"What did the teacher call you guys for?" When Lin Li returned to the classroom, before he even reached his seat, Bai Bufan immediately couldn't help but ask.
"Yeah." Lin Li nodded:
"We men are having an orgy together, the Class Rep was called over to keep watch at the door, she's not participating."
Bai Bufan pointed at Lin Li, speechless and teasing.
Specifically excluding Chen Yuying before making a dirty joke, this is Lin Li's attention to detail.
He really is a dog, crying to death.
"Then are you a top or a bottom (1 or 0)." Bai Bufan followed up and asked.
Lin Li: "θ."
"What is 'theta'? A new vocabulary word?" Bai Bufan was stunned by this new answer, not quite understanding.
"In a multiplayer orgy, how can you distinguish between top and bottom? At that time, I had someone in front of me and someone behind me, acting as both a 1 and a 0. Combining them, I'm a θ." Lin Li explained.
Bai Bufan: "..."
Lin Li is a genius.
"Awesome." Bai Bufan pressed his fist against his forehead, lowered his head trying not to laugh out loud, then shook his head and sighed: "My god, a human centipede. You gays really disgust me."
"Then next time, just don't take it so deep." Lin Li shrugged:
"Bufan, why do you always blame others? Can't you look for problems within yourself? Have you worked hard all these years? Have your oral skills improved? Is seventy-nine centimeters very long? You can't even swallow that?"
Bai Bufan: "(；☉_☉)!?"
"Fuck! That's not what I meant! I don't mean disgusting in a physical sense! I mean disgusting in a psychological sense!!"
By the time he realized what words had entered his ears, it was already too late, and Bai Bufan retorted.
And, seventy-nine centimeters, even a fucking manga dick isn't that long!
"Fuck, how did you put these words together?"
"So you mean you're not physically disgusted, that's saying no but meaning yes. You're also a female brat, right? Meeting an older man, 'small fry, small fry'~~ but when the older man comes in, you're still 'small fry, small fry'~~"
Lin Li mocked.
"Who taught you to understand it like this, really a buzzkill." Bai Bufan scolded with a smile, then elbowed Lin Li: "Alright, enough joking, leave some gay jokes for Wang Ze to play with. Tell me, what exactly did Old Jian call you guys for?"
"Nothing much, just asked if we wanted to participate in a math competition with low competition content. If you want to participate, I can help you talk to Xue Jian. Anyway, it doesn't cost money. As long as you really want to go, Xue Jian will definitely agree."
There was nothing to hide, so Lin Li briefly explained.
"Boring." Hearing this, Bai Bufan shivered, his eyes instantly returning to calm. He shook his head, looked deeply at the sky, and continued to observe the celestial phenomena at night.
Hmm, it's still night.
But Lin Li frowned tightly.
"No? Bai Bufan, if it's boring, it's boring, why the fuck did you shiver?" Recalling the scene just now, Lin Li really couldn't stand it, and frowned and questioned.
"Oh oh, you mean this. It's a conditioned reflex. Haven't you heard of Pavlov's dog experiment? Because every time I shivered at night before, it would become boring, so now when I feel bored, I shiver.
You don't even understand this, what a country bumpkin. I think you're the small fry." Bai Bufan had his own reasons, despising Lin Li's ignorance.
Lin Li blinked upon hearing this, and handed Bai Bufan a piece of tissue.
Bai Bufan understood, took it, wiped his belly through his clothes, and even said thank you.
Wiping the belly first? It seems Bufan usually lies down to go to the Taoist temple, a lazy Taoist.
But Lin Li approved of this action: "Reasonable."
"I thought it was something else, turns out it's this kind of activity for you smart people, boring," putting the tissue in the drawer, Bai Bufan shook his head, then couldn't help but sigh:
"Lin Li, tell me, the Olympics have the Paralympics, why don't competitions have a retard competition? Isn't this unfair?"
Lin Li just sneered upon hearing this, didn't speak, and looked at Bai Bufan with the eyes of looking at a retard.
Facing this look, Bai Bufan got angry, narrowed his eyes and questioned:
"Lin Li, let me ask you, is a weak acid an acid?"
"Eh? Wait a…"
"Don't talk nonsense, wait for what, I'm asking you, is a weak acid an acid! Answer yes or no!" Bai Bufan interrupted Lin Li's speech and questioned.
"Fuck, yes." Already knowing how Bai Bufan was going to ask, Lin Li, who had excellent chemistry grades, covered his face and admitted with a smile.
"Is a weak base a base!"
"Yes."
"Then answer me now, is a retard (ruo zhi) a wise person (zhi), look in my ass! Answer me!"
