Our meeting with Lyser, the king of Noura, happened a lot faster than expected. To our surprise, a royal messenger came to our inn a mere two days after we gave the guard our letter. That was a little more than expedited.
“Murdock had already gained an audience with him. The king was so very happy to hear of my father’s and your bravery, Sir Eiji, that he had been wanting to see us,” Ruey informed us, after speaking with the messenger.
Way to go, Mister Murdock! He had managed to perform in the palace when his troupe arrived. I bet they made a fortune in tips. I planned to have him buy me a meal when I saw him. If they were still in Nourn, that is.
“I told the messenger that we will come to the palace tomorrow.”
“Hm? Why not today, Ruey?”
The sun was still high. While I couldn’t tell accurate time without my Chronograph, it was definitely before noon. I didn’t understand why we would wait until the next day.
“I thought it might be necessary for us to clean ourselves up a bit.”
“Oof...”
Right. I was dressed like any poor adventurer just starting out on his career. Definitely not the kind of look you want when going to see the king.
“Why don’t we take the opportunity to go to a barber, Sir Eiji?”
“Ooh, good idea,” I agreed as I played with the ends of my hair, which had grown a decent amount. Nearly three months had passed since I arrived in this world; three months without a single haircut. I had only been shaving by grazing my cheeks with a knife too. I was not well-kept by any means.
We had soap with us, but it didn’t lather like a bar of soap in modern Japan. It was just congealed charcoal and animal fat anyway. It didn’t even smell good. Apparently, a rudimentary form of soap was first used in 3000 B.C.E., coincidentally invented both in ancient Rome and Mesopotamia around the same time. And, by the eighth century, ‘soap maker’ had become a profession. According to Tiamat, of course!
In any case, I couldn’t deny that I hadn’t paid much mind to my appearance since arriving in this world. I couldn’t lick myself clean like Baze or Hieronymus.
“Mm. You do need to at least keep yourself presentable. Not only when meeting royalty, but anyone.”
With that Tiamat sent us off, after making plans to meet up later and get decent clothes. Of course, we weren’t talking luxuries like made-to-order stuff from tailors. We weren’t nobles or tycoons. Just like many commoners, all we needed were touched-up second-hand wear. Not that those were very cheap either.
It may be well-known that haircuts used to be performed by surgeons. Barber surgeons, they were called. Their red, white, and blue pole used to represent blood, bandages, and the veins, respectively.
Feeling refreshed after a haircut and a shave, Ruey and I met up with the rest of the party and took a walk around the streets of Nourn.
“You look more manly now,” Tiamat said.
“Are you falling for me all over again?”
“Not that I ever fell for your looks to begin with. There’s no newfound love just because you became 1.12 times manlier.”
“How precise of you! What’s with the decimal point?!”
“It’s an approximation.”
“What’s that in math, again?”
Sorry, I was the opposite of a math major.
“Not the perfectly accurate number, but an approximate number that is close enough to be used in its place,” Leon answered.
Yeah? Well, I still didn’t get it.
“...Like pi.”
“Oh.”
The example helped a lot. I learned to represent pi as 3.14, but pi is indivisible. Since it wouldn’t have been efficient to calculate hundreds and thousands of digits, we settled on 3.14 for convenience. Which means that my manliness was boosted about 1.12 times through the haircut, ignoring all the digits after the hundredth that make the rate indivisible.
Wait. That was really a strange amount. Was the base product so bad that it improved a little over 10% from just a haircut? Or was 12% the best I could improve my looks, despite my efforts? As I sank into despair...
“Weido,” Leon said, with a little laugh.
In any case, we bought our clothes.
“What is with that lackluster description?”
“I mean, nothing noteworthy happened.”
We just bought clothes that looked decent enough and changed into them. If I was some beautiful young lady, a scene in the dressing room might have had an audience. But who wanted an inside look of a man in his thirties picking out clothes?
“There’s no fun in that.”
“Utility over looks when it comes to adventuring.”
Like a military uniform. It wasn’t something fashionable, but only needed to be functional and useful.
“On the other hand, your outfit is on point, Sir Eiji. No one would guess that you’re an F... Oh, excuse me.”
Ruey caught himself, much, much too late.
“Mm. Doesn’t look at all like someone who can barely swing a sword.”
Et tu, Tiamat?
“He had a knack for fashion back in the Dragon Realm, too. Didn’t expect that, did you?”
“Weirdo.”
In the midst of the jeering, Baze alone refrained from any comments, but I figured that was only because he lacked interest. He was chewing on some skewers he had bought along the way.
“The military uniform is the water main of all men’s fashion. Utility is the superior style.”
Back in Japan, I had just incorporated a little military element into my outfit to make it a lot more fashionable. Now I simply did the same with adventurer gear. I included a few adventurer items in my ordinary street clothes, like a leather vest and a dagger on my belt. Dressing like some master adventurer would never have suited me well, anyway.
“You don’t look trained, but there’s no flaw in your outfit. It exudes this quiet confidence. Anyone would take you for a skilled adventurer.”
“Just on the outside,” I chuckled at Ruey’s compliment.
I wasn’t a master in disguise, unfortunately. With no surprise factor or trick up my sleeve, I was a fresh rookie. With just one movement in combat I’d be found out.
“Negotiations require a little visual aid. In that sense, our battle has already begun,” Tiamat said.
Not being underestimated was pretty important. The dialogue wouldn’t even begin if he disregards us as some peasants or something. That’s why we had Leon buy an outfit too. Nothing over the top, but just a simple, clean outfit. Since Tiamat and Baze were transformed with a spell, they didn’t need any new clothes.
“I feel like we should bring something, but there’s nothing we can buy that we could gift to the king.”
We could actually be considered disrespectful for bringing anything unworthy. I find it often ignored in fantasy pieces, but disrespecting royalty was a serious crime. One punishable by death. I mean, if an office worker disrespected the owner of the company in Japan, he’d get fired. Same kind of thing.
I recalled a work of fiction where an entire clan was massacred because one of them committed the disrespect of not kneeling before the king, enraging him. But, even in modern-day Japan, you didn’t really have a place in society if you couldn’t show etiquette when it mattered.
“Mm. Etiquette is also said to be a mask that covers one’s true emotions. Putting on a different persona to match the situation is a skill required of all adults in human society. I am thou, and thou art I.”
“Per...”
I began to strike a peculiar pose as Tiamat finished. I could have used some funky jazz in the background.
“Is that really how an adult should act in Japan?”
Leon was watching me with a shade of pity.