Chapter 45

EPILOGUE The next day—Shinra’s apartment It was midday after the weeklong holiday. The afternoon variety shows announced that three street attackers had been arrested. Two of them were copycats. One was a self-styled OPD fan who was hated by most other fans because of his extremist nature. The other was a woman who attacked OPD online and delivered various statements about the harm it posed to media companies for dissemination. The police were continuing their investigation into the woman, whom they believed might have coconspirators among her organization. They were both injured and terrified and making bizarre statements like, “The Headless Rider is a street attacker” and “The devil showed up,” so the investigation was taking into account the possibility that they were under the influence of illicit drugs of some kind. But what really shocked the audience was the fact that the police investigation turned up the “original” attacker, as well. The culprit was a new hostess at a club, who learned that the man who’d given her the most humiliating rejection of her life was romantically involved with another hostess there. So she grabbed some clothes at home that would hide her face and attacked the two of them. “And once the true culprit is found, it turns out to be something frivolous like this,” typed Celty, dropping her shoulders like she was sighing. “It wasn’t the influence of manga or any nonsense like that. Just generic human jealousy. These things can be scary,” Shinra said. “But still, the woman was an OPD fan, right? Does that mean people will take it out on OPD after all?” “I’m not sure. The two copycats both said they had the idea after seeing it reported on the media, so if the media tries to bash it too hard, that blame will come back around to them. I’m guessing it’ll get swept under the rug. For one thing, the leader of the most extreme anti-OPD groups was one of the people doing the attacks.” “It’s an ugly world out there. But I guess you’re right. Just because the first person to start doing this was a hostess doesn’t mean society’s going to go on an anti-hostess screed,” Celty typed, causing Shinra to laugh. “Yeah, that’s right. If they want a target to blame, it’s human jealousy. It’s the original human sin. Even I suffer from it.” “If I cheated on you, would you dress up in cosplay and beat people up?” “I’d never do that. And I’ve calmed down a lot in the last few days,” he reassured her. It was true that his manner was much gentler now. “Then what would you do?” Celty asked. “…I’d cry really hard. Just wail so loudly. There would be a fully grown man standing outside Ikebukuro Station in the middle of the day, bawling his eyes out and calling your name over and over.” “You’re going to make everyone feel bad! Don’t do that! Anyway…I get the sense we’ve had this conversation before…,” Celty typed, but she felt relieved on the inside. Things had been so chaotic since they came back from vacation. Maybe life was finally returning to normal for them. On the TV, the news was talking about the arrest of the attackers, while online, people were going nuts over the group of Dark Owls that had showed up around Ikebukuro Station. As she read an article about it, she asked Shinra, “Who do you suppose did this? They didn’t hurt anyone, and they ran off when the police showed up, so I guess it was just a prank.” Shinra thought it over, scowled slightly, then guessed. “It was probably Aoba’s group, right? From what you say, the Blue Squares are working with some online news portal to drum up fake stories. Wouldn’t this count?” Shinra’s supposition was exactly correct, though neither of them had the evidence on hand to know it was true. “Maybe it’s some kind of public art project from the Underars.” “I suppose it’s the work of Bannanjin, the demonic hammer…” “Y-you don’t think it’s an alien conspiracy, do you?” They traded different ideas, until the thought of Kuon drifted through Celty’s mind. He sure managed to screw everything up this time. I suppose he enjoys conspiracies, too. Between Izaya, Mikado, Aoba, and Kuon, what is it with Raira Academy and attracting guys who fancy themselves masterminds? Anyway, Kuon is sweet and harmless compared to Izaya. After all, he and Shizuo wrecked up the town ever since their high school days… At that thought, Celty’s mind went blank. “I forgot about Shizuo!” “Huh?” “I handed the attacker over to Karisawa and