"Yes!"
"Then why can't there be a retard competition? Now, immediately apologize to all retards!" Bai Bufan's words became more and more impassioned, and the students in the front row turned their heads to look several times.
But they were also used to the bb-ing of these two in the back row. When they had nothing to do on weekdays, they would even eavesdrop.
Just treat it as listening to cross talk.
Lin Li was convinced, his fingers twisting the hem of his clothes, his knuckles turning white from exertion, because he felt that if he didn't do something, he would be crushed by self-blame, guilt, and regret, so he immediately stood up.
Walking to Zhou Baowei's side, Lin Li bowed deeply, shedding tears: "I'm sorry, Baowei!"
Seeing this scene, Bai Bufan was deeply moved, also stood up and stood shoulder to shoulder with Lin Li: "I'm also sorry, Baowei!"
Zhou Baowei: "?"
With a chuckle, Zhou Baowei reached his hand towards his nostril: "Two idiots, I really have to secretly smear boogers on the top of your drawers. Just wait, one day when you suddenly touch a dried raisin, that will be my gift to you."
"Fuck, Zhou Baowei, why are you so bad!"
"I'm sorry, this time I'm really sorry, bro."
...
Night.
Lin Li rode his bike to Laoyou Road again.
The purpose was not fishing, and now he couldn't fish in Xiling.
Although Task 3 was aborted midway due to the rectification of Laoyou Road, it didn't matter. Uncle Yan's reach could extend to Laoyou Road, but not outside Xiling.
The task requirement was within Nansang, not just Xiling. And Xiling was already considered one of the best towns in Nansang economically. Public security and economy are somewhat linked, so as long as he went fishing in other towns on weekend nights, he could still catch something.
But this would be more troublesome, so before the task deadline, it was only a backup plan.
Tonight's purpose was the same as last night's, to expand social connections… get to know some social youths, social middle-aged men, and social old men.
There must still be non-sexual evil deeds happening in Xiling that meet the task requirements… gambling, picking quarrels and provoking trouble, theft, fraud, pyramid schemes. These common types could all be happening, it's just that he completely didn't know and had no way of knowing.
And judging from the experience of clearing the Hehuan Sect task, at this time, he needed an insider to guide him.
Lin Li's own social circle couldn't get to know these people wandering in the gray area, and these illegal acts were different from "yellow" (pornography), which is considered human nature in the eyes of men.
It was impossible for someone like Song Luping to proactively share.
So, Lin Li's current plan was to take a detour and first get to know a few students from vocational high schools and technical schools.
They like to mix and play, and definitely know more about this than he does.
First get to know the social youths, and then use them to get to know the social middle-aged men and old men.
Rashly approaching the middle-aged and old men could easily lead to trouble.
Even if the youths haven't made a name for themselves and don't know about things outside the school, they must know something about some of the egregious acts happening inside their schools.
Bullying and violence on campus, Lin Li believed, should also be considered evil deeds recognized by the system… after all, there is no Minor Animal Protection Law in the cultivation world, evil is evil.
Although it was still a guess, he might as well try it first, there was nothing to lose.
And after planting a few social undercover agents, even if this task was completed, being well-informed was definitely not a bad thing. If there were any situations or fun things happening in these places in the future, he could also go and take a look.
Maybe it could even trigger some other system tasks.
Of course, although the plan was set, implementation still had certain difficulties.
After all, you can't find a group of undercover agents. Who knows if they consider others as their own people? If one person is unwilling, then everyone is unwilling. He could only ask people who were alone.
But late at night, there are very few people wandering around here who are alone and look like students, which filtered out a large wave.
But Lin Li was very Buddhist about it.
Tonight he just planned to stroll around the vicinity of a few schools here. If he couldn't find a target, so be it. Last night, because he couldn't find a suitable target, he just went straight home after strolling a bit.
But perhaps people won't always have no harvest. Tonight was different from last night. After walking for a few minutes, Lin Li saw a group of people laughing and joking, parting ways at an intersection.
A few of them were wearing school uniforms.
At this moment, two of them each walked towards a different road alone.
Quite coincidentally, one was walking towards him, and looked quite sharp. Lin Li simply waited in place.
When the other party approached, Lin Li stepped forward, took out a few RMB notes in his hand, and spoke gently: "Bro, can we chat? I have a favor to ask, paid, long-term."
"Hmm? Me." Hearing the voice, the other party turned his head to look at Lin Li and responded.
"Yes…"
Then in the next second, before Lin Li could finish his sentence, his pupils quaked, and he pulled his legs and ran back towards the intersection.
