Chapter 5: A Storm of Emotion
“IT finally feels like summer…”
I sat on a chair in the garden terrace of Viscount Telestraza’s castle. I eased my feet into a bucket filled with ice and flowers then created a breeze using magic to cool myself down. Klink. The sound of the ice. Orange juice sat on the glass side table—not my usual pot of fish wort medicinal tea.
“I can’t believe over a month has passed since then…”
I thought back to our operation in Mayga Cieux like it was yesterday. My days had been incredibly peaceful since then.
Long story short, the forest of Mayga Cieux recovered. The plan succeeded fantastically without any fatalities and so the curtain closed on that chapter of my life.
Once it ended, I returned on my own two legs without fainting. We all had to deal with the aftermath for a few days upon our return, but once I was no longer needed, Richard half-ordered and half-begged me to rest. And I’d been doing just that ever since, idling my days away without doing any work.
I took naps. Read books. Strolled in the courtyard. Did some embroidery. Tended to the flowerbeds on the castle grounds. Even tried my hand at cooking. It was the first time in my life I was free to do whatever I wanted.
“I haven’t even worn my holy attire lately…” Today too, after Solarus’s massage, I lazed around in a simple white dress. “I wonder what will happen to the Kingdom of Kophe moving forward…”
“I believe they’ll have to restructure everything from the bottom up.” Though I had just been talking to myself, Solarus replied anyway, her hands still busy with her needlework. “Crown Prince Medaikonar has been deposed and High Priest Pisciozze, along with many of his subordinates, have been removed from their offices. Both events combined to shake Kophe’s very foundations. Then there’s the reconstruction efforts all across the country on lands destroyed by the monster frenzy. Rebuilding through their own efforts will be very challenging.”
“Which means…Richard will remain here for a while yet,” I said.
“Yes, especially after being furnished with a number of castles to use as bases for monster campaigns.”
“He didn’t actually come to this country to…conquer it…right?” I asked.
“I would probably agree with that.”
I decided not to think about any more difficult topics and ended the conversation there. Then I started fiddling with my hair. Although my hair turned into a starkly vivid color during my connection with the earth, in the end, the garish color faded away quickly, leaving behind my usual silver hair with the pale peach gradation.
“Oh, speaking of Richard. What is he up to?” I asked.
“I’m not privy to His Highness’s schedule.”
“I…see.” I slumped deeper into my chair and swished my foot in the pail of ice.
The owner of the cheerful voice who always barged in playfully was nowhere to be found. Richard had suddenly stopped visiting me.
“Would you like to see him?” Solarus asked.
“Well, yes… But I know he’s busy. Plus, I’m not in a position to go to him.”
Saying the words aloud made me realize something again. Richard wasn’t a person a commoner saint could just brazenly go see. It had always been like this.
✦ ✦ ✦
🌹💘🌹
IT was night now. While I lamented not being able to see Richard again today, I stood on the balcony and gazed outside. Voices in conversation reached my ears.
I looked around and even leaned over the railing to identify the source. When I did, I saw Richard walking and talking intimately with someone in the corridor of an outbuilding illuminated by lamplight that burned all night. A golden-haired young lady in an evening gown.
“…!”
Without thought, I rushed back to my room. I pressed my hand to my chest and felt the violent pounding of my heart.
Is the reason…he hasn’t been visiting me lately…because of marriage talks…? Everything abruptly made sense. So he wanted to deal with everything first…including what to do with me before he came to see me again.
I knew this day would eventually come. It was only natural for Richard to marry someone. If he married a noblewoman from the Kingdom of Kophe, it would make his future work a lot easier to manage here. His network would grow too. Both the commoners and aristocrats of Kophe would accept him much more easily as “the knight who married into the Kingdom” rather than “His Imperial Highness.”
“So that’s why… Well…good for him. As long as it makes his job easier…” I muttered.
My heart hammered so hard I could hear my pulse roaring in my ears. My chest hurt so much I wanted to scream. I pushed down on my chest and crouched on the floor, trying to endure the pain.
