Silence hung for a while.
Aside from the fact that I owed her, in the end, I didn’t know why I was thinking about her this much and why I was trying to be involved with her.
✦ ✦ ✦
The one thing I did know was—
—to me, she was special, in the real sense.
✦ ✦ ✦
Less than a minute must have passed before eventually, Hinami sighed in resignation and parted her lips a crack. “…Listen. I…”
“Huh? Really?” I blurted anticlimactically.
She shot me a sullen, sharp glare. “Not if that’s your reaction.”
“Wait, sorry, sorry! Forget that—tell me!”
She sighed, then once again, she began to talk.
It was the winter of fifth grade, and Aoi Hinami loved everything in the world.
Her whole life until then, Aoi’s days had been so bright, it was difficult to remember any times when she wasn’t happy. She was surrounded by a mother she loved and adorable little sisters; every day, she ate delicious homemade food. While it was a bit of a walk from the station, her home was large and clean and full of love.
“I like you. I love you. You’re good just the way you are.”
“Thank you for being born.”
Her mother, Youko, said those things so many times, the family’s pet parrot would imitate it, but no matter how many times Aoi heard it, it left her in such high spirits that her head was ready to pop.
If she absolutely had to dig up some unpleasant memory, then she could recall a fight with a friend at school once, but even that was connected to happy memories. It didn’t even count as a sad one.
✦ ✦ ✦
One winter, in the living room, Youko was stroking Aoi’s hair. They had three humidifiers running to keep everyone’s throats from drying out.
“It’s okay. You haven’t done anything wrong, Aoi.”
“Why…? But I said something awful…”
While looking at Aoi across from her at the dining table, Youko smiled gently. “Mm-hmm. You’re so kind, Aoi.” While petting her head like she always did, Youko told her slowly, “I’m sure your fight with Miyoko-chan was practice for other fights you’ll have like that in the future.”
“!”
“So it’ll be okay.”
Aoi suddenly raised her head, and the tears brimming in her eyes dried a little.
“Oh, I know!” Youko jolted out if her chair like she’d just remembered something and hit her right thigh on the table. “…Ow!”
“A-are you okay?!”
“Oh, I’m fine, I’m fine!” Youko said, putting on her slippers. She hopped off toward the kitchen on one leg to protect the one she’d hit, the way you’d expect from a girl Aoi’s own age.
“I got this from Sano-san.” She pattered over to the fridge, then opened the door and pulled out a rectangular white box that had been hot-stamped. “Ow, ow, ow…,” she said rhythmically along with her hopping. She was totally cheerful, as if she was still having a good time.
But if it hurt that much, she should just get the box after the pain subsided. Her mother seemed even more innocent than her, as always, and watching her filled Aoi with warm feelings and made her smile.
“Here.” Youko placed the paper box on the table and opened it, and inside was…
“…Cheesecake?”
Inside the open box was brown sugar sprinkled like sparkling gold over cheese, with moistly textured dough visible underneath. The cake looked thick and heavy, and you could imagine the rich sweetness even before eating it.
Youko smiled at Aoi like the sun. “When sad things like that happen, the best thing to do is have sweets.”
“R-really…?” Aoi asked, dumbfounded.
Youko smushed her daughter’s cheeks in her palms. “—Really!”
And suddenly, Aoi had a fork in her hand as Youko smiled down at her. Aoi obediently took a bite, and the moment she put it in her mouth, honeyed sweetness spread in her desolate heart. It was like with every bite, the sadness was gradually oozing away inside her mouth.
“…It’s so good.”
“Right?”
“It’s so good…”
She hadn’t thought that she’d been that bothered about that fight. But the taste shared between the two of them, the kind words, just felt rather warm. She gave a pathetic sniff, and her voice broke.
Youko ate the cheesecake with her and gave a gentle smile.
“It tastes sweeter than usual when your heart is tired, doesn’t it?”
“…Yeah.”
“That’s why…”
And then as if affirming everything about Aoi, Youko said: