Home / Defeating the Demon Lord’s a Cinch (If You’ve Got a Ringer) / Chapter 6

Chapter 6

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He’s obviously messing with me. He said himself that this wasn’t over yet. “Creio, you bastard… You knew I’d be cut from the party, didn’t you?” “Naotsugu Toudou wanted a female priest. That’s all I knew. There is a reason for everything. There is a reason why Toudou asked for female party members, why the schools of magic and swordsmanship submitted novice warriors, and why we chose you, Ares.” This isn’t efficient at all. It’s completely counterproductive. I don’t need all the false pretenses of this useless conversation. Just give me the hard facts. “This is your job. If you hadn’t been thrown out, the situation might have been simpler. But this is business, and we are overruling the hero’s order. You know well that the only thing that matters in business is results, don’t you, Ares?” I know in this moment that I misjudged the difficulty of my mission. The glass in my hand cracks under the strain of my grip. “Support Naotsugu Toudou and defeat the Demon Lord. We can’t afford to invest in another priest because of the foolish self-interest of the hero. Ares, this is what you’re good at. It’s your field of expertise.” “…Damn… I’m shorthanded here.” Creio responds promptly, as if he knew what I would say. “We are investing in you, Ares. May you be a faithful priest. And may God bless you.” “Go to hell!” The transmission cuts out, and the noise of the dining hall comes back. I understand—this is a trial. The greatest obstacle I have encountered so far. I need to carry this business through to the end, no matter what it takes. I catch a glimpse of ferocity in my reflection in the window. I have to support Toudou from outside the party and make sure he defeats the Demon Lord. I mobilize immediately. I leave the inn and head for the church. The first thing I need to do is follow Toudou’s trail and figure out where he’s headed. If I’m going to support him from the shadows, I’ll need to stay one step ahead. Fortunately, I can guess what he’ll do next. Toudou doesn’t really have common knowledge of our world, and he may not have liked me, but he still listened to my advice. It’s likely he’ll heed my final warnings. He’s looking for a priest. Where will he go to do that? If a mercenary party was looking for a priest, they might go to the tavern. But Toudou is the Holy Warrior, and for him, there’s an easier option. On my way, I stop at a clothing shop and purchase a hooded brown coat to hide myself. I also find a shop selling masks. There’s a mask with crescent-shaped cutouts for the eyes and mouth. It would look highly suspicious, but right after being expelled from the party, showing my face to Toudou would be a bad idea. I hesitate a minute and then purchase it and put it away in my pocket. It’s always best to be prepared. The church is located in a crowded area on the main street of the village. Its walls are painted white, and on top of the steeple, there is a monument—a cross resembling a scale, the symbol of the God of Order. The church is a home to priests and a lifeline to ordinary townspeople. There is at least one in every town and village, and a high-level priest is dispatched by the Church headquarters to watch over each house of God. The role of that priest is to heal the wounded and sick, to assist with level ups, to certify new priests, to remove curses, and to proselytize. In some places, the role of the resident priest includes assisting other priests who want to increase their faith. The time for morning prayer has long passed, but the church is crowded with people. I check that Toudou and the others aren’t nearby. Then I call out to the sister sweeping in front of the church. “Sister, there’s something I’d like to ask you.” “Yes… Ah!” The young sister turns to me and jumps with a start. Our eyes meet, and she looks like she’s about to cry. I suppose the look in my eyes might be a bit frightening… I point to the earring on my left ear. “I was born with these eyes, sister. I’m not gonna bite you.” “Ah… P-pardon me!” She hurries to bow her head after seeing the evidence that I am also of the Church. In front of the church, there are many watchful eyes, which makes things a little troublesome for me. “If you could please lift your head. There’s something I’d like to ask you.” “Um, all right…,” she says, slowly lifting her head. “What is it?” She examines me with interest, but I ignore it. “I’m looking for someone. I heard he was headed for the church. Have you seen a man with unusually dark hair and eyes?” At that point, the sister’s expression changes. She fumbles with the handle of the broom and looks downward. “Ah… Yes… I saw him just an hour ago. It seems he came here to speak with the father.” “An hour ago, huh? I just missed him…” Well, maybe it’s my good luck that I did. It’s not like I wanted to come in direct contact with him. “Did he say anything to you?” “Um… Well, yes. He invited me to join his party,” she says, blushing a little. The wind blows her wavy brown hair over her face. Toudou isn’t a bad-looking guy, so a girl like her, probably an amateur priest, might take a liking to him and get swept up in it. “Did you accept?” “N-no, no! I couldn’t! I’m still very new to the faith…” The lowest-level earring hangs from her ear. This sister probably