Looking at the weapon that suddenly appeared in Daoist Shanqing's hand, Lin Li blinked innocently.
System, system, let me ask, can [Wall of the Soul] block damage derived from the physical body to the soul?
It seems I'm about to set sail on a long journey.
But it's fine. I heard that when people jump off a building, they recall their entire lives. Even if I really get beaten to amnesia, I can just jump off a building to solve the problem.
"Ah? No, haha, accidentally got the shape wrong."
Seeing that Lin Li noticed, Daoist Shanqing waved his hand, and the spiked club turned into a back scratcher. He held it and scratched his back, laughing.
Lin Li: "..."
Old man, you better have gotten it wrong.
But since it was already exposed, Lin Li simply opened the skylight to speak brightly, directly took out his phone and handed it to Daoist Shanqing, speaking straightforwardly:
"However, Grandpa... if you want to watch, just watch. Don't ask Bufan either. Even if Bufan could break the law, he couldn't help you find it, because you haven't downloaded it on your phone at all.
I didn't expect you to really be curious about this.
But it's fine, I have it on my phone, you can watch it now. Here, the ones I chose to keep even if they take up memory space are all masterpieces in my personal opinion. You should be satisfied."
It really didn't matter.
What's wrong with watching porn? What decent person doesn't watch porn? Are those who don't watch porn decent people?
Watching porn is a noble act.
Moreover, Daoist Shanqing had always been an old urchin figure in Lin Li's eyes, so... his image wasn't even ruined.
What's wrong with Master Roshi liking to watch this?
As long as he's not a Master Roshi who makes money for his wife to let her have fun with male cosplayers and male fitness coaches, Lin Li can accept it.
"Sigh."
Hearing this, Daoist Shanqing sighed, smiling bitterly with some embarrassment:
"It's not that I really want to watch. I've cultivated my whole life after all. If I were addicted to these superficial desires, I absolutely couldn't have reached this step and entered the Tribulation Crossing stage."
"My Dao companion and I were both more obsessed with seeking the Dao our whole lives."
"It's just that Grandpa is indeed curious about this kind of thing.
The direction of my curiosity is different from what you imagine. I have heard of dual cultivation methods and bizarre techniques, but the cultivation world mostly uses jade slips to record them, and they are all boring ink-painted diagrams and texts of meridian circulation.
As for the form and content of this living erotica in the present world, I am very curious... whether it can be as detailed as those documentaries.
Plus, you only showed the beginning and then skipped it before, which really makes one itch... Sigh, my face has ultimately paid the price for this."
"Grandpa, I know, you don't need to explain, it's fine." Lin Li smiled upon hearing this.
He could tell that Daoist Shanqing wasn't just being stubborn.
Lin Li could also understand.
Just like Lin Li didn't want acquaintances to see him whipping people with a dildo, but he really wanted to experience the joy of whipping people with a dildo.
Under Lin Li's repeated invitations, Daoist Shanqing finally took the phone and saw the content behind the Crown Casino that he had been longing for.
It made his eyebrows twitch and twitch and twitch again.
"The performance is not bad..." After watching for a while, fast-forwarding and dragging the progress bar, the old man was indeed purely appreciating it. He nodded and gave a fair evaluation:
"If this could circulate in the cultivation world, it might be regarded as a supreme treasure by the Hehuan demon cultivators. Based on this, they could remove the final cover and develop evil arts to capture people's hearts."
The final cover refers to mosaics.
After all, the island nation's domestic films require cavalry (censorship). Experienced captains will find that island nation infantry (uncensored) films basically have an FBI warning at the beginning. That is one of the signs of genius publishers registering companies abroad for filming and production, and then "exporting for domestic sale."
"Thank you, Lin Li, this is enough."
Not long after watching, Daoist Shanqing returned the phone to Lin Li and let out a long sigh.
The curiosity in his heart finally landed.
"Grandpa, next time I come, should I bring you some materials or items related to this?" Lin Li blinked and asked, "You don't need to be polite with me."
"This is really unnecessary!" Daoist Shanqing waved his hands repeatedly.
If one day those two friends woke up and saw those things next to him.
