Chapter 169

Chapter 4 “What Do You Mean, Spoil…Aughhh!” Said the RPG Boss. What? That Never Happened? Child Masato, Santa Mamako, and Shiraaase were walking down the main aisle of the deserted toy store. “Other than you still being in that Santa outfit, I’m genuinely grateful. Mom, you and Deathmother really saved us.” “I had a feeling you were in trouble, Ma-kun. But there just wasn’t time to make anything, so I had to serve premade snacks… Oh, but I saved some for you! They’ll have to wait for tomorrow.” “Tomorrow…? Oh, Christmas. I guess today is Christmas Eve.” “Strictly speaking, it isn’t Christmas Eve yet. The fir tree decorations are still incomplete. Once the star is placed on top, we can make it Christmas Eve immediately…but first, this way.” Shiraaase stopped before an EMPLOYEES ONLY door and held up her admin ID. The door unlocked. Up ahead was a staircase that led down. Their footsteps echoed as they nervously descended to the stock management area. Dozens of one-way lines ran across the floor, and the magic hands that selected and wrapped stock were all at a standstill. Nothing was moving. There was nobody here. Shiraaase stroked the shelves, empty of merchandise, looking around her. “Seems like all the presents have been sent out to parents around the world—I mean, to Santa Claus. We don’t need to worry about safe delivery. However…” “The other matter is still a concern.” Child Masato scrambled around, searching under the shelves, at the base of the magic hands, under the stairs, anywhere he could fit, but found nothing. Santa Mamako was standing on her tiptoes, checking all the high places. “Nothing up here, either…” “Hey! Stop that!” He’d caught an unfortunate glimpse of her Christmas panties. “Masato, you mentioned these spider fairies, but are you sure they were spiders?” “They vanished pretty quick, so I couldn’t inspect them thoroughly, but that’s what they looked like. The spider part, at least. The fairy thing was just something Amante said.” “I see, so they’re definitely spiders. Interesting.” Shiraaase bent her knees, crawling around with child Masato. Checking carefully to see if any of these creatures were here. “…Not often we see you taking things this seriously, Shiraaase.” “I feel like that’s a slightly rude statement, but well…this is a serious situation. Not a matter that can be easily overlooked. It could be quite grave.” “You’re right… It is Christmas, after all. And whether Hahako and the Libere Kings can become family depends on the outcome… We need to be careful and make sure nothing bad happens…” “Spiders that enhance your desire to be spoiled…spiders…spoiders…spoilers…that’s such a forced pun! I can’t just dismiss it!” “Is that what’s bothering you?” Masato really didn’t care, but this appeared to be life or death for Shiraaase. “Ma-kun, I can’t find anything that looks like a clue.” “Me neither. I guess we’ll have to talk to the girls, but…” Child Masato and Santa Mamako looked at each other and groaned in unison. That was easier said than done. When the three of them got back to the giant fir, they beheld a horrific sight. “Please! Stop! Don’t be mean to Porta! Leave my adorable child alone!” “Calm yourself. This is necessary.” Hahako had her white hands extended, physically restraining the frantic Dark-Mom Deathmother. Porta, Wise, and Medhi lay before them. The shop costumes had been removed, but their hands were bound behind their backs, and they were placed on their knees on the snow. None of them looked happy about this, but the three Kings were standing in front of them, all holding a mug and a spoon in each hand. “If you don’t want to suffer longer, tell us what you know,” demanded child Amante. “This is your final warning.” “I told you already! If you want us to talk, you’ve gotta spoil us first!” shouted Wise. “How did you three end up like thiiiiis? What haaaappened?” “Why should I talk to people who don’t even understand the benefits of spoiling?” replied Medhi. “Porta, where’d Mone go? Spit it out,” said child Fratello. “Mone is fine! Don’t worry about her!” “Sigh…you leave us with no choice. Torture it is!” Child Amante stirred the contents of the mug. She carefully scooped up a spoonful of black liquid. “W-wait, what the heck is that?!” “You’re not going to poison us, are you…?!” “Nooo! Please don’t!” No mercy. Three hands reached out, squeezed the brainwashed girls’ noses, and the moment their mouths opened, in went the spoons! “““Blehhh.