Reynaldo looked different than usual. His bangs hung over his forehead, and he wore a robe similar to pajamas. When he’d first been admitted to the hospital, bandages covered nearly every inch of him. Only his back was bandaged now.
“Did you hear?” Reynaldo asked. “Queen Tia will receive her verdict tomorrow. With all her crimes combined, she’ll likely be hanged.”
“Truly?”
Then she’ll receive the same sentence as Rosemary?
“It’s just as you proclaimed.” Reynaldo guessed what I was thinking. “What she did to others has befallen her as well.”
He remembers what I said to her. Although Rosemary was the first one to speak those words.
“I suppose so,” I agreed.
This time, Tia would be the one standing on the gallows. Honestly, some people might refer to this as exacting vengeance. Regardless of my own desires, the world would interpret it as such. Personally, I felt sorry for Tia, as she would soon know the fear of stumbling towards her own execution. Even after death, I’d never forgotten the feeling of the rope that had killed me. I wouldn’t wish that terror on anyone.
“Will you attend the execution?” Reynaldo asked, concerned about me.
After thinking it over, I nodded. I had a duty to see everything through until its conclusion.
“And what will you do after Tia has been taken care of?” Reynaldo inquired.
“Honestly, that’s been on my mind a lot lately,” I replied. “I wanted to ask for your advice.”
“Did you now?”
Though surprised, Reynaldo seemed like the best person to ask advice from.
“That’s right,” I answered. “You’re probably the one who knows me and Rosemary the best.”
When I clarified that, Reynaldo looked even more surprised. To the best of my knowledge, he knew me better than anyone, excluding Albert or a member of my current family. Also, I believed that he would give me his honest opinion.
After considering something, Reynaldo donned a mischievous smile. “Do you need my advice on matters of romance?”
His directness caused me to squirm in embarrassment. “I-I might…”
“Aren’t you an honest one?”
Reynaldo smiled more frequently lately, and his expression was dazzling. Unfortunately, I couldn’t look at him directly due to embarrassment.
“Hmm…” he mused. “First, allow me to guess what you need advice on. You’re wondering how to respond to Albert’s proposal. Though you haven’t rejected him, you haven’t agreed either. Right now, you’re agonizing over what to tell him.”
“Yes, that’s right.”
Was he some kind of fortune-teller?
“Furthermore, working for the chivalric order has its appeal, but you also want to go home,” Reynaldo continued. “And if you had to choose one, you would choose the latter.”
I couldn’t think of a response.
“Am I right?” Reynaldo pressed.
I nodded. “Yes, you are.”
I’d chosen to come to Reynaldo for advice, but I couldn’t believe how accurately he’d guessed my worries. Even fortune-tellers would kneel before him.
“You have feelings for Albert,” Reynaldo barreled onward, “but there’s a reason why you’re hesitant to accept his proposal.”
“Correct.”
Right on the mark again. Perhaps he’s a mind reader, not a fortune-teller.
“However, Albert—dunce that he is—doesn’t have a clue about your worries,” Reynaldo said. “Hmm… Personally, I’d advise you to find a much better man, but since I know Albert’s good qualities, I’ll keep my mouth shut.”
You call that keeping your mouth shut?
“If you’ve guessed that much, you probably know the source of my worries, don’t you?” I asked. “I fear Albert is expressing his love for Rosemary through me.”
Ever since his proposal and declaration of love, I didn’t know whether to deny or accept it. When his dark brown eyes gaze at me with such passion, is he seeing me or Rosemary? I often wondered.
“If I were beautiful and we were close in age, as in my past life, then I would gladly accept his proposal,” I said. “But—”
“Stop right there,” Reynaldo cut me off. “You’re a wonderful woman, Mary, and very beautiful at that. Please don’t demean yourself so.” He spoke firmly, his kindness filling me with joy.
“Thank you very much,” I said. “Still, I’m not Rosemary. Even if I inherited her memories. Even if I am her reincarnation.”
That’s right—I wasn’t Rosemary. This worry had coiled around my gut for so long. So when Albert looked me in the eye and expressed his love for me, I wasn’t able to reciprocate.
Even if he sees me as Rosemary, part of me doesn’t mind. I simply want Albert to love me.
Coming to terms with these shallow feelings had been incredibly painful. If I accepted Albert’s proposal, I would be deceiving him, regardless of whether we had a happy relationship. Oh, you’re not actually Rosemary, he might realize one day and reject me. I’d been torturously dragging out my answer due to this internal conflict.
“May I say something?” Reynaldo asked after a pause. “Unfortunately, you might find it unpleasant.” Reynaldo asking for permission to speak was unusual. Nevertheless, I nodded without hesitation. “It’s just as you say,” he continued. “Even if you inherited Rosemary’s soul, you aren’t my sister, regardless of whether you possess her memories or feelings only known to her. In the end, you are a different person.”
Despite being the one to state this truth, Reynaldo wore a pained expression.
“I must admit something to you,” he said. “Back when I sought vengeance, I also thought of making you my wife.”
His wife?
“What?” I asked stupidly. The revelation stunned me.
“That’s right,” Reynaldo said. “I thought of marrying you regardless of what you wanted. Back then, I thought that was the only way to ease your worries concerning your connection to Rosemary. This manner of thinking might resemble Tia, only seeing people as game pieces. Similarly, I merely viewed you as Rosemary, not as your own person.”
Reynaldo’s confession shocked me, but part of me had an inkling of this all along.
“If I’d professed my feelings for you back then, a clever woman like yourself would have brushed me off,” Reynaldo continued. “But Albert is different—he sees you as Mary, which includes your past as Rosemary. He’s a bumbling man who doesn’t concern himself with complex thoughts. By the same token, he loves what he loves, and is pulled towards what attracts him. Still, his inability to ease your worries does warrant criticism.”
I found myself wanting to agree with this brutally honest description of Albert, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to criticize him.
Once again, Reynaldo donned a mischievous smile as he observed me. “Well then, why don’t we put Albert to the test?”
“Put him to the test?” I repeated.
Reynaldo’s expression changed from mischievous to malicious. “Indeed. We’ll see how he truly feels.”
What on earth does he plan on doing? I wondered. After I heard his explanation, it didn’t sound too crazy.
That was my naiveté speaking.