* * * I snapped the shutter, over and over again. “You’re taking way too many photos, Yuuko!” Nazuna turned to me, growling. I grinned. “These’ll be worth a fortune.” “Excuse me?!” After that, we took turns and got a bunch more photos. Solo shots, two at a time, and we even asked passersby to get all three of us together. Yuzuki and Nazuna, who both seemed somewhat awkward in the morning, now seemed to have opened up completely. I was glad I’d decided to invite both of them after all. Looking at the photos on my camera roll, I couldn’t help but smile. It’s weird, I thought suddenly. Without this opportunity, the three of us wouldn’t be strolling along side by side like this. Yuzuki and Nazuna might have graduated just with the bare minimum of interaction as classmates, and nothing more. But after today, I felt certain. Both of them would look back on these kimono memories and smile. A soft breeze caressed the nape of my neck. It was still too early to call it dusk, but the day was definitely marching on. A dragonfly landed ever so softly on my shoulder. …Summer is about to end. The dragonfly left me with that whispered message, flitting off again. “Thanks,” I whispered back, smiling. It’s all right. I brought things full circle, in the end. While I was musing over that thought… “Now for the grand finale.” Nazuna held her phone up and waved me over. Yuzuki raised an eyebrow. “You’re still taking photos?” “Come on, just get in close.” When the three of us were all lined up together, Nazuna pointed her front camera at us. We appeared on the screen in our kimonos. I mean, duh. One last selfie, I guess. As I waited for the shutter sound… Ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-da… Ba-da-ba-da-ba-da-da… Instead, her phone began to emit a call tone. “Huh?” “Wha?” Before Yuzuki and I could process what was going on… “Nazuna? What are you…? Oh.” There he was, the boy I loved, his face filling the screen. “’Sup, Chitose?” Nazuna waved, phone angled high. I was still reeling from the sudden video call filling the screen. “Uh… Hi. Kind of an unusual sight to see all of you together…” Oh no. Just hearing his voice made my head swim. I hadn’t seen him since the day of the festival. I wasn’t mentally prepared. Saku was in a T-shirt. It looked like he was home, one foot up on the sofa. I could see a bit of bare knee, so he was wearing shorts. I couldn’t find the words to speak. Instead, I just silently observed everything. I stole a glance at Yuzuki. She was frozen, a fake smile on her face. Guess she wasn’t expecting this, either. Nazuna carried on, unconcerned with our feelings. “The three of us came to Kanazawa and went shopping. Then we rented kimonos and went sightseeing. Since we’re all dressed up, we want a cool guy to compliment us, right? What do you think, Chitose? Are we adorable? Do you love it?” “Don’t pressure me.” “Oh come on! Say something nice. I chose this kimono specifically to show to you, Chitose.” “You’ll just say anything, won’t you?” “All right, I’ll rephrase the question. Don’t we look way different from how we look at school?” “…Yeah, maybe a little?” “Yay! Made ya say it!” ““Hey!!!”” As Saku’s eyes slid away evasively, both Yuzuki and I yelped in indignation. Sure, he was doing his usual dry joking bit, but honestly… Yuzuki was the first to regain her composure and speak next. “Chitooose? When did you and Nazuna exchange contact info, I wonder?” Saku grinned awkwardly as he responded. “Well, about that… It happened around the stalker incident…” “Huh? So you were cheating while we were dating?” “I thought I might be able to get some clues!” “So chatting up Nazuna was like having a one-night stand, is that it?” “Hey, now, don’t make it sound sordid.” Nazuna interrupted just then. “Oh, Chitose… Was it just a one-night stand? But we’ve done it multiple times since then…” “You just call me on LINE every once in a while, right?” Yuzuki tutted and sighed. “So? No thoughts you’d like to share on me in my kimono?” Saku scratched his cheek at that. “I’ve seen you in a yukata a few times already, so I guess I’m a little used to the sight.” “…I’m hanging up.” “Just kidding! No matter how many times I see it, you’re still radiant, stunning, sexy…” “…Just so you know, that mean comment you just made really cut me deep.” “I’m sorry. You look amazing. It’s just a little embarrassing to be honest about how good you look when I’m on the spot.” “Hmm, I’m not sure you really mean it.” “What more do you want from me?” “Home cooking.” Yuzuki stopped glaring and suddenly adopted a