Chapter 28

Sometimes, it comes to me. A question I want to ask. To someone other than myself. I just want to know the answer, and it doesn’t matter who it comes from. It could be the dead-tired suit ahead of me, the security guard standing at attention by the roadside, or even the young lady doing her makeup as she walks. Anyone would do. Do you have a goal for ten years from now? Do you have a dream you would risk your life to achieve? When you were a kid, did you ever write an essay on what kind of adult you wanted to grow up to be? With an assortment of colored pencils that made up the rainbow, did your eyes sparkle as you drew yourself as an adult? When you talked about your dreams and future with your parents, were you excited? I did. I was. But I’ve forgotten it all since. The Sovereignty calls itself the witch’s paradise. That was what I was raised to believe, but an astral mage with no powers like me eventually has to realize that there’s no place in this country for someone who’s powerless. That was when all the childhood dreams I’d drawn of my future came crumbling down. All the dreams of what I would do once I was an adult… I lost them all. And that all happened in this lousy place that calls itself a “paradise.” I didn’t know… How was I supposed to live? How was I supposed to die? I had no idea what to do with my life. And then, I learned… …Elletear Lou Nebulis IX, the princess, was my exact opposite. She was everything I wasn’t. She knew how she would live and how she would die. She knew those things better than anyone. I was certain that I had no dreams I’d risk my life for. I’d lost all the things I’d imagined that I would become once I grew up, but she’d latched on to those things and never let go. However, she didn’t have the astral power to make those dreams a reality. She had no one to share her ideals with, either. She needed a knight who could support her. And I, Joheim Leo Armadel, wanted to live and die for her. 1 The Nebulis Sovereignty. In the place called a paradise for all witches, winter had fallen. The temperatures were cold enough to make the outside lights freeze over and settle deep into a poor guy’s teeth, even through the protection of a thick scarf. And yet this so-called paradise didn’t even give its people money to run their heaters. So what did the country suggest its civilians do? Work, that was what. Work the job we wouldn’t be guaranteed tomorrow to scrape enough together for today’s bread and heating. And if we were lucky enough to have an employer in a good mood, they might give us enough for soup. “How is this a paradise…?” I had four coppers. That was all I’d earned working in the cold wind that felt as though it’d tear my ears to shreds. And as it so happened, my employer wasn’t in a good mood. His precious cat had burned itself by getting too close to the hearth, so my soup money was eaten up by the vet bills. “So I’m worth less than a cat…” That was right. To the rich, the poor were worth less than animals. I knew that. Compared to a mean-looking lug, a pet that brings tranquility to their home is much more important. But… I’m still free to feel humiliated by it, aren’t I? I can’t accept my everyday life. The slight malaise I’ve felt this whole time has built up and burgeoned throughout the years. Why is it that the rich can spend all that money on their little darling pets while I struggle through each day just to survive? While I try to sate my hunger with free water from the park during the nights, they revel in drinking as much wine as they wish. What sets us apart? We’re both human and both astral mages. If the Nebulis Sovereignty is celebrated as a paradise for all witches, then how can it explain the difference between us? Yes, I know. These are just the gripes of a penniless loser. If I’m frustrated, then it’s time to work—until someone acknowledges me, and my work ethic brings me success. “I’m supposed to crawl my way to the top, aren’t I…?” That’s the color of the world. What color was the paper that I drew on with that rainbow of colored pencils as a child? Wasn’t the paper supposed to be pure white? Well, mine was black. No matter how bright my pencils were, I never could draw the rainbow of my dreams. And the world told me that if I didn’t like that, it was time to crawl my way up… “Yo, Joheim!” As someone called my name, I felt a hand clap onto my shoulder. “…” I didn’t want to turn around. I didn’t like smelling the stench of alcohol on his breath. And yet the offender still came around to face me, anyway. “Ha-ha-ha! Didja finally lose your touch? I know you didn’t notice me coming. This time, I’ll win the bet—” “You turned two corners with me and used a car’s left turn to hide it.” “Huh!” “Pay up, Lauzen.” I didn’t have to hold out my hand. The brown-haired man sucked his teeth and tossed a copper at me. Now I had my soup money for tonight. “You’re high-strung, you know that?!” “No, I’m sensitive.” Lauzen used to be a pickpocket and had since graduated to magician. Apparently, he’d done his damage in this part of town as a pickpocket, but even after washing his hands of his former occupation, he still performed