Claire’s POV
THE ONE STANDING in our way after we infiltrated the ghost ship was Louie, Rae’s childhood friend. It was likely the Empire that had instigated him. He had turned himself into an undead while still alive, then been pierced by numerous silver blades due to Rae’s quick thinking.
I didn’t know who might have tricked him, but I believed him to be a fool to betray the ones he held dear. At least, I had believed that.
“Thank you. Ah… I wonder if they’ll forgive me for not paying them back…”
His last words made my mind go terribly clear.
“Are we really doing this, Miss Claire?”
“Of course. If not us, then who?”
I dragged a reluctant Rae along with me to Louie’s home. His sickly mother—the reason he’d masterminded this whole ghost ship incident—should be there, bedridden. I believed it our duty to tell her of his last moments.
What Louie did was wrong. Even if he were only dancing in the palm of the Empire’s hand, his actions had caused many deaths. But given his circumstances, perhaps he had no other choice.
I understood the feeling of wanting one’s mother to live. Back when my mother died in an accident, I would have happily sold my soul to the Empire to bring her back, if such a choice had been available.
“Somebody else will tell her before long. I hear she still hasn’t fully recovered yet. Wouldn’t it be better to wait?” Rae said.
“If anyone is to tell her, it must be us. Only those who were actually there can tell her how he thought of his friends and his mother in his last moments.”
Rae had a pained look, for some reason. “…Miss Claire, you’re really a noble, aren’t you?”
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“No, never mind…”
It wouldn’t be until much later that I would understand what she meant to say.
Louie’s home was on the outskirts of Euclid. It was a small house, even by commoner standards, with wear and tear visible on the building. The garden was overrun as well, perhaps because there was no one to tend to it.
As I observed the state of the place, I knocked on the door. We were told to come on in, so Rae and I did just that.
“Why, Rae, it’s been a while.”
Louie’s mother, Ophelia, greeted us with a gentle smile. Like Rae had said, the woman hadn’t fully recovered yet. Her skin was pale, and her arms and legs were terribly thin.
Incidentally, we’d left Ralaire behind to avoid frightening Ophelia. We entrusted her to Mel, who had gone to the adventurers’ guild to help a friend with something. Ralaire was apparently quite popular among the adventurers after the defensive battle the other day, so she was taking part in their merrymaking.
“I apologize for not getting up,” Ophelia said. “I’m not feeling terribly well. It’s nothing serious, but…”
She broke into a coughing fit. I rushed over and rubbed her back, trying to ease her pain. “Please, don’t worry yourself. You should rest.”
“My, who is this young lady? Is she your friend, Rae?”
“Oh no, this is—”
“I am, ma’am. My name is Claire. I’m Louie’s friend too,” I lied. Revealing I was a noble here would put a wall between us, and I wanted her to be at ease. I tried to smile as gently as I could.
“Oh, Louie too?” Ophelia’s face lit up. “I haven’t seen him since the last time he brought me my medication. How is he doing?”
I froze for a moment. From those few words alone, I could tell just how much she loved her son. Even as she lay here sick in bed, she thought of him.
But I had to tell her. She needed to know how her strong, kind son died sticking to his convictions.
“Louie has…passed away,” I said, not mincing any words.
“What…? No… That can’t be true.” She seemed to think I was joking at first, smiling wryly and denying my words. But my expression told her I meant what I said.
A silence followed, one that seemed to last both an eternity and only a moment. Either way, it was too short a span of time for a mother to accept her son’s death.
“Why… How did he die?” Her voice was faint, barely audible.
“Louie…” I hesitated. I had thought I should at least tell her—his mother—the truth, but seeing her state made me think better of it. “Louie died trying to take down the ghost ship that was threatening the town. He died protecting his friends.”
That was the official version of events we were going with. Rae had been dead set against it, but I insisted we go with this. The only other person who knew what really happened was Misha. My father seemed to notice something was up when I gave him my report, but didn’t press for details.
