“Oh-ho, I can understand that. But you should savor the awkwardness while you can, Amane. There won’t be any more things like this after you graduate.” Parent-teacher conferences were typically uncomfortable and intimidating for the students, but they didn’t seem to be hard on the parents. Amane’s mother probably had an especially easy time, though. She certainly seemed to enjoy the parents’ side of things. Amane answered his mother with a deep sigh. November was halfway through—the air was getting colder, and hot drinks seemed more appealing. The warmth of the delicious tea Mahiru brewed for them spread throughout Amane’s whole body. Amane had surrendered the seats on the sofa to his mother and girlfriend and sat cross-legged on the floor, taking little sips of his tea as he watched the two of them chat congenially. As always, his mother got along better with Mahiru than with her own son. “You have your parent-teacher conference tomorrow, don’t you, Mahiru dear?” Amane could have throttled his mother for the way she casually stomped right on that land mine. Though he knew if he overreacted, it would only provoke Mahiru, so he managed to stop himself with just a little groan. When Mahiru looked up, she was wearing her usual smile. “Yes, but mine will be a two-person meeting instead of three. I haven’t told my parents about it, so it won’t be a ‘parent-teacher’ conference, exactly.” Even after the announcements about the meetings went out, Mahiru had not heard from her parents, and sure enough, it sounded like she hadn’t mentioned it to them, either. Shihoko, who knew a certain amount about Mahiru’s family situation, looked at her very calm, unruffled expression. While Shihoko’s expression remained perfectly composed, she sighed lightly, then casually replied, “Well, I suppose that means there’s a free spot for me to join you.” “Mom…” When she made that preposterous suggestion, Amane almost rose to his feet. His mother wasn’t joking one bit, however, and with a very serious look, she said, “I mean, ‘parent-teacher’ means ‘parent-teacher,’ but they didn’t specify whose parent. In other words, as long as I’m somebody’s guardian, it should be fine, right?” She continued, speaking as though she thought the idea was golden. “Besides, she’s essentially my daughter, so I don’t think there would be any harm in me hearing about her future plans. I don’t think I’m any different from her real guardian.” “How can you say that with a straight face? Our homeroom teacher will laugh you out of the room.” “What if I ask Shuuto to do it so it’s not so obvious?” “I thought you said Dad couldn’t get any time off work.” Even though he was fully aware that his retort wasn’t going to get him anywhere, Amane felt like he had to say something, and the words just kept on coming. “Anyway, that’s not the problem,” he continued. “You can’t just ignore Mahiru’s wishes. Especially in a meeting about her future. If an outsider suddenly barged in, no matter how close they are to her, that would probably make Mahiru uncomfortable, don’t you think?” “Ah, I suppose you’re right. Silly me, I do tend to charge ahead.” “No, I’m so happy for the sentiment!” “You don’t have to worry about my mom’s feelings.” “I’m not just being polite. I really am so grateful, and I’m thrilled she wants to go. That’s the truth.” Mahiru shook her head slowly, and he figured she was being honest. His mother’s proposal didn’t seem to have made her uncomfortable in the least. The only thing that made Amane wonder whether she was genuinely happy for it was the sense of resignation he picked up on in Mahiru’s expression, even as shades of envy and yearning bled through. “How great would it be if she could come with me?” Mahiru hadn’t said anything, but Amane could almost hear her thinking that. “However, we’re certain to wind up talking about my home life, so I think they’ll tell you that having you there will make the teacher hold back. Even if you were so kind as to accompany me, it would just be a waste of your time…” Rejected, his mother let her shoulders fall in disappointment, but Mahiru immediately smiled again, taking Shihoko’s hand and looking into her eyes. Amane wasn’t able to read the sweet yet bitter expression that briefly flickered across Mahiru’s face. “Please understand I really do appreciate the thought. I’m so happy to hear that you think of me as a d-daughter, Shihoko.” “Oh please, you’re already like a daughter to me, dear.” “Mom…” “Heh-heh, Amane, you’re blushing! You’re blushing!!” “I’m about to be real mad.” Amane wasn’t sure whether his mother had noticed the slight change in Mahiru, but at least Shihoko hadn’t pressed the matter directly. Then she had to drag Amane into the conversation, which changed the mood entirely. Amane, following along, shot her a half-hearted glare. Shihoko