Aira nodded in agreement! “That’s right! After all, isn’t murder an expression of love?”
“That’s the scariest interpretation of all.”
Good ol’ psychopathic Aria! It was doubtful that her extremely eccentric tastes could tug Jacob Yamada’s heartstrings!
Wataru raised his hand! “All right, it’s my turn! I’ve never written a novel before, but I gave it my best! Take a listen!!”
“You seem proud of it, Wataru. What’s the title?” Résistance asked!
“Super-Explosive Adventure Boy, KAKERU!!”
“I didn’t expect any less from you, Wataru. The title alone makes me never want to read it.”
Ignoring Résistance’s comment, Wataru stood tall, parchment in hand! “Get ready for this summary: my heart and soul!!!” Wataru began reading the summary out loud, his face set in the boldly defiant expression of a Nio! Read on to see how epic of a writer our protagonist is!! “’Sup? Name’s Kakeru! (Hot-blooded!) I’m traveling the world, following a treasure map Pops left me! (Hot-blooded!) Day after day of hard-core adventure for the hidden treasure! (Hot-blooded!) New episodes every Sunday morning at 6! (Hot-blooded!) Make sure to tune in! (Hot-blooded!)”
“That’s... a commercial for an anime show,” Résistance pointed out in confusion. It’s getting very tiring to have to repeat myself over this, but fantasy worlds, of course, can have anime and commercials! “It’s not even a summary... And is it some sort of trend to put a phrase in brackets after every sentence?”
“It conveys how hot-blooded the protagonist is!” Wataru explained!
“When your summary isn’t a summary at all, how is it supposed to convey any sort of appeal?”
“I-I see...!” Wataru quietly sulked at Résistance’s point!
“It’s okay, Wataru!” Aria jumped in to assuage his hurt feelings! “I thought it was good! I see a bold statement in airing that show at 6 on Sunday mornings when the only people awake are geezers!” But alas, she only rubbed salt in his wounds!
“The time has come... It’s my turn...” Résistance declared, and stood with a confident smile! “Listen to my brilliant summary and learn the true meaning of a novel!” Résistance was the only one of them who had experience in writing, after all! It seems like her plot would prove to be their only hope!!
“I’m counting on you, Résistance!!”
“Oh, this sounds good!” Aria chimed in! “So, what’s it called?”
“Dark Taboo ~The Forbidden Abyss~”
“Huh?”
Leaving Aria dumbfounded, Résistance began proudly narrating her summary like it was the best thing since sliced bread! “In a sorrowful world of woe, covered in pitch-black darkness, the Infinite Hell ~Infinitus Infernum~, Lucifer solitarily walks alone in this desolate world; it is his destiny of solitude, the ~Fatum Solus~, as the reincarnated avatar of darkness. One day, his beloved lover Tiara is murdered by a human assassin. Overcome by vengeful vengeance, Lucifer succumbs to the dark power of ~Obscura Virtute~ and solitarily invades the human world, alone with his lonesome. A mysterious organization by the name of Right Arm of Divinity ~Dextrum Brachium Sanctum~ awaits him. Will Lucifer defeat them in the Holy War ~Sanctus Bellum~ and avenge his vengeance for Tiara in revenge? Behold, thou who hast beenth entrancedeth by darkness. This is but a fragment ~Fragmentum~ of the sorrowful yet beautiful chronicle of a young man whose soul was darkly chained by the chain of darkness ~Vincula Tenebris~!”
“That was the worst thing I’ve ever heard.”
“Résistance! And you had the gall to talk crap about our stories!?!?”
Aria and Wataru snapped at her at the same time!
“Why would you say that? That was a wonderful summary.”
“It doesn’t make any sense!” Aria shouted, her face beet-red!
“Hm.” Résistance held her chin for a moment. “I see. Then I’ll add (Dark Smile ~Ridere de Abruptum~) at the end of each sentence, to make it more like yours.”
“That’s not the problem!!” Aria raged!
“What the hell is the Right Arm of Divinity ~Dextrum Brachium Sanctum~!?!?”
Résistance met Wataru’s wrath with a smile, as if she was begging to be asked that very question! “Great question. The ‘Right Arm of Divinity ~Dextrum Brachium Sanctum~’ is the mysterious organization that serves as the nemesis of Lucifer, the protagonist. It’s composed entirely of humans, but they have all had holy powers bestowed upon them by angels. So, to Lucifer, who has devil blood in him, they are natural enemies. And this is a spoiler, but we discover towards the climax that Lucifer is actually a half-blood himself, the product of an unholy forbidden coupling of an angel and a devil—”
“Not another word!!” Wataru interrupted Résistance’s goth-fic with the expression of a Nio!
Résistance frowned, completely dejected! “I’m just getting into the very core of Infinite Hell ~Infinitus Infernum~, which is the True Taboo ~Uiolare et Frangere Morsu~—”
“Taboo this, Taboo that. Give me a break, Résistance. The orb is on the line, not to mention the rest of my life!” Aria declared, her eyes bloodshot! The way things were going, not only would they miss out on the orb, but we would lose our dear heroine. Without our heroine, I see no way that I could continue writing this novel! If such a thing were to happen, the remainder of the book will be dedicated, in its entirety, to a glorious postscript! Fear not, Dear Readers!!
“Wh-What do we do!? Our hour’s almost up!!!” Wataru began to panic, a cold sweat pouring down his face! “He said he wanted something unique and exciting that will shake his mind...!”
Aria completely lost her composure, along with whatever small semblance of sanity she ever had! Her eyes rolled back into her head, and she said with a crazed smile, “Greh heh heh heh! Our journey ends here! What do I care now!? Just mix them all together!!”