He took a sip of black tea from the cup. It was a cup of Earl Grey, according to his order.
There was no aroma, and it was tasteless in his mouth. However, it was probably a problem with his tasting rather than the tea itself. It was almost as if his tongue had been anesthetized.
Kyouhei put the cup back on the table while frowning.
“I’ll be in the back if you need me,” said the Corvette’s owner, Kaoruko Houwa, nonchalantly. She then put her words into action and vanished inside. As she left, she gave a final cheery reminder that he could come get her if he needed anything.
A wise move on her part.
In a sense, the Corvette was a familiar sight to Kyouhei. It had various accouterments to make it look like a mountain hut and a total of about 20 seats. The entire café was filled with a sense of foreboding that seemed to turn others away.
“Right... just making sure I’ve got everything right here,” Kyouhei began, glancing at the girl next to him as he did.
She was a beautiful girl, the kind you would find your gaze trailing unconsciously after if you passed next to her in the street. Her features struck a balance between refinement and adorableness. Her hair was as straight as an arrow and like spun gold. Her eyes were a fathomless blue, shining like sapphires. Her skin was off-white, like smooth porcelain. No matter the angle you looked upon her from, there were no faults in her appearance. She was almost like a work of art, too perfect to be a creature of flesh and blood. Describing her as fairy-like would not be amiss.
Pamil Terrill Karl Bergmann—that was the girl’s name.
For a number of reasons—seriously, a lot—she had been living in the Nanbu household as Kyouhei’s younger sister. Her personality belied her looks, though... Once she opened her mouth, you would know her for the eccentric that she was. A lunat—a girl who liked to claim that she was the body double android of a ruined country’s princess.
But forget all that.
At the end of the day, her abnormality was nothing new.
Amongst other things, she’d fire beams from her eyes, emit fire as if she were a flamethrower, and was strong enough that she could probably tie a metal pipe into a bow. Regardless, whether he wanted to or not, Kyouhei was pretty used to all that by this point. Pamil seemed to have come to understand what he wanted and had stopped being quite so extreme, at least a little.
However...
“So you’re all Pamil’s...”
“Indeed.”
Now the problem was across from her.
Or should we say problems.
Several of them.
“We are the thirtieth king of the Bergmann Kingdom, King Dolph Terrill Balor Bergmann...’s body double android, Dolph X, the father of this Pamil there,” declared the man in front of him, in the opposite seat to be precise, with a bearing truly fit for the ruler of a country.
Nothing was missing.
Not his tone, not his aristocratic features, not even his solemn demeanor.
Still, everything clashed discordantly with his surroundings.
All would have been well if he’d been wearing silken clothes in an extravagant reception area. Instead, he was a middle-aged man claiming to be a king whilst wearing jeans and a T-shirt and sitting in a café that looked like a mountain hut, which completely ruined the impression. Whatever the actual situation was, all Kyouhei could see was a geezer caught up in delusions and claiming ownership of an non-existent throne.
Although he was serious.
“...So... I see,” was, therefore, all Kyouhei could let out in response.
If it were just Dolph, that would be one thing, but there also were his compatriots lurking behind him.
“I am his queen, Caleriette...’s body double android, Caleriette IV. I’m Pamil’s mother.”
“I’m Princess Pamil’s little sister, Princess Lorie...’s body double android, Lorie III.”
“I’m the Queen’s younger sister.”
“Her husband.”
“Their son.”
“His cousin.”
“Her little brother.”
“His big sister.”
“Her little sister.”
Even if it wasn’t the whole clan, there were way too many people to just sum them up under the title of “the royal family.”
They all had different heights, sexes, hairstyles, and ages, but their ethereality was much the same as Pamil’s. Each of them seemed to make the air itself sparkle from their mere presence. If it hadn’t been for the profusion of delusions, even Kyouhei would smile at the sight.
“Um, and the people behind you, are they possibly...”
“Honestly,” came an exasperated voice from behind Dolph as the latter sighed. The bob-cutted owner of the voice, beyond her hairstyle and some lingering youth in her features, was the spitting image of Pamil. This was Lorie. Well, actually, according to her... “we have said it repeatedly: each and every one of us is a body double android.”
...she wasn’t Lorie herself, but her body double android, Lorie III.
“Um...” Kyouhei managed, holding in his urge to rant as he thought.
Essentially, all of these people were tripping through the same kind of fantasy as Pamil.
All of them though...?
One or two people was one thing, but would it be realistic for all ten of them to be caught up in the same delusion?
Well, they do say madness is contagious...
Kyouhei had indeed felt his mind twisting around as he followed Pamil’s conversation in the beginning.
Actually, maybe she is a fantasist because she grew up with this lot?
Things had started with Lorie drifting ashore in a coffin that was identical to Pamil’s.
She was the spitting image of Pamil—loopiness, strength, and lack of common sense included. She had both Pamil’s good and bad points, and had claimed she was Pamil’s little sister’s body double android. He’d had many thoughts about it and gone to collect her coffin only to find ten of them.
And thus, his swelling unease was borne out in full when the Bergmann Kingdom Royal Family...’s body double androids (or so they claimed) appeared—a group of lunatics.
And, I know nobody asked, but they were all completely nude too.
Frankly speaking, he’d wanted to turn tail and leave, but he couldn’t do that, so he’d rushed to a nearby supermarket and bought some clothes, handed them over, and then brought them to the Corvette so they could talk without undue attention.
As ever, regardless of it being a holiday, the café was open, but with no customers. This fact often made Kyouhei worry about the café’s continued existence, but he was grateful for it today.
Anyway.
“Let’s get back on track,” said Pamil’s mother, Caleriette, with a calm voice.
She was a dainty woman, but she was a beauty. With certain features still visible through her clothes, she was very much a “grown-up Pamil.” She looked more like an actress or something, certainly not the mother of two children.
“I am unaware of exactly how we came to be separated...” she continued peacefully, her voice a refined version of Pamil’s, containing a mature charm that the latter lacked. The words spilling from her lips, however, were a whole heap of fantasy. “...but we are the royal family, and a family lives together. In fact, it would be unnatural if that were not the case. And as their body double androids, we do our utmost to avoid unnatural behavior.”