vulgar tricks on the streets. The only difference was that now he’d return the wallets he stole as part of his tricks. “The issue’s the same as it’s always been. You just chose the wrong person to bet against.” Apparently, being aware of my surroundings was deeply ingrained. No matter how dead tired I was, I always seemed to be prepared for something. Maybe that was why I always had a mean look in my eyes, too. “Joheim, how about you use my copper to buy a round, eh?” “I’m using this to get myself some vegetable soup.” “Tsk… For how poor you are, you never seem to scrimp on yer meals.” “Better than booze. And keep your distance. You smell like a drunk.” He leaned against me as I walked down the streets. It was twilight, but the sky was an ashen gray, as though the heavens were about to unleash rain or sleet on us. I turned up the collar of my old coat and kept walking. I heard a song. It was a woman. It was so faint, that was all I could make out. “…?” When I realized that, I stopped in my tracks. It wasn’t because the song was beautiful. An uncultured man like me couldn’t tell the difference between good singing and bad. I stopped because it was unusual. I was on a major street. At first, I thought it’d come from one of the speakers on the roadway, but that didn’t seem to be the case. “…” “Hm? What’s wrong, Joheim?! Hm?!” Lauzen started hassling me from the side, but I had no obligation to answer him. I had no idea what to say, anyway. It’d just occurred to me that hearing a song on the street was strange. I followed the inconstant voice, turning corners. It led me to a plaza. There, I saw a crowd of several hundred people. “Is this…an outdoor charity concert?” A group had gathered around a water fountain. The singer seemed to be standing on its edge and performing. She must have been very softhearted—and pretty strange, too—to do this in the middle of winter. I just wanted to get a look at her face. Then I’d head out. I silently pushed my way through the packed crowd until I was right in front of the fountain. Then I looked up at the woman standing there, and all words escaped me. “…” She was the goddess of beauty in the flesh. Her fluttering hair was an incredibly beautiful emerald tinged with gold. Her features were perfectly sculpted, and her eyes were filled with love. She seemed to be the same age as me, just on the cusp of twenty. Her face had an adult look to it, and it was impossible to overlook her mature physique. Her ample bosom was constrained by a plain dress. She had the beautiful looks of a goddess but the seductive body of a devil. Who was she? Well, anyone in the Sovereignty could probably answer that question. The current Nebulis Queen had three daughters. This was one of the three Lou sisters—the oldest, Elletear Lou Nebulis IX. That was her name. “Why would someone so famous be in such a small plaza…?” No wonder there was a crowd. The rumors about her beauty were right. If anything, they didn’t do her justice. Seeing her in person, she was much more beautiful than on TV… But what did that matter? Among all the people who watched her in rapture, my cool gaze likely stood out. She was beautiful. But that only annoyed me. She had been born with a beauty that could capture men and women alike. ……She’s probably had an easy life. ……She has the beauty of a goddess, and she was born in a position of absolute authority as a princess. She’d won the lottery at birth. I wasn’t jealous of her but resentful of what she had. “…” It was time to head home. But as I turned around, a feeling like an electric shock ran up my spine. “Huh?” I spun back around. Why hadn’t I realized it before? “Why…?” The princess standing on the edge of the fountain, surrounded by a group of several hundred, being watched from every direction as she stood with the gray winter sky behind her, had a loving smile like a goddess’s on her face. “How is she smiling…?” She was acting so normally that it hadn’t even crossed my mind. It was cold out. So cold the freezing temperatures found a way to sink in and make my gritted teeth chatter. The entire crowd was clothed in winter coats, scarves, and mittens. That was natural. Without those, anyone would be shivering in the cold in an instant. But Princess Elletear wasn’t. She stood up there in only a dress. ……Is it because more layers would restrict her voice? ……But isn’t she cold? She had to be. Her lips had lost their color and were turning blue. “That must be torture…” She continued singing for the crowd in the freezing cold wearing only one layer. That was what had caught my eye. She was born with beauty, but she couldn’t have been born with that beautiful smile that refused to break even in the freezing cold. I couldn’t imagine what kind of willpower she had. She was anything but ordinary. ……If I’d been in her shoes… ……would I have been able to do it? I was probably the only one who had thought of things that way in the first place. But as I realized that… “Boooring. She’s just singing. How’s that supposed to keep us hooked?” …I heard someone mutter. My unwanted companion behind me had whispered those coarse words into my ear. “The little princess