Chapter 23

1 After defeating Chomusuke’s stalker, Arnes, we collected our gold (a token of gratitude) from the caravan leader, who even made arrangements for us to stay at a very nice inn. “You gotta be kidding! A coddled child of the modern world, sleeping in a stable?! There’s no way!” I had been sleeping ever since I got to this town and was awakened by a shout from downstairs. Our dear caravan leader had gotten us a room on the far end of the second floor. There was another cry, one that carried all the way to my new abode. “I don’t want to sleep with the horses any more than you do! But we don’t have any money, which means we don’t have any choice!” The commotion seemed to be coming from someone—or a couple of people—who couldn’t stand the thought of sleeping in the stables. Some novice adventurers who had just gotten into town, perhaps.“This is so not what I imagined being an adventurer would be like! Adventurers are supposed to make scads of money, stay in the best rooms, and drink until they can’t see the next day!” “And telling me that accomplishes what? Nothing! We only have a thousand eris left from the money that old Eris follower gave us, okay? We’ll use it to get some dinner, and then we’re going to sleep!” “Damn it all! I didn’t come here to live like this!” With the argument still ringing in my ears, I went to visit Yunyun next door. Axel, the town where beginning adventurers gathered. If you were an adventurer, this was where you got your start. “Yunyun, are you up? I am, thanks to some noisy adventurers. Want to go eat something downstairs?” When I knocked on the door, I was greeted by Yunyun, who looked sleepy. “You didn’t have to force yourself to get up if you were still asleep.” “…No, I’ll go. I’m so rarely invited out to eat.” ………… That tugged at my heartstrings, but anyway, I led Yunyun downstairs. Most inns were set up the same way: rooms up top, cafeteria and tavern down below. We must have come during peak hours, because the tavern was a zoo as we found our seats and ordered the fried-frog platter, apparently Axel’s signature dish. As we devoured our meals, Yunyun and I consulted about what to do next. “All right. I know we have only just arrived after many travails, but when you find yourself in an unknown city, you cannot rest on your laurels. We must decide what we’re going to do tomorrow and thereafter.” “Right. I think for starters, we have to begin taking quests to support ourselves. And that means finding companions.” Finding companions. That suggested a visit to the town’s Adventurers Guild was in order. “Is that what you intend to do, Yunyun? Using Explosion consumes all my MP and leaves me immobilized, so I’ll need someone who can attend to me, but I think you should be able to accomplish a simple quest even solo.” “I don’t know. I get so nervous when I’m by myself and surrounded by monsters—and I actually want some friends to adventure with. Staying in the same inn together, sharing meals. Toasting one another at the end of a big quest… Huh. I left the village in such a rush, I didn’t really think about it, but this is starting to sound pretty nice…” Yunyun speared bits of fried frog with her fork and mumbled to herself. “I suppose that settles what we will do tomorrow, then. I hear there is a bulletin board at the Adventurers Guild for those looking for party members. We should give it a go. It would also be a good opportunity to ask how to go about undertaking quests.” I left Yunyun to her starry-eyed fantasies and decided to press the diners around me for information. After all, I had another reason for coming to this town. “Pardon me, but may I ask you a few questions?” “’Course, li’l lady—whatcha need? What brings you to a place like this at a time like now?” “Yeah, your mommy’s gonna be worried about you, kid. Better run on home.” I attempted to interrogate two older men at a nearby table but found myself being treated like a suckling babe. “I know I may not be the most physically impressive, but I am an adventurer. Look at this!” Annoyed by their condescension, I flashed my Adventurer’s Card at them. “G-gosh, gee, sorry about that! So what can I do ya fer?” “As I said, I just need to ask you a few questions. I’ve been told there’s a mage in this town who can use Explosion. Do you know anything about that?” ““Explosion?”” Both men looked perplexed. Didn’t they know the name of