Haruka-chan and I were at a nearby park.
“So she even started a fight with the teacher. She was like, ‘Yeah, in the staff room, where the air-conditioning is on high.’”
“Huh?! So she’s not really a good girl?!”
“It’s more like she’s too smart. But that made her really popular, and that’s how she became student council president.”
I talked about how Hinami had been at school before all this, too. I started off with the student council election to pull Haruka-chan in, and she was really surprised. Well, it was a pretty amazing story.
“Wow, I didn’t know any of that…”
Apparently, while Hinami acted similarly at home to the perfect heroine she played at school, she didn’t reveal the bold and fearless side she had shown during the election.
“And then at the end, she said, ‘Hexactly.’”
“She quoted Oinko in front of everyone?!” Shocked, Haruka-chan covered her mouth with both hands.
“Is it that surprising?”
“No…I’m kind of glad! My impression of her is so different.”
“Guess she’s not like that at home…,” I said.
Haruka-chan nodded. “It’s like I’m hearing stories about a different person.” She wiped the corners of her eyes, as if this was funny to her.
Her smile was bright and innocent. It reminded me of the childlike smiles that Aoi Hinami revealed when she was talking about video games.
But I was also glad to see she was enjoying herself this much, which meant my conversational skills were pretty amazing, too. When Hinami is in perfect heroine mode, she often laughs at what other people say—it’s important in communication not just to talk, but to listen.
“So then can I ask how you see your sister?” I said, meeting her gaze.
Haruka-chan grinned, which drove away the awkwardness. “Yeah, sure!” Then she gave a thoughtful “Hmm.”
Well, that’s no wonder. Being asked to “tell me something” about the sister you’d lived over ten years with under the same roof was a really broad question.
“…Um, is there anything you wanted to ask?”
“Hmm…” A number of issues I had to resolve crossed my mind—the video letter, her other sister, and her relationship with her parents.
There was a mountain of things that I didn’t understand. So which one of them should I ask about?
But for some reason—
“Haruka-chan…”
—what came out of my mouth first was this:
“…what do you like about your sister?”
Even I thought it was a strange question to bring up right now. If I wanted to head straight to resolving Hinami’s problems, there was any number of other questions I should be choosing. But the words that came out felt emotionally honest.
Haruka-chan’s expression suddenly brightened into a sincere smile. “You know!” She sounded excited.
And when I heard her answer—I thought maybe this was what I’d wanted to hear.
“I want to be like my big sister!”
Recalling warm memories, she wore a smile that sparkled as if happiness were bursting in her head. The tone of her voice was colorful, as if she unwaveringly believed in Aoi Hinami as a person from the bottom of her heart, and she was so happy to talk about it.
It was somehow overwhelming to see.
“Be like your sister?”
“Yeah!” Haruka-chan nodded honestly. “I’m the dumbest one in our family—so it’s like being cheery is all I’ve got going for me!” She chuckled shyly. “So I used to feel like my job was to make everyone smile. But…” Her expression slowly grew a little somber. “Um…a lot of things happened at once. There was a time when I didn’t know what I should do or how I should act.”
I thought of that incident Hinami had told me about.
“Even though being peppy was the only thing I was good at, all the little things became scary to me, like going to school or talking to people…”
The death of the other sister they’d had. I couldn’t be certain if that was what she was talking about now, but I couldn’t imagine what else would have made her feel this way.
“Back then when I talked to Mom about it, she said, ‘You’re okay the way you are; you don’t have to change.’ That made me feel a little better, but…”
“Yeah?”
“Even if it made it easier, it didn’t change that I still felt sad deeper down. The anxiety just got worse and worse, like it was choking me.”
I kind of got it.
Being left behind by the world, feeling uncomfortable no matter where you are. Times like that, my place to belong had been Atafami, but if I hadn’t had that—
—I’m sure it would be really hard to live all alone like that.
Eventually, Haruka-chan’s tone grew softer. “So I tried asking Aoi about it, too—if it’s okay for me to be like this. If it really was okay for me not to change.”
“You asked her that…?”
“And then…she told me.” As she recalled that important memory, Haruka-chan’s smile seemed a little mature.
That was the look of the gamer I knew so well. It brought to mind the voice of the perfect heroine, with a smile on her face like a warm embrace for her sister.
“She said, ‘So you don’t know anymore, either, huh—?’” Haruka-chan said, slowly looking up at the sky.