“Hey, Megumin? Do you think you could stop saying that?” Burton smugly smirked at me. “Cautious monsters are very particular about where they relieve themselves. Finding its feces here means that its turf is nearby.” He then looked around until he eventually found something and picked it up. “I found it! This is part of the Crystal Liger’s skin! It must have rubbed its body against this tree to shed old skin! It looks like it tried to smash it into small pieces and bury it, but you can’t fool these eyes!” It was a tiny, gemlike fragment, so small that it was closer to a fine powder than a rock. “All that’s left is to find the monster itself, then, huh? Ligers seem to be extremely quick, but I should be able to take care of it if I blow up the area with Explosion.” But the excited professor shook his head with a serious look on his face. “That won’t be necessary. Crystal Ligers are even rarer than Magic Eaters, so when we find it, all we need to do is take the tip of its tail. Ligers’ tails can regenerate almost immediately, and the tail alone has enough precious stones to make a massive ring!” “So you’re a conservationist now, too, huh? The tip of its tail… That means…” Everyone’s gazes shifted toward the princess holding her sword. “Crystal Ligers love shiny gems. In addition, they tend to love more expensive gems as well. Just like their cautious habits, they can’t fight their nature. Unfortunately, I was only able to get my hands on some cheap ones, but…” Burton began scattering gems in an open area slightly away from where we’d found the monster dung. “Dragons are said to love shiny things as well. There are various guesses as to why: There is mana hidden inside gold and gems, shiny objects simply have the power to confuse and control living creatures, etcetera, but—Megumin… Megumin! Will you stop picking up the gems I’m scattering?!” Those words brought me back to my senses. I had been absentmindedly picking up the gems. “Interesting. It appears gems really do have the power to control living creatures. Even a member of the Crimson Magic Clan with a resistance to magic such as I couldn’t help myself…” “You’re just obsessed with money.” I ignored Yunyun’s retort while sprinkling the gems back on the ground until all of a sudden, I felt a powerful gaze on me. I instantly looked over and saw a cat-type monster almost twice the size of a Beginner’s Bane glittering in the sun. It was staring at the necklace hanging around Iris’s neck, something a commoner could never afford. “Hey, Iris, can I ask you something? The gems on that magic necklace of yours look really expensive, so I was wondering exactly how much they were worth.” “…I was told this necklace is a national treasure…” The Crystal Liger suddenly sprinted straight for Iris! 6 “Yunyun, slow it down! I don’t even want to think about the mess we’re going to be in if that thing attacks Iris and steals a national treasure!” “Iris, run! Bottomless Swamp!” Yunyun immediately grasped the gravity of the situation and cast a swamp spell while on the verge of tears, but the Crystal Liger simply leaped over the bottomless pit without showing any signs of panicking. It hopped from tree to tree, approaching its target. It wasn’t even acknowledging our existence. Saliva dripping from its chin, the liger continued to run toward Iris at full speed as she stood in front of Burton with her sword drawn. “Liger-type monsters such as Beginner’s Banes are all good at climbing trees! Yunyun, it is clear that you didn’t read my bestselling book, so you lose a point as an adventurer!” “I wouldn’t even have to worry about slowing it down if you hadn’t ordered us not to kill it! Does it not have any weaknesses?!” shouted Yunyun with a dagger in her right hand and a wand in her left. Burton fled to my side, smugly smirked, and said: “Allow me to take care of its weakness! Liger-type monsters can’t reach behind them with their forelegs, so if you were to pet their head, you gently would approach them from behind and—” “Megumin, get ready to cast Explosion!” “I think Beginner’s Bane–type monsters are cool, so I kind of like them, but I guess we don’t have much of a choice.” “Wait! Stop, I say!” I gave up on the idea of cutting off its tail and got into stance to cast Explosion, but Burton grabbed my wand and wouldn’t let go. Iris saw him beg me to stop and promptly dropped her sword on the ground. “Yunyun! I am going to grab it with my bare hands, so I want you to cast Light of Saber and cut off the tip of its tail! Can you do that?!” “You’re going to what?! Iris, forget that. It’s a rare monster! Kill it!” “Yunyun, wait! As a biologist, I cannot just stand here and allow you all to kill it!” Burton, refusing to give up, shook his head while clinging to Yunyun. I placed a hand on his shoulder and said: “Burton, I respect your resolution as a biologist, but is it worth risking Iris’s life to protect that liger? Would Barbera really accept a gift that you could only get your hands on because you put someone else in danger?” My expression was the epitome of seriousness. “Grrr! Grrrrrr!” The liger grew more cautious and stopped after noticing Iris throw her sword down. While the necklace was suppressing her mana, its wild instincts must have warned it. Liger-type monsters were impressively smart. “Megumin?! What are you doing?! I don’t care how poor you are. I told you to stop eating stuff you find on the ground, didn’t I?! You picked up some weird mushroom and ate it, didn’t you?!” I was trying to have a serious conversation, but Yunyun wouldn’t stop screaming. “Will you shut up?! You’re ruining our chances of persuading him! If something were to happen to Iris or that national treasure, we’re going to be the ones who are beheaded! What you need to be doing is paying him lip service so we can kill that thing!” “At least whisper if you are going to talk about me like that! But… Hmm… Yes… Barbera wouldn’t be happy if she knew I put a child in danger to get her that gem…” “Burton, you were hiding behind me for almost the entire time?! I am going to get mad if you keep treating me like a child,” stated Iris as she and the liger stared each other down. Until out of nowhere… “Scholar Iris, leave the rest to me. Here, let me borrow that necklace.” Burton took a step forward with a strong will burning in his eyes, causing Yunyun to panic and begin casting a spell. It was the familiar chant of one of her strongest spells: Light of Saber. “Burton, that necklace is a national treasure, so I don’t recommend trying to steal it and run away.” “Megumin, this is serious, so could you please not bother me right now?! Listen, everybody. I will act as a decoy, and when the liger pounces at me, I want you to cut off the tip of its tail. I am the biologist Burton. I will not allow myself to fear a monster!” ““Professor Burton!”” Although Yunyun’s and Iris’s voices were filled with admiration, Burton was trembling at the knees. “Don’t push yourself too hard. You just got your hands on a nice royalty deal and are considered an authority in your field. You’re a professor now, so how about you forget Barbera and go after someone younger instead? You’d be able to find someone in no time with your fame and money.” “What do you have against me, Megumin?! Why are you constantly taking jabs at me?!” shouted Burton as Iris handed him the necklace. Just then… “The liger is acting strange, as if something is scaring it…” The liger, which had been growling at Iris, suddenly froze. It was as if a house cat had run into an all-powerful being. “Ahhh! The necklace was suppressing my mana, so that’s probably why it’s—!” The liger jumped at the sound of Iris’s voice. “Oh yeah. You brought that magic item with you so weak monsters wouldn’t run away. I guess once you took it off…” “D-don’t be scared. It’s okay. See? I’m unarmed!” Iris smiled with her arms spread out, as if to show she didn’t have a weapon, but her efforts bore no fruit, for the liger slowly stepped back… “Then how about this?!” Burton suddenly squealed while stripping off his clothes. “Yunyun, a new rare monster has appeared. We should slay it first before it corrupts Iris.” “Okay. I was always worried he might do something to Iris, but I never expected he’d try anything here.” Yunyun and I braced ourselves for battle, but the new monster immediately began to protest, sputtering each word. “I am not joking around! This is serious! Listen, liger-type monsters take submissive positions before those stronger than they are! They get on the ground and roll over to expose their stomach and throat! If we do this, we can convince it that we’re weak so it won’t run away!” “The liger seems to be more afraid of you than it is of Iris.” The liger retreated even farther back as the professor beckoned it in only his underwear. “Did it see through my bluff?! Is my overpowering aura of absolute authority causing it