a spell when they heard one? “It is the ultimate offensive magic. I came to this town based on reports that there was a beautiful, large-chested wizard here who could use it…” “‘Beautiful’ and ‘large-chested,’ eh…? Aww, hey, I think she means the shopkeeper!” “The penniless proprietor! Yeah, sounds like her!” “‘The penniless proprietor’?” This was not the response I had expected. “She runs a shop full of magical items—locally famous place.” “A great wizard, used to be an adventurer herself.” A former adventurer and great wizard? Could she really be the one I was searching for? This “penniless proprietor” business bothered me, though. The woman I’d met had seemed so collected and capable. But maybe that didn’t mean she was a decent businesswoman? I asked them where this shop was and committed the location to memory. I could go find the woman anytime. But when I did, I wanted her to see how amazing I had grown up to be… “…Maybe I’ll wait until I have become a proper, self-sufficient adventurer.” The chance to finally meet her was within my grasp, but I found myself with a case of cold feet. 2 “Come now, Yunyun—let us go! Let us seize the day!” “F-fine, okay, I’m coming, but I don’t understand how you can be so fired up first thing in the morning.” Having finished our basic survey of the town, it was time to go off to the Guild. “I do not understand how you cannot be. Today is the day, the moment our illustrious and long-awaited careers as adventurers begin! The pulse-pounding battles with powerful enemies yet unknown! The monsters who will be blown away by my Explosion! I’m practically bursting just thinking about them! Of course I am fired up!” I violently waved my staff with excitement as we made our way through town. “Okay, okay! I get it—just keep your voice down!” Yunyun said, glancing around as if she was embarrassed. It was still too early for many people to be out on the streets. We arrived at the Adventurers Guild first thing in the morning to look for companions. On the other side of this door waited a gathering of would-be heroes. I stood before the entrance, breathing roughly out of my nostrils as I turned to Yunyun. “Are you ready? At a time like this, the first impression can make or break you. This is the Adventurers Guild, a wretched hive of scum and villainy—I’m certain they will have nothing but ridicule for two young, untried questers such as ourselves. When we open this door, we must proclaim ourselves with the utmost authority and drama! We cannot let them mock the Crimson Magic Clan!” “What?! W-we do?! W-we can’t! Let’s not—we’ll only draw attention to ourselves!” “That is exactly the point! Sometimes I cannot fathom you, Yunyun! Come now. Let us go in!” “Ohhhh… Please don’t let us get mixed up with anyone scary; please don’t let us get mixed up with anyone scary…” As I opened the door, I flung back my cape! “My name is Megumin! Greatest genius of the Crimson Magic Clan and wielder…of…” There was no one inside. “O-oh God, I’m so embarrassed…!!” Behind me, Yunyun held Chomusuke in her arms; she was beet red, and her shoulders were shaking. I felt my own face get a little bit hot. “Yes, I’m coming… Goodness, what brings you here so early?” So there wasn’t quite no one inside—a woman, older than us, appeared from another room. Probably a staff member. When I took a fresh look around, I discovered that not only were there no adventurers looking for work, but even the attached tavern was bereft of customers. I collected myself and went over to the woman, who had taken a seat at the counter. “H-hello. I’m Megumin, an Arch-wizard. I’m, ahem, new to the adventuring business, so I’m not quite sure what to do…” “Oh my, those eyes. You’re from the Crimson Magic Clan, aren’t you? I do seem to recall the Clan creates Adventurer’s Cards for everyone when they reach school age. So you already have a card, right? I’ll need to check it before you start adventuring, just to make sure you don’t have any criminal history or anything…” I was about to let the receptionist do just that when a thought occurred to me. “I’m sorry, but perhaps we could defer the card check a little while? Specifically, I’d like to wait until there are more adventurers here.” The woman gave me a quizzical look. “That’s fine, I guess…” I stepped away from the desk and sat at a nearby table. “Megumin, aren’t you going to have her look at your card? Are you sure you want me to go first?” “Fine by me. I wish to wait until there are more people here.” Yunyun looked dubious, but she handed her card to the receptionist. “Thank you. I’ll just have a look at—Oh! It’s just like you hear about the Crimson Magic Clan—Incredible! I’ve never seen someone with so much MP!” “Th-thank you…” I just sat there listening to them with a little smile on my face and waited for more people to arrive. 