When they figured out what they were used for, his life would be considered lived in vain.
"True. By the way, Grandpa, can you mold things yourself?" Lin Li nodded, but asked curiously: "At what level of cultivation can one arbitrarily condense spiritual energy into a physical entity like you?"
"To condense pure spiritual energy into a 'flesh and blood' 'physical entity', one must at least be at the late stage of Nascent Soul."
As Daoist Shanqing spoke, he waved his hand. Following the motion of his hand, spiritual energy formed a woman appearing in front of Lin Li.
"Fuck! Teacher Rion!" It took Lin Li two seconds to recognize her identity, sorry, officer, you're wearing clothes now, I really didn't recognize you.
Teacher, come back and continue filming, the industry needs you!
"Molding is possible, but it's ultimately just an appearance, not an independent individual. Everything comes from my fantasy, and all actions are controlled by me. Since it's a fantasy, why bother."
Daoist Shanqing smiled, then his expression turned teasing:
"Lin Li, if you want to do that kind of thing to this body, hehe, you can try. As long as you can accept that the core inside the body is me, the feelings produced by your touch and caress also come from my... imagination."
"...Absolutely no thoughts."
Fuck, I went limp.
If Wang Ze were here, it would be a double blessing for him.
"Alright, Lin Li, let's talk about serious business. For example, why did you come back so early this time? Did you encounter any problems?"
Daoist Shanqing didn't plan to continue chatting on this topic. He stepped forward, took the food Lin Li brought him, and asked.
If Lin Li hadn't come back so early this time, he wouldn't have been discovered.
Strange, why are there so many of these foods called 'enoki mushrooms' in the takeout brought this time.
"It's like this, Grandpa. My divine ability gave me a task, asking me to comprehend the mystery of the five elements and temper myself with the power of the five elements. Can you help me?
I'm now using the 'Thunder Nurturing Seed' for tempering, and I've already gained something in the wood element, but I have no clue about the other four elements."
Lin Li nodded upon hearing this, telling the old man the core purpose of his visit this time.
"Thunder arts and wind arts are indeed considered variants of the wood attribute. It's reasonable that the 'Thunder Nurturing Seed' can be considered wood element tempering." Daoist Shanqing nodded upon hearing this, "No problem."
"I have dabbled in all these spells. Although I'm not proficient in any of them, and I lack auxiliary items now, it's more than enough to temper a Qi Condensation cultivator like you."
Daoist Shanqing nodded, and the spiritual energy of heaven and earth began to gather towards him. The originally pure white spiritual energy, after entering the old man's body and coming out again, had taken on different colors.
Lin Li was shocked. Daoist Shanqing lost his color!!
What kind of inferior product is this, does it have a production license?
"Lin Li, these are the incantations and key points." Daoist Shanqing wrote swiftly, and then the paper flew towards Lin Li, "Later, cooperating with this, the tempering effect will be better."
"Memorized it, Grandpa." Lin Li looked at it for a while, memorized it, and looked up.
"Good, then let's begin. Which element do you want to start with?" Daoist Shanqing asked.
"Any is fine, metal, wood, water, fire, earth, then let's go with metal."
"Good, focus your mind and start forming the hand seals."
Daoist Shanqing nodded, pointed a finger at Lin Li, and the golden spiritual energy around him instantly surged towards Lin Li.
Lin Li only felt thousands of golden needles suddenly piercing into every pore of his body. The sharp aura of metal wantonly roamed through his meridians, his skin tightened inch by inch, and his internal organs trembled with a buzzing sound.
Fuck your mom, it hurts so much, I can't do it, I can't do it!!
Oh my dear mother!
So this is the kind of suffering those fantasy male protagonists endure every day? Fuck, I don't dare to imagine how much blood and tears are hidden behind those understated words in novels like 'perseverance', 'severe pain', and 'suffering beyond ordinary human endurance'.
The author writes a few words easily, but the protagonist really suffers a lot.
Lin Li barked like a dog crazily in his heart, but still gritted his teeth and circulated the spell, letting this violent spiritual energy gallop in his body—he was just using this method to relieve the pain.
If these fantasy male protagonists can do it, I, Lin Li, can do it too!
Lin Li looked at the system.
Daoist Shanqing nodded at this time: "Lin Li, I will slowly increase the force. If you can't hold on, just…"
Lin Li: "I can't hold on ahhhhh! Grandpa! I really can't do it!"
Daoist Shanqing: "(；☉_☉)?"
You actually said it?
The few disciples I taught in my past life usually preferred to be tempered until they fainted rather than give up, right?
This child's temperament and willpower...
"Grandpa, I don't know why, but my divine ability didn't recognize this kind of tempering." Lin Li looked up and continued shouting.
—Lin Li wasn't purely unable to hold on, but when he glanced at the system from the corner of his eye and found that the progress bar for "Metal" in the task was stably at zero, his spirit instantly deflated.
"Hmm?" Seeing this result, Daoist Shanqing withdrew all the metal spiritual energy and voiced his confusion:
"No effect?"
"Yeah, the divine ability doesn't recognize it."
"I see, then I'll try another method?"
"Okay, Grandpa."
"No."
"No."
"Still no."
...
Although a man shouldn't say no, and a woman shouldn't say don't, many times things go contrary to one's wishes.
"Strange, why is this? Lin Li, I've tried all the tempering methods I can think of right now. Is your divine ability this picky?
Or is there some error in what you described to me? Can you ask your divine ability?"
Daoist Shanqing asked with a face full of confusion.
The two of them had just changed several postures and positions, and also used spiritual energy of different attributes to fill Lin Li like a cream puff, but none of it had any effect.
"My divine ability is a stupid cunt, asking it is useless."
Lin Li shook his head and cursed the system, then thought of a possibility: "Wait a minute, Grandpa, let me test something."
He materialized the "Thunder Nurturing Seed" and tested it.
Lin Li sighed: "Grandpa, I might know where the problem lies."
"It should be that the divine ability requires me to complete this task in my present world."
Just now, using the "Thunder Nurturing Seed" for tempering, it was exactly the same process as in class not long ago, but the "Wood" progress bar didn't move at all.
The only difference between the two was the world.
Can tasks activated in a certain world only be completed in that world?
But the old man's happiness task was triggered in the cultivation world, yet when I'm in reality, it doesn't hinder its progress bar from moving forward.
Because the old man has always been in the cultivation world?
Lin Li couldn't be certain, but he couldn't find any other suitable explanation.
He could only say, all rights of interpretation belong to the system, fuck the small fry system's mom!
"Can only be completed in your world?" Daoist Shanqing frowned again upon hearing this:
"It's normal for divine abilities to have restrictions. Since that's the case, I'll teach you the method of attribute conversion. You can refine it yourself in the present world, and then temper yourself?
Although the efficiency will be much worse this way, for the efficacy of your divine ability, spending a little more time is worth it."
"Okay," Lin Li nodded, "Thank you, Grandpa."
"A small matter, not worth mentioning."
Putting the paper with the method back into the "Universe Ring", although the main purpose of this visit had failed, time couldn't be wasted.
He couldn't just go back like this, so Lin Li and the old man returned to their respective tracks. Lin Li cultivated his own, and the old man played his own.
...
[Task 4 has been completed]
[You have received rewards: Physique Improvement: Dao Heart Stabilized; Random System-oriented Item 1; System Currency 100.]
Lin Li, who was absorbing spiritual energy to cultivate, was interrupted by the system's message.
It was about the same as his previous estimate.
Not long before returning to reality, Task 4 was completed.
[You have obtained "Half-Price Item Purchase Opportunity" 1]
Another half-price coupon.
Not bad, if he's lucky it's worth a few hundred system currency. He can use it when he refreshes a useful high-priced item someday.
[Happiness has been found, fun has been obtained. The old man's gloom has dissipated because of your arrival, and he already treats you as his own. Companionship is the longest confession of love, keep up the good work!]
[Task Triggered!]
[Task 4: Continue to spend more time with the old man, let the old man feel warmth.]
[Task Reward: Physique Improvement: Fire Resistance increased by 50%; Random System-oriented Item 1; System Currency 100.]
And a new task popped up at this time.