“I’m fine… My body is just doing its usual strange dance… This is a happy occasion. It is…so it’s strange for me to feel like this.”
There was a pitcher of water and a pot of fish wort medicinal tea on the bedside table. I plucked only the leaves from the pot, placed them in the glass, then chewed them and swallowed. I prayed fervently that the intensely bitter taste and smell would pacify my heart.
“No…this isn’t working…why…something’s wrong with me…”
I slipped into bed and forcibly cast magic on myself.
“Witches, sisters of eld, grant me the comfort of sleep…”
Drowsiness overtook me before long. It started from the tips of my fingers and toes and worked its way up. I closed my eyes as I felt my body grow heavy. It was the only way I could think of to force myself into unconsciousness.
The next day, neither Solarus nor Darius would tell me anything, so I decided to take a walk in the castle and subtly question others about Richard’s movements. They all knew that he was meeting with noblewomen one after another.
“Oh, His Highness? He hosts a luncheon every day and banquets fairly often too.”
“Women with young daughters invite him to their salons.”
“Makes one wonder who His Highness will choose as his partner, hm?”
Everyone was immensely curious about this new topic related to the Ferocious Crown Prince.
“Madam Monica, if you learn anything new, make sure you let me know. Mum’s the word!”
“I will. Leave it to me.” Puffing my chest out, I agreed readily on the surface, but on the inside, I was being torn to shreds. Why?
I shouldn’t be surprised, though… After all I’m the Arousing Priestess and a commoner. This is just the natural order of the world.
The indescribable gloom spreading inside me pushed me to the brink of madness.
“No. I can’t act like this. I’m just a bit tired is all… I’ll take a break in the courtyard.”
Fish wort might be growing there now. I headed toward the castle’s inner courtyard on unsteady legs.
Refusing to lose to the summer heat, the colorful flowers in the courtyard were in full bloom. A dream-like world stretched before me.
“When plants and trees come into heat, flowers bloom and butterflies dance, creating a picturesque scene. And yet here I am, behaving so disgracefully…”
For some reason, I ended up following the vivid butterflies with my eyes as they flitted here and there, their glittering scales falling off. As I watched them, I caught sight of a long tunic made of lustrous black fabric completely unsuited for the season beyond the wall where hanging baskets were suspended in regular intervals.
“Oh, hello there, Madam Monica. What a nice surprise.” Xenu turned around with a smile. He stood under an extravagant black parasol sewn with a multitude of tassels and beads. He gently held it over my head. “So unusual to see you alone. His Highness isn’t with you today?”
He tilted his head thoughtfully in the parasol’s shade. Feeling awkward, I avoided his gaze.
“I…haven’t seen him lately.”
“Well, I should apologize for bringing up a sore subject then.”
Xenu held up a voluminous sleeve to his mouth and spoke dramatically. When I looked at his clothes closely, I realized how thin the cloth was. The sun’s rays pierced through his sleeves and hem, making the material slightly transparent. The thinness of the fabric must keep him cool even in this weather.
“There’s no need for you to be so upset, Madam Monica. When our main jobs end, it’s only natural for Prince Richard to end up out of our reach.”
“You’re right… The other holy women are doing more than enough to make up for my lack.”
The Empire was at peace too. A baby was born to Their Imperial Majesties and the potion factory was chugging along swimmingly. Kophe’s royal palace, parliament, and Church also followed Richard’s will. Not to mention the forest of Mayga Cieux had been purified. It was no wonder he didn’t need me anymore.
“Madam Monica, do you still want to work by His Highness’s side forever?”
“I… Hm. I suppose, yes.”
Hearing those words out loud I realized how ambivalent I must sound.
Huh? But why… Even though I’ve always wanted to help him and stand by him.
Tears pricked my eyes when I remembered how Richard looked smiling down at the young lady. My desire was so out of control that all I wanted to do was monopolize him. And I couldn’t do my job by his side with this feeling.