3 Other people slowly began filtering into the Guild until the place was alive with bar patrons. They were mainly adventurers looking for choice assignments and making plans for the day. I listened to the hum from the tavern and whispered to myself, “…Looks like it’s time.” I stood up, earning a look from Yunyun, who was sitting across from me at the table, eating a plate of pasta. “Why did you want to wait so long to have your card checked? You would’ve gotten through a lot quicker a few minutes ago, when there was nobody in line…” I told Yunyun (who understood nothing) that I would be right back, then worked my way toward the crowd of people around the front desk. There were, incidentally, unspoken rules for how one chose a receptionist at a moment like this. First preference went to the most beautiful receptionist lady. Such women were often important people of the Guild. Other times, they had surprising backstories. For example, they may have once been highly accomplished adventurers themselves. That was just common sense in this industry—or so we’d been taught in school anyway. “All right, next please… Oh, you’re the Crimson Magic Clan member from earlier, aren’t you?” the receptionist (with wavy hair and a huge rack) remarked when she saw my eyes. “As you say, ma’am. I am from the Crimson Magic Clan. Starting today, I intend to make this town my base of operations, so I’ve come to request that you check my Adventurer’s Card.” “I see. Here, let me have a look… O-oh my goodness! This is incredible—I know they say Crimson Magic Clansfolk have tremendous Intelligence and Magic, but these numbers are amazing…!” The receptionist’s astonishment set off a buzz among the gathered adventurers. Yes! This was what I wanted. I wanted everyone to see the receptionist’s surprise at my stats and start talking about me! Now no one would mock or ridicule— “Well, not quite as amazing as that woman yesterday, but still, a very high Magic stat… Good, I see you don’t have any criminal history, and your card is authentic. You may accept your first assignment whenever you’re ready.” …Huh? “Just a moment, please—what woman from yesterday? Are you suggesting there was someone with a higher Magic stat than mine?” “Oh, I was referring to someone who registered as an adventurer yesterday… Her Intelligence score was too low to permit her to be a Wizard of any sort… I believe she settled on being an Arch-priest.” Arch-priest? “Ohhh, her.” “Her.” “She was a looker, too. Damn shame… And she kept jabbering about being a goddess or something.” “If only she wasn’t Axis. Oh, and if only she wasn’t so bent on making a fool of herself. I would totally ask her to be in my party…” “I’m sure she says those stupid things because she’s an Axis priest.” The receptionist’s comment had inspired a lengthy chorus of whispers from the eavesdropping adventurers. So who was she? It must have been the Arch-priest in question, but why the contemptuous tone? In any event, if she had gone into the clergy, then she would be no obstacle to my own quest to become the strongest Arch-wizard, so it didn’t much matter to me. I had something more important to do… “H-hey! Are you available right now? Have you decided who you’re going to adventure with yet?” “Hey, no fair! I saw her first!” “My party has two advanced classes in it! How about it?!” My conversation with the receptionist had inspired a frenzied contest to recruit me. 4 I was in a corner of the tavern, where a young girl and guy were introducing themselves to me. “My name’s Ryze. I’m a Warrior. And this is Laina, the Thief. Nice to meetcha!” “My name is Megumin. A pleasure.” ““…Is that your real name?”” “Yes, it is. If you have a problem with my name, I shall hear it.” “U-uh-uh! No problem! Oh yeah, I guess we did hear you were from the Crimson Magic Clan…” “Y-yeah, I think it’s a great name!” The two of them were eager to prevent any potential rift. I had decided to join up with this