could try singing in a man’s voice for us or somethin’. That’d be a riot, at least.” “Hm?” “Ha! She’s gotta be using her astral powers right now.” “Oh, you mean that…” The first Lou princess’s astral power was Voice. It was common knowledge in the Sovereignty that she’d lost the lottery on her powers. She could reproduce any voice she’d heard in the past using her astral power. It was nothing more than a party trick. Lauzen was right. If a woman as beautiful as her suddenly started singing in a hoarse old man’s voice, it would give the crowd a shock. “She wouldn’t do that. It would just make her a laughingstock.” “Ha! What are you talking about, Joheim?” Lauzen sneered. “That’s what her role’s always been. She doesn’t belong in the palace. Just look! Which of the other princesses would show up here in the streets during the winter? They’re probably sippin’ on their milk tea in the warmth of their own rooms in the palace.” “I see…” I finally understood what he meant to say. Princess Elletear would never become queen. If she had to spend her life in obscurity in the palace, then she might as well become something to laugh at if she wanted the people’s attention. That was apparently his reasoning. But why could she never become queen? That was because the other princesses were absurdly powerful astral mages. And when it came to selecting the next queen, astral power was their top priority. As the symbol of the nation of astral mages, the queen had to have great powers herself. Even a child could understand that logic. ……The woman who wasn’t loved by astral power. ……Though she’s a princess, she’s like me in that way. Though she was technically a candidate to become the next queen, she must have felt inferior in the palace after being born with a disappointing astral power. I had to agree with Lauzen. “You seem to know a lot about her, Lauzen.” “All part of the job. I hear a lot about the royal family. Even knew about this outdoor concert.” He laughed. “Nobody’ll give Princess Elletear the time of day in the palace. Seems natural. No vassal is gonna back the princess who’s as good as lost her right to the throne. The Lous have got Aliceliese and the Hydra have Mizerhyby as their top contenders. No idea about the Zoa…but their vassals will choose a promising princess without a doubt.” “So she’s been ostracized?” “Yep. Look, when a pretty princess treats the people to a concert, they’re gonna fall for it and cheer for her… But that’s all just a joke to everybody in the palace. Because all she can do is charm the people.” In other words, though the other princesses rarely left the palace, Princess Elletear proactively came outside. And she was having a charity concert outdoors in the streets. She was also well-known for going on campaigning tours to various other countries. “So she’s not here in front of us for that, but because she can’t stand being by herself in the palace then…?” “That’s what the rumors say. Well, most of the people don’t have a clue what’s going on.” So they didn’t… Only the princess herself would know the truth, but it was an acceptable reason for me. To be frank, that must have been how much Princess Elletear hated the palace. ……She has two terrible choices. ……Braving the freezing cold must be better than staying cooped up in the palace. I had some opinions about astral power, but I wasn’t going to sympathize with her. Even if she hadn’t been “loved by astral power” either, in the end, I was still a pauper at the bottom of the social ladder. And it made no sense for a ruffian like me to sympathize with a princess in the first place. If anything, the first thing I thought of was whether I could use her. Treachery. “Lauzen, so she’s been abandoned by the vassals? You’re sure about that?” “Otherwise, she wouldn’t be out here.” “I see…” So the princess had no allies. In other words, she had a weak spot. But could a commoner rise to become a princess’s close associate? It wouldn’t be possible normally, of course. But when it came to just this princess, there was an opening for someone like me to get to her side. ……Guess it’s time to crawl up. ……If money and social status are the standards we’re judged by in this world, then so be it. I would lick her shoes to be by her side. I would gladly take the humiliation. “Lauzen, for argument’s sake, what would catch the princess’s attention?” “Huh?” Lauzen scratched his dull brown hair and turned. “What are you aiming at, Joheim? Did you fall in love with the princess at first sight?” “I’m just asking how.” “The astral corps.” “That was quick…” “Because that’s the only way I know. Anyone can try out. But that’s it—you can try.” The song had ended. As the crowd gave her a boisterous ovation, only Lauzen and I stared at the Imperial guards standing behind the princess. That’s right. I planned to crawl up to their level. “If you want success in this country, then joining the astral corps is the fastest way. They’re the heroes fighting the Imperial forces. And the more you distinguish yourself, the faster you’ll find yourself getting close to the royal family. And if they like you, then it might open doors to reaching a point like them.” “That seems a lot more achievable than I would have expected.” “Plenty of blokes dream about it. But, four days is enough to wake ’em up… That’s when the work begins.” Lauzen staggered as he turned away from me. He dragged one of his feet behind him as he parted the crowd. “See ya, Joheim. Hope to meet ya again, if you come back in one piece.