to cower away?” “I’m pretty sure any monster would be cautious of a rare specimen like you, Burton.” Just then… “Light of Saber!!” “…?!” Yunyun finished casting her spell and swung her sword of light at the liger’s tail, but the cautious liger already had its guard up and managed to dodge the attack, albeit barely. “Iris, now!” “Okay! I’ve got this!” I kicked the holy sword on the ground up into the air, sending it right over to Iris, who swiftly caught it. 7 We were on our way back from the depths of the forest. It was already getting close to evening by the time the entrance came into sight. “It has gotten late. I really hope the castle hasn’t started panicking and searching for Iris.” Iris slightly twitched when I expressed my concern. “Yeah. But that’s not all we should be worried about, right?” Yunyun’s comment seemed to make Iris’s trembling even worse. “Am I making enough off royalties to pay for that necklace?” “I-I’m so sorry, everyone! I promise none of you will get into any trouble!” Iris apologized in a fluster after hearing Burton’s mutterings. “Don’t blame yourself, Iris. We all saw how the liger looked at you. Besides, you’re still just a kid. Not me, though. I wouldn’t even hesitate to blow up a loving, snuggling couple of Duxion if I had to.” “You could do with some empathy.” After catching the holy sword, Iris had started swinging it to slay the beast, but… “It was careless of me to forget that Crystal Ligers are just high-level Beginner’s Banes. Acting friendly and sweet to trick its opponent into lowering their guard and stealing the necklace was way too clever.” Liger-type monsters are known for being smart, so when it noticed Iris was hesitant to attack, it rolled on its back and started acting playful. Then, right when we let our guards down, it swiped the necklace with its mouth and took off. “It was my fault for ever wanting the gems of a Crystal Liger. Allow me to apologize to your parents, Scholar Iris. I will pay them back for the necklace. Don’t worry. They won’t get mad at you if the authority on biology and bestselling author apologizes on your behalf!” Surely, the castle royalty would get mad at this middle-aged man, though, who obviously still hadn’t realized who Iris was. Yunyun smirked bitterly. “We can’t have our client apologizing. Besides, it isn’t uncommon for adventurers to lose their equipment during a quest.” “Y-yes, I agree. Besides, I was the one who decided to take that expensive necklace with me. None of this was your fault! Yes, that’s what I will tell Father while massaging his shoulders…” Iris—who had grown especially calculating as of late, as if someone was rubbing off on her—quietly trailed off while muttering to herself. “We can worry about the necklace later. What are we going to do about Burton’s engagement ring?” ““Er…”” Iris and Yunyun quietly groaned. However… “Oh. Don’t worry about that. Look!” Burton produced an extremely tiny crystal. It was one of the crystals he’d picked up while we were tracking the Crystal Liger. “I remembered what Scholar Iris said. A thoughtful present is far better than an expensive one. While small, this crystal is something I got on my own. There is nothing more thoughtful than that…right? …N-no good?” He started off cheerful, but his words gradually lost confidence when he saw the stunned looks on our faces. I faced our anxious client… “I don’t think it’s a bad idea at all. It looks like you’re finally starting to understand women,” I said with a smile. “All right, then. Let’s get that gem made into a ring. Burton, I’m sure she’ll be ecstatic! After all, she’s going to be getting a ring made with a crystal from a monster that was said to be extinct.” Burton was mirthfully nodding in agreement with Yunyun until all of a sudden, his face turned white as a ghost. “O-oh no! Once word gets out that I found the Crystal Liger, people are going to start hunting it again!” …Oops. “Don’t worry about that beast. That scoundrel stole Iris’s necklace. There is no reason to feel sorry for it.” “N-no! I cannot allow it! The biologist inside me won’t allow it!” But… “I vaguely remember you not caring if the fabled King Toad went extinct during our last quest.” “Do not even think about comparing my dear ligers to lowly frogs.” This man… I swear… “Anyway, good luck with Barbera. Is everyone else ready to head home? We should take Iris back to the castle before it gets too late.” “Yes, I still have to tell my