Side Story:
Diplomacy
THE SECOND WEEK IN OUR JOURNEY THROUGH THE Wolfsbrook Mountain Range saw us venturing deep into its depths, where we began to see creatures I didn’t even know existed. Things like giant dragonflies straight out of ancient Earth. Okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, but they were still about the size of a small dog.
In any case, they were larger than little Van’s tiny face, okay?
One such giant bug flew right in front of me. “Gah!”
There was nothing strange about me crying out in fear. A perfectly normal reaction for a virtuous child such as myself. But Panamera looked at me and cackled. “Afraid of bugs, are we, boy?”
She was just having a laugh, but a wave of embarrassment washed over me. It made me try to act tough. “Huh? No, of course not. Bugs are nothing to me. Psh, I’m not a kid!”
I shrugged bravely and gracefully turned to Panamera…only for a brown spider bigger than my head to materialize right in front of my face.
“Eek!”
It was massive, at least sixty centimeters in size, so there was nothing shameful or strange about me screaming. But Panamera apparently thought it was hilarious. “Ha ha ha!” she laughed, holding her stomach.
Upon closer inspection, the spider was already dead; it had a hole in its stomach from a sword. She must have swiftly killed the creature as it descended from a tree. A remarkable show of skill, but super nasty of her to just leave the corpse there for me to find.
I’d love to know how her mind works, I thought, glaring at Panamera. The shock of this whole spider incident had put me in a bad mood. Well, actually, since the human brain is composed of muscles…it’s probably just muscles.
She grinned. “Oh, did I upset you?”
“Not at all,” I replied, turning away.
But that just caused Panamera to laugh harder.
“Ha ha ha! You can be so cute! Now, now, don’t get angry. I apologize.”
Her relaxed tone made me want to toss a snide comment or two her way, but when I turned back around, I was confronted by the stomach of a giant spider. I screamed again.
“Eek!”
Seeing me leap in fear, Panamera laughed as though something inside of her had broken. “Ha ha ha ha ha!” She was a natural-born bully.
“I am so done with you! I’m not selling you weapons or arrows anymore!” I announced.
Panamera patted me on the back, laughing all the while. “Come on, don’t be so upset! I would be at a loss without your weapons. I promise to pay extra next time, so please forgive me!”
She was apologizing, but she spoke like someone who was looking down on me. She was literally treating me like a child. If that was how she wanted to play it, I’d just have to use her own words against her. “In that case, from now on you’re paying me double!”
✦ ✦ ✦
“Ha ha ha! That’s a bit much! I’ll settle for a fifty percent increase!”
“Okay, then fifty percent it is. You asked for that, so I’m not letting you go back on your word.”
Hearing how serious I was, Panamera’s eyes widened. “Wait, surely you’re joking? I apologize for teasing you,” she said, slightly panicked.
But there was no way I was letting her off that easy. “Nope. Apology not accepted. Fifty percent increase. Case closed,” I said, drawing a line under it.
Panamera drew her chin inward. “At least make it a ten percent increase. Even the current prices are difficult for me right now, fiscally speaking. If we weren’t in the middle of a war, I would be in the red.”
Panamera’s expression changed as she began to negotiate with me. I burst into laughter and looked up at her. “Fine, I guess I have no choice. I’ll let you go with a ten percent increase.”
Panamera nodded seriously. “I-I am grateful, but…” she began, but then she noticed that something was off. She narrowed her eyes at me, looking skeptical. “Don’t tell me this was your aim all along?”
“Huh? Whatever could you mean?” I replied, trying to play it off.
She sighed. “I take back what I said. You are not the least bit cute. If anything, you are rather annoying.”
“That’s mean.”
“You stole the words right out of my mouth.” Panamera shook her head and frowned. “I swear… You have a lot of nerve manipulating adults at your age in order to make money. You’re going to be an awful man when you get older.”
“As a lord, it is my number one priority to make my territory prosperous. But with that said, I don’t plan to neglect my one and only ally.” I smiled. “I will aid you in any way I can, outside of this little deal. Just ask me, and I shall deliver.”
Panamera shot me an exasperated look, but it faded into a smile. She sighed. “Right. In that case, I want you to help me acquire my own territory,” she said, starting to chuckle again.
“Are you sure you’re good with something so simple?”
Panamera froze, wide-eyed. Seeing this reaction, I remembered that she was a member of Count Ferdinatto’s faction; there were likely all kinds of covert deals and workings I was not privy to.
Time to backpedal. “I’m just kidding. Having your own territory can be tough, you know.” I was smiling, but Panamera drew close, looking all too serious.
“Boy, do not deceive me. Do you have some sort of plan?”
“Why would I? I’m only nine.”
“That’s what I mean. I have never once thought of you as a nine-year-old.”
“That’s terrible. You make it sound like I’m some old man.”
“Do you not realize that that very response makes you sound old? No, that is not the issue at hand. What do I need to do to acquire my own territory? No matter how many accomplishments I add to my name…”
“J-just calm down!”
We continued to talk things over as we marched through the mountain range. To overhear us, you would never think we were headed to war given the topic we were discussing. Apparently I wasn’t the only one who thought so, either, because rumors began to spread among the other Chivalric Orders that Baron Van was surprisingly courageous.
And they didn’t mean that in terms of my willingness to go to the front lines. They were referring to my ability to forge an advantageous relationship with Viscount Panamera.
Just how terrified of the woman were they?