without anyone ever finding us out. If someone did glimpse her, they’d probably just assume she was a ghost. I followed the girls, intimidated by the grandness of the residence. It figured that trying to follow Ms. Chiki’s trail would take me to all sorts of ritzy places. That was her world. When I passed through the door to the main house, I smelled the woody scent of the pillars. The whole house had a distinctive smell. I took off my shoes and noticed they were visibly dirtier than all the others. I put them to the side, hoping they’d be less noticeable there. It hit me that I’d been wearing those shoes to all my meetups with Ms. Chiki, and I felt a wave of shame. Had she given me strange looks that I’d just missed? I’d have to buy new shoes before our next date. She might even compliment them. That was something I could look forward to. The maid from earlier appeared at the other end of the long hallway. “Welcome back,” she said to Hino, taking the bucket and fishing rod from her. “Thanks. I caught this burr on the way in. Can you take it away?” “As you wish.” “Hello, it’s me, the humble burr,” said Nagafuji with a bow. The middle-aged lady grabbed her by the scruff of her neck, like a cat, and dragged her off. It happened so quickly I didn’t get the chance to return the tray. Hino saw me standing there awkwardly and took the tray herself. “I’ll bring it to the kitchen. Meanwhile…why don’t you wait in that room over there?” “Okay.” I headed straight to the room Hino had pointed to. I wasn’t used to walking through people’s massive houses all on my own, so I was feeling very tense. What if someone suddenly talked to me? My heart was pounding in my chest… Compared to Hino’s house, Hoshi’s apartment did kind of feel like home. I carefully opened the door a crack and peered in. There was nobody in the room, and the air was pleasantly cool. I opened the door a little wider and slid inside. The house was in the traditional Japanese style, but the room had Western furniture. Plus, the lighting reminded me of the hotels I’d stayed at with Ms. Chiki. I tilted my head and inhaled, absorbing the sophisticated atmosphere. There wasn’t a hint of dust in the air. It felt good to be there. There was a table the color of castella cake, two armchairs, and a sofa. I couldn’t decide where to sit, but eventually I chose one of the armchairs. It was too big for me; the armrests were too far apart. I sat in it stiffly with my hands on my knees. I could have fit perfectly into a rectangle. I stared at a picture on the wall, which had that precious-work-of-art vibe, but I couldn’t tell what about it was good. I didn’t even know what it was supposed to represent. There were overlapping lines in different colors, sort of like a spiderweb. To me, it looked like doodles, but the people from this house would probably be mad at me if I’d told them that. The curtains were slightly parted, and the view out the window was onto a thick wood, like you’d see in the hills. Lots of cicadas must’ve been living there. I could hear their shrill buzzing from the room. I wondered if Ms. Chiki had sat in that room, too, listening to cicadas. Alone with my thoughts in that room, I started regretting the whole business. How could I justify nosing around after Ms. Chiki? Imagining what she’d do if she found out made my eyelids quiver. I was terrified she’d dump me. From my point of view, rejecting me made Ms. Chiki a bad person. How could I go on living if even Ms. Chiki was a bad person? I might be able to survive on what she’d given me, but I didn’t think I could ever be happy again. And despite all that, I had come here. The door opened wide. “Wow, you’re waiting patiently, sitting in a chair. Nagafuji could never do that.” “Guess not…” From the little I’d seen, I could already tell Nagafuji wasn’t one for sitting still. Hino, now without the fishing hat, sat cross-legged on the indigo sofa. “Okay, Umin.” “‘Umin’?!” “You want to ask me something? I have to say, you got me curious. What could someone I’ve never met before want to ask me?” “Well, it’s about…,” I began. I was impressed with myself for having the courage. Normally, I sucked at talking to people. And what was up with rich people and nicknames? Did I have “Umin” written on my forehead in invisible ink only they could read? “It’s about somethin’ that happened over a week ago…” I silently counted the days on my fingers, remembering it was just before summer vacation started. “I think it was ten days ago. Someone came to visit you here. I want to know who it was.” “Oh, people turn up at my house all the time. Like you.” She laughed. I got her point—if she’d let in even someone like me, she must have been getting