But then I received Reckenbell’s head, carefully wrapped in a cloth and surrounded by flowers that Villendorf’s knights had desperately gathered in enemy territory. They weren’t used to Anhalt’s terrain and must’ve done their best. Soon after, the rest of her body, still donned in armor, was delivered to me. For the first time in my life, I sobbed my heart out with no care for the crowd around me. I failed to understand what I’d done and what my actions implied as I hugged her head tightly.
“No! I refuse to believe it!” I cried.
Tears streamed down my cheeks as I screamed my disbelief. My usual calm demeanor vanished, and I acted disgracefully, unbefitting a Villendorfian monarch. Hence, everyone was well aware that I, Queen Catalina, grieved over the loss of Reckenbell. I couldn’t quite understand these words.
When she had first come to my side, she was still fifteen and I was five. She wasn’t a feudal lord or even a lord knight. She served as the advisor of a military bureaucrat. She wasn’t even a knight captain then—just a humble hereditary knight, a mere military officer. That was my introduction to Claudia von Reckenbell.
I wasn’t disappointed in you. You didn’t have soldiers working under you, but even so, I didn’t mind. As the youngest princess, I couldn’t expect much. It was only natural that my advisor wasn’t impressive.
“Reckenbell,” I murmured.
You served a defective person like me. I was a person who couldn’t quite understand others’ feelings. I wasn’t loved by my father, and my mother had died giving birth to me—I’d practically killed her. Yet, runt of the litter that I was, Reckenbell served me well. I’d received the nickname “Princess of Matricide,” but not once did Reckenbell insult me as she became my advisor. I wonder why.
A defective person like me couldn’t fathom it. To this day, I can’t quite understand what your true thoughts were, Reckenbell. Only after she’d died did my regrets begin to pile up. I should’ve listened to her more. I should’ve spoken with her more.
Her military feats knew no equal. She’d cornered the pillaging nomads and utterly destroyed a few tribes. Unsatisfied, she continued to contribute to Villendorf as a knight, giving her all to support our country—one of the princess-elector nations of the Holy Gusten Empire. Her political endeavors bolstered our kingdom. She pushed me, the youngest of the princesses, to become Villendorf’s queen.
I thought that her long, glimmering list of achievements didn’t matter to me. I didn’t care. All I needed was her unreplaceable existence. But despite these mutterings, I found myself unable to grasp what Reckenbell truly meant to me. What were you to me? I wondered. Why were you so loyal to my commands?
“Oh, Reckenbell,” I lamented. “Why did you die?”
“Do you despise Faust von Polidoro?” the Minister of War asked.
“I don’t know. I’ve never felt anything like this before.”
I honestly answered her question as my mind once again wandered over to my lost advisor. I don’t understand you, Reckenbell. An extraordinary superhuman hero like you could’ve chosen a smarter way of life. You could’ve taken away my prestige and stolen the role of princess-elector from me.
Reckebell had held the values and morals of Villendorf—she was the hero who rushed to the front lines of war and personally fought in battle. As a defective person, I lacked these morals and values. Why were you so kind to me? I simply didn’t understand. How could I? I wished that she’d properly explained herself. I was a fool, a failure.
I understood logic. But Reckenbell hadn’t acted for profit; she’d shown me that humans could act out of love. Her daughter, Lady Nina, had said the same to me. She told me that her mother had loved me. I’m a fool unworthy of your love.
Why did you allow me to invade Anhalt? I simply utilized the spare time I received after you subjugated the nomadic tribes to launch an invasion. You must’ve had thoughts of your own, but you never divulged them to me before you passed away without any warning.
“Then do you despise a hag like me, Queen Catalina?” the minister inquired. “Your Majesty, Ina-Catalina Maria Villendorf, I’m the one who allowed you to launch the Anhalt invasion.”
“I’m the one who made the final decision,” I replied. “I cannot possibly place the blame on you alone.”
I answered logically. As the queen and highest commander of the kingdom, it was imperative that I take responsibility for my actions. Who could’ve predicted the death of Reckenbell—and at the hands of Anhalt, the ones who’d idly watched the nomads of the east arrive at the north and sent away the majority of their army, no less?
I’d known that Anhalt only had their duke’s army of five hundred to spare for their border with us. I sent over our hero, Reckenbell, with an army twice that size to catch them by surprise. Who could’ve predicted our loss? Logically, it was nigh impossible that we’d lose. And yet, we did.
We were defeated by Faust von Polidoro, who won in a duel against Reckenbell, purely by combat. His feat was combined with Princess Anastasia’s ingenious strategies and Duke Astarte’s brilliant military prowess; the two heroes brought us down. Why did we lose? We were by no means weak, but we had to admit defeat. I had to accept reality and understand that Anhalt was powerful.
They were also a princess-elector household, and they’d boasted power to begin with. I knew that well, and yet…
“An old woman like me has the resolve to shoulder the blame for our defeat, should that be necessary,” the minister said. “If you tell me to sip on some delicious wine here, I shall happily comply.”
“Wine laced with poison is the custom of Anhalt,” I replied. “You know that our kingdom would have you draw the dagger at your waist and slit your throat.”
“Indeed. Hence, drinking wine would be humiliating to the highest degree. I’m prepared for that as well.”
Enough. I grew tired of hearing the old woman’s words. She was rumored to be over a century old, and yet she remained spry as ever. No matter what I said, I knew that she could easily outwit me. My conclusion was that we’d lost. My role was to review our strategies from the ground up. It was essential that our kingdom understand the loss of Reckenbell and quietly rethink our ways. And to do that…
“I must see Faust von Polidoro with my own eyes,” I said.
“Will you gaze upon Anhalt through him?” the minister asked.
“I suspect that they’re greatly undervaluing him. If so, that would be excellent news.” I clenched my fist and offered it to the minister in front of me. “We can try to drag him to our side.”
“Will it be so simple? He’s a feudal lord knight greatly attached to the land that’s been passed down to him through the generations.”
“The Polidoro fief is close to our borders. If we invade his territory, I’m certain that he’ll accept my offer—no, he’ll have no other choice.”
During the Campaign of Villendorf, I’d managed to get my hands on a detailed map of the enemy’s territory, allowing me to grasp Faust’s weakness. I knew for a fact that his fief was within Villendorf’s reach.
“And what if we find Faust von Polidoro to be a man of high standing who commands a fair bit of Anhalt’s trust?” the minister inquired.
“Then it simply means that they’ve got a good eye for people,” I replied. “I shall even consider abandoning my plans of another invasion.”
No matter the case, the loss of Reckenbell had dealt a heavy blow to our kingdom. When those nomads eventually caught wind of her absence, they might begin to plunder from the north once more. It was imperative that I tread carefully.
“I shall use Faust as my crystal ball to peer into the state of Anhalt,” I said. “I can only make a decision from there.”
“That seems to be the only choice we have,” the minister replied.
She cackled once more, but as queen, I couldn’t genuinely laugh along with her. I didn’t know of joy. Still, I was aware that I should feign my feelings, and I forced my face to twist into a strained smile. Reckenbell had once taught me that it was best to do so. Reckenbell, who exactly were you to me? I once again quietly posed my question, knowing that the dead couldn’t possibly provide me with an answer.