Yumasaki!” The relaxed feeling she had just moments ago was totally gone, and Celty slumped onto the sofa. “Oh, geez… How should I apologize to him…?” Raira Academy rooftop—after school “You look sleepy, Yahiro.” “Do I?” “You do,” said Himeka, her face blank. They were sitting near the edge of the roof, where Yahiro was explaining everything that happened. He didn’t mention Kuon, but he described in full detail everything regarding the fight against the street attacker. “Uh-huh…but how did you know that woman was the attacker?” “Well, she was looking our way, and there was this, like, hatred in her manner…like she was going to come and take a swing at us… I thought for sure it was because of me. It was the sort of look I got in Akita all the time,” said Yahiro. He was worried that his cover had been blown in the faked kidnapping case and the group of culprits was coming after him for revenge. Or maybe he’d hurt the woman’s family back in Akita, and she was out to get him for it. But after he broke off from the others and realized the hostile feeling was gone, it occurred to him that either Yumasaki or Karisawa was the one in danger and decided to go back and check on them, threat of street attacks or not. “In the past, someone who looked at me like that threw a Molotov cocktail…so it made me worry about them,” Yahiro said. “So basically, you just happened to catch the eye of that person by coincidence.” “Um, no? I was looking at everyone around me, so it was more like I found her…” “Huh?” Himeka exclaimed, baffled. “Well…I’ve been attacked in public all the time since I was a kid…so I developed a habit of looking at everyone I see, just to observe what they’re like,” Yahiro admitted casually. “So when you’re walking around, you’re worried that every single person you pass might be an enemy?” she asked, aghast. “Does that mean you keep an eye out here on the roof, just in case someone comes up to attack us?” “Yeah,” he said. Himeka exhaled heavily and grinned just a little bit. “You really are strange.” “You think so?” “I do.” She smiled gently. “Oh… I guess I really am that weird.” Then Yahiro asked her thoughts about one more thing—about the combination of the hostility he felt while fighting against the street attacker and the joy he’d gotten out of the situation. She heard him out until he was finished, and she didn’t say anything for a while. She thought about it long and hard before replying, “Let’s say that you killed me right now. Would you enjoy that?” “No way.” “What about Kuon? Or all the other people on the roof you were watching out for?” “I don’t even want to imagine it,” Yahiro replied earnestly. “Then I think you’re fine for now.” “Oh, okay.” “I’m not some psychology expert, but you have plenty of people you can talk to, so as long as you get it off your chest to someone else and don’t hold those feelings inside forever, that alone should help change you, shouldn’t it?” Although her facial expression was flat, he could tell that she was taking his concerns quite seriously. Yahiro grinned slightly, acknowledging the warmth of her words. “…That makes sense. Thanks. I’ll try talking to Kuon about it, too.” “Ah, so you’re finally on a first-name basis with him.” “Yeah. We talked it over,” Yahiro explained, then found himself racked with concern for Kuon. He said he was skipping school today to go to the dentist… I hope he’s doing all right, he thought, worried that the injuries he personally inflicted might cause his friend to pass out again. A park in Ikebukuro As a matter of fact, Kuon had passed out. But it wasn’t because of Yahiro’s punch. He’d been hit by a completely different guy and laid out on the ground. A few minutes earlier, Kuon was standing before Shizuo and his bandaged friend Tom, as they took a break in the park. “Yo, Shizuo and…Tom, was it? I heard about your head wound.” “What? You’re that Yahiro kid’s friend, aren’t you?” said Shizuo skeptically and gruffly. Tom asked, “How did you know about my injury?” “How could I not? I was the one who got the attacker worked up and led them to attack you,” Kuon admitted, just like that. Then he began to tell Shizuo all about what he’d done. He bragged, gloated, even brought up Shizuo’s brother, trying to get him mad. And to no surprise, he succeeded at getting Shizuo to explode with fury. And as Shizuo rounded on him, intent on violence, Kuon thought, This is right. This is what I deserve. Horada had