brother-sister duo. A normal adventuring party had anywhere between four and six people in it, but fewer people meant a bigger share of the loot for each member. At the moment, the only money I had to my name was the honorarium provided by the caravan leader, so I needed to start earning, and fast. It occurred to me to glance over to the table where I had been sitting with Yunyun. She was sitting still as a stone and peering uneasily around the building. It seemed she didn’t even have it in her to go through the seeking-group flyers and ask someone to let her join them. Her whispered “Excuse me…” and discreet waves of her hand were quickly lost in the bustling Guild. This would be an excellent chance for her to work on overcoming her shyness. It would be best for me not to help and instead let her handle things on her own. “What’s up? Some other adventurer you’re curious about?” “With you joining us, Megumin, we’ve still only got three people in our party. There’s room for someone else if you like.” “No, it’s quite all right. Shall we begin with a simple hunting quest? An easy assignment will help us see how this party jibes. Call it a probationary period.” Ryze and Laina didn’t object. In the distance, Yunyun, after a fair amount of dithering, had gotten some paper from the receptionist and was writing something. It seemed she had already given up on talking to anyone and decided to make her own flyer instead. “Here’s a Chestnut Rat hunt. What do you think, Megumin?” “The Chestnut Rats should be nice and fat this time of year,” Laina said. “It’ll make them tasty.” I didn’t know what a Chestnut Rat was. From Laina’s remarks about fat and tastiness, I thought perhaps they were some kind of edible monster. This was, after all, autumn: the season of the raging appetite. And the time when chestnuts were at their tastiest. The name of this monster was enough to make me excited. “Well, let’s do it, then!” I nodded at them, feeling a rush of excitement for my very first quest. 5 Chestnut Rats. They were called that, I discovered, because they liked to feed on chestnuts, which made their meat soft and flavorful. About the size of a medium-ish dog, the nimble rodents would invade local farms and tear through the fall produce. “Megumin, Megumin! There’s a whole bunch of them heading in our direction! Here they come—argh, they’re coming! Take them out with your magic! Laina, cover Megumin to make sure the rats don’t get near her!” “Watch out, Ryze! There’s one in the shadows!” “Yikes! Gotta be careful…!” There was a hollow thump from Ryze’s shield as the Chestnut Rat slammed against it. “Leave it to me—I can wipe out a horde this size in one blow! Just buy me a little time!” “A-are you sure?! We’re not just talking about a few rodents here! O-okay, do what you need to do!” “Ryze, keep your eyes to the front!” Laina shouted, tossing a throwing knife into the swarm of rats; her brother quickly brought up his shield. There was another thump and an unpleasant scraping sound as a Chestnut Rat’s quills scratched across the metal surface. Anything less than metal equipment and the target of one of those body slams would be in a good deal of trouble. Laina flung knife after knife, skewering individual rats, Ryze barely keeping them at bay. I felt a bead of sweat run down my cheek—maybe I was nervous, faced with the reality that failure was not an option. At last, though, my incantation was complete, and I held my staff high and shouted. “Both of you, get some distance from the enemy! I’m going to drop it right in the middle of the swarm!” ““On it!”” They both disengaged from the rats. At almost the same instant, I unleashed my spell! “Explooosion!” A flash of light erupted from the end of my staff, piercing to the heart of the horde. There was a white flash as it landed and then a great, expanding heat powered by tremendous magical energy. The roar filled the entire farm as my spell annihilated the Chestnut Rats. But the power of my explosion didn’t stop there: It even consumed the chestnut trees the rats had been using as food and flung Ryze and Laina to the ground. The two of them cried out, and even I was blown back by the shock wave, but I was drunk on the satisfaction of having destroyed a huge host of monsters in one fell swoop. …Next time, though, I would definitely have to be more aware of the area of effect of my own