can’t even perform the level-up ritual yet. But she should have completed her studies of the basic healing spells and buffs. And her face isn’t half-bad, either. If this sister joined the party, it would be relatively stable. On the other hand, the burden of leveling up would increase, and there is still the fundamental risk that when female priests lose their virginity, they are no longer able to perform miracles… I debate whether I should advise her to join the party— “I see. Is the father here?” “Ah, yes… He’s inside.” —and decide to leave it up to fate. I would feel badly for the girl, but I’m prepared to sacrifice a lot of lambs. If she did lose her ability to perform miracles, it might at least make Toudou reflect on the situation he has put himself in. I head inside. The church warden is kneeling silently in the chapel. He has blond hair and wears jet-black priest’s robes. He appears to be five or six years older than me. I catch a glimpse of his cleric’s earring. As I come closer, the man quietly gets to his feet. “Do you require something of this church?” he asks without turning. His voice carries through the chapel. “I’m looking for someone.” “…So I’ve been told.” He turns around. His features are exposed in the sunlight pouring through the stained glass windows. His eyes are the same golden color as his hair, and there’s a deep scar on his cheek. Perhaps he used to be a mercenary. He examines me with a narrowed gaze. He finds the proof of my priesthood on my left ear, then notices the ring on my left ring finger. “My name is Ares Crown.” “It’s an honor to meet you, Sir Ares. I’ve heard your story. My name is Helios Endell.” Creio was clear that the Church has no plans to intercede…but does this mean that he has taken steps to help find another priest? Helios smiles softly. Behind his gentle voice, I sense something suspicious. This may be my personal bias, but I have the impression that many of the high-level priests in the priesthood are good-for-nothings—more so among priests than among mercenaries. “Sir Toudou came to us not long ago.” “Looking for a priest?” “Yes…though I politely refused.” Helios shakes his head as if it amuses him. His golden eyes look almost transparent, and he gives an impression of unpredictability. His refusal doesn’t surprise me. While it is one of the Church’s roles to mediate on behalf of priests, there are certain standards that must be met. If the party composition, ability level, and character of the members do not meet those standards, a priest’s services will not be offered. If a man comes along with two women looking for a female priest for his party, no matter how he asks, that is unlikely to be granted. These kinds of ill-conceived groups turn up on occasion, and I doubt they have ever been passed. Though I wonder how much this guy knows about Toudou. Does he know that he’s the Holy Warrior? “I see. How did he respond?” “He was quite indignant…but he intends to return tomorrow to take the priest’s exam.” I see… Once Toudou realized he wouldn’t be able to get a priest for his party, he decided to take the exam. It’s a logical step. Anyway, I’m glad for the extra time it gives me. Even if I’m going to be supporting them from outside the party, there isn’t much I can do for the moment. At the very least, I need to think of a way to track their movements from a distance. I’d rather die than wear that shady mask around. “…Is everything all right?” asks Helios, looking at me curiously. The fact that he’s a cleric means he must be at least level 50. If I could get this man to join Toudou’s party, I might feel reassured, but that probably isn’t an option. “…Do you think Toudou will pass?” “…Hmmm.” Helios puts a hand to his chin and contemplates for a moment. “…Well, it may be difficult for him. Although he can perform the techniques, his holy energy is low.” “I’m of the same opinion.” While Toudou does know the minimum necessary holy techniques for the exam, his total amount of holy energy is also a factor. His current level is certainly not enough to withstand consecutive casting. Helios gives a superficial smile at my reply. “My goodness…what an honor.” “If he’s taking the exam tomorrow, it’s unlikely he’ll leave the village today, don’t you think?” “Yes, indeed… That gives you a little time.” “…Thanks for the help.” The priest’s exam can be taken at essentially any time. I’m grateful for the extra day. Helios continues, smile unchanged, after my short thank-you. “It was an order from the Church authorities to delay it by a day… I have also received a message for you, Ares.” “A message? …What is it?” “It is, ‘Someone has been dispatched.’” I recall my conversation with Creio that morning. Was he being serious or not? “Understood. Did they tell you the meeting place?” “The inn from this morning, I was told.” “What kind of person am I looking for?” “You’ll know when you see them, they said.” I’ll know… I want to voice my criticisms of that vague statement, but Helios couldn’t do anything about it anyway. “Got it. Thanks for your help.” “No trouble at all… May God bless you, Ares.” “I may ask for your help again in the future.” Helios opens his arms wide in an exaggerated gesture. “Ask anything of me that you require, honored crusader. As a servant of God, it is my great privilege to be of help to you.” I consider what the hero may have decided to do after Helios refused