“I know that! I do, but—!!” Yunyun still wasn’t giving in. Arue plopped a hand on her shoulder. “C’mon—calm down. Just what part of the Duxion do you need for your potion, Megumin? If it’s an internal organ, we’ll have to wring its neck, but otherwise…” Yunyun looked at me tremblingly. “The ingredient I need is the onion it’s carrying,” I said. “Does that make you feel better?” I flashed her a reassuring smile. Apparently, it did, because Yunyun gave a sigh of relief and let go of my hand. “Onions have long been said to possess curative properties,” Arue explained. “Prescriptions include eating onions, wrapping the site in onions, and, in some cases, jabbing the onion right up the problem area. The Duxion’s onion is supposed to be the highest-quality onion you can find.” As she spoke, she relieved the Duxion of several sprigs of its onion and started cutting them up. As for me, I looked at Yunyun. “My word… Just what do you take me for? Even I have at least the basic decency to care for an adorable living creature. I don’t seek to take life unnecessarily.” “O-of course not. I’m sorry! Phew… It’s just that I’ve heard Duxions are worth a ton of experience points, and they’re supposed to be absolutely delicious, too, so I thought…” “………” A rare monster worth tons of experience points? Absolutely delicious? “I’m really sorry. I was thinking, you know, that it would have been three birds with one stone for you—your ingredients, experience points, and lunch, so…” “Kyu!” The Duxion gave a little yelp and went limp when I strangled it. I looked at my Adventurer’s Card: I had gained two levels at a stroke, meaning two additional skill points to spend. I proudly showed the card to Yunyun, whose mouth was working open and shut silently. “Look who got some new levels.” “How could yooooooooou?!” 6 After class. “What do you want, Duxion Slayer? Why are we here?” “Megumin, you’d better apologize to Yunyun, okay? I think she really took this morning hard. She’s been moping around ever since.” Funifura and Dodonko had only just opened their mouths. We were back behind the school building, where I had called them. “The next time you call me Duxion Slayer, you will be in for it. In any case, the events of this morning—which traumatized not just Yunyun but a great many of our classmates—were ultimately inspired by the two of you. Do you know what I was making?” Funifura and Dodonko looked at each other. “You can’t be saying…” “That potion you’re holding…” “Precisely: This is my own sickness-curing potion.” Both of them looked profoundly disturbed. “I sympathize. I know you must be worried. However, I followed the recipe exactly, so there won’t be any problems. All right, I may have gone a bit heavy on the ingredients, but I assume that will only make it more effective. Come on, now—take it.” “Uh…” Funifura, still obviously concerned, slowly reached out and reluctantly took the bottle. “There,” I said. “Now you no longer need the money you borrowed from Yunyun. You shall return that money to me in exchange for that potion.” “What? J-just a second—we don’t even know if it’s going to work…!” I didn’t let Funifura go any further. “That hardly matters. Nor does the question of whether your little brother is even actually ill, Funifura.” My intent was to shut them up. “Ergh… L-look, that’s…” “I-it’s totally true! Funifura’s kid brother is totally sick!” Dodonko interjected. But, as I had said, I didn’t care. “What I’m trying to say is, you took advantage of a lonely young woman’s good heart to weasel money out of her. That girl happens to be the second smartest person in class after me. She’s not stupid, understand? I promise you she noticed how suspicious I thought this whole thing was, and still she—” I stalked closer to them as I spoke; they backed up, blanching. “Look, okay?! We’ll give back the stupid money! Geez, your eyes—they’re, like, completely red!” “Don’t get so angry! Y-you’re scaring me!” Then they coughed up the money Yunyun had given them. Oops, looks like I got dangerously serious for a moment there. When a member of the Crimson Magic Clan gets very emotional, the red glow of their eyes increases. At this rate, I was at risk of sacrificing my cool image. “…Very well. I shall return this money to Yunyun. If you truly approached her in a spirit of friendship, that’s one thing, but if you were just looking to get something out of her, then please stop. Otherwise, when I have finally learned my magic, the first thing I’ll test it on will be you two.” “G-geez, we get it! ‘Very well,’ she says. Her eyes are still bright red! You’re, like, totally in love with Yunyun!” “We won’t get between you two anymore, so just go have fun…!” Funifura