seemed to find his attitude amusing, and she looked mischievous as she whispered to Mahiru with a carefree smile, “He’s hiding his embarrassment.” Then to Amane, she said, “It’s cute when you act like this. You’re easy to read. Don’t you think, Mahiru dear?” “Amane is always cute.” “Mahiru…” “What? I do always think that you are cute and handsome, Amane.” Amane understood that to girls, calling someone cute was a compliment and that she had meant it in a loving way. But given what he knew about Mahiru, he couldn’t completely dismiss the possibility that she really did think he was cute, which was hard to swallow. Amane would have preferred that she leave it at handsome, but he was also aware that she had seen his many foibles and somehow, bafflingly, still thought he was cute. He obviously refrained from voicing his complaint, though he figured he could get away with shooting her a slightly reproachful look. Amane couldn’t verbalize his dissatisfaction at Mahiru’s appraisal, and his mother looked at him with her usual smirk as she announced, “Well, that means sweet Mahiru gets to see cute sides of yourself you never show your parents. You’re only honest about your feelings in front of her, too, I assume.” “Heh-heh, I think Amane is always honest about his feelings.” “That would be wonderful, but our Amane, you know, is rarely up-front with me about how he’s feeling. Even though when he was little, he was so direct and sweet.” “Just as you’d expect, I think boys of a certain age can’t be honest with their mothers. The embarrassment overrules it all. I think it’s wonderful that Amane just gets a little more outspoken but still stays so considerate. He does shut down when you say too much, though.” “You’re exactly right, sweetie,” Shihoko replied. “He’s at the age where boys want to be aloof and brooding. Although on the inside, he hasn’t changed one bit from how he used to be, which alleviates any of my worries.” “Why do I always feel like I’m playing an away game in my own home…?” Amane groaned. Even though he had also felt like the odd man out during their visit to his parents’ house, he didn’t expect to feel that way in his own apartment. He couldn’t let his guard down— Whenever Mahiru saw his mother, she was no longer solely his partner. She had no qualms about going over to the enemy’s side. Now the two were once again conspiring to whittle down Amane’s stamina. “Goodness, does that mean I have the home field advantage, no matter where I am?” “Could you give it a rest, Mom? Really, you’re unbelievable.” “This is exactly what I was talking about, Mahiru. He tries so hard to hide it when he’s uncomfortable. It’s adorable.” Shihoko laughed and teased him that they were only words, and Mahiru laughed right along with her. Amane felt his energy approaching dangerously low levels. “Heh-heh, the two of you get along so well.” “I wouldn’t call this ‘getting along,’ Mahiru…” Amane was already completely exhausted. Mahiru giggled softly at him as she said, “Just my assessment as an onlooker,” and gave Amane an adorable wink. After about an hour, Amane’s mother quickly and elegantly took her leave, stating she had work the next day. Immediately, the lively atmosphere settled down, and Amane got his peace and quiet back. Although relieved that his usual peaceful, serene environment had returned, Amane also found himself wishing his mother could have stayed a little longer, since Mahiru seemed to enjoy having her there. However, she often made comments that wore away at Amane’s spirit, so it seemed a quick exit was best. That was the problem with his mother—if she didn’t tease him so much, he would want her to spend a lot more time with Mahiru. “Heh-heh, it’s good to see that your mother is doing well.” Mahiru leaned back on the sofa with a relaxed smile, and Amane took a seat beside her, grimacing, and sipped on his cold tea. “Yeah, sure, I mean she’s always energetic like that, but I’m glad she’s well, too. I’d seriously like her to calm down a little bit, though.” “I think it’s good. It’s very like her.” “Well, that is true.” “Heh-heh, you have a hard time with your mother’s energetic personality, don’t you, Amane?” “It’s more accurate to say that I have a hard time with all the damage that comes flying my way.” Having Mahiru around seemed to make his mother about 50 percent more intense. Whether she was aware of that or not, Mahiru just smiled, amused. For Amane, the most important thing was that Mahiru was enjoying herself, so he didn’t have the slightest intention of criticizing her, but still, he thought it would probably be a good idea to work out a better way to parry his mother’s attacks. He let out a sigh heavy with seventeen years of futility. “Your mother seemed pretty busy, huh?” Mahiru muttered, perhaps remembering how suddenly