him. Did he return to the inn? Is he replenishing supplies? Or is he selling the raw materials from monster hunting? I must be putting more thought into what the hero is doing than anyone else in the world at this moment. How is it that I’m the one who has to think about the guy who just sent me packing, like I’m a young girl with a crush? I set Toudou aside temporarily and head back to the inn to meet Creio’s contact. I check at the front desk to see if anyone has come asking for me, and I’m told someone is waiting for me in the dining hall. If they can dispatch someone this quickly, I wish they’d send a priest for the hero’s party. It’s in between mealtimes, so there is hardly anyone in the dining hall. I peek inside, searching for this person I’m supposed to know on sight. There’s a group of four and a group of three that have been drinking since morning, as well as a pair in the middle of a heated argument, spit flying between them. The person I’m looking for should be alone, so it isn’t any of them. There is a girl with indigo-blue hair sitting by herself. She wears a light-gray dress-like garment, but as she lacks a priest’s earring, it can’t be her, either. From her delicate figure, I can guess she isn’t a mercenary, so what on earth is she doing at a cheap inn like this? I survey the dining hall for a few more seconds, and finally, my eyes are drawn to a priest sitting alone. No—it isn’t a priest. He’s a bald middle-aged man, body as muscled as Thomas’s, the mercenary who destroyed the glacial plant. His dark eyes and tanned skin give off an aura of toughness, and the hardness of his face suits his large, masculine build. You can feel the ferocity in his gaze. The silver cross of a low-level priest hangs from his left ear, but next to it is a narrow gold rectangle. This shows that he isn’t just an ordinary priest but a monk, who trains his physical body for his faith in God. A monk, huh… Not bad at all. I nod to myself. This man seems like he will be a reliable resource. He’s strong, and he’s got a tough exterior that mercenaries will take seriously. Toudou and the others would respect him as well. You heed the advice of a man who looks like this. On the other hand, monks tend to have less advanced holy techniques than the average priest. But since I’m well versed in them, as long as he can use the fundamentals, it shouldn’t be any problem. I wondered who they would send, but to lend us a monk… I guess Creio wasn’t lying when he said he was “investing” in me. “You’ll know when you see them.” Yeah, he was sure right about that. Just to be certain, I look around the room once more, but there isn’t anyone else it could be. I wait for the right moment and then walk up next to the man. He notices my appearance at his side and looks at me. His eyes are clear and gray. The pale scars on his face are evidence of his experience in battle. He eyes go first to my earring and then to the black ring on my left hand. “My name is Ares Crown. Sorry to be so abrupt, but you’re the person who’s waiting for me, right?” “…You’re a crusader…?” He has a deep, husky voice that matches his exterior. He casts his vision upward again and glances at my face. “Dallas Blank—monk.” “I see, you’re Dallas. I know it’s sudden, but can we get right to the point?” It seems that luck is finally on my side in this mission. As I go to sit down across from Dallas, he frowns. “…Sorry, but I think you’ve got the wrong guy. I’m not waiting for anyone.” “…What?” My eyes widen. I wasn’t expecting this response. How could he be the wrong guy? He’s the only priest here. As I stand there confused, a voice calls out from behind me. A voice very different from Dallas’s. “Mr. Ares, I’m the one you’re meeting.” “…Huh?” I don’t want to turn around, but at the same time, I know I have to. I finally give in, and who’s standing in front of me but the blue-haired girl I saw when I entered. She looks nothing like a mercenary, her body so delicate that she might snap in half if you squeezed her too tightly. She appears to be a year or two younger than me. She wears a dress and has perfectly straight dark-blue hair that matches her eyes. But most importantly, she doesn’t wear a priest’s earring or a ring that shows her marriage to God. She seems self-assured and determined, and she looks at me with an emotionless gaze. I reflexively look back and forth between Dallas and the girl. What is happening here? As I look imploringly at Dallas, he sighs. “Looks like you found who you were looking for.” “Really…?” “Really,” confirms the girl, pushing her hair off her face in a terse gesture. …“You’ll know when you see them”? I turn back to the girl. She faces me with a cold, almost disdainful look. Okay, I get it. She’s strong-willed. Now…what do I do with her? “…Mind if I send a message and come right back?” “Go ahead.” My optimism was short-lived indeed. The difference between the two of them is…extreme. The hero is looking for a priest. Why did they send this girl? I decide to make my objections to Creio. I head to a corner of the dining hall and start the transmission. Normally it connects right away, but this time, it takes a few seconds. The person on the line isn’t the usual operator, and she seems flustered. I can hear a lot of noise in the background—has something happened at headquarters? “Ah… Uh… H-hello! You’ve reached the Church headquarters!” “This is