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “Try not to let ’em break ya in four days like they did me.” A week passed. And I learned… …that was his way of warning me—but only after I felt the repercussions myself. 2 The taste of sand. Even the taste of iron. “You there… Number…” What was it? Were they talking to me? Damn it. My head felt like it was splitting open. No, wait. Maybe it really was splitting? That was how much it hurt, at least. “Stand up, volunteer number 0091!” “…Huh?!” Blood trickled down from the wound on my head. I realized it was running into my mouth and opened my eyes while I was still lying face down. That was right. I’d volunteered for astral corps training. “Failed. Pack your bags and go home.” What irony. Those words from the exam instructor made me recall everything. Right, I was going through the astral corps selection process. I’d always been confident about my physical abilities. I’d passed the fitness selection process without issue. But next came the combat selection. “I…” “Good thing this wasn’t a battlefield and that wasn’t an Imperial soldier. Hey, volunteer number 0084, you pass. Continue to the next part of the selection process.” The tip of my opponent’s shoe made contact with my skull—he’d kicked me. My vision was blurry as I watched the volunteer who had hit me over the head with an iron bar bow to the instructor and walk away. ……Was I eliminated after one blow? ……Lauzen must have been joking… How did he last four days here? It all sunk in. I realized exactly what I had gotten myself into. I’d been too prideful to think that I could figure this out without having anything to back up my abilities. And I also realized that the others with me were the cream of the crop. ……Damn it. This is no joke. ……So the guy who just beat me in one blow hasn’t even gone through training yet? He’s just an ordinary citizen? How could these people be so good? And what kind of monsters would they become once they officially joined the corps? “Tsk. You, bring a stretcher.” “…N…no…” The instructor sucking his teeth was like an alarm clock waking me up. I held my smarting forehead and clenched my jaw as I stood up. Hah! What a joke! And I thought I could find a place by the princess’s side. I thought I could find success by crawling my way to the top. Me…Joheim, a weak young boy with eyes apparently bigger than his stomach. The true jester wasn’t the princess but me. And that infuriated me. That was the moment I felt anger toward myself. ……There’s one more thing. ……Your eyes. Your cold eyes as you look down on me on the ground! They were disgusted by me. As though this was a place I didn’t belong, because I didn’t have the elite pedigree that all the others gathered here had. “Remember…my face…!” This wasn’t over. I took one step, then another. I struggled for breath, exhaled, and turned my back to the instructor who looked down on me. “Next time I face you…I’ll throw you down on the ground…” I felt the grit between my teeth as I went to the gate. That was how my ties with the astral corps began. “Hey, Joheim, came back alive? Ha-ha! If you made it out only with bandages, they must’ve let you off easy.” “…” Someone slapped my back. I knew that Lauzen had been secretly following me since three streets ago. I couldn’t call his face pretty, even as flattery. He hovered around me, inspecting the bandage wrapped around my forehead. Told you so. I could tell what he wanted to say. However… I didn’t care anymore. Before, I probably would have pushed him aside and told him to get his alcohol-tainted breath away from me. “Hm?” Just as I expected, he seemed to think it odd that I didn’t respond. Lauzen walked around me, feigning dramatics. “Ha-ha! Yer a funny one. Say, Joheim, didja end up getting yer ass handed to you? That why yer so down? Told ya, didn’t I? You’d get shaken out of yer dream before you knew it.” “………” “Seems like fate, doesn’t it? Little guys like us haven’t got anything going for them, so our best shot at making a name for ourselves is getting military achievements in the astral corps. But that place is full of monsters. They’re all super geniuses. They’re nothing like us.” “You’re right.” I didn’t look at him. I just went straight ahead, walking toward the outskirts of the Central State. “I was wrong. Of course the selection process for the astral corps wouldn’t be so easy.” “R-right… Of course. So—” “I moved out of the place I was renting.” “Hm?” “I’ve woken up from my dream.” The corner of my mouth lifted into a smirk. I’d meant to give him a relaxed smile, but it must have looked ghastlier than I thought based on his surprise. “You were right, Lauzen. They’re all geniuses in the astral corps. I went to the selection process without any idea, and they enjoyed walking all over me.” “S-sure…” “It’d