“Oh! That’s it, isn’t it?” she called out.
A building with a dark-brown wooden deck stood in the direction that Sayu was pointing.
“Yeah… I think so.”
The shop was a short walk from the airport and was located down a quiet side road off the main street.
“Wow. This feels like a proper café,” Sayu declared.
Seeing her excited made me smile.
“Well, it is a café, after all…” Even I thought my reply was a little silly. As I spoke, I opened the door.
It came as no surprise, considering the stylish exterior, but the shop’s decor was very chic. The walls and ceiling were made of real logs, giving the café a gentle and warm atmosphere, like that of a Scandinavian cabin.
Most of the tables were already occupied, but we were fortunate enough to be taken straight to our seats without having to wait.
Perhaps because of its calm atmosphere, the café didn’t seem noisy despite how busy it was—it would be a good place to relax.
“Wow… I never knew cafés were so elegant,” remarked Sayu.
“They’re not all as classy as this one. I’ve never been to one this fancy before.”
“Really?” Sayu asked, looking surprised.
I furrowed my brow. “Do I seem like the kinda guy who goes to trendy cafés?”
“Hmm, now that you mention it, not really…,” she said, an ambiguous look on her face. “I guess I just assumed everyone went to cafés all the time.”
I watched, unable to respond, as Sayu admitted this with a tinge of loneliness in her voice.
“Welcome, and thank you for stopping in today.”
The waiter had come by with menus and hot, moist towels.
Sayu beamed and took both.
“Hey, what are you going to order?” she asked me.
Her lonely expression from a few moments earlier had vanished, and she was now happily browsing the menu.
“I think I’ll have a regular coffee.”
“Iced or hot?” she asked.
“Hot, I guess.”
When I drank canned coffee, I tended to pick the iced kind. Now that I was at a café, though, I felt like I might as well drink it hot. I wondered why I felt that way.
Even though I was the one thinking it, I never fully understood what I meant by might as well. Did I have some reason for this vague notion that hot coffee would provide a richer experience?
As I pondered this, Sayu pointed energetically at something on the menu. She must have made her decision, too.
“I’ll have this!”
“A matcha au lait?” I asked.
“Yep. I thought I might as well get something sweet, since I’m at a café.”
“Pfft!”
I couldn’t hold back my laughter. Sayu cocked her head and made a questioning sound.
“Oh, nothing.”
It struck me as humorous that Sayu had said the very words I was just thinking about, and yet our might as wells had led in two very different directions. Smiling, I called out to the waiter.
“Excuse me!”
Once our drinks arrived, we dove right in without a word.
When Sayu took her first sip, her eyes sparkled, and she exclaimed, “It’s so sweet and delicious!” Soon, though, she had completely calmed down, and she was now looking out the window at the scenery, drinking her matcha au lait with a peaceful expression.
The café had a very pleasant atmosphere, with easy-listening folk music playing in the background and the other customers speaking in hushed tones, like the rustling of leaves.
“About what I was saying earlier…,” Sayu said slowly, breaking the silence. “…My brother would occasionally take me to a café, but those are the only times I’ve been.” She was still staring out the window.
That lonely expression was back.
She continued little by little, as if remembering something from long ago.
“Mom would get mad at me if I didn’t head straight home after school, and I wasn’t usually allowed to leave the house on weekends, so…I never even thought about going to cafés when I was in high school.”
She began idly stirring her matcha au lait with her straw as she spoke.
The light-green liquid and the layer of white whipped cream on top began to blend together until the boundary was no longer distinguishable.
“When I came to Tokyo and started wandering aimlessly around the city, I’d see high school girls…on friend dates at cafés.” Her eyes narrowed as she recalled the sight. “I remember thinking, Oh, right… High schoolers go to cafés, don’t they?”
The way she said this made my heart ache.
Sayu was a high schooler, too, but she seemed to feel a psychological detachment from “ordinary high schoolers.”
When she first arrived at my place, I often got the impression she was holding back much more than was necessary. However, it wouldn’t surprise me if that was because she’d been suppressed time and again when she was younger. This realization made me feel utterly helpless.
I couldn’t bring myself to say anything, until at last Sayu turned away from the window to look at me again.
Smiling, she said shyly, “That’s why I’m glad…that I could come here with you, not for some errand, but just to hang out.”
“…Really?” I managed to squeeze out a reply. “That’s good, then.”
“Yeah.”
I felt sure that what she’d just said—that she was happy to come here with me—was what she really felt.
After all, Sayu had stopped using smiles to cover up her real feelings.
That said, I hoped that in the future, after we’d parted ways, she’d be able to walk into this kind of place like it was nothing, without any big emotions at play.
Sayu seemed to be enjoying relaxing at the café, occasionally stirring her matcha au lait with her straw like she wasn’t sure what else to do.
I’d initially intended to stay quiet until Sayu decided to say something…but she was so calm that I found myself speaking up without thinking.
“Aren’t you scared of going home?” I asked.
Sayu turned to meet my gaze and blinked a few times.
Then, with a troubled smile, she said, “Of course I am.”
Her response came so easily, I was amazed.
Sayu giggled, unable to stifle her laughter at my surprised look.
“Of course I’m scared. That’s why you came with me.”
“I know that… I just didn’t expect you to be this chill,” I explained.
Sayu smiled faintly and looked down at the table.
Then she nodded a few times.
“That’s true, I am. Now that I’m actually here, I’m calmer than I thought I’d be.” She stirred her drink again. “I’ve always known I’d have to go home someday…”
I kept watching her as she looked down into her glass, where her straw was still swirling around.
“Now that ‘someday’ is here,” she said.
I felt goose bumps rise on my skin.
I was acting like I was worried about Sayu, but in a way, I’d actually been underestimating her.
She’d made up her mind a long time ago.