Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky had often been depressed about it too. The thing was, he actually didn’t like repeatedly writing all the crazy revenge stuff either, especially when it was getting revenge on a crowd of villains with IQs lower than a bar on the ground. Once in a while, he wanted to craft a three-dimensional villain—still cannon fodder, but with multiple sides—to show that he had also done some basic research on human nature, that he had some literary standards too.
But the readers never bought in. So he couldn’t guarantee he’d make a living.
So, what did human nature and literary ideals count for against readers and making a living? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Back on topic. Precisely because of this bad plot-cutting habit, many of the original particulars of the story had been lost, doomed to suffocate in the womb. For example…
When had Mobei-Jun captured Shang Qinghua?!
Naturally, the main text had never brought it up. The main text’s plotline was just Bing-ge oozing badassery, slaughtering and massacring people all over the place—who gave a fuck how that one cannon fodder became a spy?
However, this world automatically filled in the parts that had been cut. Therefore, “Great Master” Airplane had categorically lost the authorial advantage of foreknowledge. Therefore, whenever the plot began to develop, he was always a good few beats late before he caught on to what was going on.
X-shixiong drew his sword (which, as an An Ding disciple, had never had the chance to be unsheathed even after eight hundred years), and let out a vigorous yell. “What sort of evildoer dares to cross us?!”
One after another, the disciples all became agitated, and they subsequently unsheathed their swords as well.
“You dare to appear in front of Cang Qiong Mountain Sect disciples!”
Mobei-Jun was clearly in an extraordinarily bad mood. He didn’t even let the cannon fodder finish their traditional opening monologues before his knuckles cracked.
A storm of icy arrows swept through the air, and heads slammed to the ground one by one.
One side of Shang Qinghua’s mind shrieked while the other howled: So scary! But also so cool! Really fucking cool!
But regardless of whether he was cool enough to shake the heavens and earth, and to make devils and deities cry, if that guy was destined to kill Shang Qinghua in the future, he was absolutely not friend material!
Suddenly, X-shixiong shoved his shoulder. “Get down there!”
Shang Qinghua felt like his heart was being fried in oil and roasted over a fire, but his mind was wholly sober. He stuck his hands and feet to the cart as securely as chewing gum. “Get down and do what?”
“Defeat the demon and defend the righteous way! Execute the will of the heavens!”
Why don’t you go first? thought Shang Qinghua. “After you, Shixiong!”
X-shixiong flew into a rage. “I told you to go, so go! What’s with your nonsense?!”
More hands and feet joined X-shixiong in kicking and prying Shang Qinghua off. Obviously he understood what was going on—these outer disciples just wanted him to stall Mobei-Jun to give them time to escape. His mind was as clear as a mirror, and his current stance couldn’t have been any more fixed.
Shang Qinghua clung firmly to his base of operations and refused to be moved. “Shixiong, I don’t wanna!” he sobbed. “Our comrades will remember how you made me go be cannon fodder at a time like this!”
X-shixiong began to ramble incoherently in terror. “What cannon fodder? If you can defeat this monster of the demon race, you’ll definitely earn great merit—you’ll soar like the divine steed, Feihuang. This is the only way out for us outer disciples. The opportunity is right in front of your eyes at this very moment!”
Shang Qinghua couldn’t hold on to the cart much longer. He whimpered like his organs were being ripped apart. “I’m going, then. I’m really going!”
Just as he finished speaking, he was firmly pried out of the cart and thrown to the ground.
His body: fallen right in front of Mobei-Jun’s boots. His sword: still halfway in its sheath. His heart: not quite decided as to whether he should draw his sword.
Mobei-Jun sneered, an ice-cold glint of blue flashing through his eyes. No sooner said than done, Shang Qinghua threw himself forward to cling to his thighs with a plop.
Every one of his shixiong made an aggrieved face.
Mobei-Jun made a blank one.
Shang Qinghua fell to one knee. “My king, please let me follow you for the rest of my life!”
Mobei-Jun tried to throw Shang Qinghua off with a kick, but to no avail—his adhesive ability was just too strong. Mobei-Jun then tried to kill him and be done with it, but that proved even more difficult. Just like a gecko clinging to the wall, Shang Qinghua nimbly crawled back and forth but managed to stay stuck firmly to his thighs.
Mobei-Jun couldn’t help but steam with rage.
As the An Ding Peak outer disciples bore witness to this incredible feat, they were overjoyed. They threw down their goods and fled. Just as Shang Qinghua was silently cursing them out, not three seconds later, a wave of screams came from down the road.
Dozens of ice strands as thin as silk threads had pierced their chests. In a mad dance of silver light, droplets of blood flew in all directions.
Upon seeing this, Shang Qinghua’s grip on Mobei-Jun’s thighs became as strong as steel. He started to chatter incessantly, “My king, please accept me. I’m very useful!”
Mobei-Jun seemed to cant his body. “Oh? What use are you?”
“I can serve tea, carry water, wash clothes, fold blankets…wait, no.” Shang Qinghua considerately gave him an analysis: “You see, my king, I can serve you as an undercover agent in Cang Qiong Mountain, pass on intelligence, and help the demon race accomplish the magnificent feat of conquering the Human Realm.”
Mobei-Jun laughed. “An outer disciple, and an An Ding Peak outer disciple at that. With you as a spy, how long would it take to accomplish this feat?”
“Don’t discriminate against my peak,” Shang Qinghua said awkwardly. “That isn’t very nice.”
Why does even the demon race look down on us? And the disdain for “An Ding Peak” even surpasses that for an “outer disciple”… That’s too much, that’s really too much!
As Shang Qinghua overflowed with snot and tears, clinging on for dear life, begging to pledge fealty to Mobei-Jun—wholly without warning, the demon collapsed.
Shang Qinghua was still hugging his thighs, and when Mobei-Jun fell, he was almost squashed right under him. He hurriedly let go. He crouched there for a while in a daze until he suddenly came to his senses. Had Mobei-Jun come here already injured?
No wonder his expression had been so ugly and his temper so high, and no wonder he had been so easy to push over! Had Shang Qinghua accidentally poked one of his wounds when his hand slipped? Sometimes a slip of the hand is advantageous!
Shang Qinghua cautiously moved over to examine him carefully. Just as expected, there was a thin wound the length of a finger on the back of Mobei-Jun’s lower waist, roughly over his right kidney. A sharp corner of something gold protruded from inside the wound. He could vaguely make out that it was the petal-shaped edge of an intricate piece of handicraft that had been forged from gold threads.
So coquettish and cultured. It was Huan Hua Palace’s Ling Hua Dart, all right!
This weapon was one of the nonsense details “Great Master” Airplane had cooked up on the fly while writing. The body of the dart was light and thin and coated with a bit of anesthetic, so it was very difficult for its targets to discover the object once it breached their body. If they moved too much, the dart would magnificently “blossom,” growing six sharp flower petals to slice up the victim’s internal organs.
Does this perhaps sound a bit familiar? Doesn’t this device overlap with a certain Demon Realm organism? No problem; it’s easy enough to justify. Just explain it away by saying this Ling Hua Dart was created by some Huan Hua Palace senior who’d escaped from the Demon Realm by the skin of their teeth, then based this design on a strange organism called Ties That Bind. In short, don’t make a fuss over this sort of tiny detail!
Background narration complete, let’s jerk ourselves back over to the main topic. That is to say, this pure-blooded demonic second-gen who, in the future, would very likely beat Shang Qinghua to death with a single strike; not only had his kidney been punctured through by Huan Hua Palace, he was also severely anesthetized.