…so bitter…””” Oh, did they suffer. “What are you guys even doing?” “See for yourself.” Masato took the proffered mug and sniffed it. Then he took a sip of the black liquid. It was black coffee. Very grown up. “They keep going on about how sweet spoiling is, so we’re giving them something bitter! Hoping the two flavors will balance out and they’ll go back to normal.” “Argh! Sweets! Give me something sweet! I don’t care what! My mouth is dying!” wailed Wise. “Sheesh, you’re still going on about that? Enough already!” “Amante, here.” Masato shoved a spoon in little Amante’s mouth. “Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitter!” Massive damage to her ten-year-old tongue. She was defeated. Either way, he didn’t like seeing his party trussed up. Masato and Dark-Mom Deathmother untied all of them. They then handed out Christmas cupcakes Santa Mamako had made, to purify their mouths. The girls were delighted. “Spoilerifically sweet!” It seemed like they’d behave themselves as long as the sweets kept coming. “So no improvements here. Ugh… What do we do? They were injected with something, so I think they need an antidote, but—” “Don’t be ridiculous. We don’t need any antidotes! We’re not poisoned at all!” “In my opinion as a specialized healer, there’s no need for an antidote.” “I also don’t think we need to use recovery items!” “And you’re the three people in charge of all the party healing, so…we’re at a loss.” “Don’t worry! I, Shiraaase, can infooorm you that I have an idea.” Shiraaase stepped forward confidently. So confidently, it was extremely worrisome. “We must bet on a Christmas miracle! It is Christmas, after all. A most wonderful time of year! Don’t you agree? You all agree, right?” “So you have no plan…” “It’s agreed, then. Place the last ornament and transform the giant fir into a true Christmas tree. The Christmas event will officially begin! …Porta, would you help?” “Yes! Christmas is a time for sweets and spoiling, and I’m happy to help with that!” Her motives were unswayed, but she was cooperating. Porta opened her shoulder bag, and the sail-sized gold star shot out. Child Sorella was in charge of placing it. They tied a rope to the star, dangling it from the giant tome, and carried it to the top of the fir. “Masatoooo! Is this gooood? What do you thiiiink?” “A bit to the right! A bit more! Perfect! If you just set it—” There was a squelch, and the gold star was docked. “That was a creepy sound…” “Yeaaah…” They had not rammed the tip of the tree up the star’s butt. They’d placed it properly. Ornaments, tinsel, and the star. The three decoration stages were done, and the giant fir became a Christmas tree. Somewhere in the distance, they heard bells ringing in celebration. In that moment, the world officially welcomed Christmas Eve. The sun set, night fell, and lights brighter than the stars flickered to life all across the ground. These lights were Christmas trees. Radiating out from the giant fir, across the Motherest Mountains, all trees transformed into Christmas trees. Lighting up in all kinds of colors, from the highest peaks to the valleys below, across the world, spreading farther and farther. “Wow…I figured Christmas was just for kids, but if you go all out like this, it is pretty impressive.” “We’re just getting started. The Christmas event has only just begun. Now, let’s go demand a miracle or two or three. No being a tightwad, make it snappy.” “I feel like if you put it like that, the spirit of Christmas will just get mad at you…” The first miracle occurred. All the bells on the giant fir began to ring. A joyous sound. And as they did, little Masato’s body began to grow. “Oh! I’m growing!” “You didn’t exactly behave yourself in the toy shop, but the four of you went around together, so you must have registered as good children. How very generous.” “Thanks for keeping the bar so low! Come on! Let’s make this the last spurt and be back to normal!” Masato strained every muscle in his body, willing himself to get bigger. The child clothes grew very tight, with top, bottom, and underwear all ripping! Masato was back to normal! He had regained the form of a fifteen-year-old boy! …Albeit nude. “Augh, noooooo! This is