I sat down at a riverbank not too far away from the fort and gazed at the river in a daze. I’d realized I had no words to try and convince Ana once she’d shown me those bright, sparkling eyes of hers. At this rate, I would give in and let Ana join the fight. I couldn’t do that. The battlefield was a place filled with death. Once I began seeing the possibility of death closing in around Ana, I lost my mind. This wasn’t a topic I could stay calm about, so I’d decided to hurry away and save the conversation for another time.
I couldn’t help but let out a deep sigh. How could I be so pathetic a guy that I ran away in tears? How could I have shown Ana such a pathetic side of me? I can only hope that doesn’t make her fall out of love with me... No, this isn’t the time to be down on myself! I need to figure out how to make Ana go home. I need to somehow find the words to convince her to get away from this place filled with death. I will find the words before I see her next!
“Oh, there you are.”
In the midst of my thoughts, I heard someone call out to me from behind. It was Anthony, and Justin was with him too. Perfect timing. Maybe they can help me. As they sat down next to me, I told them everything I was thinking. I couldn’t help but notice that despite the severity of this conversation, the two of them looked undeniably amused. I found myself stopping to ask what was so funny.
“Ah, sorry. It’s just that...I’m happy you’re actually coming to us for help.”
“Same here. You didn’t say a word to us before breaking off your engagement. We even told you to come to us if you had something weighing on your mind, but you never did.”
Oh, that’s true. Back then, I still didn’t trust anyone, and I never even realized it myself.
“It’s all thanks to Ana. Because I have her, I’ve come to be able to trust others.”
I’d told her everything about the difficulties of my past life, and as I listened to her kind words in response, my heart felt at ease. I knew the reason I was able to speak my mind so naturally to Anthony and Justin now was because of that.
“So what would you two do if you were in my position?”
“I’d respect her choice. It’s the same for anyone, even children, women, or commoners—if they have the determination to wield a blade, then they’re a warrior, and a warrior’s determination is not something to disparage.”
“Yeah, I’m pretty much in the same boat. In my opinion, the only time you can stop someone who’s determined to join the battlefield is when they’re a young kid, though my family and Anthony’s have different opinions on that. We’re of the same mind when it comes to most other things, though. Even if an untrained woman wants to fight, we respect her determination to risk her life. After all, she’s an adult.”
They both had opinions that were to be expected of military households. But then again, this way of thinking wasn’t limited to just military nobles. In this world, people fought not just each other but against monsters too, and the battle was never-ending. Fighting monsters was essentially a part of daily life here. They were fighting more for their lives than we ever had in my past life, and maybe even more than the people in eras older than mine. That was the kind of world we lived in. Both nobles and commoners most likely had a much more warrior mindset than the people of my past life. Their common sense was different from what we’d had in Japan.
Determination...huh? It’s true that I shouldn’t trample all over it. Nobles fought for the sake of their people. If a noble displayed the desire to fight, then it was proper etiquette to respect their decision. I’d done that for Justin and Anthony. I only placed them on the front lines because they themselves had requested it.
However, Ana was the only one whose determination I couldn’t respect in the same way. After all, if I did, it could lead to her death. That outcome was something I wanted to avoid at all costs. I can’t do it. I want to protect Ana! I’d sacrifice everything before I let her get hurt. She’s so important to me.
“Taking the organization of our armies into account, I think she’s invaluable here. You’re not going to be here with us because you’ll be carrying out a different strategy, right? With you gone, and the core of the defense here being those from House Sevensworth, it’d be good if we could have at least one leader of House Sevensworth here. It’ll help keep the people unified too.”
Anthony’s right. I’ll be going on a separate mission and won’t be here. That means I need someone else to lead our troops, and logically speaking, Ana fits the bill the best. But even so, I couldn’t let that happen. The best possible leader for an army was also the best possible target for the enemy. If I put her in charge, she’d be targeted first. I couldn’t do that. It was too dangerous.
“Good day, everyone. Here you all are. I’ve been looking.”
The three of us looked up and saw Lady Ekatarina in armor. I can’t believe it. If she’s here, then that means she was able to convince House Byron in this short period of time to mobilize for our side.
“I’ve heard the details of the situation from Lady Anastasia, and I’ve come to ask one thing of you. Sir Ginorious...please do not clip Lady Anastasia’s wings.”
“Wh-What? I don’t understand.”
“I mean that you seem intent on clipping her wings instead of allowing her to fly freely, high in the sky. I implore you to respect her wishes. She won’t be able to do anything if you continue to be overprotective and keep her in this cage you made for her.”
Her words felt like a punch in the gut. I’m...hindering Ana? I’m forcing her into a cage?!
“I don’t think there’s much for you to worry about either. At school, Lady Anastasia had extremely wonderful grades in military affairs, strategy, and all other military-related classes. She is extremely capable. I’d like to encourage you to trust in Lady Anastasia more.”
“Yeah, she’s right. You should try to trust her a little more. She had better grades than me by a lot. I bet she’ll be a much better commander than me at the very least.”
“Wh-What? I...I don’t trust Ana?”
I received another punch in the gut from Lady Ekatarina’s and Justin’s words. In my mind, I trusted Ana more than anyone in the world, and I didn’t doubt her abilities. Just as Justin and Lady Ekatarina had said, Ana always had stellar grades when it came to military classes at school. Even our military history professor was surprised by how much knowledge Ana could retain. I was sure that Ana could be a wonderful leader.
Even as a sorcerer, Ana was a lot better than others. Even if she could only use ember, it was many times stronger than what magic soldiers could produce. I truly understood how exceptional Ana was, but even with all of that, I couldn’t help but be worried about her on the battlefield. Was this really because, deep down, I didn’t have faith in her?
“Sir Ginorious, do you believe that Lady Anastasia will fail? If so, it means that you don’t trust in her. Being married means having each other’s backs. You should have more faith in her and allow her to defend you in return. Or perhaps you think that she doesn’t have enough skill to do that?”
“Of course I don’t think that!”
“Then why won’t you allow her to fight with you?”
“Well...”
“Ginorious has always been overprotective. He went above and beyond to do things for her that she was truthfully able to do herself. I think that’s what he’s doing now,” Anthony said. “Ginorious, if you didn’t always step in and instead stood back and let her figure things out for herself, I bet she would’ve done even more great things, don’t you think?”
His words felt like a blade in my heart. I was being overprotective? All this time, I’ve been stealing opportunities from her for things she could’ve done herself and have been trying to keep her in a cage? Thinking about it with a clear head, it might’ve been obvious that that was what I’d been doing. Ana was unbelievably excellent and was brimming with possibilities and talent. It must’ve been humiliating for a normal person like me to define her boundaries and keep her inside them. I was just selfishly trying to tie Ana down...
“You’re right...I should trust Ana...”
I had no choice but to accept the fact that I’d been wrong. I shouldn’t have been trying to hold Ana down. I should’ve been letting her fly as high as she could. I shouldn’t have been limiting her but cheering her on. After all, she could fly higher than anyone in this world. I’ll listen to what Ana wants. But it doesn’t change how painful this is. I was almost paralyzed with fear from the thought of anything happening to Ana. My body was trembling, and tears began to stream down my face. I could only imagine that this was how people during wartime felt when they received a draft order for their family member.