lots of visitors of all sorts. “What’s this person’s name?” “I dunno. That’s what I came to ask you.” What if “Ms. Chiki” was Ms. Chiki’s real name…? No, of course not. “Hey, what? What are you, a private detective? Or a stalker?” Hino looked at me suspiciously. The only answer I could give her was one Ms. Chiki had given to me. Gifted to me. It was up to me if I wanted to reveal it or not. Whether that’d satisfy Hino was another matter. I held my head up so high my neck hurt, and I looked straight into Hino’s eyes. “I’m…I’m her girlfriend.” “Whoa…” Hino reacted as if a pebble had hit her on the forehead. She was silent for a moment. “Wait,” she eventually said, cocking her head. “You don’t know the name of your own girlfriend?” “She won’t tell me…” “Are you sure you have the right idea about your relationship…? Never mind. Who am I to preach? Okay, so no name. Can you describe her?” “She was wearin’ a kimono that day.” “Many of my guests do… Any other identifying characteristics?” “She’s very beautiful, and gentle, and…she’s got really big boobs?” I wasn’t sure whether to say that last thing, but the more info, the more likely Hino might recall seeing Ms. Chiki. Hino was nodding after each thing I said, but after those last words, she froze. “Huh? She’s beautiful, gentle, and big-breasted? Are you seriously describing your girlfriend to me?” “I am…,” I confirmed without thinking. Only then did it hit me how what I’d said must sound to a stranger, and I went pale. Meeting Ms. Chiki had turned my world on its head; my crazy love for her had made me lose my common sense. I tensed up under Hino’s curious gaze. “Hmm… Hmm…,” she muttered, clearly stunned. “Okay, if that’s what you say… Hmm… Hmmm… Eh, who am I to judge?” She brushed off her reservations surprisingly easily. Maybe she was more mature than she looked. Or she couldn’t be bothered to dwell on things. “So a very pretty girl, ten days ago… Hmm… Hmm? Hmm… Oh, I think I know who you mean. There was this one beautiful woman with really big boobs, yes.” “Really?” The house did look like somewhere Ms. Chiki might visit, so I was pretty positive I was on the right track, but when my guesswork was proven correct, my stomach tightened painfully. I was madly curious to hear more, but at the same time, the guilt was eating me alive. “I remember her well—she was weird. She came up to talk to me just before leaving, asked if I was a high schooler, and tried to hit on me.” “That’s…” That sounded 100 percent like Ms. Chiki. It had to be. It was scary to think there might be another pervert out there like her. “That’s definitely her.” “That was your girlfriend? She was really suspect. Too slick.” I didn’t like her saying bad things about Ms. Chiki, but it would’ve been a lie if I said I had never thought the same. “I could tell you about her, but…should I?” Hino crossed her arms, looking this way and that as she weighed the idea. “Look, I don’t know what right you have to ask me about your girlfriend, but if I don’t want to talk about something, I don’t.” “Fair enough…” Hino’s stance was reasonable; mine wasn’t. I was pretty sure what I was doing was wrong. “But…it’s killin’ me to be in a relationship with someone I don’t know anything about. I don’t even know her real name.” I felt like I was the only person on earth who didn’t know Ms. Chiki’s real name. Only I had been given a pseudonym to use for her. But why? This nagging question was what fueled my sneaky investigation. Hino had no reason to care about that, though. Still sitting cross-legged, she slouched so that she could rest her chin in her hand. She was tapping her fingers against her cheek rhythmically, watching me. Then she stopped. “Actually, I can’t remember her name. Hold on.” She jumped off the sofa and briskly walked out of the room. For all it looked like, she was going to tell me Ms. Chiki’s name. My heart was pounding in my chest. I told myself to wait patiently and focused on keeping my legs still, but I kept fidgeting in the chair, turning this way and that, darting my eyes back and forth. “Eep!” Out the window, I saw someone’s head periscope up. My first thought was that rich people seemed to keep pet humans in their gardens, but then I recognized the red-rimmed glasses. “It’s Nagafuji…” Our eyes met, but I was still startled and didn’t know how to react. We looked at each other silently for a few moments, and then Nagafuji’s head retreated out of view. “What was that about…?” Nagafuji was as unpredictable as my mom, just in a different way. Hino returned, scratching her sunburned skin. “I had a think about your request.” “Y-yeah…?” “You’ve come all this way, so I’ll tell you her name. You write it with chi for ‘earth’ and taira for ‘flat.’ Her family name is Chitaira.” “Chitaira…,” I repeated, wondering if Ms. Chiki had based her nickname on the first part of her surname. Unbelievably, I had managed to learn her real surname, and all it had taken was a little trip in the neighborhood. “Is that everything you wanted to know?” “Yeah… Thanks.” I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t regret it later, but I now knew Ms. Chiki’s real name. Chitaira. A little part of her, no bigger than her thumbnail, had taken definite shape. Why had it been such a quest just to get her surname, though? “All right, then… Come out, I know you’re there.” Hino walked over not to the door, but to the window, where Nagafuji’s head popped up like before. I’d seen her earlier, so I knew she was there, but how had Hino realized? Hino opened the window. I saw Nagafuji’s hands emerge from below, like the hands of a corpse from a grave. “Tch! You found me!” “You always go there to eavesdrop.” Hino laughed, batting Nagafuji’s hands back down. While I didn’t really know these girls, they seemed like the kind of friends who’d forgive each other anything. I’d like to get to that stage with Ms. Chiki someday, too. Hino closed the window, and a couple minutes later, Nagafuji walked in through the door like a normal person. She sat in the armchair nearest to Hino and took off her glasses. She handed them to Hino, who for some reason put them on. She looked at my hand through the lenses. “That must be important to you.” I followed her gaze to the marine-blue ring faintly gleaming on my finger. “It stands out from the rest of your outfit,” Hino added. “Guess it does…” The ring was probably too valuable for someone like me to wear it well. “I get the sense someone wanted you to have it more than you wanted it,” Nagafuji said mysteriously—just to sound cool, I guessed. “I got it as a gift. Supposedly cost five million yen.” “Really? I’d have guessed five thousand.” “And my estimate of its market price was five hundred million dollars!” “Get yourself new glasses before the next school term,” Hino replied. She gave the red glasses back to Nagafuji and got off the sofa. “Will you be going now?” she asked me. “I’ll see you off. Nagafuji, you come with us, too.” Hino prodded Nagafuji’s shoulder, but Nagafuji pushed her back onto the sofa with a “Gotcha!” “What’s this supposed to be?” “It’s just me, Nagafuji!” “I’ve had enough. Enome! Carry this creature, please. She refuses to walk.” The middle-aged lady in the maid smock came into the room at once and lifted Nagafuji off her feet. “Wheeee!” “You’ve grown so big, my girl,” the maid remarked with a wry smile. They must’ve had a long history together. Hino, Nagafuji, and the maid walked with me to the front door. I’d turned up uninvited, but they were surprisingly hospitable. “Get home safe, miss.” “Thank you. Um…and thank you for the tea and dessert.” I bowed my head low, and my hair flipped up, almost touching the lady’s face. I smoothed it back in a panic. A haircut was in order… But first, I’d have to ask Ms. Chiki what sort of hairstyle to go for. “Bye, then,” said Hino. “Safe travels!” Nagafuji chimed in. That wasn’t a good-bye I heard every day. So I left the house with all three of them seeing me off. They had been really nice to me. There were more nice people out there than I’d imagined, and more different kinds, too. Why was it that until recently, I’d only met nasty people? Was it my stupidity that attracted them, or how I always walked looking down at my feet? If how you lived decided who you met, I really should try adopting a more positive attitude. “Oh…” I looked at the part of the thicket where Nagafuji had suddenly appeared earlier, thinking it was kind of strange. “Meh.” Nagafuji was just a weird person doing weird things, I figured. I would probably never see her again anyway. I walked back through the bamboo thicket the way I’d come. Had I made any progress at all? When Ms. Chiki agreed to be my girlfriend I’d been over the moon, but she still wouldn’t talk about herself. I’d gone out to find out things on my own, but when I got back, I started feeling really guilty about it. I deflated, and I hated myself. My chest hurt with every breath. Funny how feelings rule your entire body when you can’t even see them. Why are humans so fragile? I was sitting on the futon with my arms around my knees when Hoshi returned after taking a shower. “Hey… Bad day?” she asked me. “A day like any day.” “Ah. Cool,” Hoshi said a little snappily. She sat down angrily and used her foot to switch the fan to rotating mode. For some time, the only sound in the room was the whirring of the fan. Hoshi was oozing even more depressive