Today had arrived much like yesterday, with the sky transitioning from a star-filled night to a watery hue, casting gentle rays across the yard. The pine tree and the vibrant flowers in the flowerbed basked in the warm summer morning sun. After taking a nostalgic gaze at the familiar yard where I had played since childhood, I took a deep breath and made my way to the living room.
“Good morning,” I greeted my mother, who was busy preparing breakfast in the kitchen. She turned around, and our eyes met. Her expression showed surprise, perhaps because I had woken up early. I smiled, thinking about it again.
“Mom, what time are you taking the shinkansen tomorrow?”
“I’m planning to take the nine o’clock one.”
“I see… That means everyone will be packing today.”
“Have you made your decision, Keiichi?”
“Yes. I’m going back too… with everyone.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am.”
It was finally the last day for the first blue moon to bestow its power. If Saki’s love and the purpose of my summer were to end with the blue moon, then I wanted my feelings to be erased along with them.
“But don’t you have a new friend? You’ve been going out with her every night and having fun, right?”
I thought my mother was truly observant. Perhaps she knew everything and was merely pretending not to.
“Yes, but she’ll be leaving soon as well.”
“I see.”
My mother hesitated in her words.
The more I saw Saki, the stronger my feelings grew. I had no idea how to handle these emotions. I was lost. Maybe I could still turn back now. I could quietly place this budding love in a box and close the lid. After all, I only just met her.
“Alright, that’s all I wanted to say.”
Saying that, I tried to leave the living room. As I pushed aside the noren , my mother asked, “Keiichi, what about breakfast?”
“I’ll have it after I go back to sleep.”
I returned to my room, slipped into bed, and tightly closed my eyes.
The first person I ever liked was my kindergarten teacher in the Sunflower Group. She was always kind and cheerful, and she praised me often.
Who had been my next crush? There was a girl in the upper grades of elementary school who’d kept bothering me, and even though I found her annoying, I would secretly watch her from behind.
When I reached middle school, a girl from the class next door confessed to me, and we started dating, but I didn’t truly understand what it meant to be a couple, so I just focused on playing soccer all the time. Then she said to me, “I don’t understand your feelings, Keiichi. Do you really like me?” I didn’t understand my own feelings. When she confessed her feelings for me, I agreed to date her. I thought my feelings would develop as we spent time together, but they didn’t grow, and a few days later, I apologized, and that was the end of it with her.
Falling for someone, mutual attraction, and becoming lovers — these things seemed easy in manga and dramas, but for me, they were incredibly difficult. While I envied my best friend’s awkward love life next to me, I examined myself with a somewhat calm perspective, realizing that I couldn’t even think about other people to such an extent.
And yet… I’d arrived in this town and fallen in love in an instant. For the first time in my life, I experienced love at first sight and was so enamored by Saki that my head spun. True to the notion of summer love, this affection was on the verge of ending, but I would never forget it. No, I wouldn’t be able to forget.
When I woke up from my nap, Akane was busy packing in her room. I watched her absentmindedly from the veranda, and our eyes met. She said, breaking my reverie, “You’re going home too, right? Hurry up and pack.”
“I’ll do it later.”
“Later, later — all you do is talk. You’re planning on doing it tomorrow morning, aren’t you? I bet you will.”
Women are terrifying, just as my mother used to say. Surely, Saki would’ve said something more gentle and charming. Thinking of her, I shook my head to clear my mind of such thoughts.
“You suddenly shook your head. How gross!”
“Shut up and leave me alone.”
“If you’re going home too, pack today. If you oversleep, I’ll leave you behind.”
“Alright, alright.”
Tired of my sister’s nagging, I retreated to my room. The bed remained unmade, a partially read novel lay on a table, and clothes were scattered about. I wondered which task to tackle first. As I pondered, my eyes fell upon an open suitcase in the corner of the room. I noticed a pencil case inside and a clear blue file containing summer homework and loose-leaf paper.
I hadn’t planned on doing it, but I had brought my homework just in case. I took a pen from the pencil case, pulled a blank sheet of paper from the clear file, and began writing. It wasn’t like me, but I wanted to capture my feelings in words.
Time passed slowly, with the light filtering through the tree branches and casting melancholic dusk. Just then, my phone rang. It was a Line message from Yuuya.
“How was your date?” he wrote in a short message.
“I had a great time,” I began to type, but then muttered, “Oh, damn it!” and scratched my head, erasing everything I had written. I felt a twinge of frustration. Yes, I did have a great time on my date with Saki, but… my feelings that followed the “but” were much stronger. How stubborn were my emotions, refusing to align with my intentions?
I couldn’t bring myself to reply. I pocketed my phone and grabbed a nearby bucket, filling it with water. Wetting a rag in the bucket, I squeezed it tightly and swiftly began wiping down the veranda floor. I moved at an astonishing speed.
“Wow, big brother, you’re amazing.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Let’s leave him alone when he’s like this.”
My sister and mother chatted in the living room, but their words were distant to my ears. When my mind couldn’t keep up, my body compelled me to move, no matter what.
Amid such activities, night had already fallen. Tonight was the last night I’d spend with Saki. That was why I resolved to smile. I didn’t want to wear a gloomy expression in front of her.
“I’m off,” I announced to the empty entrance, walking toward town.
Once again, I felt as if an invisible thread was pulling me, the blue moonlight guiding me into the forest.
I was the only one walking toward the forest in this town immersed in darkness.
Everyone else was headed toward Arashiyama Station the opposite way. By taking the train from the station, they could reach the bustling center of Kyoto. It was likely a lively night there.
People moved like characters in a silent movie, fading away from the frame. The sounds dissipated, and it felt like I was the only one left behind in this town.
In the serene landscape, I continued walking, eventually arriving at the forest. As I ventured into the thicket, a fragrance of dry soil and grass greeted my senses. The branches and leaves of the growing trees seemed to beckon as if whispering, “Welcome back.” Embracing the mountain path, I developed a fondness for each leaf, feeling a deep connection.
After some time, a verdant clearing unfolded before me. At the heart of this expansive azure realm stood Saki. She was crouched by the spring’s edge, playfully manipulating the water with a transparent umbrella, a routine she indulged in daily. She appeared just as resplendent as the day I first fell in love with her — the epitome of beauty in my eyes.
The water’s surface reflected the shadows of a grand indigo moon and stars. Even the light of a falling star danced upon the transparent umbrella. For the first time, it seemed as if a tiny star had been ensnared within its canopy. Transfixed by the spectacle, I found myself immobilized; her form was simply too enchanting.