“Ohhhhhh arrrrrgh!” Sure enough, once the night after the solo stream had passed and the booze had completely left my system, I stayed nestled in bed, writhing in agony.
Upon waking up, I’d been groggy—and also hungover—but with my brain trying not to remember the previous night’s events, I’d been able to get myself upright. But after plugging in my phone and scrolling through social media...
Stream Summary
Popped some StroZero right at the start
Announced marriage to StroZero
Spoke passionately about using her colleague for you-know-what material
Proposed polygamous marriage to her two senpais to get a lesbian three-way
Was asked preference in lesbian porn by one senpai, gave a pretty yikes answer, then decided to do a collab with both senpais
StroZero so delicious!
Holy crap, this girl is actually crazy
After seeing all that, my mood had sunk like a destroyed battleship. It was already afternoon, but I still hadn’t eaten or drunk anything. Instead I remained firmly in bed, languishing in my suffering.
I-I can’t keep this up. Every time I try to calm down, my tomfoolery from yesterday flashes through my mind every few minutes! Someone save me... Someone release me from this embarrassment...
“Uh.” Suddenly, a solution came to mind—one that would, without a doubt, set me free.
That solution, however, happened to also be a temptation of the devil himself, one which was practically certain to lead into a new, dark chapter of my life. And the sun was still looking at me dead in the face. I couldn’t ever allow myself to lay hands on it at this hour.
Ahh, but I can hear that person calling my name. That beloved person...
Pshhh!
“Awright, let’s go! Time for a little guerilla collab stream, woohoo!”
: She's heeeeeeeeeeeere━━━(゜∀゜)━━━!!!!!
: Pshhh!
: Pshhh!
: omg everyone's opening their cans at once LMAO
: isn't this basically just a drinking party now
“Yeah! Drink up, everyone! Actually, I’ve been drinking since just past noon today, so I’m all ready!”
: Whaaaaa *concerned*
: She really does throw us total curveballs every time huh
: I came here bc I heard a VTuber declared a polygamous marriage to an inanimate object and members of the same sex
: I see. This must be what they call a diversified society /s
: T h e l a w s o f t h e s e i s o m e a n n o t h i n g !
“Sweet! Now that we’re all revved up, I’ll announce who I’m doing the collab with! Here today with us we have Mashiron!”
“Kon-mashiro, everyone! It’s me, Mashiro Irodori, also called Mashiron. I thought I was coming here for Awa-chan’s stream, but now this can of StroZero is here and I’m super confused.”
: lol
: treating her kid as literal strozero lol
: Oh hey it's Mashiron! You've collabed before too. You're good friends, huh?
: hey, mashiron! your kid has turned into a delinquent! she's making all of japan laugh so hard that we're hyperventilating, do something about it!
Mashiron was an illustrator in the third generation, like me, who used the boyish boku as her pronoun. The third generation had four people in it: me, Hikari-chan, Chami-chan, and Mashiron.
Her character was on the short side, with white skin, short silver hair that seemed to sparkle, and blue eyes that practically drew you into them. Her whole appearance, including her clothes, gave her an androgynous beauty—very arousing. Her streams had gained popularity because of how she would talk to her viewers in a relatively low, calm voice—but with scathing words—while drawing pictures. I’d known her since not only our debut, but before it. We’d already done several collabs too, and the comment section was always quite a bit more serene than when the second-genners showed up.
As for why we knew each other so well, it was as one comment before mentioned: Mashiron was also my mother, who had given me my “body.” That’s right! Mashiron was the illustrator who’d worked on the character design for my other self, Awayuki Kokorone! Given her position, we’d naturally become friends, and now we called one another by the nicknames Mashiron and Awa-chan. I couldn’t help being on cloud nine now that I was going to be collaborating with my senpais in the future, so to vent some of the excitement, I’d suggested an unscheduled collab to my longtime pal Mashiron!
“Today my goal is to use Mashiron to release everything I have pent up!” I announced.