Amane’s mother had departed after their chat. “Yeah, something to do with deadlines for work. I’m just glad she could come at all. It sounds like my dad wanted to come, too, but he’s super busy right now and couldn’t get away.” “Heh-heh, you have so much love in your life.” She spoke amusedly, enviously, and earnestly, and her words made Amane bite his lip a little. Mahiru looked at him, her eyes softening. “You’re very easy to read, Amane. I know you’re worried about my meeting.” The moment he let his guard down, the sharp knife of truth came flying straight at him. Amane stiffened, but Mahiru saw his reaction and said in an incredibly tender voice, “Bull’s-eye, huh?” Amane figured the fact that he had picked up on anything might only add to Mahiru’s burden, so he knew he should have pretended as though he wasn’t worried. Yet when he saw Mahiru’s face, he found it impossible to smile along and hide his true feelings. “It’s just like you to be so kind like that, Amane, but I don’t want to put more on your plate. You really don’t have to worry about it.” Mahiru, who apparently had easily understood his intentions, grinned at Amane’s embarrassment. She didn’t seem hurt. She simply looked as if she had come to terms with her current situation, as though she were taking a more detached approach. “You really don’t have to worry about it, Amane, okay? There’s no question that my parents are at fault. It’s wrong for them not to fulfill their responsibilities toward their children.” “…Yeah.” “Besides, I didn’t even tell them about the meeting because I was so confident they wouldn’t come. There’s really no way I would expect them to show up. I’m the one who eliminated that possibility, so I can’t expect any other outcome. I invited this situation.” Looking at Mahiru’s incredibly faint smile, Amane couldn’t stop himself from frowning. “The possibility that they might pay any attention to me… Hanging on to that incredibly thin, brittle thread without it snapping is impossible. I don’t want to suffer the anxiety of holding out hope for something so unlikely, so this is fine.” “Mahiru…” “I don’t really need my parents for the meeting, you know. I can make my own decisions.” Mahiru spoke definitively, without any strain or hesitation, and put on a quiet smile with a knowing look in her eyes. There was none of the usual warmth she showed to Amane. “I don’t need my parents’ input to know my grades and transcripts are fine. Apparently, I’m enrolled in an educational endowment insurance plan, so I don’t need to worry about money, either. They’ve set aside funds for my education and job search, too. The one thing they made sure of is that I wouldn’t have any financial struggles, which is nice, I guess… As little as they’ve participated in my life, they have done the most to provide for me financially, which I’m grateful for.” Mahiru was suggesting the trade-off was because they had never given her anything else. Amane read self-derision in her smile as she sighed. He expected her breath to be warm, but he sensed a chill. “I know how privileged I am. The two of them hired Miss Koyuki, who’s wonderful, to stay by my side, and maybe because they felt a little shred of guilt, they set things up so that I would never want for anything in my life. Thanks to all that, I grew up all right—like a normal person.” Conversely, if Miss Koyuki hadn’t been around, Mahiru would have surely grown twisted, which Amane couldn’t possibly be happy about. “I’m capable of making my own decisions without instruction from my parents. When I remember that, it doesn’t seem like a big deal that they’re not around… You don’t have to make that face, Amane.” “Sorry.” “Why are you apologizing now? Geez!” Amane knew carelessly offering compassion and comfort, or agreeing with her, would only deepen her hurt, so the only thing he’d been able to do was listen and be there for her in her moment of vulnerability. When he squeezed Mahiru’s slender hand, he could feel her warmth, less than usual, slowly entwining with his own. He thought it would be good to lend her some of his warmth and held her trembling hand firmly as he inched closer. Amane’s lack of hesitation in scooting closer surprised her, and after a momentary daze, she lowered her eyes awkwardly. “I’m okay, really. My view of my parents is set in stone at this point. It’s far too late for that to change. It would be a lie to say it doesn’t hurt or bother me at all, but I don’t feel terribly sad over it. It’s just a given in my life.” “You have to know that’s not something that should be normal.” “Sure. But it is a fact, so there’s no point trying to ignore the truth. I feel it fully, regardless.” Mahiru was likely overestimating her own strength, but she was unshakable, and Amane was underestimating her adaptability. He started to