Chapter 1:
For Sisters to Become Strangers Again
THE MARRIAGE BETWEEN Duke Auld Loa Vahan and his late wife Bellerose was an arranged, political union. Bellerose was the one who pushed for it to happen, but once it was settled, Duke Auld desperately tried to make it work. Even though his marriage was forced upon him, he could find a way to love his new wife and create a real family…or so he’d hoped.
His hopes didn’t survive for very long.
Auld was a perfect beauty—tall, sculpted body, soft silver hair, and powerful eyes with an unforgettable gaze. High society women flocked around him, and Bellerose was one of them. As a woman of high standing, she used everything in her power to gain his favor. In the aristocratic world where loveless marriages were common, everyone wanted a happy ending, a marriage to someone they loved.
But Bellerose wasn’t satisfied with just a happy ending. She had married the man she loved, but she wanted Auld to love her back. Her insecurity led to such intense jealousy that she attacked any woman who came near him, even servants and business partners. She grew more and more controlling until she decided that her hardworking husband must be having a secret affair. Every day, she demanded explanations for everything he did.
“Who were you with?” Bellerose would scream.
“I was working,” he’d respond.
But she couldn’t believe him. “Lies. I know you were with some woman!”
She’d say, “I know everything.” Or she’d ask, “Why don’t you love me? I’m not good enough for you?” Or she’d demand, “Don’t look at anyone but me! I won’t let you leave me!” Auld tried to assuage her fears, but still she’d yell, “You are not allowed to think of anyone but me! It’s unforgivable!”
Worn down by Bellerose’s constant needling, Auld gave up on making a real family with her, and was driven into the arms of a comforting, supportive mistress.
Mistresses weren’t uncommon among aristocrats. A man might take a mistress if his first wife hadn’t given them an heir, and people trapped in loveless political marriages often sought real romance outside them. Some men, who simply couldn’t be satisfied by just one woman, sought several at once. An aristocrat in love with several people at once could easily pursue all their options. As long as Auld could support another family without issue, he had the right to open negotiations with her family.
For the Vahan household, these negotiations were an unmitigated disaster.
There was no way that obsessive, jealous Bellerose would allow Auld to take an official mistress. To escape Bellerose’s accusations, Auld frequently visited his mistress, which just fed Bellerose’s jealousy, which drove Auld even further from her. During one of the worst of these cycles, like some sort of cruel joke, Bellerose became pregnant.
That baby was Violette Rem Vahan.
She was an adorable girl with pale gray hair and round eyes like a kitten, and she bore a striking resemblance to her father. Bellerose was delighted to have a daughter who everyone said looked just like her beloved. With this child, Auld would surely return to her. Violette would be their connection. Bellerose loved her daughter intensely and pinned all her hopes on the little girl.
Of course, things didn’t go according to Bellerose’s plan.
Auld no longer loved Bellerose, and although he knew the child wasn’t to blame, the thought of seeing Bellerose again was too much. He invented excuse after excuse: the girl had a mother and a plethora of servants; she didn’t need him. Then they discovered that Auld’s mistress would also be giving him a child. Considering the circumstances, of course Auld wanted to settle down with them. But for Violette, that was the worst thing he could do.
Bellerose’s jealousy grew more distorted and hateful as the years wore on, right until the day she died.
In the beginning, she only loved Violette’s face. She kept her daughter by her side, protecting her face from even the smallest cuts or the lightest sunburns. Violette’s face was proof that Bellerose and Auld had been together, so she treasured it. She believed that one day, he would return to her.
But no matter how much time passed, he never came back. Bellerose grew impatient.
Her feelings for Violette changed. She ripped off the child’s frilly clothes and cut her long hair, doing her best to transform the young girl into a young boy. She made Violette look just like the photos of Auld as a boy.