Ares. Connect me to Cardinal Creio.” “Yes, certainly, Mr. Ares! I’m, um, I’m the n-new operator. My name is S-Stephenne Veronide. Pleased to make your a-acquaintance!” Who is this girl, and what the hell happened to the regular operator? She’s frustrating me already, but that’s the nature of new employees. Right now, I just need to get in contact with Creio. “Stephenne, I’m Ares Crown. Nice to meet you. Can you connect me to Creio, please?” “Y-yes, of course! C-certainly!” “Just connect me to Creio.” “Ah, y-yes! Understood!” So unproductive… I wait for about a minute, listening to the flurry of noise in the background, and finally, Creio comes on the line. Why did it take so long just to link the transmission? “Ares, has something happened again? This is…not a good time.” “It’s about the person you sent. This chick isn’t even a priest.” No matter how you look at it, I’ve been cheated here. She isn’t a priest, isn’t strongly built, and the only thing I can think to use her for is as a lure to catch monsters. After first seeing the monk, it’s even more aggravating. But, well, that was my mistake… Creio’s response surprises me. “Hmm? She isn’t wearing the earring? Well, she must have just taken it off. She is absolutely a priest, as you well know.” Must have taken it off? The rule is supposed to be that priests remove the earring only when sleeping and bathing… I glance at the girl sitting stick straight in her chair. Well, even if she is a priest— “Didn’t you decide not to invest in a female priest? And by the way, I don’t know this chick.” “…Hmm? That’s strange… She said that she’s met you…” She’s as attractive as Limis and Aria—the type that stands out in a crowd—and she has the look of a nobleman’s daughter. I’m confident I would remember if I’d met her before. Not to mention that I hardly ever visit the Church headquarters. My head swells with questions, but I ignore all of them except one. “Can she…endure this kind of journey?” It won’t be easy to support the mission to defeat the Demon Lord. You can expect a physical and mental burden. Creio responded, sounding irritated. “Ask her that yourself. Ares, you come to me with too many complaints. I am, first and foremost, a cardinal…” “Well, I’m not just complaining for the sake of complaining.” “Hmm…” Creio pauses for a moment. “I am placing my trust in you. If you requested a different person, it’s not like I wouldn’t consider it,” he says thoughtfully. “…Who’ve you got?” “A sister named Stephenne Veronide. She possesses both high magical power and high holy energy, and she’s the youngest person we’ve ever had as an operator… She’s something of a prodigy. She’s still inexperienced, but you could help with that, couldn’t you?” That’s the name of that hyper sister from before. Fuck. I get the feeling our personalities wouldn’t mesh well. To the point that I don’t even want to interact with her as an operator. “…She seems like she’d be more of a burden than a help. Or maybe I should say I just don’t think we’d get along.” “There’s one more person available. I didn’t mention it because I’m fairly certain you’ll refuse, but…” There’s someone worse than Stephenne, huh? What the hell is going on with the Church…? I wait silently for Creio to continue. “He’s also a member of Out Crusade. His nickname is the Mad Eater, the Exterminator—” “FUCK!” I shout involuntarily, then hurriedly glance around me. Thankfully, no one is paying me any mind. I know this guy. I know his real name, and I know his face. I’ve even been on a mission with him. Gregorio Legins—the crusader who goes by the nickname the Mad Eater and is so obsessed with eradication techniques that he’s no longer capable of other holy rites. He’s thrown all his faith into offense and is absurdly strong. He’s the only priest I know with a stronger offense than me. “He’s not the kind of man to work under someone. And I’ve always thought he should be banished from Out Crusade.” “Is that so?” That’s the kind of guy who’ll get you killed. He’s been out of his mind since the day he got the nickname the Mad Eater. I sigh loudly enough that it can be heard on the other end of the transmission and look over at the girl Creio sent. Compared to the other two candidates, she may actually be preferable. “Well, try to make do with who we dispatched. If more personnel open up, I’ll send them your way, but we’re shorthanded right now.” “…Got it.” There’s no point pestering him if they have no one else to offer. Anyway, I initially didn’t think they’d send anyone at all. Just before I cut the transmission, I ask something that’s been on my mind. “By the way, about the change in personnel—what happened to the usual operator?” “…Hmm?” The operator before Stephenne was far better suited for the job. If it takes Stephenne a full minute to connect a transmission under normal circumstances, how would she even manage in an emergency? “What happened to her?” he repeats flatly, as if it was a foolish question. “I sent her to you, didn’t I?” Sent…her…? “…No way.” Well, that explains it. The blue-haired girl is the operator. We’ve been associating for so long through the transmissions, and I thought that her voice sounded familiar… How could I be so stupid?! “…But why did you send me someone from the office?” Without answering my question, Creio cuts the transmission. Piece of shit. I stare at the wall for a moment, dumbfounded. I quietly cast