“I want to disappear...”
“Didn’t you meet with Viola last weekend? I thought I’d be seeing you all happy today.”
I must look incredibly gloomy right now, because Rex tilted his head to the side. He had been away from the palace for about a week to handle another job so this was the first time in a week I was seeing him. As for me, I’d been wallowing in despair ever since the day I last met Viola. There was no such thing as hope in this world.
I was in no state to do anything, but I still had plenty of work waiting for me. In fact, the work simply kept piling up. I was doing my best to sit in front of the documents and move my hand. To put it lightly, my life was absolute hell.
“I think Viola hates me now...” I said.
“Huh? What? What happened? What’d you do?” Rex asked.
“I don’t know why, but she got mad at me and called me a cheater.”
“Uh, how did that happen?”
Rex stared at me like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Truthfully, I was in the same boat. When she came to my house that day to spend time with me, she looked sad and then suddenly went home. She got angry and even accused me of cheating on her. I couldn’t even begin to fathom where that came from.
Of course, I didn’t cheat on her. However, Viola was one of the gentlest and kindest people I knew. Considering how mad she got, I most certainly wronged her in some unforgivable way.
Before she lost her temper, we were talking about the princess. But Viola said she liked children. She’d said that they were important and that we should take care of them. So I didn’t think that the princess had anything to do with it.
“Phillip, you were cheating on her?”
“Of course not. I didn’t even have time to and even if I did, I wouldn’t want to.”
“Yeah, I know. I was just asking. But then that means either Viola heard some rumors that made her think you did, or you made her suspect you with your words and actions.”
I didn’t reply, lost in thought. These past few months, I’d spent every bit of my free time meeting with Viola. The only time I spent with another woman was the other day when I went to the soiree with Princess Luna. But I’d met Viola at that party as well, even if it was by coincidence, and nothing happened that would have led her to believe I was cheating on her.
The only other person I spent a lot of time with was Princess Adele, but I couldn’t imagine that Viola would suspect me of cheating on her with a five-year-old girl. I couldn’t figure out the reason behind Viola’s anger and cradled my head in my hands.
For the longest time, I’d lived life thinking Viola disliked me. In the past, when she told me that she hated me right to my face, I was so upset that I genuinely thought I would die. However, I soon became used to it. Now that I knew the happiness of Viola telling me she liked me and seeing her smile at me, I finally learned how scary and painful it was having her despise me.
“So, what are you gonna do now?” Rex asked.
“I don’t know what I should do,” I sighed. “She hasn’t replied to my letter and I don’t have the time to go meet her.”
Besides, she told me that she wanted to spend some time apart. Since she even ignored my letter, she likely wouldn’t welcome my presence if I suddenly visited her in her home. The last thing I wanted was for our misunderstanding to get worse, or for her to hate me even more.
“In any case, I want to tell her that I’m sorry,” I said.
“But you don’t even know what you did wrong,” Rex pointed out. “I hear that apologizing to someone when you don’t even know what you’re apologizing for is a surefire way to make them mad.”
“To be frank, I’m angry about the situation too,” I admitted after a pause.
I honestly had no idea why I was being suspected of infidelity. I’d always been devoted to Viola and I never paid attention to any other woman. I set down the pen I’d been using to sign documents and then practically collapsed onto the desk, pressing my face into the wood.
“All right, all right,” I heard Rex say. “I’m sorry for being so mean to you. I’ll go check things out for now, so perk up.”
“Will you really do that for me?”
“Yeah. Leave it to your big bro.”
Apparently, Rex planned on going to meet Viola soon and he would try asking her about what happened then. Rex was certainly the most reliable person to have as a friend in times like this. I thanked him from the bottom of my heart.
“Sorry. I’m truly grateful for your help.”
“No problem. For now, let’s finish up work. We won’t be able to go home anytime soon at this rate.”
After he said that, Rex pointed to the mountains of documents piled up on the table.
✦ ✦ ✦
“This is from Rex?”
“Yes. It seemed like an emergency.”
In a blink of an eye, two weeks passed since I last saw Phil. While I was enjoying afternoon tea in the parlor with my mother, Selma handed me a letter that Rex had apparently sent me.
Since the day we had our argument, I hadn’t contacted Phil, nor had I met him. I was the one who decided to put some distance. Yet every day, my desire to meet him, as well as my anxiety, grew stronger. This was the longest I went without seeing or communicating with Phil since I pretended to have amnesia. Back then, aside from our monthly meetings, we didn’t even have the bare minimum of correspondence.
“T-Today... Later...?” I muttered.
I hurriedly opened up Rex’s letter and saw that he wanted me to go with him to a soiree tonight. He was practically begging me to do so. Normally, Rex didn’t appear before high society with a woman. This was so that he could avoid any unnecessary drama. However, some parties required its attendants to bring a partner. I was usually the one who accompanied Rex when he went to those. With the exception of Lady Natalia, no one would suspect us of anything untoward since we were related.
“Mother, I apologize. There’s been a change of plans. I’m to attend a soiree with Rex later so I’m going to go and get ready for it.”
“Oh dear, I see. Can you tell Rex that I said hello and that he should come have tea with us some time soon?”
“Yes, of course.”
My mother had always treated Rex extremely well. It was likely thanks to my mother spoiling him that he’d ended up the kind of person who would brazenly visit my house without even announcing himself beforehand.
There wasn’t much time left before the party. Since I owed a lot to Rex, I had no choice but to return to my room and quickly ask the maids to help me with my preparations.
✦ ✦ ✦
I put on the dress that I bought the other day, as well as clipped on a hair accessory that matched it.
“You look very beautiful. I knew that this dress would look good on you, Lady Viola.”
“Thank you. I’m glad that I bought this hair accessory as well.”
I looked at myself in the mirror and checked that everything was all right. Then, I ordered for the maids to leave my room. My matching necklace with Phil shimmered from around my neck. I gently placed my hand upon the necklace and sighed softly.
I wonder if Phil is with the princess again right now? What if in the time I spend avoiding him, he ends up falling for her?
As those thoughts swirled in my head, I let out a sigh.
“It’s so painful...”
Though I still had my reservations, I couldn’t help but want to see him again. Since it was about time to leave, I stood up before my vanity and headed toward the foyer.