I want a girlfriend!
Any young man with a pulse had probably thought the same thing at one point or another. As for me, Hiromichi Satou, I had been obsessed with the idea since at least the eighth grade.
But alas, reality was a cruel mistress. In just about every aspect, I would say I ranged from mediocre to below average. My appearance and athleticism—or lack thereof—were nothing to write home about. I didn’t have any remarkable skills, and I wasn’t exactly the brightest tool in the shed. My grades were decent, I guess, but that was only because I had plenty of time to study.
And so my middle school years had passed without a single girlfriend. In fact, I don’t think I had even spoken to a girl outside of the necessary school stuff, or to pass on a message.
I had made friends of the opposite sex once... way back in elementary school. Where had it all gone wrong? Well, from fifth grade onward, the idea of interacting with girls had become oddly embarrassing. I’d ended up distancing myself from them, having become too sheepish to approach them, and wound up in this sorry state.
Because I feared rejection, I’d never put myself out there—you know how it goes. And so, my time in middle school ended without a single girl. I had royally screwed myself over. Looking back on those three depressingly bleak years, I started to panic. Would I end up finishing my entire school life alone, a bitter virgin without a girlfriend? Please, God, anything but that! That would be a fate worse than death!
I want a girlfriend so friggin’ bad!
Although I didn’t have my eye on anyone in particular, I was still desperate. Seriously, I didn’t have a “type” at all—I’d probably end up falling head over heels for the first girl who confessed to me. I would treasure her above all else—of this, I was certain. I simply wanted to be loved! Doesn’t everyone else feel the same way?
In order to find that special someone, that “Cinderella,” I’d hyped myself up at the beginning of high school. This time, I would definitely succeed!
But, of course, that unbefitting enthusiasm was crushed after only one month. Whenever I had tried to greet girls, they had turned around and stared at me as if I was some sort of alien. Their suspicious, probing eyes, to me, seemed to say, “Who is this guy? What does he even want?” Before those gazes, I had deflated instantly, unable to utter another word.
I’d also asked my more sociable friends to include me in their groups. Unfortunately, I hadn’t gained much knowledge or experience of the bizarre entity known as the “female lifeform.” I had no clue what sort of conversation their “diets” consisted of, and as a result, I had only been able to come up with noncommittal responses.
Why did it have to be like this? It seemed that to talk to women, I needed to unlock the “charisma with women” skill. But in order to acquire the “charisma with women” skill, I needed to speak to women! Dios mio, sacre bleu! What was with this crappy, one-star game? Would someone please apply a patch to fix this buggy mess?!
In any case, my first year of high school had passed by in miserable shades of gray.
“Hm-hm-hmm! La-di-da-di-daaa!”
But that was all in the past—water under the bridge, you could say. It was now the spring of my junior year, and I was practically skipping my way to school, humming all the while.
Cherry blossom petals, which reminded me that summer was just around the corner, decorated my path. Morning dew clung to the freshly-grown greenery around me, sparkling and accentuating the leaves’ vibrant colors. How had I once thought of this wonderful world as a bleak, gray wasteland? It was inconceivable.
What had brought about this sudden change of attitude, you ask? Well…
I’d finally gotten a girlfriend. Yes, you heard me right—a real, flesh-and-blood girlfriend! Me, of all people! A girlfriend!
Ahem, apologies for the sudden outburst. Due to the importance of my announcement, I just wanted to emphasize the “real” nature of my girlfriend. I guess I got carried away there. Can you blame me, though? For once in my life, something exciting had actually happened to me.
Of course, I hadn’t been the one to profess my feelings. I wasn’t proud of it, but I didn’t have that kind of courage. After utterly flubbing the start of my high school career, I’d spent a lengthy freshman year with my male friends, never knowing the touch or scent of a woman. But that had all immediately changed as soon as I started my junior year—a girl had confessed to me!
