I said it. I didn’t have to say it, but I did.
“Are you telling me to hate you, Sir Polidoro?” she asked.
“At the very least, I’m in a position where I earn hatred from others,” I replied. “I’m well aware of that.”
Everyone in this kingdom lauded me. They told me that I held honor as a knight and that the late Lord Reckenbell would be elated. But I wasn’t so sure about that. Was that truly the right way to go? I’d killed Lady Nina’s beloved mother. If I were in her position, it would be only natural for me to hate my mother’s murderer.
I put myself in Lady Nina’s shoes. Every person in Villendorf praised me for my actions—their morals and values implied that I wasn’t a man who deserved to be resented for what I’d done. They all accepted my deeds, but it must’ve been painful for Lady Nina to hear; she’d lost her mother to me. It was a tough pill to swallow. She had to keep telling herself that her hatred was misdirected because the people around her told her so. But she had every right to hate me. I was here today with the resolve to be hated by the relatives of the people that I killed.
“Once you’ve made up your mind, feel free to challenge me whenever you wish,” I said gently. “I can’t say that I’d happily accept, but I shall not decline your challenge.”
Lady Nina fell silent for a few moments before she opened her mouth once more.
“Enough. I suppose these feelings swirling within my heart are hatred toward you,” she said. She pressed her hand against her tiny, immature chest. “If you’ll acknowledge my feelings and not tell me I’m wrong to feel them, that’s good enough. I doubt that a future where you and I clash will arrive. I presume that our decade-long peace treaty will be extended.”
She flashed an expression of quiet resignation.
“Sir Polidoro, I don’t mind if we use training swords,” she said. “I don’t have to fight to the death with you. But when I turn sixteen, would you duel against me? I’d like to show my mother, who must be looking down at me from Valhalla, how much I’ve grown over the years.”
“Very well,” I replied. My response was short.
I spoke quite a bit with Lady Nina, I thought as I turned to my apprentice.
“Martina,” I said.
“My lord,” my apprentice replied.
“I also dueled against your mother, Caroline.”
“I’m aware.”
I expected as much. But there’s something that I haven’t told you.
“Moments before Caroline took her final breath, I asked if she had any last words,” I said. “And she left me with ‘Martina.’ That was all.”
“And what of it?” Martina frowned and turned away.
“You have every right to hate me as well.”
“I made you grind your head against the ground to spare my life. I do not wish to be an ungrateful person.”
“I didn’t do that simply to save you.”
It was true. To be precise, I hadn’t begged to spare the life of Martina specifically—it could’ve been any child. She’d just happened to be the pitiful prey that flew into my arms. I wasn’t on the battlefield, and it was during a time of peace. I couldn’t possibly behead a child, and the morals I held from my previous life had caused me to run wild. No matter who’d been on that stand, if placed in a similar scenario, I would’ve begged to Queen Liesenlotte to have their life spared.
“My horribly twisted honor made me act out. That’s all,” I said. “There’s no need for you to be so concerned about it, Martina. I’ll say it as many times as needed. You have every right to hate me. I kill people on the battlefield with the resolve to earn contempt from others.”
“And how long will you choose to live that way?” Martina asked.
“Until I die. Likely until someone kills me.”
I knew that I wouldn’t receive the luxury of a peaceful death lying in my bed. I’d steeled myself for my inevitable grisly fate, and that was just fine. All I wanted was a successor—one who could turn into a splendid lord knight and take over my land. As long as I had a child, I didn’t mind if I died despite my regrets.
“Ah, I really would like a wife,” I grumbled.
I ignored the two girls in the carriage as I was lost in my thoughts. When will I be able to marry?
“I’m sure that you have your preferences, Sir Polidoro,” Lady Nina replied. “What kind of woman are you willing to lie with?”
“As long as she’s pure, I wish for nothing more,” I replied.
And as long as she’s busty. The concept of virginity or chastity didn’t matter to me. I didn’t care if my partner had loved someone else in the past, or had experience with several men or women. In fact, widows were a turn-on for me.
“Purity?” Lady Nina asked.
“That’s right,” I replied. “Oh, I don’t mean virginity.”
I ultimately just want a chick with massive jugs to be beside me and give birth to my child. That’s all. That was my definition of purity—my unadulterated feelings and desires. I longed for boobs, and that was my formula for love.
“You might be a bit too young to understand, Lady Nina,” I said.
“But Lord Faust, aren’t you a virgin?” Martina asked. “You’ve got zero experience when it comes to romance, and I find it odd that you’re so smug when you speak on the topic.”
Her sharp remarks stung. You’re right, but what can I do? My appearance was loathed in Anhalt, and for a guy like me to have any chance of attaining a wife, I had to remain chaste. That was the only thing that I could offer. Since I wasn’t popular, I couldn’t get into a relationship. My inexperience only made me more unpopular. Hence, the only way to have even a shred of charm to gain a wife was to desperately protect my chastity; it was a downward spiral.
“As a Villendorfian, I honestly cannot comprehend why you’re so unpopular in your own kingdom, Sir Polidoro,” Lady Nina said. “Frankly, I struggle to understand what you mean by ‘purity’ as well, but I suppose I’m satisfied with your response.”
She cleared her throat and smiled. “Sir Polidoro, I admit that I hated you. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t see your value and charm as a man. When I turn sixteen and challenge you to a duel, will you entrust your body to me if I eke out a victory?”
I brushed her words away. “All I see is a precocious twelve-year-old trying her best to act mature.”
I wasn’t into children. I was a firm worshipper of massive cans—I held a consummate love for them. I was a good knight, a brave warrior, a devout lover of titties, and a splendid lord. I needed people to understand that. But if Lady Nina’s immature boobs blossom into melons… Well, I wouldn’t mind considering her then. As a knight, I won’t purposefully lose in a match against her even if I die, though. To protect my honor and the honor of the Polidoro fief, it was imperative that I remain undefeated. I had to uphold my record, at the very least, until I had an heir.
“Lady Nina, we’ve arrived at your manor,” a squire announced.
The carriage creaked to a stop. The place was grand and massive enough for a Noble of the Robe, with plenty of space to house the fourteen members of Princess Valiele’s corps. It was a clear indication of the depth of respect and love that Claudia von Reckenbell had received from the royal family. Honestly, this kind of house is more fitting for a minister. Villendorf had also arranged lodging in the royal capital for my thirty citizens; I didn’t want the entirety of Anhalt’s delegation to be squeezed into this manor.
“Please, come inside,” Lady Nina said.
She stepped off the carriage before me, and I obediently followed her orders as I entered the manor with Martina in tow.