probably feel great to beat those geniuses.” I realized something. I hated the upper classes that looked down on me. I couldn’t just crawl up. While clawing my way to the stop, I needed to beat the geniuses. I needed to show I was superior. “Fine then… I’ll train until my body breaks down.” “What?! W-wait, what are you saying?” “Wait and see.” I wasn’t even listening to him anymore. After that… I don’t remember much. I chose a training area at the edge of town. During the day, I worked myself to the bone training, and at night, I worked as a watchman in a place that was crawling with ferocious beasts. I built up my body and honed my five senses. I also went to the astral corps’ training grounds. I would cling to the chain-link fence and with bloodshot eyes, watch their training to learn. I needed to know what methods they used to train and become stronger. Yes. I would become strong. I would copy them. I planned to go one step beyond them and to train myself to the brink of death. I didn’t know how long I continued with that, but one day… When I felt that the training beyond the fence seemed slow, I trembled with joy. I could do it now. “Just wait…” I let go of the fence. I’d been clinging to it for so many hours each day that the chain link had warped into the shape of my hands. “I’ll beat you all.” It was time for the selection. The second one I would have. I was disqualified a second time. “…” A cloud of dust hovered in the air. I was in the maneuvering grounds after all the applicants for the corps and the instructor had all left. I was in a daze as I touched my forehead. I felt my burn—one from an astral attack. “I…lost…?” I had gotten a superior score in the fitness selection. Another superior score in the combat selection. But on the fourth day, in other words, the astral power selection, I had nothing. “Ha…ha-ha-ha…” Right, I had realized somewhere on the inside. I couldn’t use any astral power. I had astral power deficiency. I hadn’t been loved by astral power—I had astral power but not the energy to produce any attacks. That was why there wasn’t much difference between me and Princess Elletear. We were both persecuted within the Nebulis Sovereignty, where astral power was the be-all and end-all. She had an astral power that made her a laughingstock. Meanwhile, I was less than an astral mage for not being able to use my power. We were both considered comical. “I…” That was why I’d lost. I couldn’t compete against someone with astral powers. I’d been burned from a distance I could never reach with my fists. I’d nearly trained to death believing I didn’t have enough combat abilities, but it was as though that was useless once the difference in our abilities was shown. They had another talent: astral power. There was a difference between us I would never be able to make up through hard work. “So what?!” In the deserted space, I howled to the skies. “So…what?!” I couldn’t give up. Was I supposed to throw in the towel because they were born with talents that let them trample over me? Never. Thanks to the anger that motivated me, I finally realized what I truly wanted to achieve. Did I want to reach the top? Had I trained in order to reach the upper echelons? No. I didn’t care for those things. It had all started from my hate for this country and all the astral mages who looked down on me. To make them all acknowledge me, I wanted to become stronger. “What am I supposed to do?!” I got on my hands and knees and stared at the ground below my feet. I saw the vestiges the flames had left behind. Then I inspected the scorch marks with my eyes wide open. “The astral corps is a gathering of monsters. The only way to get them to acknowledge me is to defeat them with something other than astral power… That’s it, I need to become so powerful that they realize they can’t win against me!” The biggest obstacle was how I could win against genius astral mages when I had no powers of my own. ……I’m an idiot. ……All I have is tenacity. I couldn’t think of a strategy that could work. Only one possibility flashed within my mind that I liked for its simplicity and straightforwardness. That was to defeat them before they could use their astral power. From that time on, I changed the way I trained. I went from trying to surpass the astral corps’ training to pursuing a path in which I was trying to defeat the corps—in other words, I was on track toward developing a method to kill astral mages. “Right… I’m trying to develop the ultimate instant knockout…” There’s a momentary pause before an astral power can be invoked. If I could beat them before they activated their astral powers, then I wouldn’t fall behind in the selection process. What I needed was for it to happen in a flash. I needed a technique that would stop them in an instant, before they could use their astral powers. “This is the Sovereignty. I can get as much information as I want about astral power. I can study about all the kinds of astral attacks there are… Then it just depends on my training…the ultimate first strike…” Then… I began training like a devil. At some point, I’d even forgotten about being by Princess Elletear’s side.