We were the same age, and—despite attending the same elementary school—we’d each gone to different middle schools. It turned out that we went to the same high school, but I was in advanced placement, while she took regular classes. Since our courses didn’t overlap at all, I hadn’t been aware of her existence until the confession.
I vaguely remembered her from elementary school. We had both been placed in after-school daycare, and I had called out to her because she had been all alone. I guess I had been her first friend... Who knew it would have led to all this?
From the moment she’d confessed her feelings, my life had sprung from being broadcast in 144p to glorious 4K. It wasn’t just the colors either—since that day one month ago, everything about the world had undergone a drastic change.
Until recently, I had only picked up the thick, muggy exhaust fumes during my walk to school. Now, all I could focus on was the fragrant spring breeze. Likewise, the trill of the first bell had once beckoned yet another gloomy school day. Now, however, it proclaimed the good news of another day spent with my girlfriend. Finally, whenever I enjoyed udon in the cafeteria with her, the broth tasted as if it were produced by a gourmet restaurant.
“Anyway, Riko from the cheerleading club was basically begging for it, you know? So we went back to her room together.”
“Nice, dude! So how’d it go? You obviously plowed her, right?”
“Heh! Athletic girls never disappoint, know what I mean?”
Before, overhearing these sorts of conversations from the popular guys would have caused me to keel over from jealousy. Now, I could listen to them with a smile on my face. I could even feel—dare I say it—amicable.
Yes, yes, I understand. Romance truly is wonderful, the crème de la crème of our youth. Keep fighting the good fight, kings.
“Huh? But Aizawa, weren’t you going out with Mao Imura from the band? Did you break up with her?”
“Wait, wasn’t he dating Sogabe?”
“Nah, we weren’t really dating. C’mon, do you really think I’d settle for girls like them?”
“Huh? You serious? I thought both of them were pretty hot.”
“If I’m out of a girl’s league, no chance in hell am I committing. Chicks are always sliding into my DMs, man. I don’t need one hanging all over me, acting like she’s my girlfriend just because we’ve bumped uglies a few times. Gimme a break.”
I take it back. Those guys can eat shit and die.
Sure, there were still a few things that got under my skin, but for the past month, my high school life had never been more vibrant. I was certain this positive outlook was all thanks to my new girlfriend. Because of her, I’d also managed to muster up the courage to open up more with others.
Ladies and gentlemen—without further ado, I’d like to introduce the girl who gave me said courage.
School was over for the day, and I was sitting in the library by myself, waiting for my girlfriend to arrive. Unlike me, she was part of a club, so I had to wait for her if I wanted us to walk home together. I set about finishing my homework while repeatedly taking quick, eager glances at the library entrance. This continued for a while until I was suddenly hit by a wave of uneasiness. When I checked the time on my smartphone, I noticed it was 6:10PM.
Wait, 6:10? As in, 10 minutes after six o’clock?
We had promised to meet at 6:00 on the dot, and yet the library door remained closed. My girlfriend hadn’t shown up. How could this be? Oh God, what if it had all been a dream? Had everything up until now been the delusion of a lonely, kissless vir—
“Hiromichi!”
“Uwahgah!”
A cold sensation crawled up the nape of my neck, and I whirled around in response. There was the girl I’d been dying to see—my girlfriend, standing there with a soft drink in each hand and an innocent smile on her face. The features of her beautiful face stood out quite a bit, framed by slightly damp hair that trailed down to her collarbones. She was slightly shorter than me, with long, slender legs. All in all, she was the rare sort of beauty you could find on the cover of any teen magazine. And yes, she was my girlfriend, Haruka Saikawa.
Th-Thank God. It wasn’t a delusion. Since I’d pigeon-holed myself into the forever alone club, I often grew worried that my reality had become a little too convenient. I mean, why else would a beauty like Haruka go out with a nobody like me?
“Ahaha,” laughed Haruka. “Did I surprise you? Sorry for the wait. Practice dragged on longer than I’d expected. Here, take this drink—my humble offering as a way of saying sorry.”
“No, no, don’t worry. I just got here.”