realize that as he adjusted his grip on her hand, which was slowly beginning to warm up. “As far as I’m concerned, we had a clean separation, and that’s fine. It’s because I’ve lived my life alone that I was able to meet you, Amane, so I’m also grateful for that.” “…Sure.” Mahiru spoke decisively, in a dignified manner. His beloved was too dazzling to look at. This time, he embraced her, not just her chilly hand, and held her close. Her slim body was trembling with surprise, but it didn’t take long for her to relax. Mahiru, who had lived an honest, straightforward life, leaned her small body against Amane, reassured by his accepting embrace. It was enough to make it obvious how much she depended on him. She wriggled around, adjusting her position until it was just right, then maneuvered to where she could easily look at Amane and smiled awkwardly. “You are such a worrier, Amane. I’m not weak enough to be broken by something like this. If I got depressed every time this happened, I wouldn’t be able to live my life.” “It’s not a matter of being strong or weak… I hate the idea that someone could so casually hurt the girl I love… It’s frustrating. I want to protect you, but this is another reminder that there’s so much I can’t do.” There was nothing Amane could do about the environment Mahiru had grown up in or the issues with her parents she now faced. He couldn’t change the past, nor could he affect her present. He loved and treasured her, and desperately wanted to protect her, but as long as she had another family’s name, Amane was powerless. He was scared, too, that barging his way over that boundary might intrude on something that was tender and fragile. For the moment, all Amane could do was hold her so those more fragile parts of her didn’t get hurt and do away with any unnecessary interference or irritation. “This is my problem, okay? I’m not rejecting your help. I just have to solve this on my own. It’s something that only the people involved could understand.” Mahiru also seemed to realize that Amane’s hands were tied and made it clear that she wasn’t asking him to do anything. Amane understood that she wanted him to be his rock and never leave her side. He nodded softly to Mahiru in his arms, who looked up at him quietly. “It’s impossible for me to understand everything you’re feeling, Mahiru. No matter how much I care, our circumstances were different.” “You’re right. In the end, I’m me, and you’re you. Even if you can put yourself in my shoes, you can’t know everything.” “Yeah.” No matter how much anyone struggled, they couldn’t change reality. Amane was Amane, and Mahiru was Mahiru. Even if their lives intersected and intertwined, they would not become one and the same. Mahiru would never be someone else, no matter what anyone did, and no one could ever perfectly detail everything in her heart. Her feelings were her own. Her thoughts were clear only to her. Amane understood that face, and he had no intention of trying to force her to talk about her feelings or to try to make her do anything, really. “But I love that you try to understand, Amane. You don’t try to force your values on me. You stay by my side and watch over me, and I love that.” “…Mm.” “I know that you care about me so much and that you treat me with incredible kindness. I’m constantly thinking about how lucky I am.” Those must have been her true thoughts, straight from the heart, because her face melted into a soft, cherubic smile, and she pressed her cheek against Amane’s chest, looking comfortable as she enjoyed his warmth. He knew this was Mahiru at her most indulgent. Recognizing her desire to be spoiled for once, Amane kissed her flaxen hair, which fell around her like waves, then touched his forehead to hers. “…I’m going to make you even happier. If things ever get really tough, make sure you say something. You have a bad habit of toughing things out and saying everything’s fine.” “I am fine. Ah—this time, I really mean it.” “…But sometimes, you say you’re fine when you’re not, right?” “I’ll keep that in mind. And I know that when I’m hurt, you feel hurt, too, Amane. I really am so loved.” Mahiru spoke with an unflinching confidence that she didn’t use to have, which gave Amane a deep assurance that she accepted all his feelings. He was overflowing with so much love for Mahiru that he could hardly stand it. He clung closer to Mahiru, melting into her warmth, and she just smiled and accepted his embrace. “Heh-heh, if I was immature enough to let this make me depressed and desperate, I bet I would’ve started an argument like ‘How could you understand, Amane? You were raised with love and care!’” “You know I wouldn’t have a comeback if you said that.” Amane knew that growing up, he was showered with affection and that his parents treasured him. If she threw that