Lin Li: "?"
What are you running for?
But the next second, Lin Li was a bit pleasantly surprised. Could it be that he was the king of luck, a blind cat meeting a dead mouse, and this kid was also one of the guilty evildoers?
Thinking of this, Lin Li immediately walked fast and started chasing.
In terms of running speed, there are not many creatures in this world faster than Lin Li now.
The distance between the two wasn't large to begin with, so the other party was caught up with at once, and was thrown to the ground.
"Speak…" Lin Li was just about to ask him why he ran.
But he saw the other party had already curled up holding his head, his voice full of fear: "Don't whip me with a dick! Don't whip me with a dick!"
Lin Li: "(；゜○゜)?"
Chotto matte.
"Wait a minute, bro, what you're saying is a bit brain-burning, let me think." Lin Li got up from the other party, his expression complex:
"You... know me?"
Although he really didn't want to admit it, Lin Li believed that in the whole of Xiling, the only one who would really use this thing to whip people was himself.
No, not himself, it was Black Silk Hero.
Sorry Black Silk Hero, we have righteously cut ties.
"I have no ill intentions towards you, you might have misunderstood something, don't worry, I won't whip you." But Lin Li planned to let the other party calm down first.
Seeing that Lin Li really didn't make a move on him, the other party let go of his head, and seeing Lin Li didn't stop him, he also stood up.
His expression was equally complex. Hearing Lin Li's words just now, he pursed his lips and slowly spoke: "Wow, it really is you..."
"You... know those students who were caught last week?" Lin Li asked.
Normally, this kind of thing wouldn't spread so easily, but those few were students after all, given their age, it wasn't impossible for them to spread the news after being released early.
"I don't know the ones who were caught, but this matter has indeed spread, almost our whole school knows." The other party nodded.
"How did it spread?"
After asking, seeing the boy hesitating, Lin Li raised his chin again: "Just repeat it directly, I won't take my anger out on you, I emphasize again, I really have no ill intentions."
—"Every night on Laoyou Street, there's a chance to spawn a fishing pervert who is over 1.8 meters tall, very handsome, very good at fighting, and calls himself Black Silk Hero. To satisfy his desires, he uses money to lure people. After they take the bait, he will play BGM while pulling out a super long fake dick from his clothes to violently whip people, and finally send a pack of black silk to the police station."
Lin Li: "(；☉_☉)?"
"Do you have the chat records of eating melons? Can you show me?"
Now Lin Li was a bit curious about how it evolved into this.
"Yes." The other party nodded, and very honestly opened his phone to show him.
Very classic, a melon strip with a chat record nested inside several chat records, nothing more.
A lot of the content inside was completely pieced together, embellished, and there was even a so-called blurry photo of the pervert himself. However, after Lin Li took one look, he found it wasn't him at all.
Normal, chat records are like this, you never know who is exactly on the left and right of the chat box.
When Lin Li was in the first grade of elementary school, he even added Jay Chou's QQ. At that time, Jay Chou even borrowed ten yuan from Lin Li to open a Yellow Diamond because all his money went into making new songs.
If it weren't for the fact that two days later, this Jay Chou turned into Kris Wu, Lin Li would have been willing to support him.
When he went to question Kris Wu, he explained that Jay Chou wasn't using this QQ anymore and gave it to him. He also said he just returned to the country and had no RMB, and borrowed ten yuan from Lin Li to open a Yellow Diamond.
Open your mom!
Go to jail!
From then on, Lin Li knew that so-called chat records were a piece of dog shit. Give him a few minutes, and he could make up a set of stories too.
After reading all the chat records the man gave him and finding absolutely no personal information about himself, Lin Li also breathed a sigh of relief.
"So... bro, is this true?" Seeing Lin Li not angry, but even somewhat amused, the other party asked tentatively.
"Of course not."
"Oh oh… so whipping people with a dick is fake!" The boy nodded in relief, "I knew it, how could there be such an idiot…"
Lin Li: "This part is true."
The other party: "?"
"Haha, actually, come to think of it, it's not very idiotic, I also want to whip, haha." The boy cried with a desolate face and said in despair.
And you fucking say you're not a pervert!
"The matter is true, I'm not a pervert, I purely wanted to experience it once." Lin Li didn't mind this 'insult' and explained.
The other party blinked.
How can this make me believe you're not?
Of course, he didn't dare to say it.
"Once is enough, I've stopped, don't worry, do I look like I have a weapon on me." Lin Li smiled.
"Haha, true." The other party responded cooperatively.
"Alright, bro, I stopped you because I really have a favor to ask, and it's paid, not fishing." Lin Li snapped his fingers and got back to business.