a status ailment recovery spell to calm the churning pain in my stomach. I can’t help but feel like lately I’ve been using holy techniques for all the wrong purposes. Taking no notice of me, the operator sits with her eyes closed, her posture so perfect she almost looks like a doll. She appears totally sedate, unbothered by the noise of the dining hall. It matches the impression I had of her over the transmissions. People have aptitudes for different things. To be calm, unemotional, and able to exchange only the minimum conversation might be excellent qualities for an operator, but I doubt they’ll be useful on this mission. Besides, she comes from administrative work. Although the fact that she worked in the office at the Church headquarters means she did well, I don’t know how long she can last in the field. Intelligence is useless if you can’t keep your body moving. Before sitting down at her table, I observe her intently. It’s unlikely she volunteered for this thankless job. She was probably forced to come here under Creio’s orders. From her perspective, this mission probably feels like a demotion. When I think about it that way, I feel a sense of kinship with her as a comrade who has also had to accept his superior’s unreasonable demands. Of course, just because I say I feel a kinship with her doesn’t mean I’ll be soft on her… Facing her, I clear my throat, and her eyes slowly open. She looks at me, motionless. “I’m Ares Crown.” “I know.” She responds flatly, barely smiling. Regrettably, she seems to like me even less than Limis and Aria. I wonder if we’ll be able to work well together. “…Right. I suppose you would know. We’ve been associated for a few years through the transmissions. Thanks for your assistance there, by the way. But this is the first time we’ve met in person, isn’t it?” She frowns so faintly that you’d miss it if you weren’t paying attention. “…It isn’t. We’ve met…once before.” “…Have we?” I have no memory of it. I openly study her face. She has soft features and long eyelashes. Her eyes and shoulder-length hair are such a deep blue that they look almost black. She has an average-size chest, but the daintiness of the rest of her body makes it look larger. She’s tall for a girl and probably a little younger than me. She is a level of beautiful one doesn’t see often in an area like this. She fidgets a little under my scrutiny. I don’t recognize her, and I don’t even know her name. I stare for ten more seconds, searching for her face in my memory before raising both hands in surrender. “I give up. Sorry, I can’t seem to remember.” “Is that so…?” she mumbles, her voice sounding the slightest bit disappointed. I may not have noticed these things if this had been our first conversation. I wonder what she’ll think if she discovers I don’t even know her name. I vaguely remember her introducing herself over the first transmission, but never having had occasion to use her name, I can’t recall it. I think for a moment, then sit up straight and extend my right hand. “Let’s introduce ourselves again. I’m Ares Crown, and as you know, I was a crusader.” She looks reproachfully at my outstretched hand. Perhaps she expresses more emotion than I thought. She stares for a minute and then finally puts out her hand. Perhaps from the office work, it’s white, like it has hardly seen the sun. “Operator at the Magical Coordination Department in the Church of Ahz Gried…Amelia Nohman. As you know, I was your operator. By order of my superiors, as of today, I am to support you on your mission.” “Thanks for coming, Amelia. Look forward to working with you,” I say, pretending not to notice that she seems upset. Incidentally, hearing her name didn’t ring any bells. It could be that whenever we met I didn’t have the mental space to remember it. The Magical Coordination Department—the department that brings together the divine miracles of the Church and the miracles of magic. It’s a specialized division within the Church, but rather than priests, those who work there are called holy casters. Magical power and holy power. Those who can use those two conflicting energies are the elite of the elite within the Church. I reexamine my unexpected companion. I hadn’t realized that the transmission operator is under the jurisdiction of the Magical Coordination Department. It could be beneficial to have a holy caster. I start to envision a path forward. I may have also figured out the reason Amelia was dispatched. “What level are you?” “I’m level fifty-five.” That’s considerably high for someone who worked in an office. I involuntarily gasp in amazement. Generally, priests over level 50 can use the more powerful holy techniques, and from that point, they are called high priests. Not bad. Not bad at all. Even without any attack power, with her level of holy power, she could stand in for me. “Where is your priest’s earring?” “I have it.” She produces a white cloth bag and shows me a priest’s earring and a white ring. The earring isn’t the one that low-level priests wear. It’s a silver cross and a smaller gold cross combined—a cleric’s earring, like the one Helios wore. Helios was cooperative but not the kind of person who would be useful to me. This girl is different. I can’t help but have high expectations for her. I stiffen my expression and ask, “Why weren’t you wearing it?”

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