energy than me. Her wet hair amplified the impression that she had her own personal dark cloud raining on her. Her eyes were dark. That look in her eyes reminded me of something. Right—my own face, in the train station mirror the day I met Ms. Chiki. Hoshi suddenly looked up at me. “Tell me what’s wrong,” she insisted. That annoyed me a little at first, but she was probably trying to be nice. She was a good person, after all. Despite being so keen to get me talking, she quickly looked away from me, like she couldn’t bear to see me. I looked down at myself, wondering what that was about, what it was she’d seen that had put her off so much. My gaze fell on my chest. Ah. Her head was higher than mine, so Hoshi must’ve glimpsed my boobs down the neck of my T-shirt. That was why she’d looked away. The T-shirt was loose, gaping at the top. No wonder she’d gotten a peek at the goods. It was too late now, but I adjusted my T-shirt nonetheless. What should I do about this tension, though? Hoshi was acting embarrassed about seeing the top of my boobs even though she’d seen me fully naked before. Different situation, maybe. Ms. Chiki had once talked to me about something like that. She’d been very heated about it, but I’d been too sleepy to take much in. “Hoshi…” “Ididn’tseeanything.” She spoke so fast, the words came out garbled. Her earlobes were swelling, pink like pickled ginger. “You the horny type?” She jumped into the air as if someone had suddenly pushed the EJECT button. Then she plopped down in exactly the same position as before. “No,” she said through her teeth. “Really?” “I’m about as horny as the next person. No more, no less.” “So you’re average-horny.” Then she just liked my boobs a wholesome amount? Hoshi must’ve realized there was no hiding the truth. “What can I do? I like you, so you have an effect on me,” she grumbled. “I get it.” I had a thing for Ms. Chiki’s boobs. I loved them so much it was embarrassing. “…I like you,” Hoshi repeated softly, as if for confirmation. She seemed relieved. I had no idea why. The subject of breasts, to put it delicately, did get me going. I got to thinking about how Ms. Chiki enjoyed my breasts, too… No, enough about that. It was a rabbit hole I didn’t want to go down. It reminded me of that crazy night when Hoshi had stayed in the hotel with us. We’d come back by train together, and it was like we’d gone on a trip. I was dead tired on the ride back… Hold up. The name I’d seen on Hoshi’s screen when she got a message… It was Chitaira. Chitaira? But that was Ms. Chiki’s real family name. Back then it had meant nothing to me, but knowing what I did now… Why on earth would someone with the exact same name be messaging Hoshi when we were on the way back from the meetup with Ms. Chiki? “…No way,” I said under my breath. For better or for worse, Hoshi didn’t seem to catch that. She wrapped a bath towel around her wet hair and left the room, maybe feeling awkward after I’d caught her staring. I was glad she left because I had the burning desire to check something. Was that fate at work? After Hoshi left, I waited a few breaths before leaping over to her side of the room. She’d just showered, so any scents she’d had on her when she’d gotten home would be gone, but her bag might still have them on it. I sniffed it like a dog, my nose nearly touching the bag. The shock was like a punch to the face. That was the floral scent I loved most in the world. I jumped and backed away from the bag. I moved so fast that my brain was shaking, and my thinking was slow. I was grinding my teeth so much I was surprised they didn’t shatter. I’d unconsciously started making circles with my right thumb, like it was an outlet for my nervous energy. I wouldn’t have suspected that a fit of jealousy could be this powerful. It was affecting my vision, making the walls spin. My hearing, too; a loud thrum in my ears was drowning out all other sounds. Would discovering Ms. Chiki’s real name bring disaster? A chain of dominoes that I had knocked over with my desire to know more about my girlfriend? I had no proof, but Hoshi was a high schooler, and that perv Ms. Chiki was into high schoolers. Hoshi was quite cute, too, and Ms. Chiki seemed to like her. Add to that the fact Hoshi knew Ms. Chiki’s real name, and her bag smelled of Ms. Chiki-like perfume. Disturbing suspicions swirled inside me like a tornado, flinging me into a dark corner. I suddenly remembered finding Ms. Chiki and Hoshi talking without me in that hotel hallway. I’d managed to put down my suspicions then, but I couldn’t anymore. I sprawled out on the futon. “Ms. Chitaira…” I addressed my girlfriend by her real name for the first time, even though she wasn’t