"You say."
Actually, the boy just wanted to slip away now, but he didn't dare, and could only nod respectfully.
"Actually, it's very simple, I just need you to provide me with information."
"To put it bluntly, act as an informant. For example, is there anyone in your school who collects protection fees long-term, organizes gang fights, colludes with gangsters outside the school to extort, steal, or gamble, etc.
As long as it's illegal, you can tell me… of course, the premise is that it can fit my free time, and it's best if I have time to deal with it."
"As long as you tell me information that meets these conditions, I will pay you based on the content you give me. The amount of the reward will definitely satisfy you. For example, you can take these three hundred yuan in cash first, consider it a deposit I paid in advance.
We can discuss the specific price of the information later."
Lin Li immediately stated his needs, counted out three notes from the paper money in his hand, and handed them to the other party.
"Eh?" The boy completely didn't realize Lin Li was going to say this, and was stunned after hearing it.
Then he became a bit wary again.
"Don't worry about me backstabbing you. You don't even have to tell me any of your information later. After getting the intelligence, I won't reveal to anyone who gave me the information."
"And I'm not asking you to backstab your bros, I'm not targeting anyone, so you can only provide information about people you have a bad relationship with, this is your freedom."
"But my requirement is that it must be true and reliable, it's best if you have some evidence, otherwise I'll make a wasted trip, you'll get nothing, and I might terminate the cooperation."
Lin Li continued speaking, explaining in advance some points the other party might care about.
"...That's about it."
After listening to Lin Li's words, the boy frowned and remained silent, falling into deep thought, lowering his head, his gaze occasionally sweeping over the ground and the money in Lin Li's hand.
Lin Li didn't rush him, standing leisurely aside.
After all, for him, there was really nothing to be anxious about.
Whether he accepted or refused, it didn't matter.
Even if this person was falsely compliant, accepted but played dead after taking the money, Lin Li wouldn't care.
Cast a wide net, catch more fish, a small loss is nothing to worry about.
And at least he could ask some information about what he usually does, where there are many gangsters, and how to get to know social middle-aged men and old men.
"...Okay, I agree, how do we contact." The boy looked up and looked around, seemingly confirming if anyone else saw, and finally nodded, asking softly.
"WeChat, QQ, whatever, up to you."
"QQ then."
"Okay, you tell me."
"Give me a nickname as a remark, I have to know what to call you." After searching for the other party's QQ, Lin Li added him, then clicked on the remark, raised his chin, and asked.
"Just call me Dengzi (Stool)." Dengzi said, "Bro, what should I call you?"
"Bai Bufan," Lin Li gave a name.
Are you kidding, his current persona is "Laoyou Street fishing pervert who pulls out a super long fake dick to violently whip people", it's too suitable for the usage scenario of the nickname Bai Bufan.
"How old are you?" Lin Li asked again.
"Eighteen." Dengzi answered.
"Eighteen?" Lin Li frowned, "What grade are you in?"
"I don't do gay stuff." Hearing this, Dengzi covered his butt and took two steps back, his expression somewhat terrified: "Bro, don't scare me."
"No, I'm asking what grade you're in, aren't you in vocational high school? Senior Three? Or held back? How come you're eighteen?" Lin Li chuckled and asked.
"Oh oh, bro, I'm in Senior Two, not held back, I'm talking about nominal age, I'm used to saying this..."
Dengzi breathed a sigh of relief and hurriedly answered.
At home, they all say nominal age, and add another year after the New Year, directly two years older than the actual age.
Actual age and nominal age are easy to remember.
Actual age is calculated from the time your mother pulled you out.
Nominal age is calculated from the time your father shot you out.
"Understood, I'm eighteen in actual age," Lin Li nodded, "Asking this is not to probe for information, just to confirm, otherwise being called bro by someone older than me, I feel weird."
"Okay, Brother Bai." Dengzi nodded.
Lin Li handed the money over, Dengzi took it, and then said thank you.
More polite than Zelensky, Vance is ecstatic.
"Alright, you go wherever you need to go," having gained something tonight, Lin Li was quite satisfied: "If you know people from other schools, especially people in society, and they are also willing to provide me with information, you can introduce them to me.
Again, money is not a problem, as long as it allows me to catch criminals, you can ask them their psychological price.
Anyway, as long as I have a harvest, I won't forget you, the middleman."
"Okay, Brother Bai." Dengzi's eyes immediately lit up, as if he already had some plan.
"Alright, let's leave it at that for now, we'll contact each other on QQ for details." Lin Li nodded.
The two parted ways.
(End of Chapter)