It didn’t end with her appearance, either; Bellerose demanded that the girl not only look like a boy but act like one. Bellerose insisted Violette not learn how to behave like a lady, but instead that she be taught self-defense and weaponry… It wasn’t good enough for Violette to act like a boy; she had to be exactly like Auld.
But eventually, Violette’s femininity could no longer be hidden. No matter how much she resembled Auld, she would never be Auld. As her body matured, as their differences became more obvious, Violette was no longer the child Bellerose desired.
So, she completely lost interest. Now that Violette was clearly a young woman, her mother wouldn’t even look at her.
Bellerose’s health seemed to decline, and at first Violette was certain it was just a ploy to attract Auld’s attention. At some point, though, she did grow seriously ill. As she declined, the only one in her heart was Auld. Violette still had dreams about how easily her mother cast her aside.
And while Violette was still in mourning for her mother, her father officially married his mistress.
✦ ✦ ✦
Violette didn’t want to remember what happened next, but she couldn’t help it.
In her hate and anger toward her stepmother, her half sister, and her father, Violette committed a heinous crime. Looking back, she couldn’t help but want to apologize to Maryjune. She wanted to throw herself on the ground and grovel for forgiveness…but they would think she’d lost her mind.
Her heart ached, but it was a distant feeling. A part of her felt like she should be mourning her mother and furious over her family—an echo of how she must have felt the first time, her subconscious mind dazed and hurting.
She’d withstood the pain of being rejected by her parents, but the hatred for her half sister had been too much to hold in. She’d needed to vent those feelings somewhere.
“Lady Violette…are you all right?” Marin asked.
“Yes…I’m just a bit tired,” said Violette.
“I’ll bring you some hot milk to calm your nerves.”
Marin, Violette’s attendant maid, had looked uncomfortable during the whole exchange, shooting awkward glances at the mother and child brought so quickly into the house, and at Auld, who’d invited them in so easily.
The meeting had ended peacefully, despite Violette’s odd, standoffish behavior. Her father was hopefully too relieved that she hadn’t given the expected outburst to punish her for some minor impoliteness. They’d gotten through the first meeting peacefully, so hopefully her father would leave it at that.
“Sigh…”
After checking that Marin had left the room to prepare the hot milk, Violette let out a heavy sigh. She didn’t know how she got back here and probably wouldn’t be able to figure it out. Instead, she decided to focus more on what she would need to do going forward. Surely, Violette was given this second chance so that she could fix her mistakes and avoid becoming a criminal. But even though no one in this world knew what she had done, the guilt still plagued her. She was not going to make those mistakes again.
Violette made up her mind.
After graduation she would sever ties with her family, become a nun, and create a new path for herself in service of God. She didn’t need to be loved or treasured. She had already experienced firsthand the dangers of obsessing over things you couldn’t have. She would live and die an ordinary, simple, lonely life.
But first she needed to deal with Maryjune. She would be starting at Violette’s school soon. The old Violette had been cruel and vindictive, but this Violette would do better—instead of casting a shadow over Maryjune’s life, she would wish for her happiness from the bottom of her heart.
But this new dedication to Maryjune’s well-being didn’t come from love. Violette only wanted to ease her own guilty conscience.
“Lady Violette, here you are,” said Marin.
“Thanks, Marin… Ah, it’s warm,” said Violette.
Violette warmed her cold hands around the mug of hot milk. She didn’t realize how tense she’d been until it all left her stiff shoulders.
There’s so much happening…
She started the day in prison, then she was thrown backwards in time to the day when her life was turned upside down. They say that life is full of ups and downs, but this single day had enough to last a lifetime.
“I guess I really am tired. I think I’ll just go to bed,” said Violette.
“I shall help you change your clothes,” said Marin.
“I’ll do it myself… I’m sorry, but I want to be alone.”
“As you wish.”
She needed to organize her thoughts and think through her next steps. She and Maryjune would become sisters, whether she wanted it or not. She gulped the rest of the hot milk, left the bowing Marin, and disappeared into her room.