and Dodonko kept saying……… What? “…I believe you are misinformed. I am not particularly close to Yunyun… For that matter, we are not even friends.” “Yeah, sure, just leave us alone.” “You did all this for her, and then you say you’re not even friends? What are you, then?” The two of them fanned their cheeks in annoyance as if to say, Ooh, it’s steamy. “What do you mean, what are we? We’re just, you know…rivals, I suppose…” “Uh-huh, yeah, sure. Seriously, whatever you say. All I can tell you is that from where we’re standing, it looks awfully lovey-dovey between you two.” “Megumin, your eyes say it all… The problem for us Crimson Magic Clan members is that we can’t lie when we’re like that.” ……… “Anyway, we give up this time. But don’t let being head of the class go to your head.” “Yeah, she’s right. While the two of you are busy making eyes at each other, the rest of us might come from behind and pass you right by. If I become the best student in class, your precious wife might just think I’m her new rival, eh? You’d better watch out so we don’t—” I didn’t care to let them finish their parting shots; I simply attacked. “Hey! Argh, you just gave me this potion—don’t break it! No fair, you’re the worst! S-stoooop…!” “L-learn to read a crowd! You have to have a parting shot when…! Hey, don’t…!” 7 My counterattack on the girls complete, I went back to the classroom with a light heart and a smile on my face to get Ink and my bag. When I stepped inside, I found Yunyun in there by herself, looking despondent. “…What are you doing here all alone?” “What do you mean, what am I doing here?! I was waiting for you, Megumin! You just left Ink and ran off somewhere!” I guess she had been waiting to go home with me. “Oh, I just had some business with Funifura,” I replied. As I realized that Yunyun and I now, apparently, had made a routine of walking home together, Funifura’s and Dodonko’s words echoed in my mind. …W-well, in light of the recent sightings of the Dark God’s servant, we could afford to set aside our rivalry for the time being. No, I would not call us friends, but in troubled times like these… Sure, Yunyun sounded angry, but the relief on her face after she had been sitting there by herself was far more evident. “You had something to do with Funifura? That’s unusual. Anyway, let’s go home. We should hurry—Teacher said they’re resealing the god tonight…” “Here, this is for you.” As Yunyun got ready to go, I gave her the money from Funifura. Yunyun stood there with the little pouch of coins in her hand, looking completely flummoxed. I grabbed my bag as if to say we were done here. I tried to stuff Ink inside, but for some reason she just wouldn’t go. She dug her claws into my shoulder and resisted mightily. “Megumin, this money…” “It is from Funifura. I guess she managed to get medicine for her brother somehow. So she wanted to give that back to you. Isn’t that nice?” I continued trying to peel Ink off my shoulder. D-dumb cat! Did she really hate being in my bag that much? Just as our battle was really heating up, Yunyun said, “Say, uh. Did you…do anything for Funifura’s brother? I mean, you… You were working on a sickness-curing potion or something…” She was practically mumbling by this point. Behold, Funifura, Dodonko. I told you she was the second smartest student after me. “Would a pragmatist like me do something so unlikely to yield any personal benefit?” “Well, that’s…actually an extremely persuasive way of looking at it.” ……… “Hey, why are you leaving all of a sudden?! I’ve been waiting ages for you! Don’t ditch me!” Outside, the sun was sinking in the west, and soon it would be evening. Yunyun rushed to catch up with me. Ink, who completely refused to go in my bag, was perched on my shoulder as I walked along the road home. “Megumin, you really didn’t do anything, did you?” “You are a skeptical one. Say I had made some kind of medicine for Funifura’s little brother. It would be no trouble to anyone, so what’s the harm?” “I—I think you harmed a lot of girls in potions class this morning…” I didn’t respond, just kept walking silently along. Yunyun picked up her pace so she could walk alongside me. She glanced over and said, “…Listen, Megumin. I’m not, you know, saying thank you or anything, but… You want to stop somewhere on the way home? I’ve got my money back and all. I’ll treat you to something.” This time it was my turn to glance at her. She was smiling. …It looked like my rival had already figured out more or less what had happened. She was just that smart. 