always been an adversary, so there was no need to apologize to him. He wasn’t going that far to try to make himself a good person. But Tom didn’t deserve what happened to him. Kuon decided that in order to settle that account, he needed to pay the proper price or else he wasn’t worth his salt as a scheming mastermind. And he would certainly never surpass Izaya Orihara. So this action required him to sacrifice himself. If I die here…I’m sorry, Sis. He envisioned his sister’s face as Shizuo loomed. And then Kuon ended up on the ground. But it wasn’t because he’d taken one of Shizuo’s tremendous punches to the face. It was because Tom interjected and socked Kuon in the face instead. He’d taken one punch from Yahiro and now a twisting punch from above. Kuon hadn’t been expecting it and couldn’t even tense up before the force knocked him flat. “Tom, why…?” gasped Shizuo. “I’m the one who suffered because of him,” Tom said. “So I hit him. Got a problem with that?” This was not like the usual Tom. His gaze brooked no argument. Shizuo understood his intention and let his anger dissipate. He shook his head. “…No. No problem.” And back to the present. “Why did you tell us? You could’ve stayed quiet, let it pass, and nothing would’ve come of it,” said Tom, who couldn’t understand Kuon’s actions. From the ground, he answered, “I got lectured by a very nosy urban legend, that’s why… Would you believe that?” Kuon wasn’t lying, but he intended it to come off as confrontational. For whatever reason, he didn’t feel like lying about his motivation, so instead he spoke of Yahiro as the “urban legend” Snake Hands, turning the truth into a challenge to be deciphered. He expected them to consider his answer a joke and for Shizuo to explode with fury again—but the two debt collectors just looked at each other, then nodded with understanding. Lastly, before he left, Shizuo said, “Fine. In honor of that urban legend, I’ll let you go for today.” After they left, Kuon lay on the park ground, rubbing his cheek. Ugh, that hurts… I think I might’ve broken another damn tooth… Although if Shizuo had hit me, I might actually have died… “…Wha—?” Kuon abruptly realized why Tom had hit him. “Wait…was that Tom guy…protecting me?” As a matter of fact, punching Kuon first, as Tom did, might have been the only way to defuse Shizuo in that situation. In other words, the man had just saved the person responsible for his own injuries. “Shit…dammit…dammit!” He rolled his head back, covered his eyes with his arm, and felt shame at his own powerlessness. Through bloodied lips, he admonished himself. “This is why…I hate humanity.” “Sorry about that, Tom.” “About what?” “If I’d gone through with it, I wouldn’t have been able to get away with saying, ‘My bad.’ Besides, the way he talked, it sounded like Celty told him to come here and fess up about what he did.” “Don’t worry about it. I wanted to wrap that one up myself. Would have preferred to punch the goddamn street attacker myself, but I’ll let the cops have that one,” Tom said with a shrug. He scowled and balled his fist, staring at it. “It’s been so long since I hit someone… I don’t think I broke anything, but my hand sure hurts like hell.” Shizuo suggested, “Want to go visit him for help again? He can’t do X-rays, though.” Shinra’s apartment—an hour later When Celty returned, Shizuo and Tom were just leaving. “Hey, Celty.” “Sh-Shizuo!” Dammit! I wasn’t ready for this encounter! Well, guess I just have to apologize… She was getting ready to type her apology out when Shizuo bowed deeply to her. “Thank you. Sounds like you were doing a lot for us behind the scenes.” Huh? She didn’t know what he was talking about. Tom added, “Honestly, I thought you’d have brought the guy to us all trussed up on a rope, but you convinced him to show up in person… That’s impressive work.” Huh? Wha…? Eh? “Well, we gotta get back to work. We’ll find a way to show our appreciation some other time.” They patted the thoroughly confused Celty on the shoulder as they walked past, smiling gratefully, and returned to their office. That left Celty standing in the entryway of the apartment, completely baffled. What…? What’s going on here?! Had she simply lost a big chunk of her memory and not realized it? The thought of being abducted by a UFO and having her memory tampered with left her feeling haggard and violated, and she rushed to Shinra for comfort… But that is a story for another time.