YUKI heard the crackle of something burning and searing away. She heard the rumbling roar of something washing away. Unsettling, throbbing screams came from her heart. Indescribable anxiety coiled around the pit of her stomach. Covering her ears to the raucous noises drowning out her thoughts didn’t mute them as they echoed directly inside her head. She cowered from the quickly approaching sounds.
“…!”
A thundering roar like the sound of blood spurting from a stabbed body, like thunder, like an earthquake assaulted her five senses. Her throat contracted. She couldn’t breathe. Somewhere in the recesses of her mind she calmly assessed she was screaming at the top of her lungs but her own voice no longer reached her ears.
“Yuki!”
Rough smacks to her cheeks slowly summoned back her senses. The stinging ache in her cheek, the ragged breaths ripping through her lungs, and the sweat soaking her heavy body.
“…Selena?” she croaked. Selena peered down at her on the verge of tears.
“Are you okay? You were badly moaning,” Selena said with a kind smile and ran her thumb under Yuki’s eye. Her thumb pulled away with tears on it.
They had to be in the room prepared for her in the castle. Yuki laid on the most comfortable bed she had ever felt and Selena sat beside her. Vigo stood on the other side of the bed.
“Ah…”
Vigo wordlessly put his hand on her forehead. “Do you have a headache or the urge to throw up?”
“No.” A sharp pain stabbed at her chest, but the source of it wasn’t visible anymore.
“This is a case of overexertion and mental exhaustion,” Vigo diagnosed.
Mental exhaustion—those two words twisted her gut.
“Anxiety, rushing, worry, and other such emotions are likely causing an imbalance in you. Did all your worries and fears hit you at once?” he asked, pushing back her hair.
“…!”
Neither of them knew. They didn’t know what happened between Yuki and Orga. If she were to tell them, where should she start? Stab. Stab. Daggers seemed to stab her chest from all directions.
The incident had taken place months ago, but the events clung to her memories like mold and wouldn’t go away. The cruel curl of his lips as he pressed the burning hot iron rod to her chest over and over again. The smell of flesh burning away, layer by layer. Hearing her own screams come out sounding like the death screech of a banshee.
The discomfort of intense pressure being placed on her stomach had her wriggling in bed. Gradually rising bile brought a grimace to her.
“…They have finished inspecting the medicine. Can you do this, Lady Yuki?” Rhad asked from where he leaned against the wall with his arms folded.
“You want to bring Yuki to the queen in this awful state?!” Selena pulled Yuki into her arms and hugged her protectively. Without her armor on, she smelled like flowers and honey.
“We are out of time. The queen’s condition is worsening by the minute.”
“I don’t care! If we have her do it now, she’ll—”
“I’m…okay,” Yuki said over Selena.
“Yuki!”
“I’m fine, Selena. I’m fine.” She clenched Selena’s shirt and smiled up at her. She didn’t let Selena’s hurt look affect her as she turned to address Rhad, “Do we go now?”
“No. It seems the queen has a guest in her quarters. You have a little time. Would you like to rest?”
“No. If I still have time, I want to use it to take a bath. I reek of sweat,” she joked, putting up her best smile.
“As you wish, m’lady,” Rhad said and gave orders to a servant waiting in the back of the room. The servant bowed and left.
“Yuki…” Selena intoned sadly.
“Thank you for worrying about me, both of you. But I really am okay,” Yuki affirmed and swung her feet over the side of the bed. Slowly, she lowered them to the floor to fight off another wave of dizziness.
Despite what she said, her hips mocked her. If she didn’t concentrate, her legs would give out and she would crumble to the ground.
I wonder if I really am going to die.
Yuki felt as if her limbs were made of sandbags. The dryness in her throat was tormenting, but her stomach refused to accept anything. The tip of her nose, her temples, and the back of her neck dripped with sweat. Inside and out, she was freezing and shivered like her life depended on it to keep from contracting hypothermia. If her body had a limit, the needle on the gauge had already passed red and broken off completely.
“If using this power brings happiness to the people of this world, I’ll happily make use of it. I’d be satisfied even if it results in my death.”
The statement she made to Rhad mockingly rung through her. Even on the precipice of it becoming a reality, calmness settled over her.
Blurriness filled her vision. She blinked several times. The servant returned with something in their hand. Rhad exchanged a few words with them and looked at Yuki. A door to an adjoining room was opened and the servant slipped inside. Rhad gestured for Yuki to follow. Encouraging her shaky feet to walk in a straight line, she went inside the newly opened room.
Something in the dark recesses of her mind cackled.