8 “I did say I’d treat you. I’ll admit that. But, um…” We had left the shop and were on the way home again. Yunyun was peering into her wallet and sighing. “And a fine treat it was. This is the first time since the day I was born that I’ve had so much to eat. I don’t think I could take another bite the rest of the day.” “Well, thank goodness for that! Oh, sigh… I know I said you could eat as much as you wanted, but…!” Yunyun’s miffed voice sounded along the twilit road. “Phew… It is indeed difficult to walk after eating so much. Maybe we should take a rest somewhere until I’ve digested a bit?” “Argh… Just, argh…! How much of a glutton do you have to be to eat that much anyway…?!” Yunyun sounded partly angry and partly just exasperated. In due course, we came upon the village’s park. Well, park might be a strong word: It was just a bench, a pond, and a small structure in case it rained. I peeled Ink off my shoulder and lay on my back on the bench. “M-Megumin! Your skirt! Anyone can walk by and see your underwear! Oh, for…! That’s not very ladylike…” Yunyun gallantly flipped my skirt back down for me. “I think you will make an excellent wife, Yunyun. Perhaps you could take care of me after we graduate? I promise you, I am the kind of person who will eat your food every day and still be sure to say it’s delicious.” “N-no way! Why should I?! You think calling my food delicious is all it takes?! Just…telling me my cooking is delicious every day… Every day… Hmmmm…” Suddenly she seemed on the fence about it. Naive as always. Maybe it was these absurd exchanges that made Funifura and Dodonko claim we were all lovey-dovey. “Speaking of graduation, what do you plan to do after I’m gone, Yunyun? I’ll be able to graduate with just one more skill-up potion, you know.” “What? How’d that happen? I was sure you told me you needed another four points to reach your magic. So after yesterday’s skill-up potion, you should be at three to go, just like me…… Oh!!” Then it struck her. “The Duxion this morning! You strangled that Duxion, and your level—!” “Went up by two, yes. A total of three skill points when combined with yesterday’s potion. I need only one more before I have enough points to learn my spell. I assume I will graduate after the next test.” Ink climbed onto my tummy. How could she be so brazen? Yunyun’s voice was small; she sounded on the verge of tears as she said, “I—I can’t believe it… We won’t be able to graduate together…? After I worked so hard to match our skill points…” She sniffled a little… …and I sat up ramrod straight, sending Ink tumbling off me. “What did you just say?” I demanded. “Have you specifically been manipulating your skill points so you could graduate alongside me? Was your failure to get into the top three on yesterday’s test deliberate, so as not to earn yourself a skill-up potion?” “?!” Yunyun flinched, an oops look on her face. That was all the confirmation I needed. “What kind of a fool?! If you were that eager to graduate together, then just put off learning your spell until we’re both ready, no matter how many skill points you have! For that matter, you couldn’t just hold off learning Advanced Magic or tell me you wanted to graduate together; you had to resort to this? There’s foolish and then there’s downright stupid!” “B-b-but, but, Megumin, you were always so far ahead of me, and then all of a sudden I was past you! I was so sure you were going to graduate first…!” “Ah! You just said you got past me! You have not! You have by no means passed me! In this very special case, I will tell you the truth: I have no interest in learning Advanced Magic! I have my eye on a killer spell far more powerful than that! Behold my Adventurer’s Card! I long ago earned enough points for mere Advanced Magic!” I jumped up from the bench in my fervor, holding my card under Yunyun’s nose. She studied it intently. “Y-you really do…! Phew, I knew you were more amazing than me, Megumin…!” “What? …Uh, yes. Well, I am amazing. Thus, ahem, it would be most problematic for me were you to hold back.” It was awkward enough just to have Yunyun standing there grinning, obviously thrilled about this. Maybe she really did just want the strongest possible rival. “Y-yeah. I’m sorry about that. But a spell more incredible than anything in advanced magic? What, do you want to learn blasting magic? Or…don’t tell me…detonation magic…?” “I speak of Explosion.” …………That shut Yunyun up for a while. “Um, did I…hear you right? It sounded like you said ‘Explosion.’” “Yes, Explosion. A spell most incredible, often called the strongest of magics.” Yunyun went quiet again, until… “What are you talking about? You mean Explosion, like, that Explosion? The one everyone calls a gimmick? The spell that demands more skill points than anything else anyone of any class will ever learn, and that even if you do learn