It wasn’t until more than a year later that the mystery of where I’d first seen Takigawa-san was finally cleared up.
Just as everyone had hoped, she proved to be a truly talented researcher. During her initial trial period, she shadowed many different people for training purposes, but she absorbed it all quickly and sometimes even put forth suggestions for more efficient processes. Apparently, the director wanted to formally hire her right away, and after the higher-ups talked it out, sure enough, she was assigned to my research room. For the first time in my career, I was going to have a coworker.
Then, at the end of the workday…
“Koyomi, come here a second,” my dad called as I was walking past the break room.
“What is it?”
When I approached, he held out a single envelope. I took it and opened it to find two 10,000-yen bills inside.
“Need me to buy supplies or something?” I asked.
“No, I want you to use that money to take Takigawa-kun out to dinner tonight.”
“Excuse me?” I scowled.
“Starting today, you two are a team. You need to establish rapport with her.”
“Pass. Not necessary. I’m going home.”
“Now, now, hold on a minute. I’ve already put in a reservation at a restaurant your mother suggested,” he said.
“What the hell would you do that for? Just take Mom then!”
In this instance, “Mom” referred to the director. After the two of them got married, I made an effort to call her that in private…to stave off the guilt.
“Sorry, but she and I are going to a different restaurant tonight, so the reservation will go entirely to waste if you don’t make use of it.”
“Who are you and what have you done with my dad…?”
It felt like he was trying to play Cupid for his perpetually single son. At first I thought maybe he was worried about me now that he was getting on in years, but this quickly proved not to be the case.
“Look, I know you haven’t moved on from Shiori-chan,” he said suddenly, and my breath caught in my throat. “It’s your life, and I won’t criticize your choices. But at the very least, you should try to expand your possibilities. Takigawa-kun is a truly brilliant researcher, and I’m confident she can help you. It won’t hurt to establish an amicable relationship with her.”
“Are you seriously playing the Shiori card right now?”
“You were already thinking of Takigawa-kun as a potentially useful pawn, were you not? Well, she will be useful, make no mistake.”
Evidently, my father was still the same man he always was. Like me, he was missing some element of humanity deep down.
I paused before answering him. “Fine. I accept.”
I put the 20,000 yen in my wallet and saved the restaurant’s contact info in my phone. If the director picked the restaurant, then it’d hardly be any different from a work meeting. I sat there in the break room and waited for Takigawa-san to arrive.
As the reality set in, however, I started to get nervous. It had been more than a decade since my last social interaction, and other than Shiori, I didn’t have any experience inviting a woman somewhere. What was I supposed to say?
If I start with, “Great work today,” she’ll say, “Thanks, I’ll see you tomorrow,” and I’ll say, “Take care”… Gah, no! I can’t let her walk out! How about, “Great work today! Want to have dinner?” Ugh, too sudden. How the hell did I invite Shiori anywhere? “Let’s grab some grub”? Not happening…
The more I tried to think about it, the harder my heart throbbed. It had been so long since I last felt this tightness in my chest… It was kind of nice, but at the same time, I felt guilty. After all, Shiori would never get to feel her own heartbeat ever again… And it was all because I…
“Hidaka-san?”
My heart nearly stopped. “Oh, uh…hi, Takigawa-san.”
The next thing I knew, Takigawa-san was standing right in front of me. She must have finished her work. This was my chance to ask her to dinner. I just needed to follow the script I—wait, why was my mind blank all of a sudden? Wasn’t I just planning what to say?
“Great, uh…great work today…”
“Thanks. You too, Hidaka-san.”
I couldn’t think of what to say next. What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I just talk to her like I could with Dad and Shiori? Had the past ten years of relative isolation completely robbed me of all communication skills? My heart pounded out of control, and I began to sweat. I wanted to say, “Let’s get dinner,” but my mouth suddenly couldn’t remember how to make L sounds.
Takigawa-san noticed my silence and frowned. “Erm, the vice-director told me you’d be taking me to dinner tonight…”
For the first time in ages, I felt sincerely grateful toward my father.