“Hey, if anyone has a hand free, come move these packages,” called a man.
“Okay!” a squire responded. “Come on, Queen, you can help too!”
“Okay,” said Queen.
After the circus performance was over, Queen and his friends went back to work, loading wagons bound for the battlefield with foodstuffs and other supplies. However, this task was soon to be complete, and it was only a few days before the wagons were scheduled to leave the capital. Queen and the other boys weren’t going to the front lines, but they would continue to help in the supply corps.
“At this rate, I’m better trained to be a porter than a knight,” one of the boys grumbled as he piled more luggage into the wagon.
“What can you expect?” his friend said. “We’re only squires.”
Even in a crisis like the duke’s insurrection, the squires were as laid-back as ever. Some figured that acting carefree now, while they were not actively facing war, made the whole thing less nerve-racking. Each squire had their own personal take on the situation, but the group as a whole was adapting to this new way of life without Fie. She had always been, in some sense, the center of attention, always causing some kind of trouble, which even Queen reluctantly had to admit. He had tried to track her down whenever he had the time, but before he knew it, he soon stopped looking altogether. At this rate, I’ll probably get used to her being gone, he thought. What a horrible idea.
“Looks like we’re done for the day!” a squire called.
“Man, I’m pooped! Thank goodness it’s time for dinner,” his friend said.
“I’m covered in sweat,” complained a third squire, “so I’m going to hit up the baths first.”
The other boys agreed with him, and the group all trooped off to the bathhouse, so blithely you would never know war was just over the horizon.
Queen likewise bathed, ate dinner, and returned to his room, taking the route he always used to walk with Fie. Today’s work was rather heavy labor, and the dorm was quiet. Everyone must have been asleep.
Naturally, Queen’s thoughts turned to Fie. They had spent so much time together in this room—playing cards, when his skill was no match for Fie’s; sitting on the bed reading books together, when Fie would fall asleep halfway through and set his heart pounding; attempting to do boyfriend and girlfriend things like k-kissing, when he tried his best even if Fie ended up taking the lead every time.
Everyone in the north dorm was kind and fun to be around, but he had only really gotten to know them because of Fie. Back in the east dorm, everyone kept their distance from him. It was only because Fie had drawn him in that he had made this group of friends, and it was being with Fie, more than anything else, which made him happy. She was so bright, so good-natured (even though her strange dark side shone through from time to time), and so fundamentally kind. Her adorable smile and impish expressions always made Queen’s heart skip a beat. She was, to Queen, the cutest girl in all the world.
I wonder if I could be happy just standing in the same room as her again. Maybe if he gave up this hope, if he even could give up this hope, he could stand a chance of being with her again—not as her boyfriend, but as her knight. In such a situation, she would become another man’s wife... Well, okay, she already had. Queen could still be the knight of King Roy’s wife though, and stay with her in that sense.
I bet I’ll be jealous, he thought. Horribly, horribly jealous. King Roy was respectable, attractive, and a great match for Fie, but Queen was certain he’d be consumed with jealousy if he saw the two of them acting as a married couple. Watching would be an envious agony, but he knew he would not be able to look away. Yet, compared with the other option of never seeing Fie again, that heartache might as well be sheer bliss.
Maybe Fie had known this would happen, and that was why she had turned him down the first time he had told her about his feelings. No, she had turned him down for his sake, out of kindness. She must have thought about it objectively and saw this as the inevitable outcome. A queen and a squire could never love one another and have their happily ever after; the potential dangers and number of obstacles were much too high. Yet after he continued to pursue her, she finally accepted him, probably out of compassion and pity more than anything. She had treated him like a child. Come to think of it, when they began dating, Fie’s smiles often suggested that something was preying on her mind. What a little boy Queen was—refusing to listen to reason and selfishly begging to be her boyfriend, even though her future held no room for him! And yet Fie gifted him this precious time of their relationship anyway. Fie was far more mature than he would ever be. He had sworn to protect her, but he was incapable of doing any such thing.
Queen had considered carrying her away and marrying her if push came to shove, but he had only thought of such a daring thing when none of these obstacles blocked his path. Now that he was back in reality and push had long since passed shove, he knew that the disappointed looks on the older knights’ faces would stop him before he could even reach Fie at the palace. It would also worry his friends to no end and cause a great deal of trouble for the kind man who had gone to the trouble of raising him after his parents passed away. It was over. Completely over. No matter how much he loved her, there were too many things that just couldn’t be done. Fie must have understood all of this as well, so he could not expect her to come to him either.
“I’m still just a kid...” He sighed. He wanted to become a brave knight to protect her, yet Fie was ultimately the one who protected Queen with her kindness. He couldn’t protect the girl he loved, nor take her by the hand and run away with her.
Maybe he didn’t deserve to see her any more. “Maybe my love was doomed from the start...” he said. Tears leaked from his eyes.
Just then, a light tapping rang out from Queen’s window pane. He wondered who in the world could be knocking at his window in the dead of night when a voice said, “Open up! Let me in.”
He jolted. That was Fie’s voice. This was the girl who had just been on his mind—no, more than that, the girl who occupied his thoughts endlessly.
For a moment, Queen was too stupefied to move. Then, with a gasp, he lurched for his window and frantically threw it open.
Fie did not come inside but instead looked up at Queen through the window. She broke out into a smile when she saw his face. “It’s been too long,” she said.
“Uh...uh-huh,” he stammered.
She noticed the area around his eyes and asked, “Were you crying?”
“Uh, no, I’m fine...” he bluffed, trying to act tough. He quickly rubbed his eyes.
“Really now?” she said. She reached out to stop him and used her handkerchief to gently dab away the rest of his tears.
Queen had a million questions to ask her. What had happened to her? What was going on with her and the king? How did she feel about Queen now? Yet none of the questions would come out. The sole thing monopolizing his thoughts right now was how beautiful Fie looked standing in that dress under the moonlight.
After studying Queen with a long look, Fie smiled. “Queen,” she said. “Will you marry me?”