it, you probably can’t use it, and that even if you can use it, one burst will leave you paralyzed because you have no MP left?” “Yes. That is the Explosion I’m talking about.” I nodded. Yunyun took a deep breath and…! “What are you, stupid?! Megumin, what are you even talking about?! What could you possibly do with that spell?! Most people who learn it don’t even have the MP to use it, remember? And if you somehow managed, the best you could hope for would be once a day. It’s a gimmick with no practical applications, okay?! What are you thinking?! Have you gone nuts?! They say genius and idiocy are just a stone’s throw apart from each other! Megumin, have you crossed that line?!” “Yunyun, I will not abide any more of this talk of stupidness and idiocy, even from you! …Anyway, I am well aware of the details by now. I have done more research on Explosion than anyone else. I daresay I am the most knowledgeable person in this village today when it comes to Explosion.” “If you know so much about it, then why do you want to learn it?! Megumin, you… If you learn Advanced Magic like you’re supposed to… If you start gaining some experience… You could be the sort of wizard whose name goes down in history…! So why?!” For some reason, my choice moved Yunyun to tears. We had come this far. I gave her the honest answer. “It is, of course, because I love Explosion.” Yunyun’s eyes were wide; maybe she had been expecting some deeper reason. “…I take it back, Megumin. You’re not a genius; you are an idiot.” “I warned you you would pay for any more idiot talk!” I launched myself at Yunyun! 9 “Huff… Puff…! I won…! For the first time in my life, I beat you, Megumin…!” Yunyun’s face was shining, and she was clearly happy from the bottom of her heart. Un… Unbelievable…! For the first time in my life, I had lost to Yunyun. “Ahem, well, it’s true I was not giving this battle my full attention. You know how it is. I am the sort of person whose power wanes with the moon.” “I know that’s not true. You’re not a demon or something! Just admit you lost!” Yunyun had me pinned after our tussle in the otherwise empty park. The cool earth felt good against my flushed skin. The sun was going down. Both of us were breathing hard. The blood had gone to my head, and I let myself get involved in hand-to-hand combat, not a specialty of mine. “Sigh… I admit it—I lost, so please let me go. I lost, okay? Uncle.” Yunyun politely let me go. “…Phew, yes, I lost. I suppose it’s only to be expected, me having eaten so much. If I had to quantify it, I would say I wasn’t able to use half my usual strength.” “Hey! You can’t start making up excuses now that I’ve let you go!” Yunyun was obviously distressed, but I simply stood up, brushing the dirt off my knees. “I’m glad you were able to win once before I left on my journey. You’ll be the chief of this place one day, Yunyun. While I am out making my name as a wizard of great renown in the world, you can grow old leading a perfectly ordinary life here in the village.” “Couldn’t you just stop at ‘I’m glad you won’?! You just have to twist the knife. You actually do feel bad about losing, don’t you?! …Hey, wait… You’re going on some kind of journey when you graduate?” Yunyun asked nervously. I picked up Ink, who had inched closer to my feet. “Yes indeed I am. I will tell you and you alone, Yunyun. But there is in fact a reason for my love of Explosion.” Ink had affixed herself to the shoulder of my robe once again; it seemed to be her favorite spot. I gave her a nice scratch on the head as I revealed to Yunyun something I had never even told my parents. “When I was young, I was once attacked by a magical beast. A wizard woman who happened to be passing by dispatched the creature with Explosion. The destructive force of that blast. The overwhelming violence. The absolute power. It was staggering, truly fit to be called the most powerful of spells. Seeing it just that one time was enough to rob me of any desire to learn anything else.” The hooded woman’s voice and presence were hazy in my memory now, but the explosion—that remained etched in my mind’s eye as clearly as the day I saw it. Just remembering it was enough to make my chest hot and tight. I had no interest in the romantic gossip Funifura and Dodonko liked to share, nor did I have any noble goals like Yunyun, working so hard to become the leader of our clan. All I wanted in life was to see that hooded woman one more time and to show her my own explosion. I wanted to see her and say thank you. Then I would ask her: What did you think of my explosion? Of the magic I learned from you? When I had finished telling Yunyun about this, my one and only dream, all the disapproval