Just think of this as “tough love.” Pieces of shit like you like saying crap like that, don’t they?
“GAAAOOOO. GRAAARGH. GAAAWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
“Shh, shh. Don’t worry. We’re almost out of time. I’ll put an end to your suffering.”
I pointed my blade at the hole Jupiter had been pushed out of, a spot near its lower abdomen. My survey of this deadbeat’s body was about to reach its final stage.
With the fun almost over, I lifted Eckesachs and prepared to swing down. But just as I did…
“GRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”
…Keraunos suddenly began throwing a fit.
Its resistance was an exercise in futility, of course. Desmoterion still held the beast in place as it thrashed about. The spirit could growl and scream all it wanted, but it wasn’t going anywhere.
“What’s the matter? Don’t want me to cut you down there?”
The downtrodden dog let out a piercing howl in response.
It seemed I was right on the money.
Despite being hollow, and even after I’d ripped its upper body to shreds, the beast still seemed keen on resisting. But it finally seemed to lose its nerve when I pointed my weapon at a certain spot between its legs.
Huh, weird. I don’t remember there being anything about this in the official Dungeon Magia guide. Could it be Jupiter’s doing?
No way. C’mon, Kyouichirou, that can’t be it. Why would she make her trauma even more traumatic? Well, whatever.
I didn’t know why, but Keraunos was really protective of its nether regions. It seemed absolutely terrified.
“All right, all right, fine. Even I can show a bit of mercy on the battlefield. I’m done slicing you up,” I cooed at the beast as I adjusted the cylinder on Eckesachs.
The beast didn’t respond, but I felt it relax ever so slightly.
Lucky for you, Keraunos, I’m a nice guy who keeps his promises. I’d never go back on my word. I’m done. Done cutting you up, that is.
I set a combat cartridge that read PIERCE into Eckesachs’s chamber and pulled the trigger.
“This nasty hole of yours…”
Eckesachs’s shape changed. It was no longer a sword—its shape was pointed at the end.
“It calls for something thick and sharp!”
Eckesachs had transformed into its spiral-lance form.
It was thick and long, and it had a twisted body.
But this was no mere lance. The head of the weapon had a special design with twisting gutters running along the sharp, cylindrical cutting edges of the slime steel.
And unlike the rest of Eckesachs’s forms, I could make this one spin by channeling spiritual power into the tip.
In a word, it was a drill!
Eckesachs made a satisfying vrrrrrrrr sound as it began to spin.
As soon as it heard the sound and sensed the spiritual power of my weapon, Keraunos let out a terrible screech and started flailing its limbs.
“Whoa, whoa. Don’t get so excited that you piss yourself, bud. At least not yet. I’m about to make that hole between your legs a hell of a lot bigger with this long black drill of mine. I hope you’re ready for this.”
I steadied my aim and brought the spinning drill-lance closer to the hole Jupiter had emerged from.
“GRRRAAAOOOO!”
“I’m not waiting.”
“GRRAAA!”
“There’s nothing more to talk about.”
“GRAWR! RRRAAWOOOO!”
“Not a chance… Wait. Why am I even talking to you?”
You’ve been awoooing and grawring for a while now, but…
“I’ve got no freaking clue what the hell you’re saying, asshole.”
“GGGGGRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”
The spinning lance drilled into its crotch. Then for good measure, I sliced the bastard up with Laevateinn.
It let loose an anguished death wail.
My heart was full of hatred and rage as I sped through my little construction project on Keraunos’s junk. When I was done, there was nothing left of the beast to be found.
The proud do not endure.
Even the fiercest of beasts must one day get plowed into oblivion.
After all, everything in this world is impermanent.
Even the abusive reign of a toxic parent will one day come to an end.
“Listen up, you worthless asshole. You’d better etch this into your soul. Hell, etch it between your legs.”
I thrust my drill-lance into the sky as I made my proclamation.
“Jupiter is not your toy. She’s a person with her own heart, her own dreams. If you’re too stupid to understand something so basic, then quit pretending you’re anything even resembling a father to her, shitbag.”
You did whatever the hell you wanted, then acted all high and mighty like some knight in shining armor when no one asked for your help. If you ever try to pull that crap in front of Jupiter again, I’ll dig you up and treat you to something so heinous, it’ll make what I just did look like a tickle fight.