“Louie was very brave. If it weren’t for him, this town would have suffered great loss,” I said, taking Ophelia’s hand. It was thin and weak, trembling slightly. I prayed she could take pride in the way her son had died. “Louie is this town’s hero.”
She was speechless for some time, lost in thought, expression unreadable. Eventually, she found her voice again. “I…see. Every little thing made him cry when he was little. I never thought he would grow up to be such a fine man…”
A smile crept onto her face. I thought, perhaps, she had found peace with Louie’s death. But I was mistaken.
“Still…I’d rather he’d have stayed a crybaby…if it meant he would come back to me.”
Stifling her cries, she wept.
“I had no idea death was such a different affair for commoners,” I murmured.
A few days had passed. We were on our way back from Louie’s funeral.
“What parts would you say are different?” Rae softly asked. She seemed to sense I was in low spirits.
“When a noble falls in battle, they are given a grand memorial service. But Louie was buried in the small garden of his home, and only given a crude grave marker and a small bouquet of flowers. It’s all so…meager.”
It was enough to make me wonder if death meant something completely different for commoners than it did for nobles.
“Louie is actually rather lucky. Most commoners don’t even get their own grave. Commoners who are worse off and those who die unknown on the streets are buried in shared graves.”
It was difficult for me to conceive of the reality Rae spoke of. Such a thing couldn’t be called a burial. It was more like disposal.
“I believe being able to honor someone’s death is a right only afforded to nobles. I won’t say there aren’t commoners who do the same, but for most, death can only be a sad, wretched thing.”
“…Rae?” I realized Rae wasn’t speaking to me, so much as she was speaking for herself to hear. “Rae, is something the matter?”
“…No. I was just fantasizing about all the ways I’ll toy with you once we—”
“Don’t lie to me. I’ve known you long enough to know when you’re serious and when you’re not.”
“…I’m sorry.” She took a deep breath and slowly said, “I never really paid Louie any mind. Not when he tried to make moves on me, not when he fought me, and not even when I killed him.”
“I see. What’s the problem, then?”
“…This was the first time I’ve ever killed anyone.”
“Oh, I see…”
“I don’t think Louie can be forgiven for what he’s done, but the one who ended his life and made Ophelia cry was undoubtedly me.”
This was the first time in a while I’d seen Rae look so fragile. The last time had been when she clashed heads with Manaria, I believe.
“Rae…”
“Louie smiled in his last moments, even though he was filled with regret. He had his mother, his friends, his future waiting for him, but I killed him!”
“Rae…” Unable to stand by any longer, I embraced her. I felt her tremble in my arms. “Rae, listen closely.”
“…Okay.”
“You are not solely responsible for Louie’s death. Misha and I also played a part. So quit trying to shoulder all the burden yourself.”
“But—”
“All we did was give him the stiletto.”
“The stiletto…?”
The stiletto, also known as the mercy strike (the coup de grâce), was a sword used to kill enemies near death to end their suffering.
“By taking cantarella, Louie was guaranteed to lose his humanity sooner or later. In his last moments, however, he was able to think of his mother and friends. That’s proof he was able to die while still human. What we did was an act of mercy.”
I didn’t wish to glorify killing, but I did not see our actions as senseless murder.
“…You really think so?”
“I do. But if you still can’t find it in you to forgive yourself, then remember him. Remember who he was, how he was fond of you, loved his mother, and cared for his friends. Remember him for the rest of your life.”
She looked at me, not saying a word.
I continued, “And remember the fact you took his life as well. If you can do that, then I’ll shoulder half that sin for you. We’ll atone together. Until the day we die.”
“Miss Claire…”
Rae didn’t cry. But even in the absence of tears, I could see she deeply lamented Louie’s death. I held her tight, realizing then that she had a vulnerable side too.
On this day, our one sin became shared between the two of us.