disappeared from her face. She looked almost relieved, nearly as if she understood. “With a story like that, how can I object? An explosion wizard really walks a path of thorns, though. With your MP, Megumin, I think you can probably use the spell, but then you won’t be able to move. A journey is all well and good, but if you do it alone, then what if you use your magic, can’t move, and some other monster finds you defenseless on the ground and attacks you? Do you have anyone who can go with you?” “I have about as many friends as you do, so of course I don’t.” “Why do you sound proud of that?! Hey, you won’t leave on your journey, you know, the minute you learn your magic, right? You’ll stay in the village for a while, right?” “Well, I suppose. I can hardly leave my little sister to her own devices, so most likely I will find part-time work in the village and wait for the right opportunity to leave.” That seemed to give Yunyun some peace of mind. “As for you, Yunyun, you will stay in this village permanently to become the new chief, won’t you? The position is hereditary, after all.” “Yeah. I guess I’ll be chief someday. But before that, I want to have other experiences. Right now, I still need you to rescue me and stuff, Megumin, but someday…” Just when it looked like Yunyun was about to say something important, there was a small sound and Ink twitched. It was a splashing of water. We looked over and— “Oh, you don’t see one of those every day! A wild Duxion! Right here in the middle of the village…” The Duxion had been swimming in the pond; now it came toward us, obviously feeling quite safe. Despite how delicious and experience-rich they were, Duxions had some unique trait that kept other monsters from attacking them. One scholar had theorized that Duxions were so cute, even other monsters felt protective of them. The Duxion came out of the pond and waddled toward us, its big, moist eyes on Yunyun. She crouched down so as not to scare the creature. With a gentle smile on her face, she finished what she had been saying earlier. “…Right now, I still need your help, Megumin. But someday, I’m going to be the number one wizard in the village and protect the weak and helpless, like this Duxion, who…” “Kyu!” I didn’t really hear what she was saying, though, because I was more interested in making sure the Duxion didn’t get away before I wrung its neck. I held up the limp monster triumphantly. “Score one dinner for Megumin!” “How could yoooooooooooou?!” Yunyun cried, flinging herself at me. Round two! 10 “…Sheesh. It’s your fault, Yunyun, that it is practically fully dark now.” “My fault?! How is it my fault?! For that matter, how can you bring yourself to strangle such a sweet living thing? You’re always so ruthless, Megumin! You could stand to have a conscience, you know!” Yunyun went ahead of me, still angry. Thanks to our little rematch, it was now quite dark outside. Magical streetlamps illuminated the roads around the village. “We each have one win and one loss. In other words, a draw. I believe we can agree that is the same as saying there were no contests today.” “N-no, we can’t! I beat you, and that’s a fact! I finally got a victory, and nothing can change that! They don’t cancel each other out. It’s one win and one loss for each of us, and don’t you forget it! Heh-heh, I’ll have to be sure to write about today in my diary. I’ll write, ‘Today, I beat Megumin’!” “Be certain to include that after that, you were shoved helplessly to the ground and rendered powerless.” “I don’t recognize that! You need to stop using Ink as a shield! …I wonder why she likes you so much, considering how you treat her.” Yunyun looked at Ink, puzzled, but the black cat just held on to my shoulder and yawned. She truly was a strange animal. Normally, all that flailing about would cause a cat to run away or at least start meowing. I took the spoils of my victory—the Duxion—and hurried home. Yunyun had treated me to a meal, but I was sure my little sister was going hungry. I wanted to get back so she could eat my trophy. Yunyun glanced at me as I walked along, holding the Duxion and humming a little tune. “Megumin, are you sure you’re a girl? Where’s your coyness? Flirtatiousness?” “What about you, Yunyun? Are you sure you’re the chief’s daughter? Did you leave your Crimson Magic Clan member’s sense of theatricality someplace?” We stopped and stood for a moment, silent, then sidled up to each other, improbable smiles on our faces. One win, one loss today. I was hoping to settle things right here, but Yunyun glanced away. “Sigh… Why are you like this, Megumin, day after day?” “I would like to ask you the same thing. Why do you come after me every