baaaaad!” “It’s a bit…” Avoid. “…hard to look directly at…” Avoid. “I-I-I-I’m not looking!” Glance. While the girls all looked away, Shiraaase approached with a ruler. “Stop that!” “No?” “What a shame.” Santa Mamako had whipped out her handbook to record her son’s growth, but he forbade that, too. Whatever. He hastily donned the gear Porta was throwing him, and he was back to normal. Mm. Wait. If I’m back to normal…are the Kings? Had they ripped out of their clothes, too? Amante’s sleekly muscled body, bursting out…Sorella’s significant assets, spilling free…Fratello’s modest behind, shaking… If he just glanced in their direction, he might well see all of that! “Tee-hee. Masato.” Grin. “No, I’m not thinking anything weird! Please. Trust me!” Hahako’s face had appeared less than an inch from his, and that smile was definitely not a genuine one. It was terrifying. Behind her the Libere crew were hastily getting dressed. All three were back to normal as well. “We’re all old enough that we don’t need a mother anymore! What a relief.” “But we definitely still qualify as kids. At any rate, our main problem has been dealt with. Hooray for Christmas miracles. And following on that, can we get—?” “Oh, Christmas tree! These girls are acting very odd! Could you please cure them?” “That’s what I was about to say, but fine.” The giant Christmas tree answered Santa Mamako’s request. Its glittering limbs rustled, and three human-shaped cookies came floating gently down. One to Wise, one to Medhi, and one to Porta. “Oh, I know these! Christmas cookies! Um…g-gin something.” “You clearly have no idea. These are gingerbread men. A mildly sweet cookie with plenty of ginger mixed into the dough. Sometimes they’re even hung from the tree.” “What a nice smell! I bet these taste good! I can’t wait to try them!” They all took a big bite. “““Mm!””” Squeals of delight echoed all around, and they took another bite. And another. As they devoured their cookies… Their eyes suddenly went wide. “Mmph! I fink I’m mmph mmph head is mmpph mmmph at last!” “I believe mmph mmph we can talk mmph mmph Masato mm-mm-mmph listen mmph!” “Mo-mmph-ne-mmph is in mmph mmmphhh trouble!” “How about you talk when your mouths are empty?” Munch, munch, gulp. Then the three girls swarmed Masato, beside themselves. “Listen! After we split up in Thermo, it all went wrong! Mone’s in a real bad state! She’s seriously messed up!” “Calm down. How bad are we talking?” “Her cravings went wild! She’d been trying too hard to go without spoiling, and couldn’t hold back anymore! I think something’s affecting her mind, too.” “Mone’s lost control? Uh-oh.” “And then a hole opened in her chest and we were all sucked in!” “And next thing we knew, we were in the toy shop and being forced to work! We were under some pretty intense mind control! And why didn’t you notice?! You’re so stupid, Masato!” “Don’t blame me! I thought something was up, but you kept saying you were fine! I figured out you were brainwashed eventually, so let me off the hook here! Also, where is Mone now?” “She’s right over there,” Hahako said, pointing to the top of the giant Christmas tree. A girl was floating in front of the gold star. “Whoa, this is amazing! The origin of Christmas! Spreading spoiling across the world! This is what I wanted…” He knew those clothes. But the gaping hole in her chest was wholly unfamiliar. It was Mone, with three sets of bat-like wings on her back. “Um, what the hell is that? Since when does she have wings? And she’s flying?! …Argh, and I’m supposed to be the hero of the heavens! I’m kind of jealous, honestly!” “Masato, you idiot! This is no time for jokes! Hey, Mone! What are you doing?” “Dark God Mammone! Stop fluttering around and come down here!” Mone reacted to that name, glancing their way—but only momentarily. She reached her arms out toward the gold star. The air in front of her trembled and was sucked into the hole…and the gold star grew distorted. Before long, it also disappeared into the hole. The bright glow of the giant Christmas tree began to fade. “Oh no!” Dark-Mom Deathmother wailed, firing up her tablet. “At this rate, Christmas will end! Shiraaase!” “I am aware. We must stop her.” Shiraaase opened her own device and began tapping on her keyboard. “What…is this?” “Removal of the decorations signals the end of Christmas!”