in his face, his only option would be to apologize. Even if that apology had a chance of rubbing her the wrong way. Amane had come to understand quite well throughout his life that if someone mentioned something to a person who lacked that thing, it could upset them and cause a rift. “Saying that would only hurt us both, so I don’t intend to.” “…You still thought it, though, didn’t you?” “Well, I can’t say the thought never occurred to me.” That wasn’t a shock. It was something he had been internally anxious about, and having her confirm it was, in a way, a relief. He knew perfectly well that Mahiru’s life was not all sunshine and rainbows, but she rarely let that show, and knowing that was the case only made him love her more. “If all I did was whine about things instead of coping or trying to improve my situation, I wouldn’t be doing myself any favors. And you didn’t pick your childhood, Amane, so blaming you for that wouldn’t accomplish anything, would it? I know the moment I said anything, I would regret it.” She carefully and rationally explained that she didn’t want to argue or hurt him, maintaining her gentle expression all the while. “It’s only natural that we have our differences… I grew up in a household that lacked the kind of affection you can find in almost any other home, and I’ve felt the effects of that over and over. During my elementary and middle school days, I processed all of that envy.” Amane thought it was a wonder how such negativity hadn’t paralyzed her and figured it had a lot to do with Miss Koyuki’s presence. “I don’t know the trouble that can arise as a result of being loved, or the annoyance of having parents stick their noses where they don’t belong, so I’m not in a position to say anything about that. I do feel a little jealous—just a little—but…I’m trying to be good and keep that reined in.” Mahiru finished that thought and looked up at Amane with concern. Amane was starting to wonder who should be worried about whom. He felt pathetic, and a mirthless smile rose to his lips. “You almost never get emotional. You have a good handle on your feelings, Mahiru… Ah— Did I say too much?” “Heh-heh, you’re right on the money… You’re really paying close attention to me. I can tell.” “I definitely am. You’re the person I love. I’m always watching carefully.” He wanted to know everything about the girl he loved. He wanted to understand the girl he loved. It was precisely because she was the girl he loved that he wanted to be attentive, so she could be comfortable around him. He wanted to make her happy. He wanted to protect her from anything that might make her sad. He had all sorts of reasons, but they all boiled down to his all-encompassing love for Mahiru. He wanted to watch over her with care. He wanted to do a good job and really know what she was feeling on the inside, instead of just seeing what was on the surface. He had said as much without hiding anything, and in his arms, Mahiru repeatedly knocked her head against his chest, struggling awkwardly. “…Saying stuff like that with a straight face… You’re becoming more and more like your father.” “Why would you say that during a conversation like this?” “No reason.” The sudden mention of his father perplexed Amane. Mahiru turned her face away uncooperatively to signal that she didn’t need to explain herself and gave him another bump with her head. Somehow, he could tell she was just hiding her embarrassment, so he rubbed Mahiru’s back to comfort her, which earned him a vaguely pouty look. He smiled and said she looked cute like that, too, and kept rubbing. That seemed to make her pouting dissipate, and he felt her give up on resisting with a final “Good grief.” “You know, I’m glad you said I take after my dad, though. Sure, he’s my dad, but I think he’s a person worth looking up to.” “That wasn’t what I meant, but that’s also true. You ought to be proud, and I think your mother would agree.” “My mom’s standards would be crazy high since she’s head over heels for my dad. You’re probably right, though.” “Heh-heh, I wonder?” For some reason, Mahiru was grinning, amused. When Amane looked down at her, she gave him an impish grin and looked at him cheerfully as she leaned against him again. Confused as he was, Amane smiled at Mahiru’s spoiled behavior, and they shared each other’s warmth. Though he was charmed by the adorable, kitten-like way she snuggled up to him, Amane suddenly wanted to say something that had been weighing on him. “I was just thinking…” “Yes?” “You think I’m a lot like my dad, right?” “I think you’re just like him. That goes for your looks, too, but especially your behavior.” It was only natural that Amane resembled his father, but setting that aside, he wanted to move on and asked his next question. “Well, I wonder if you resemble Miss