relaxed, playful tone. “Let me try something I’ve never had cooked for me before.” “I’ll think about it, so please calm down.” “Hmm, okay.” Their exchange made me blink suddenly. I remembered the conversation we’d had earlier, while tasting the miso. Right… I’m sure hearing me talk about Saku’s miso soup made Yuzuki sad. She might have thought it was something he’d made just for her. I felt a bit awkward, like I’d done something wrong. But was it really something I needed to hide? It felt complicated. Lying about the soup and pretending I’d never had it would have felt dishonest, in a way. But this is like how I felt the day they went to the festival in yukata. That’s…how it is with us. One of us might end up holding certain experiences close to our hearts, only to realize that the other one also shared them. Then it feels like that experience isn’t just yours to treasure after all. While I was thinking about all of that… “Yuuko, put out your hand,” said Nazuna. I blinked in surprise at her. “Huh? What for?” “Just do it.” I held out my hand, confused, and she plonked her phone down into it. “Wait, Nazuna?!” “Hold it right; don’t show Chitose your nostrils.” “No! Hold on…!” I quickly brought the screen level with my face. Saku was smiling a sort of awkward-looking smile. Oh no. I didn’t want him to see me looking this flustered. I swallowed, frantically adjusting my bangs with my free hand. “Uh, nice weather out, huh?” “Why do you sound like a guest making small talk at a wedding?” “…?” The heck am I saying? I’m such a dope. I’ve been like this for a while… Why can’t I get it together? Up until recently, I used to skip up to Saku every morning. I used to grab his arm without thinking twice. I’d laze around alongside him at the beach. Now I’m too embarrassed to look him in the eye. This sucks. I figured things would be awkward after the rejection, but this…this was unbearable. “Yuuko…?” His voice. The timbre. The warmth of it. Just hearing my name in his voice made my heart throb. Happiness. Sadness. Regret. But I wanted more. Right…I get it. …I’m falling in love with Saku, all over again. The moment I realized this, my face was suddenly hot, and I looked down. Oh yikes. I was blushing for sure now. I looked down at the straps of my wooden geta, mashing my lips tightly together. Why? Why does it have to be like this? Of course, it’s normal to feel deflated, after what happened. But maybe almost losing Saku made me realize how much he actually meant to me. Maybe it was love that helped me find the less cool parts of myself for the first time. His honest words to me must have really touched my heart. The way he always tries to act so cool… I guess on some level, I was charmed by it. I didn’t want anyone else to take him away. I was so jealous, I felt like I was going to shatter into a million pieces. …Maybe all of that combined made me fall in love all over again. I’m sure it’s everything… Every part of me was drawn to him. Irrevocably. Hopelessly. “Yuuko?” Hearing his voice again, I slowly lifted my head. The Saku on the screen gently smiled. Thump… Thump… But my heartbeat was starting to slow. “How’ve you been?” “Good. You?” “Getting by.” “I see.” “Did you find any good clothes?” “Oh, loads.” “It looks a bit warm for kimonos still.” “Yeah. But it’s cooling down a bit now.” “Oh, yeah. it’s already the end of August.” “Yes, a dragonfly told me.” “Huh? That’s cool.” I’m sure Yuzuki and Nanase were worried, watching me. It’s awkward, isn’t it? Yeah. It’s definitely awkward. I guess it sounds that way, to anyone listening to our conversation. But I felt as relaxed as if we were sitting out on the veranda, enjoying a cool evening breeze. How can I describe the feeling right now? It’s not like I’m the one approaching Saku, saying, Check this out, you gotta hear this, guess what… He’s not just nodding along. For the first time, I feel like we’re having a real conversation. We’re not using many words, true. But that’s because we don’t need them. This summer, we overcame so much together. More than words could express. And in the end, I’m glad we can confirm that we’re back in this comfortable space together. So for now, this is fine. …Just being able to chat with you normally is all I could ask for. I signaled to Yuzuki and Nazuna with my eyes. Let’s wrap this up. I think he gets the picture. They both crammed in beside me, and I held the phone out farther to fit us all in. “Well, then,” I said. I knew what I wanted to say, with all my heart. “Bye, Saku. See you in the second semester.”
Chapter 100
9 min read