“And suddenly I’m being made into a pleasure object. I cannot conceal my shock. Actually, can someone help me?”
: lol suddenly some outrageous remarks
: This girl doesn't even hesitate with someone she's had so many collabs with, all while pretending to be seiso
: First the alcohol, then her two senpais, and now her 3rd-gen friend... She's totally indiscriminate lmao
: One word out of her mouth and the comments turn into an ocean of laughter. practically solving worldwide water shortages here
: was that stream Mashiron's first time seeing her StroZero mode too?
“It was!” said Mashiron. “I was pretty surprised she’d been able to hide it for so long.”
“Well, today is special. Before I would always drink starting at night, once my stream was done. You were already asleep at the time, Mashiron.”
“Ah, right. Still, though, once I actually saw it, it was way crazier than I’d imagined. Since awa means bubble, you’re less Awa-chan and more Shuwa-chan now—like the sound of how fizzy StroZero is.”
“StroZero is very fizzy, hence the Shuwa-chan. Actually, from now on, whenever I’m in this mode, why don’t we call me Shuwa-chan?”
“Hmm... I feel like I’ve heard that somewhere before, but... Well, whatever! It’s cute, so it’s fine!”
: Shuwa-chan lol
: you're okay with that??? lol
: Schwa...? what is she now, a perverted muscle-bound macho action hero?
: no, she's a pervert on a high after drinking so much strozero
: I get the feeling this name'll stick
“Well, that’s enough of an intro,” I said. “Let’s do some Castella replies today!”
Castella was an anonymous message-sending service where listeners could write their questions and such as messages to streamers. Viewers were always happy to hear you replying to their questions, and for streamers who mainly did zatsudan streams, they were an especially effective tool for getting things more exciting, so it was one of those win-win services.
“I’m mainly gonna be answering the Castellas that came to me today!” I explained.
“And I’m sure everyone’s excited for it.”
“First message! Woohoo!”
“Woohoo.”
: gotcha!
: so is "woohoo" a thing you say now lol
: Mashiro-chan just gave up lmao
: Mashiron, never lose hope...
Q: What’s the most cans of StroZero you’ve ever drank in one session?
: omg starting out with the strozero questions i see lol
: Actually I bet that's ALL of the Castellas
: Personally picking out the relevant ones, huh...
“Oh, well, I don’t hold my liquor that well, so I don’t normally drink more than three cans in a day. But when I finally quit my job at that shitty exploitative company, I was so happy that I drank one tall can and five normal ones. Total of six. That’s why I’m a NEET right now.”
“LOL.”
: Where do I even start with that one!
: Never heard about you being a NEET before
: Well, she WAS basically streaming every day
: wait that's way too much... are you speedrunning the destruction of your liver?
: Were you okay the next day...?
“No, it was super yabai. When I woke up and tried to get out of bed, I immediately barfed and fell over again. I thought I was gonna drown myself.”
“You’re one yabai third-genner.”
: I know I shouldn't laugh but LOLLLL
: Mashiron is at a loss
: wait, so you not only ended your stream by barfing, you almost ended your life? *concerned*
: The Girl Who Almost Died during a Happy Toast
: The Girl Who Never Stopped Loving StroZero Even After It Tried to XXXX Her
“Actually, Shuwa-chan,” said Mashiron, “that’s like, really bad. And you’ve been drinking since noon today? Maybe you should give your liver a rest.”
“Hmm. Maybe you’re right.”
“You could ruin your health. I’d be really sad if that happened.”
: Her concern is so precious and pure
: they've been through thick and thin, that's probably why she's worried
: you really do love her huh!
: that love-filled warning <3
“Okay, then I’ll give my liver a break for all of tomorrow! That work?”
“But you’re streaming again tomorrow...”
“I am trying to stream every day, no matter what.”
“Must be rough to be a NEET and have nothing to do all day.”
: I feel that
: totally agree
: literally me
: omg you guys ;_;