Koyuki?” “Huh? M-me?” It must have been something she had never considered, because Mahiru was clearly bewildered when she responded with a squeak. “Yeah. From everything I’ve heard, I kind of get the sense you resemble her.” Amane figured that while certain aspects of a person’s character and behavior were hereditary, others were picked up by those close to them. Amane didn’t know Mahiru’s exact makeup, but at the very least, she didn’t seem to resemble her mother at all, and based on what she’d told him, she wasn’t like her father, either. In which case, logic would follow that she might take after Miss Koyuki, who had had such a big influence on her upbringing. “I—I wonder… I mean, it is true that I learned a lot of different things from her, and I probably do take after her there, but…you can’t really make that call if you haven’t actually met her yet.” “That’s true, but it does seem like you might be a lot like her.” “Based on what, exactly…?” “Intuition, maybe? I think you probably do. Possibly.” “Geez.” Mahiru might have thought he wasn’t being serious, but internally, Amane was strangely confident about this. Mahiru described Miss Koyuki as a refined, compassionate, and gentle person, and Mahiru herself had said she aspired to be like her. In his eyes, Mahiru seemed to have those same qualities. Whether Mahiru was conscious of it or not, it was hard to think two people who exhibited the same behaviors could have no resemblance. He had never had the chance to confirm it, so he couldn’t judge with any real certainty, but he imagined Miss Koyuki to be a wonderful person, likely on equal standing with Mahiru. “I’ve had this thought before, but I would like to meet her someday. She’s an important person to you, right?” “Yes, very. She’s the person who took the best care of me. I’d also like to see her again. It’s been a long time. I’m sure she has her own things going on, and she does have physical issues, so I don’t want to impose. We do exchange letters from time to time, but…I really do want to see her.” “I see… You write to each other?” “Yes. I would feel annoying contacting her all the time, so I really only send around one letter a season. And I hold on to every letter I get from her—they’re my treasures.” “Mm.” Mahiru’s cheeks flushed as she spoke, and her eyes glistened with sincerity. It was clear Mahiru really did miss her. The fact that Mahiru missed her so dearly made Amane want to meet the woman even more. “…Oh, that reminds me, I’ve got a photograph that was in one of Miss Koyuki’s letters. Wait just a minute. I’ll go get it from my apartment.” Apparently, she had noted Amane’s interest in her old housekeeper. Mahiru gently pulled herself out of the loose hold of Amane’s arms, stood up, then looked at him with a grin. “Are you sure?” he asked. “You don’t have to go out of your way—” “You seem like you want to know what kind of person Miss Koyuki is. And I also want you to know more about her.” “Well, I mean, she’s basically the person who raised you…and she’s important to the girl I love, so of course I want to know about her.” “…There you go again. Geez.” Even though he was just being honest, Mahiru puffed her cheeks up, yet her eyes danced as she left the room, her slippers flapping against the floor as she went. She soon returned with the whole container of letters she had retrieved from wherever she had carefully stored them. She held the adorable box gingerly as if it were a baby. “I’m back,” she said, rushed, as she sat down on the sofa and placed the box on her knees. When she gently lifted the lid, he saw that she must have chosen the box to suit the size of the letters, because the envelopes fit perfectly in a neat little stack. On top of them was a single sheet of paper—a memo or something similar. As Amane admired Mahiru’s organized storage solution, Mahiru’s pale fingers avoided the memo as she felt around for a certain letter. It had a fancy, lacy envelope, and it looked like it had been cleanly opened with a letter opener so the contents could be easily removed. Mahiru pulled a single photograph out of the envelope. She held the glossy sheet out to him without a moment’s hesitation. The photograph depicted a woman smiling gently as she held up a baby wrapped in a blanket. If Amane had to say, the woman with the gentle expression was probably older than his parents. She appeared to be filled with joy as she looked down at the baby in her arms, yet her smile was modest. “This woman here is Miss Koyuki. She’s apparently living with her son and his wife now and doting on her grandchild. Her son took this photo.” “So that’s why she’s holding a little baby… I knew it—there’s something about her that reminds me of you, Mahiru.” “I think you’re imagining things. We aren’t even slightly blood related.” It pained Amane because he