parents about the necklace…” “Wait! Not so fast! You have treated me so well, and I trust you all very much, so please…! Share the knowledge of the Crimson Magic Clan with me! There has to be a way I can turn this gem into a ring and still keep the Crystal Liger from being hunted!” I thought about what I could do to help as a member of the Crimson Magic Clan, despite being annoyed that Burton was clinging to me. “There is one thing you can do. You can slay the Crystal Liger yourself. That way, there wouldn’t be a monster to hunt anymore.” “Stop playing around.” Burton wore a troubled expression as he looked down at the glittering gem. I faced him and said: “Fortunately, no strong monsters showed up today, so I still have plenty of mana.” “…? What are you talking about, Megumin?” Burton curiously furrowed his brow, but Yunyun pulled a face as if she instantly knew what I meant. “D-do not even think about it! We’re right next to the capital! If you’re going to do it, then go deep into the forest first!” After hearing that, Iris apparently caught on to what we were talking about as well. “Go for it, boss! I, the princess of Belzerg, will be witness to your slaying of the Crystal Liger!” “Hmm?!” Burton let out a hysterical shriek. Yunyun wryly smirked at Iris and replied: “Iris, adventurers don’t need witnesses. The monsters we slay are recorded on our Adventurer’s Card, so…” “It’s okay!” “It is?! No, Iris! Don’t say it’s okay!” Iris sent Yunyun a carefree smile. She really had been acting like a certain somebody back at the mansion. “It seems we’re all on the same page. Now, Burton, look how hard both a princess and the greatest spell-caster of the Crimson Magic Clan are working for you. I will hunt you down myself if you mess up the proposal now.” “Uh…” Burton absentmindedly muttered to himself as his eyes were locked on Iris and had been ever since he’d let out that bizarre shriek. He was sweating profusely, which probably meant he had just realized who Iris really was. Burton’s lower lip was nervously quivering, the color in Yunyun’s face was long gone, and Iris…seemed to be somewhat excited. Showering in their gazes, I raised my wand into the air and declared, “I want each one of you to remember what I am about to say. With the help of the biologist Burton, we discovered a Crystal Liger, which was thought to have been extinct, in a forest near the capital. Hearing it was rare, I was unable to contain my desire to blow it up using my fabled Explosion spoken of in tales even in the city of Axel. The pitiful endangered species was wiped off the face of this planet, along with Iris’s necklace!” After my speech, I loudly chanted the spell, then… “Explooosion!!!” …I unleashed the powerful spell in the middle of the capital’s forest. In a small pub located in an obscure corner of the capital… …Burton was handing a ring to a beautiful woman who appeared to be the owner. We watched from afar, unable to hear their conversation, but… “Burton and Barbera look so happy.” “They really do! We don’t even need to ask him how it went!” Yunyun and Iris were right. The results spoke for themselves. So… “It’s clear they love each other but never got to communicate that until now. Look how happy they are. So how about we leave on a good note?” “You will not be leaving! We told you explosion magic was prohibited within and around the imperial capital! And now you’re telling me there was a Crystal Liger? Those things went extinct a long time ago!” The female officer, who oversaw the capital, was arresting me. She was an elite, as one would expect from someone working here, so she wasn’t going to be fooled that easily. “Burton has proof that there was a Crystal Liger! It’s small, but it’s a real crystal!” “I do not care! The fact that you cast Explosion near the capital is the problem!” To make matters worse, I couldn’t move due to depleting all my mana, and she had tied me up, so there was nothing I could do when she tightly pinched my cheeks with both hands. “Q-quit it! You’re picking on a little girl who can’t even move, and you call yourself an officer?!” “Mind your tongue! Ugh! I’d lock you up and throw away the key if Iris wasn’t with you!” After looking at Iris, who was smiling while watching over Burton, the frustrated officer began untying my rope. “You got lucky this time. That girl’s basically my underling. You would have been nothing more than rust on her Calibur if you had ended up arresting me.” “Princess Iris would never do something so absurd. Listen, you will be prohibited from entering this city if I ever catch you using explosion magic around here again,” threatened the officer. “We do not yield to any authority. Our pride as members of the Crimson Magic Clan doesn’t allow that.” “Acting like you’re tough doesn’t change a thing! Don’t use explosion magic around the capital ever again!” 