day?” I grinned. “Erk… W-well…” Yunyun tried to throw me off by starting to walk again. I followed behind her, still smirking. “…Gosh! And just when I thought today might end up a good day, finally! Are you not happy until you’ve pulled something on me every single day, Megumin? Whatever party you join in the future, I swear you’ll be nothing but trouble for them!” “I do not know what you’re talking about. The day I learn explosion magic, I will be a source of the greatest firepower for any party, able to blow away even a general of the Demon King. And any party I, the greatest genius of the Crimson Magic clan, might join would have to be an elite assembly composed entirely of advanced classes…!” I faced Yunyun, picturing the future party I had not yet met, when suddenly a loud, high-pitched sound echoed through the streets of the village. It was the bell they rang when there was an emergency. Wondering what could be going on, we turned toward the sound… We were greeted by the sight of a numberless swarm of monsters flying up into the night sky. They spread out in every direction, almost as if they were looking for something…! “M… M-M-Megumin! Those things! Th-th-those are…!” “C-c-c-calm down, Yunyun. Didn’t the teacher say that the resealing of the Dark God was going to be ‘forcible’ or something?! And I believe our careless instructor also talked about having something special ready in case they failed! So I’m sure this problem will be solved shortly!” Heck, our teacher had practically wanted to fail, as far as I could tell. Hence, I assumed there was nothing to worry about. It even occurred to me that perhaps our teacher had deliberately let things go wrong. Ink had scurried down from my shoulder and, surprisingly, into the bag she hated so much. I guess even the bold kitten was intimidated by a swarm of monsters. “Hey… H-hey!” Yunyun shouted, tugging at my sleeve as I buried Ink in the bag. She was looking at the sky and her face was pale. “Are they coming this way?” She pointed up, up at the monsters who were, indeed, clearly making their way toward us. “We have to run! My house is closest to here! Yunyun, no matter what happens to me, you must keep fighting! Don’t look back! I will let you handle things here while I go on ahead!” When Yunyun heard that…! “Y-you idiot! What are you talking about?! Megumin, I could never leave you behi— Wait, what? What did you say?! Tell me what you said!” Yunyun had not been kind enough to miss my final words and protested tearfully. I glanced back—ignoring her—and found the monsters cruising easily through the sky toward us. “Y-Yunyun, how many skill points do you have?! Do you not yet have enough to learn Advanced Magic at this very moment?!” “Of course not! But, Megumin, if you forget about Explosion and take Advanced Magic right now, you could clean up those monsters with one spell! Come on, do it, pleeease!” Yunyun appealed to me, again tearfully, but on this point, I could not budge! Learning explosion magic had been the focus of everything I had done in my life! “There is no hope; they’re right on top of— Huh?” “…They went right past us.” Several of the monsters had indeed swooped over our heads without so much as noticing us, flying off somewhere else. I let out a breath of relief and looked in the direction where the bell was still ringing. I saw several bright bursts of light illuminating the night sky. I was certain they marked where the village adults were exercising their powers. I was confident they would soon have the situation under control. But we still needed to get home quickly. “Yunyun, you should come home with me. Stay at my house tonight.” “What? S-stay at—? Can I?!” “But of course. What with all the monsters wandering around, I can’t imagine you want to go all the way to your own house. I will lend you some of my pajamas, but if you complain that the chest is too tight or the pants are too short, I will make you sleep naked.” “I—I won’t complain! I can live with that, believe me!” She did not, however, deny that the chest might be a little tight or the pants a little short. I contemplated starting round three, but we didn’t have time for it with things the way they were. “We are almost to my house. Let’s go quickly. My little sister is the only one at home today. She will be starving by now, but I’m sure she will have locked the doors and will be looking after the house. It is a cramped, ramshackle place, but as long as the doors are locked, even those monsters can’t—” —get inside. I didn’t finish my sentence. The Duxion in my hand dropped to the ground. I stared uncomprehendingly at the smashed door of our house and whispered: “………Komekko?”
Chapter 16
26 min read