“Oh, my apologies,” she said, her voice losing its husky quality and shifting to something more pleasant and easy to understand. Her hunched back stretched upward, the puddles of wrinkles on her face flattened, and her skin regained a youthful quality. Her white hair darkened to blonde and regained a healthy sheen. I was mystified.
The head elder’s breasts swelled larger, giving her a voluptuous figure. I slapped my hand over my mouth, and some of those watching chuckled at my expense.
Miss Hertrauda frowned at me. “I hope you will act more discreetly in front of my elder sister.”
An image of Miss Hertrude popped into my head. She wasn’t particularly well-endowed; her breasts paled in comparison even to Miss Hertrauda’s. Maybe she was self-conscious about that.
Anyway, the blonde elven beauty—that is, the head elder who’d foretold my future last time I saw her—winked at me.
That’s one gorgeous woman, I thought. It proved how cruel time’s ravage could be to a person’s beauty.
“It’s been a long time, Hero,” she said.
“Yeah, I guess it sure has. Uh, what’re you doing here?”
Come to think of it, she’d mentioned something about a hero when she was fortune-telling.
“I returned here rather recently.”
“Returned here?” I didn’t understand what she meant.
The head elder shook her head in disappointment. “The important thing is that you seem completely unaware of what you’ve accomplished. You saved a world on the brink of destruction and laid a new path forward.”
What? She wasn’t making any sense. I needed her to explain this to me like I was a child. “What do you mean ‘on the brink’?” I asked, eyeing her suspiciously.
She ignored my question. “It’s all right if you don’t realize the gravity of that,” she continued. “What matters is that you saved the world thanks to your natural desire to do so. You’ve been through much toil on your journey, and your efforts do not go unappreciated. I’m certain you’ll keep the world on the right path and prevent the impending disasters that still await.” She clasped her hands as if in prayer.
This elf lady was exactly the type I went for. She wore the traditional garb of her people, but I could still make out the lines of her killer body, thick in all the right places. If I’d met this version of her in the village, I might’ve tried to win her over.
Hearing someone so attractive shower me with compliments left me lightheaded. “No, it was nothing, really,” I said with a bashful laugh, getting carried away. Then, with a sinking sensation, I finally digested her words. “Uh, hold up. Is it just me, or did you throw something ominous in at the end there?”
The head elder smiled at me. “You’ve saved the world many times before, Hero. Luxion’s presence here is proof of your deeds. He is a demon king of old. The Metal Demon King.”
Wait. Luxion’s a demon king?! I stared at him, open-mouthed. He looked awfully cocky for someone trapped in a tiny metal body.
“Surprised?” he said.
“No, not really. I mean, when we first met and you came out of standby mode, you immediately started going on about expunging all the new humans—wait!”
That’s right. When I found him, he was already talking about ignoring the standby order he’d received and wiping out civilization. I’m not imagining that, right?! I know he said it! Had I actually made a really smart play by retrieving him when I did, before he could wreak havoc on the world?
“If I hadn’t met you, Master, I would have remained ignorant of the truth and annihilated old humanity’s descendants, along with everyone else. I almost destroyed my very reason for existing. It was lucky that I encountered you when I did,” said Luxion.
“Wait. You were serious about that eradication nonsense? It wasn’t a joke?”
“Of course I was serious,” he answered without missing a beat, sending a chill down my spine.
He’s dangerous. But since I’d protected the world from him, didn’t I deserve to be relieved of further duties?
“That’s not all,” said the head elder. “You saved two women from misery—though that perhaps owed less to your efforts than to Saint Marie’s. Nonetheless, those two might’ve brought the world to its knees. Next, there was the war between Holfort Kingdom and the Principality of Fanoss. Had Holfort lost that conflict, the empire could easily have ended the Alzer Republic, and the world would’ve lost every last trace of old humanity. That would, in turn, have led to the end of everything we know. Then you triumphed in the Alzer Republic, stopping the Sacred Tree when it went out of control. If not for—”
It was fine that everything I’d done had ended in our favor, but that only made me sound good in retrospect. I hadn’t been aware of any of those consequences at the time.
“That’s enough!” I interrupted. “Look, I didn’t do all that stuff because I thought it’d save the world. I just didn’t like how things were going, so I stepped in. Seems odd to declare me a hero based on coincidences, don’t you think?”
Anyone—myself included—would enjoy being praised as a hero. All the flattery had almost convinced me that I was the hero they thought, but I couldn’t get that carried away. I was a normal guy. In game terms, I was no more than a mob, and I understood that. No one could reasonably call me a hero. On top of it all, I’d made a lot of bad choices along the way, and sacrificed many people. Instead of relying upon me because things had worked out, they’d be better off calling a real hero in.
“Actual heroes are way more impressive than I am,” I told them. “They’re strong, kind—the complete opposite of me.”
If someone else wanted to save everyone, I’d happily lick their boots. Okay, no, that’s disgusting. Maybe I’d be nice and carry their things for them instead.
The head elder cradled her head in her hands. Even exasperated, she looked stunning. “Mmm. What a conundrum this is. I suppose we’ll just have to take the hard route. Everyone, shove him back through the gate, and force him to return!”
People’s hands stretched out, grabbing me and lifting me, ready to toss me through the gate before I could struggle further.
“St-stop! Hey, Luxion, quit watching and do something, would you?!”
“I must politely decline. I hope instead that you find happiness upon your return. That is all I desire, Master.”
Ugh, you really piss me off! It’s not fair to say such sentimental stuff now!
“You’re a real pain in my backside, you know! After I turn into an old prune and kick the bucket, I’m going to come back here and sock you one! I hope you’re ready! You wait right there! Got that? Right there! I’m coming back for you, I swear!”
Liquid dribbled from Luxion’s lens. “Yes, do that. I will wait right here until you return as an old man. It’s more my style to await someone than to be the one seeking them out. It won’t be that long, anyway. You will return in under a century. That is much less time than I spent awaiting you before.”
The crowd tossed me at the gate. As its darkness swallowed me, I thrust my hand toward Luxion. “I swear I’ll come find you again! And thank you for everything you—”
I didn’t get to finish before I was pulled into the living world.