🎃 🎃 🎃
THE students of Ark School still went to church on days without classes. It was the Sunday service where they prayed and discussed the Bible. Some students participated intently, while others nodded off or quietly studied.
They didn’t skip the service because of the tea party held afterward.
Unlike the modest Elevenses, this gathering consisted of mountains of fancy cakes and sandwiches. Many students spent the week waiting for this event.
Once we saw that the chapel doors had been closed and the students inside quieted down, Leeds and I went out onto the grass plaza. Dum and Dee’s job was to attend the service and capture the trap-laying demon if they showed their face.
I had to send them there if I didn’t want them interfering while I talked to Dark.
Thick clouds covered the sky that day, leaving the sun only faintly visible.
Leeds walked in front of me to shroud me from the strong autumn wind. I was carrying my basket full of gifts from the other students. There were all kinds of food items inside, so we’d have things to eat if our conversation lasted a long time.
Jack was standing in front of the door when we approached Unicorn Dorm. His hair was still messy from the night’s sleep. He stretched his arms in the air and yawned.
“Good morning, Jack,” I greeted. “I see you’re still in your pajamas.”
“It’s that damn Knightley’s fault. He locked me out when I said you were coming to visit. So bloody annoying!” Jack kicked a planter of pansies to channel his irritation. But it only wobbled and remained standing. “Damn. Everything about this body is awful. I want to go back to normal already.”
Jack clicked his tongue. His sentiment was the opposite of the twins’.
“You want to undo the demon’s spell, Jack?”
“Of course I do. Why do I have to relive the most powerless years of my life? I’m not some loser who thinks of his childhood as his happiest times.”
“That’s true. There’s so much you can’t do as a child…” I agreed.
Jack constantly felt helpless now that he was a child again. Perhaps Dum and Dee felt the same before the spell grew their bodies. They didn’t want to go back to normal because they were painfully aware of childhood’s inherent hardships.
I’d relied on the two of them for years, but there were still things I could never put children in charge of. I usually left Leeds and Jack to take on jobs that took them to busy streets or kept them up all night.
Sometimes, I even ordered the twins to stay home when it was time to punish our target in the dead of night. I told them it was their job to protect the manor, but maybe they’d hated that role all this time.
But adults have their burdens to bear, too. It’s important to be nostalgic for your childhood so that you never forget just how short human life is.
I wanted to search for a way to convey that to the twins together with Dark.
“I’m going to try talking to Dark. Where is his room?” I asked.
“The one in the northern corner of the second floor. Knightley and I are using it, but all the other students are at Sunday service, so they shouldn’t bother you. Do you need tea?”
“I’d like some, but you need to change first, don’t you? Jack, come with me. Leeds, stay here and guard the bottom floor.”
“Got it.”
Jack and I headed to their room.
The hallway smelled of laundry soap. We walked until we reached the locked door at the end of the building. I knocked.
“It’s me, Dark. I want to talk. Can you open the door?” I spoke loudly, but the room remained silent inside.
“My lady wants to see you, and you just ignore her?!” Jack roared. “I can’t even get dressed because you locked yourself in there!”
The door flew open. Dark was wearing white bedsheets over his horns. He balled up Jack’s uniform and flung it at him.
“Your clothes.”
“Bff!”
The impact on his face made Jack stumble backward. I quickly put my hands on his back to support him.
“Dark, what was that for?” I asked.
“……”
Dark closed the door again, his expression as apathetic as ever. Jack peeled the clothes off his face, snapped his teeth like a turtle, and kicked the door.
“Damn you, Knightley!!”
“Calm down, Jack,” I soothed. He might end up starting a fire if he got too angry. Fortunately, he was small enough that I could wrap my arms around him to stop him. “Leave Dark to me. Can you prepare tea for us?”
“Tsk! Don’t you dare throw anything at her, Knightley.”
Jack took his uniform and went downstairs.
Now that I was alone in the hallway, I knocked on the door again.
“Can you let me in, Dark? I brought sweets that I got from the other boys. Some are quite rare, too, so I thought we could eat them together.”
“……”
He didn’t respond. The twins would always race to me if they heard I had sweets, even if we were playing hide-and-seek. I would have to talk to him like this since I didn’t have another choice.
“I feel like you’ve been avoiding me lately,” I said. “I’ve always known you to be a confident, cheerful person to the point of arrogance. You succeed in everything you do, and you never abandon me. Did becoming a child make you lose that self-confidence?”
I didn’t hear a peep on the other side of the door. Dark still wasn’t responding.
“No matter what you look like, you’re still Earl Knightley, the star of high society. I understand that you’re at a loss now, and I know being unable to hide your horns is a burden, but please don’t lose sight of who you are. When you’re feeling hopeless, you can rely on me.”
I believed a person’s true essence existed in their soul, not their body. That was why I could never let my surroundings or situations control my heart. When a person was in emotional pain, crying an ocean of tears would serve no purpose but to drown them.
“It feels better to discuss your worries with other people,” I continued. “It’s a way to untangle all the complex feelings in your mind. I want to know how you feel right now. Do you want to go back to normal? Or do you want to stay like this? Can you tell me that, at least?”
“…Alice.”
He finally replied.
When I thought about how Rabbit—the boy wearing the sheets to cover his head—was right on the other side of this door, a warm feeling grew in my chest.
“What is it, Dark?”
“Can you just leave? If I see you right now, I might say terrible things to you…”
“Say them. Unlike you, I can’t read human minds with a kiss.”
After a long period of silence, Dark finally spoke out.
“…We have to go back to normal. I can’t face you like this.”
“But I think you look lovely.”
“This is lovely?”
The door opened slowly. Dark was smiling with his sheets wrapped around his head. When I saw the light burning in those sapphire eyes, nearly covered by fabric, I felt the blood drain from my face.
Dark’s lips weren’t curled up because he was happy. He was angry. My simple words had made him furious.
Dark grabbed my arm and pulled me close. “What’s so lovely about this disgusting body?” His slender fingers touched my cheek before trailing downward until he tugged on the ribbon on my neck. He wanted me to bend down.
I knew he wanted to kiss me to see how I truly felt. If it would bring Dark some relief, I was happy to oblige. I bent forward and closed my eyes.
His face drew closer. I held my breath.
I’d kissed Dark many times before, so I knew what came next.
His touch was going to make me so unbearably happy.
But…our lips never connected. I felt him pull away instead.
“…I can’t.”
What?
Startled, I opened my eyes and saw Dark looking at me like he was about to cry.