“Mama!” The village burned behind him as the boy searched through the wreckage, wailing in sorrow. Lying lifeless amid ruins was the burnt-black corpse of a woman, still warm to the touch…
Lu Xu flinched back with a gasp, his breath quickening.
Mergen opened his eyes. He looked up at Lu Xu and winked mysteriously. “You’re the only one who’s seen that. Don’t tell anyone else.”
Lu Xu was at a loss for words. Mergen took his hand and placed it back on his brow, and the white light bloomed once again.
Young Mergen tore across the plains on the back of a wolf, the rest of the pack loping behind him. The Milky Way cascaded like a waterfall across the night sky as he looked toward the horizon; amid those glittering stars, the white deer bounded toward him from the heavens…
It was a long time later when Mergen woke again. Lu Xu retracted his hand and gazed deeply at Mergen, as if stunned.
“Done.” Mergen exhaled a long breath. His head throbbed slightly as he sat up and descended into a thoughtful silence.
“Who was that?” Lu Xu asked.
“My mother,” said Mergen with a smile. “You saw her too, right? She was a beautiful woman.”
Lu Xu couldn’t connect that burnt body to the mother who existed in Mergen’s memories, no matter how he tried. “What happened?” he asked uneasily.
“My father wasn’t there when my mother gave birth to me. I grew up in the Arghun tribe. On the day I was born, they said, all the wolves on the plains prowled over, surrounding the village.”
A deep furrow appeared between Lu Xu’s brows. Mergen peeled off his outer and inner robes, baring the tanned expanse of his chest, and changed into the garments of coarse cloth set out on the table. As he faced the mirror to tie his belt, he met Lu Xu’s eyes in the reflection. “My mother told me I was born covered with fur, which I gradually shed. She thought I was a yao’s failed reincarnation. The elders of my tribe saw me as a monster. After the Arghun tribe was slaughtered, I left the northwest plains near Wolun Lake and traveled to Shiwei with my mother’s token, hoping to find my father. An elderly shaman in the tribe insisted I was the gray wolf’s reincarnation. He told me to journey to Hengshan Gorge.”
“But Hongjun told me you have four younger brothers,” Lu Xu said.
“We all have different mothers,” Mergen explained pleasantly. He held his hand up, palm down. “The youngest is just this tall.”
Mergen was always smiling; Lu Xu hadn’t expected such a tragic past to be lurking in his dreams.
“That’s why I should go,” Mergen said, following Lu Xu’s train of thought. “The heavenly demon should be quite interested in my past.”
“Did you find the people who murdered your mother to avenge her?” Lu Xu asked.
“Let’s go.” Mergen said, looking away. “Change into these clothes, and we’ll head out together.”
The ship swayed as it sailed out of the Wei and onto the waters of the Yellow River, which raged as heavy winds blew. Hongjun spent a whole day and night recovering from their activities. Li Jinglong, too, had slept from noon till daybreak the next morning with Hongjun clasped in his arms. When Hongjun at last rose and stretched his limbs, he realized Li Jinglong had been awake for some time, and was watching him with a grave expression.
“Are you okay?” Hongjun asked.
“Are you okay?” Li Jinglong returned. “Do you feel any pain?”
That third round, when Li Jinglong had pushed too deeply inside him, had brought some slight discomfort, but other than that, Hongjun felt wonderful. He had never imagined this could feel so euphoric. Now he knew why they said lust was dangerous—what he had done with Li Jinglong was simply irresistible.
The experience had affected him both body and soul, and he quite wanted to try it again—but he feared his body simply couldn’t take it right now. When the tides of passion had receded, he and Li Jinglong had embraced each other, spending slow moments kissing and caressing, and this, unexpectedly, had made him understand even more profoundly that emotion called love.
As he examined Li Jinglong’s face, Hongjun thought he looked a bit wan after going at it thrice the previous day. “What about you?” he asked. “Why do you look so pale?”
“You’re joking. Do I look like I’ve exhausted myself? Wanna go again?”
Hongjun hastily pleaded for mercy, suggesting they wait at least until the next day. He pushed Li Jinglong’s groping hands away, laughing. “I liked the last time the most, but it made me a bit sore. Where did you learn that stuff?”
Li Jinglong caught Hongjun’s hands and pressed them to his own chest, giving him free rein to wander over that warm expanse of skin. “From some erotic drawings.”
Hongjun pondered that for a moment. Li Jinglong kissed him again before getting up from the bed. “I’ll go fetch us some food.”
“I’m not hungry. Doze with me a while longer.”
“Be good now. I’ll let you cling to me as much as you want after you have some food in you. We have three more days until we arrive in Luoyang, after all.”
Despite Li Jinglong’s repeated attempts to coax him, Hongjun refused to let go. He flicked his tongue lightly over Li Jinglong’s lips, then one nipple. His teasing advances froze Li Jinglong in place.
“Look, you’re not even getting hard anymore.” Hongjun closed his fingers around Li Jinglong. “We shouldn’t go multiple rounds next time.”
“Actually, it’s because—” Hongjun watched in confusion as Li Jinglong’s expression turned queer. He resisted a moment longer before blurting, “I can’t—I have to get up.”
Pushing Hongjun away, he jumped out of bed, pulled on pants, and rushed out the door, sprinting barefoot up the staircase while Hongjun watched, perplexed, from the bed.
The sound of retching came from the deck above.
Hongjun was flabbergasted. No way—was doing that really so bad for the body?
On the deck, Li Jinglong was puking his guts into the sea, knuckles white on the railing. Hongjun, clad only in pants as well, ran over to him. “It’s my fault—are you okay?”
Li Jinglong fell into a sullen silence. Hongjun ran a soothing hand over his back, assuming he’d caught a cold. Li Jinglong said calmly, “Fetch me some water.”
“Next time, we really shouldn’t—”
“No, no, no, listen, it’s not because of that… Blerghhh—”
“You’re seasick, sir!” a sailor onboard shouted. “Go back in and lie down! Eat something bland—but take care not to overeat!”
Li Jinglong had gone deathly pale. He’d been so thorough in his calculations, yet failed to foresee that he’d be seasick. Unfortunately, Hongjun found this awfully funny. It was his first time aboard any kind of ship, and he’d never even considered such a possibility. Recalling what he’d read about seasickness in his medical texts, he ran up and down the ship for some plain congee for Li Jinglong.
In a complete departure from the confident, virile man he’d been in bed just yesterday, Li Jinglong had completely wilted. He could do nothing but sit and eat his congee.
Hongjun placed acupuncture needles along the acupoints behind Li Jinglong’s ears and boiled some medicinal herbs the boatmen had on hand into a decoction, which he instructed Li Jinglong to drink before tucking him into bed. Li Jinglong merely lay there, listless and fatally embarrassed.
“I wanted to be with you properly these few days…” Stomach half empty, Li Jinglong felt nauseous and feeble. “I can’t believe I got seasick.”
Hongjun laughed. “It’s okay. I like this too. I like everything, as long as I’m with you.”
Although it was already the fourth month of the year, the evening winds were still strong on the Yellow River. Li Jinglong pulled Hongjun into his arms, chest to back, and the two of them wrapped themselves in the blankets. When they looked up, they could see the stars shining down outside the windows.