This time it was no longer fun and happiness, the goal became warmth.
The indicator was also a progress bar.
"Warmth?"
Lin Li frowned, not at the task, but…
"Why the fuck does the warmth task reward fire resistance? What kind of fucking warmth is this?" Lin Li couldn't help but complain.
After thinking about it, Lin Li temporarily stopped what he was doing and came to Daoist Shanqing's side.
"Click."
Hearing the sound, Daoist Shanqing, who was originally immersed in the game, turned his head and saw Lin Li using a flamethrower to burn his own wrist, equipped in the wilderness survival kit placed in the cultivation world.
Daoist Shanqing: "?"
Lin Li: "?"
—The task progress bar really started moving.
Is it really this simple and crude kind of warmth?
"Lin Li, what are you..." Daoist Shanqing's body naturally wouldn't fear this kind of flame, so he didn't even bother to move, just asked in confusion.
"Nothing, Grandpa." Lin Li waved his hand and sighed.
System, I really need to control you.
If Daoist Shanqing were really an ordinary old man, wouldn't he be warmed to death by me?
Eh, this fucking task keeps mentioning inheritance, could the ultimate goal of the task be to burn the old man to death.
Feel the warmth - a small urn is also great - get the inheritance.
—Lin Li was speculating about the system with the greatest malice.
But it didn't matter. Since this could increase the progress, then this task was quite easy to complete. It wasn't realistic to keep pressing the flamethrower himself. Next time he came, he would just bring some convenient 'warmth'.
"Grandpa Shanqing, I have to go again. It will be quite a while before I come next time. You can rest assured and do what you want to do." Therefore, putting the lighter back next to the bag, Lin Li said goodbye and left.
"Okay."
"Do you really not need me to bring you a fleshlight or a doll?" Lin Li didn't forget his original intention.
"No need!!"
A white light flashed, and Lin Li returned to his bedroom.
He materialized the "Thunder Nurturing Seed" and absorbed it. Sure enough, the task progress bar started moving forward again.
This task could only be completed in reality.
So Lin Li took out the method Daoist Shanqing gave him and immediately started cultivating.
Time passed.
"Still not working?" Lin Li frowned.
After finally condensing the spiritual energy of the other four elements, and accumulating it to a certain extent, when it could achieve the so-called tempering effect and was used on himself, Lin Li began to temper.
But until this bit of spiritual energy was completely absorbed by his body, the progress bar still didn't change, staying where it was.
"Seek the power of the five elements..."
Lin Li continued to look at the task description:
"Does it have to be found from the outside world? The five elements generated by my body's secondary transformation in reality won't work? Or is the cultivation method Daoist Shanqing gave me just not meeting the system's requirements? Is it like this regardless of whether I'm in the cultivation world or not?"
"Then how do I find the power of the five elements in reality, and also temper myself?"
"I can't just go watch GG Bond and feel the power of the five elements of the Five Spirit King, right?"
Lin Li stopped talking to himself. Wait, this abstract system, maybe it really works.
So Lin Li's eyes lit up, and he walked towards the bedroom.
Watched an episode.
Useless, the system wasn't abstract enough.
And Lin Li, full of anger, raised his middle finger at the computer screen.
Teacher Mi Hu, let me ask you something.
The more I watch, the angrier I get. Why distribute the power of the Five Spirits to those other useless things! The Five Spirit King only recognizes GG Bond!
GG Bond finally leveled up five challenger accounts, and ended up letting those four pigs play them down to bronze. Teacher Mi Hu, you account-stealing dog!
I think you're really senile! You've lived all these years as a pig!!
After patting Chen Yuying's wooden fish head to calm down, Lin Li still had to figure out how to complete the task.
"The concept of the power of the five elements from the cultivation world definitely doesn't exist in reality. Then I'll first find the so-called five elements and consider extending from them."
"Metal, wood, water, fire, earth. Wood doesn't need to be worried about, leaving metal, water, fire, and earth."
Lin Li opened the cabinet, took out that huge piece of gold, and then hugged it and started doing squats.