could almost hear Mahiru’s heart continuing on about how wonderful it would have been if they were, but Amane didn’t want her to see how emotional he was getting, and he kept talking in the clearest voice he could muster. “Mm, what I’m talking about doesn’t have anything to do with blood relation, though. I think when people spend a lot of time together, they start to resemble each other. The way they talk and the way they think. You know, their gestures and stuff.” Amane really didn’t think biology was the only thing that made a person who they were. Certainly, Mahiru’s genes were one of the factors that had shaped her, but Amane was even more certain after seeing the photo that the person who had supported Mahiru and made her the person she was now was Miss Koyuki. “At the very least, your smile is just like hers in this picture.” Mahiru had probably never considered how her smile looked to others. She really disliked having her photo taken. She didn’t take pictures of herself, and whenever she knew she was having her photo taken, she usually plastered on a fake smile. Mahiru probably had no idea what she looked like when she smiled alone with Amane. Though he was a little hesitant, Amane picked up his phone, scrolled through his pictures until he found what he was looking for, and handed the phone to Mahiru. He had taken the photo while the two of them were together and Mahiru was smiling happily, and while she let him snap the picture, her embarrassment had prevented her from ever looking at it. Considering her privacy, he had refrained from looking at it, too, which he now saw was a mistake. Once he looked at the photo, it was clear that Mahiru shared several traits with Miss Koyuki. “See, you’re both smiling so beautifully. Look here—the way you raise the corners of your mouth, and the look in your eyes, and the way you lower the outer edges of your eyes. I think you’re surprisingly similar. These are just photos, but your whole vibe is just like hers.” Displayed there on his screen was Mahiru, wearing a beautiful, contented smile that was just as gentle as Miss Koyuki’s, looking like she had amassed all the world’s happiness in one place. Mahiru stared at the screen, where she was seeing for the first time her own genuine smile. Then she touched her cheek incredulously as she looked back and forth between the photo of herself and the photo of Miss Koyuki. “…No one’s ever told me that before.” “That’s because you never had anyone see you like that before, isn’t it? You would never know if the two of you were only looking at each other—you wouldn’t notice the resemblance. Once I meet her, I’ll probably think you look even more like her.” It wasn’t something he could judge just from a photograph, but Amane was sure his prediction was accurate. “…I do look like her,” Mahiru muttered, like she was contemplating and digesting Amane’s words. There was a tenderness in her trembling voice as she quietly said, “I’m glad,” and let out a sigh as she leaned against Amane’s arm. Mahiru’s head hung as she pressed her forehead against him, rubbing against his arm. From the position he was sitting in, Amane couldn’t see her face, but he could tell without looking that the expression on it wasn’t a negative one. Amane smiled at Mahiru, who was holding the photograph against her chest so that she wouldn’t wrinkle it, and they cuddled close together until Mahiru was satisfied. “Mahiru, you dropped something.” Mahiru raised her head, her cheeks already curved up in her usual smile—perhaps with just a little more pride—as she ever so carefully put the photo back in its original place. When she did, the memo that had been resting on top of the collection of letters slipped off, so Amane innocently picked it up. It just so happened that when he did, the side with writing was facing up, and his eyes inadvertently followed the lines of ink. Written there, in smooth handwriting that did not belong to Mahiru, were neat, skillful characters. There was one line of romaji, one line of numbers, and one line that was a mixture of numbers, kanji, and hiragana. The lines were so short that Amane had already read everything before he realized he shouldn’t be looking. He averted his eyes from the memo in a panic and set it gently on Mahiru’s treasure box. “Thank you.” Mahiru, who was smiling at him cherubically, didn’t seem to notice Amane’s inner turmoil. She thanked him genuinely, closed the lid of the box, and held it close to herself. Mahiru had gone out of her way to show him something and someone precious to her. Amane was keenly aware of how much Mahiru admired Miss Koyuki. Mahiru was reflecting on the happiness she was feeling, and Amane patted her on the head as he tried to ignore the growing guilt within himself. “…What should I do?”
Chapter 197
31 min read