magic. “Hff… Hff… Wh-wh-wh-wha…?” “Wh-what in the heck was that?!” Laina and Ryze exclaimed, surveying the devastation as they got to their feet. “Heh! You see what becomes of Chestnut Rats who dare to stand against me! That spell was my secret technique, the ultimate magic: Explosion!” “E-Explosion?! The same Explosion that’s supposed to use so much MP that almost no one can cast it?! I’ve always heard it was just a gimmick, but what was gimmicky about that?! You altered the entire terrain!” “All those rats in just one shot… I-incredible…!” The two of them proved suitably impressed. Then Ryze said, “Let’s hit some of the other places that are having trouble with Chestnut Rats. Maybe you could use a different spell next time, though? Chestnut Rats don’t usually have a big bounty on them. The way you make money is by selling their meat.” “That’s true, not to mention that you decimated this entire chestnut farm. Wonder how much compensation they’ll want… Ah well. Give it a hundred rats or so, and we should be back in the black. Hey…” Laina crouched down next to me. “How long do you plan to lie there? Did you get hurt when the blast knocked you over?” She looked so genuinely concerned. “No, I am simply paralyzed for lack of MP. I don’t believe I will be casting any more spells today…” Chomusuke had toddled over to my prone form and was sniffing my face. Glancing at the cat, Ryze said, “Does it really take that much magic? Okay, well, let’s say no explosions for a while, starting tomorrow. Just use something else. Save them for, y’know, emergencies or whatever.” “Good thinking—intermediate or advanced magic should be plenty…” Finally, I told the talkative pair, “I can’t.” “Huh…? What do you mean, you can’t? Can’t what?” “Ohhh, you mean you can’t use advanced magic? Like I said, I think intermediate magic should be fine…” “No, I cannot use anything but Explosion. It is the only spell I know.” ““…………”” The two of them fell silent for a moment until Ryze said, “Uh, the only one? Really?” “That’s correct.” “…So it’s the only spell you can use, and you can only use it once a day?” “Yes.” They spent another moment in silence. ““………Hang tight, Megumin. Sibling huddle.”” “Huh?” They scurried away from me where I lay on the ground. Trapped on my back, I couldn’t hear what they were saying. After a few minutes, they came back. “…Okay, so, uh, we’ve been thinking, and we feel as if maybe newbie adventurers like us can’t give you the best opportunity to use your skills, Megumin.” “Y-yeah, that’s right. Explosion is a better spell than we deserve. It’s wasted on our party.” They didn’t sound very convincing. “Oh, that does not matter to me. You will grow into it over time…” I thought the whole point of a party was to cover for one another’s weaknesses. But Ryze promptly shook his head. “No, no, listen, it was conceited of us—a couple of newcomers—trying to recruit an Arch-wizard of the Crimson Magic Clan!” “Yeah, uh-huh! I m-mean, look at us—we aren’t even advanced classes or anything! Think about, uh, the composition or…balance, you know?” Hrm… If they were so insistent, then so be it. “Paying for those chestnut trees is going to put us into debt for a while, but don’t worry, we’ll take care of it!” “He’s right! Someday when we’re stronger, Megumin, maybe we’ll be a better match for you! Let’s do this again then, okay?!” I leaned on their shoulders, as they tried to talk their way out of forming a party with me, all the way back to the Guild. 6 Well, this was a problem. I was naturally uncomfortable making people I had just met that day pay for trees I had destroyed, so I went ahead and paid for the damage myself, but… “Now I’m all out of money…” I rested against the table, woozy with lack of magic, staring at my now very light wallet. At a table in the corner of the tavern, quite some distance from me, Yunyun was dispiritedly picking at some food. Had no one responded to her flyer? When I had regained enough MP that I could move a little again, curiosity got the better of me, and I went to look at what Yunyun had posted. It wasn’t hard to tell which one was hers… PARTY MEMBERS WANTED: Ideal candidates will be kind, willing to listen (even to boring stuff), won’t laugh at a strange name, will be willing to hang out even on days when there’s no quest. Seeking frontline adventurer. Hopefully one of similar age. I am an Arch-wizard who has just turned thirteen.