8 “Okay, we’re here. I’m going to put you down. You should have recovered at least enough mana to walk on your own, right?” It was already completely dark out by the time Yunyun carried me back to the mansion. “I’m glad everything went well for Burton.” “We didn’t end on a good note, though. Why am I the only one who had to get yelled at?” Claire had scolded us when we took Iris back to the castle. After that, Lain had scolded us as well. Then… “Everyone at the castle was mad at you.” Yes. From maids to butlers, guards to random old guys—countless different people had scolded me while expressing concern as well. The princess did get home late, so I suppose it made sense, but… “But why do I have to be yelled at for something that Iris did on her own? I didn’t even invite her. Plus, we only lost one national treasure. Big deal.” “We should probably be grateful that they only got mad at us after what happened,” commented Yunyun. I didn’t know how to describe it. All the adventures I had gone on lately were fun, but they weren’t exactly what I was after. I didn’t want to hold back. I wanted to… “Besides, you’re our party’s leader, right? It’s your job to take responsibility when something happens.” Yunyun was teasing me for a change, which was rare for her. “There is absolutely nothing good about being the party’s leader. All it is is hard work.” “I—I wouldn’t mind being the party leader if you really don’t like it that much… I mean, I am a candidate for the next village chief, so I need to start practicing being a leader…” I was annoyed watching Yunyun fidget with hope in her eyes. “Anyway, how will we invite Iris on adventures now? Monsters are going to start avoiding us everywhere we go without that necklace to suppress her mana.” “Iris seemed kind of sad to say good-bye at the castle as well. I wish there was something we could do, but… Anyway, about me being the leader…” Iris kept telling everyone that I had defeated the Crystal Liger, so that wasn’t a problem. But the national treasure—the necklace—was still gone. We could invite her on an adventure if we were fighting something extremely powerful that wouldn’t run away even after sensing her strong mana, but… “We wouldn’t be able to get that necklace back ourselves.” Iris, Yunyun, and I were far too specialized for battle, so we couldn’t do much else. We would need someone who could search, track, and give sound orders. Most importantly, we needed… “Is it just me, or is this party way too disorganized?” “Says the biggest troublemaker in the party. Don’t act like this has nothing to do with you.” It was clear as day that even the most powerful and smartest party leader in the world wouldn’t be able to make it work when the only other party members were an overprotected princess and a lonely girl with no friends. “Why are you looking at me and sighing? Can you not see you’re part of the problem?” It finally hit me over these past few adventures without Kazuma. I preferred destroying to giving orders. “…Kazuma must have it rough.” She could say that again. Darkness not only had a weird fetish, but none of her attacks ever connected. Aqua had the worst luck and was great at messing things up. You couldn’t take your eyes off her for a second without her doing something she shouldn’t. Kazuma probably always had something to worry about, since he had two troublemakers in his group. I guess I was just going to have to carry their dead weight and back him up. “Anyway, it has gotten late. I’m going to ask Kazuma for help tomorrow morning, but first, I have to tell everyone about what happened today. I’m sure he’ll help us. If you ignore his faults, he’s actually a nice guy deep down inside.” “…Kazuma really has it rough. It doesn’t help that the biggest troublemakers always believe they’re the most useful.” I had no idea what Yunyun was babbling about as she looked at the mansion with a sympathetic hue in her eyes, but… “I’m home.” …I opened the door to the mansion to tell everyone about my adventure today.
Chapter 26
21 min read