This piece of gold that a normal person couldn't pick up, Lin Li could now easily hold, but without turning on [Charge], doing standard squats for a long time would still make him tired.
It went up.
When Lin Li felt tired, "Metal" showed movement, extremely small, but there was indeed progress.
From nothing to something, from zero to one, the fatigue was swept away, and Lin Li was a bit excited.
This direction was correct.
Putting away the gold, Lin Li returned to the bathroom.
Lin Li's house was an old building, so the shower room in the bathroom wasn't a separate space partitioned by a glass door, but an integrated shower room placed directly against the wall.
You had to step over to get in, and the bottom was like a mini bathtub.
The water heater hadn't been turned on yet, but it didn't matter. Lin Li took off his clothes and walked right in.
In mid-November, the feeling of cold water instantly hitting his whole body gave Lin Li goosebumps.
Looking at the very, very small but indeed advancing progress of "Water", Lin Li punched the air and adjusted the showerhead knob to make the water flow more rapid.
The speed didn't change much.
Lin Li's excitement also quickly cooled down.
At this speed, it would probably take ten or so months of continuous cold showers to complete the progress.
The gold squats just now were the same, he'd probably have to squat and hug it continuously for a few months.
This speed was too slow.
When the bottom of the shower room filled with water, Lin Li sat down, buried his head in the water, and held his breath.
The speed increased slightly.
"Then swimming?"
Seeing this result, Lin Li immediately made an association. Guessing is worse than experimenting. He packed up, took his gear, and went downstairs.
Naturally, there was no swimming pool downstairs in this crappy community. Lin Li went to the swimming pool at the Nansang Sports Center.
To be honest, many communities claim to have supporting swimming pools, but most of the time, the pools have no water.
In this regard, we really need to look up to foreign countries. Lin Li heard that the swimming pool on the Titanic is still full of water to this day. This is the spirit of craftsmanship.
...
There are so many perverts in the swimming pool.
As soon as he entered the locker room, Lin Li saw someone taking off their clothes right in front of him, as if they were oblivious to the world.
Because he had an appointment with Coach Yu to log driving practice hours, Lin Li just simply swam several laps in the fifty-meter pool without resting.
Swimming is quite tiring.
But the good news is that the progress of "Water" has increased. The harder he works, the more standard his movements are, and the more he exerts himself, the faster the progress will be.
This means his direction should be correct.
Although it's still not fast, it's not slow either. If he comes to swim a few more times, "Water" should be fine. A harsher environment might make the speed even faster.
Walking out of the swimming pool, Lin Li was about to call a car to leave when he noticed the construction site next to him out of the corner of his eye, the sports center here was under construction.
Moving metal belongs to the trial of "Metal", so moving bricks should also be considered the tempering of "Earth", right?
...
It indeed was.
Shaking off some dust from his body, Lin Li returned to the intersection to wait for a car.
He had just borrowed a hard hat from a worker and mingled in for some 'work' to test it out, verifying this conclusion.
But Lin Li hadn't figured out the logic of the task yet, with the same amount of fatigue, the progress of "Earth" was several times that of "Metal".
Now, the only one with absolutely no progress was "Fire".
To be honest.
Xiling people are quite lacking in manners.
Lin Li just called the funeral parlor, his language was very polite, very polite indeed, asking if they accepted orders to burn living people, and ended up being called a big idiot.
"Bro." The funeral parlor was too disappointing, but fortunately, Lin Li found a fire element nearby, so he walked towards a guy next to him.
"Eh, what's up?" The man turned his head upon hearing this.
"Are you almost done smoking?" Lin Li asked.
"Ah?" The man looked around first. Although he didn't find out if this was a non-smoking area, he still apologized to Lin Li: "You can't inhale secondhand smoke, right? Sorry, sorry."
Fuck, Xiling people are still too polite.
But Lin Li waved his hand: "No, I'm not asking about that. I just have a favor I'd like you to help with."
"What favor? Tell me, I'm free now." The man smiled brightly.
"If you're almost done smoking, can you use the cigarette butt to burn my butt?" Lin Li asked sincerely.
Man: "(；゜○゜)!?"
Fuck, Xiling people are still too perverted.
(End of Chapter)