Chapter 4:
Youth
I REMEMBER HEARING Lilia’s angry voice echo throughout the house that night. Maybe Dad and the others couldn’t hear her from the living room, but we could hear her just fine. Lilia was yelling at Aisha.
“Why did you do such a thing?! What would the deceased master think?! It is not our place to seduce Master Rudeus’s son!”
I could hear her despondent voice from a room a little ways away. It honestly hurt my heart. I should’ve been there getting chewed out with Aisha, but she’d told me, “I’ll be fine,” so I’d waited in the room. I hate to say it, but I was still acting passively, even after what Red Mama said to me.
No, it was less that I was passive and more that I believed in Aisha that much. At the time, she had the ability to solve problems left and right, more than I ever could. Even now, that’s true. Everything’s fine if I let her handle it. She wraps everything up perfectly. That’s the kind of woman Aisha is—really, really, incredible.
“Hey, Arus… Do you really think you’re a match for Aisha?”
When my big sister, Lara, asked me that, I agreed with her.
I wasn’t.
I really had left everything in her hands. Whenever I was in a pinch, I relied on her. And sure, Aisha could do anything, but that didn’t mean it was okay for me to push everything on her.
Red Mama had said I should be ashamed of myself, and I knew what she meant. At the time, I couldn’t properly articulate it, but I thought the same.
“I also think you’re being weird, Arus.”
“Sieg…”
“I don’t really get this stuff yet, but you love Aisha, right? You both did something bad, so why is Aisha the only one getting yelled at?”
When my little brother said that, I thought he was probably right. But I still thought to myself that Aisha said she’d be fine on her own.
“It’s a good thing Lucie isn’t here. She would’ve exploded. Probably beat you up.”
“Yeah,” I admitted.
I was still reluctant and didn’t know what to say to my big sister and little brother who were looking at me so coldly. I was aware that I was acting strangely. There was no way it was okay to make the girl I loved handle every problem by herself. I hadn’t learned everything from Aisha.
I knew that wasn’t the type of man I wanted to be.
“Arus, now’s the time to man up,” Lara said.
“Yeah, Arus. You can do it!” Sieg added.
“But how am I supposed to man up?” I asked.
Lara and Sieg, who were always close to one another, exchanged looks that said, Does he seriously not know?
But how could I? I was an idiot, and I didn’t know what I didn’t know.
Still, I knew I couldn’t just sit there regretting how I’d acted during the family meeting. I needed to reflect on my actions and move forward without being tied down by the past. That was my family’s philosophy.
“Maybe you should defeat Dad,” Lara said.
“What?” Sieg looked stunned by Lara’s suggestion.
“I was listening in on the meeting. As far as I can tell, the only ones who disagreed were Dad and Grandma. White Mama was mad that Aisha lied, and Red Mama was mad that you were being a chicken, but they didn’t actually seem against you two. I don’t think Grandma would’ve said no if Dad didn’t get angry. After all, she always seemed so happy that you two got along so well. In other words, everything’ll turn out fine if you beat Dad! I’m sure Red Mama would say the same.”
She used her typical monotone voice as she spoke, but she rarely said much because it was a pain to get involved, so I could tell she was really trying to help me—though her suggestion was anything but realistic.
“If I beat Dad? There’s no way I could win,” I said.
“You can do it if you attack him in his sleep,” Lara countered.
My dad was strong, but he was a magician and wasn’t on guard against us, so she was probably right. He’d be vulnerable while he slept. However, I had the feeling I shouldn’t try it anyway. It was hard to believe that Red Mama would accept those results.
“I-I think that’s a bad idea. Even if I beat him, our moms are still here.”
“Good point,” Lara said after a pause. That was enough to get her to back down. She must’ve realized it wasn’t exactly a genius plan.
“And what exactly would come after beating Dad?” I asked.
“If he dies, you’ll be able to say you’re the head of the family and let Aisha do whatever she wants,” Lara said.
“Dies? Um, isn’t that a little much?”
“Totally. Just a joke.”
Lara’s joke was hardly funny, but as far as Red Mama was concerned, I’d probably have to show I had the guts to go that far. Could I go up to my dad and request his little sister formally instead? That also didn’t feel quite right, though White Mama might have been okay with it if I talked to her.
Yeah, that was the right move. I needed to sit down with her and explain that I loved Aisha and wanted to marry her in the future. If I talked to Blue Mama as well, she would definitely tell me why Dad was so against it and how to solve this.
It felt like I had a plan for what to do next. I wasn’t great at conversation, but I felt like I’d be able to get through to them.
Lilia’s angry voice coming from outside the window faded, and I heard the sound of a door closing shut.
“Ah, she’s done yelling,” Lara said.
“I’m going,” I said decisively.
“Make sure not to get spotted.”
I nodded, then moved quietly to avoid being seen by my parents.
I grabbed Aisha’s hand while she was returning to her room.
“Aisha.”
“Ah, Arus!”
You shouldn’t be here. You just got yelled at, you know? If they see you here, you’re gonna get in trouble again, I imagined her saying. She would poke the tip of my nose with a smile on her face before telling me how we messed up and proposing what we could do going forward. For a brief moment, I was certain that was what she’d do.
But that wasn’t what happened.
“I’m sorry. I messed up,” she said.
“U-um,” I said uncertainly.
Aisha was worn out. Her expression was a mix of resignation, disappointment, and frustration. She tried to smile like usual but couldn’t manage it.
“We’re going to be separated,” I said.
I knew this day would come eventually, like how Lucie had left for the royal academy. Once I graduated from the Ranoa University of Magic, I was going to leave home. That had long since been set in stone.
Had Aisha been planning on coming along with me? I didn’t know what she wanted to do, but I wouldn’t have been surprised if she’d been making preparations toward that. I mean, Aisha was more than capable of it.
She stood there for a moment, silent.
“Arus,” she muttered. “Let’s run away together. Let’s leave here and go somewhere else.” I’d never seen her make an expression like that. She looked like she was about to cry. Like she knew we couldn’t do it, but she said it anyway.
“Hah, just kidd—”
“Let’s go.” I cut her off before she could finish saying this was all just some joke. It was reflexive on my part. Everything I’d imagined for us up to this moment was long gone.
“If you want to do this, I’ll come with you, Aisha,” I said. “I’ll do everything in my power to help you with whatever you want. Let’s stick together. I love you, so I don’t want to be apart from you.”
Aisha looked flabbergasted for a few seconds.
“Wow,” she eventually said in a flat voice.
“I’m nowhere near strong enough, and I might not be very useful, but I promise I’ll protect you,” I said, taking her hand in mine.
Aisha’s cheeks turned red, and she weakly gripped my hand back.
I have no clue what she was thinking in this moment. I wasn’t thinking much myself. But even someone as thickheaded as me could tell Aisha wanted to be with me. She was the type of person who normally ignored her own feelings and stuck to what was the most effective course of action. For the first time I could recall, she’d ignored that and spoken from her heart. I wanted to make her wish come true.
“Then, let’s go,” she agreed.
That was how we decided to leave home.