there to hear it. The only way Hoshi could’ve learned that name was directly from Ms. Chiki. Somehow, that upset and hurt me most of all. I lay on the futon, unable to get to sleep. Was that also an effect of lovesickness? I couldn’t sleep, but I was zoning out, losing sensation in my body, boiling in the unrelenting heat. It was driving me insane. It had to be a sickness of some sort. Hoshi knew Ms. Chiki’s real name. And she wouldn’t tell me. I guessed she didn’t have a reason to, but did she have a reason not to? Also, Ms. Chiki was messaging Hoshi on her phone. I’d only seen it once, but maybe they’d met lots of times since then. All those times Hoshi had said she was going out to see some friends, was she really meeting with Ms. Chiki? Once doubt had taken root in my heart, I stopped believing anything. Why had I trusted Hoshi to begin with? I’d forgotten what had made me feel like I could. I was beginning to hate her. It was a bad frame of mind to be in, but I couldn’t get out of it. It eventually got through to me that sitting in that room with my thoughts wasn’t going to change anything, so I decided to do something crazy again. “You doin’ anythin’ today?” “Yeah… I’ll be going out for a bit.” “Ah, okay… I wasn’t gonna suggest we do somethin’ together, was just askin’.” Our morning conversation was awkward. About five days since I’d made that shocking discovery, I started faking total indifference around Hoshi. When she left, I waited a bit to make sure she wouldn’t come back for anything she’d forgotten before getting ready to go out myself. “Mom, I’m goin’ out, too… Mom?” She wasn’t there, even though I could have sworn I’d heard her talking moments ago. She must’ve left right after Hoshi. I was as offbeat as my mom, but that didn’t mean I knew what was going on in her head. I’d noticed, though, that when I was just aimlessly walking through town, I’d run into Mom surprisingly often. Maybe we just happened to make the same choices at the forks in the road. In a way, we were alike. Hoshi’s mom was brushing her teeth at the bathroom sink. She poked her head out, the toothbrush sticking out from her mouth. “What are you up to, Umi?” “Just goin’ out.” “Oh, you too?” “Um. Yeah.” “Okay. I hope someone comes back before lunch.” “I can try to be back before then.” “Mm-kay,” Hoshi’s mom replied, toothpaste froth around her mouth. She went back to brushing. Hoshi’s mom was counting on me to come back early, but what if I went really far following Hoshi? Well…I’d think about it later. I left the apartment as quickly as I could so that I wouldn’t lose sight of Hoshi. I had zero experience following anyone in secret, but I’d probably be fine. Hoshi probably wasn’t experienced at being followed, either. There she was. I made sure to keep the same distance the whole time. She was too far to hear my footsteps, but I walked quietly just in case. It was easy to hide in the crowd on the main street, but then Hoshi turned into less busy alleys. At least she was walking fast without looking around, so I wasn’t too worried she’d spot me. Where was she going? It was like she was in a trance. She seemed to be heading to the train station. Meeting a friend in another town, maybe? No, she didn’t go in. She stopped in the shade next to a cram school noticeboard. She wiped sweat from her neck, looking up at the stairs leading toward the residential area. Apart from the morning rush hour, the train station was very quiet, without any staff milling around. It was even quieter during summer vacation. Some people left the station and went to stand under the roof of a small pavilion set up on the plaza. Hoshi was glancing at it every now and again. There wasn’t anywhere for me to hide, since it was just a single path connecting to the plaza. I had to stand pretty far away, with my back toward Hoshi and a hat on my head. I kept turning to check if she’d moved. There was no shade where I was, and the sun was burning the backs of my thighs. If Hoshi noticed me…I’d go over to her. Nothing weird about walking up to a friend you saw in town. Right? It was so hot and humid, it was like being in a sauna. My brain wasn’t working the way it should. I didn’t like summer. It was uncomfortably hot to be next to another warm body. The person who’d taught me that had become someone I couldn’t live without. How would I go on living? I wasn’t sure what it was that made me turn around. The sound of a train arriving at the station, a familiar presence nearby, or maybe a certain floral scent. It was under a cheerfully bright sky, as it can only be in summer, that I was betrayed. The person my roommate was waiting for had arrived. It was my girlfriend.
Chapter 17
33 min read