“I had a dream like that, anyway,” Elysia reported dejectedly. Her ponytail also seemed somewhat unenergetic, hanging down limply. Zen’s shirt was in this fourteen-year-old girl’s hands.
She’d failed at using needle and thread to patch up the hems that had been coming undone, instead tragically worsening the damage.
“As I always say, you don’t have to push yourself, Elysia.” Zen comforted his pretend daughter.
Indeed, Elysia wasn’t related to him by blood. She was actually the imperial princess of the Catalan Empire—and first in line to the throne, no less. Although, here in Nazalf Prefecture in the state of Cylin, way out in the sticks of the empire’s southernmost region, she had to stay disguised as a mere village girl, the poor thing.
Zen couldn’t bear to see how disheartened and remorseful she looked just because she’d ruined one shirt. Beyond anything else, the sight of her reddened fingers that she’d accidentally pricked was just so sad.
“I know we can’t really live a rich life since we don’t want people to find out our true identities, but we have plenty of money from Sharla’s farewell gift. I can buy a replacement shirt no problem,” he said, reasoning with Elysia gently to make sure she didn’t hurt herself further.
But while Elysia remained dejected, she said, “But isn’t it better if I can sew? The money Sharla gave us won’t last forever, and we don’t know how long it’ll be before we can return to the imperial capital. We should generally try to live a lifestyle that’s in proportion to your small salary.”
“Ack...” Zen immediately hacked like he was spitting up blood, unable to object. His salary back when he was working at the central government agencies hadn’t been too bad, but because he’d been demoted to an ordinary government official at a tiny village town hall, it had been slashed to a really pitiful amount.
“What if I just wear my town hall uniform at home too?” he suggested. “They’re provided to me, and I can have them immediately replaced if they get all frayed, and it won’t hurt our finances.”
“I don’t really want to live with someone who wears a uniform around the clock...”
“Yeah, I figured.”
Even this imperial princess, a girl that was beyond sheltered, doubted his common sense, as if asking, There are limits to how much of a workaholic you can be, right? Zen’s face stiffened.
Besides, what was really important here wasn’t the household finances but his worry for Elysia.
“A-Anyway, you’re working hard enough, Elysia. I don’t want you to push yourself any more than this!” Zen argued vehemently with her.
“You keep saying ‘push yourself,’ but I’m actually pretty capable, you know?” Elysia said huffily, a complete reversal from her previous depression. “I can cook now, right? And you eat what I make every day, saying how tasty it is and asking for more helpings, right? It’s only a matter of time until I can sew too.”
“S-Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that...” Zen hurriedly apologized, realizing he’d somehow hurt her pride. It was really hard to deal with the feelings of a young lady who was at such a sensitive age!
As she looked like she was totally pouting, Elysia said, “I think I’m just different from you. I’m not someone who can’t do the household chores no matter how much time passes.”
She’d once again hit him where it hurt, and Zen practically screamed his apology. “I’m really sorry for being a workaholic!”
I think it’s amazing she’s working hard, and it’s admirable. But she’s the imperial princess, so I really don’t think she has to learn how to sew... he caught himself thinking, but would it be too thoughtless to point that out? Would she pout again? What Elysia needed was a top-class education and to broaden her insights for her future when she’d be crowned empress.
Indeed, if she rightfully ascended to the throne, she’d be in a position where she didn’t even need to marry into a family. It would’ve been different if she’d been lower in the ranks of succession. These days, in the western region of the continent, which was considered the cultural sphere, girls who were good at embroidery were really popular. That meant whether one was a commoner or an upper-class woman, they were probably expected to learn how to sew to prepare for a future marriage of convenience.
However, that didn’t apply to Elysia. If she was going to work hard at something, then frankly, Zen would like for her to learn a thing or two about political economy or geography or history. Truthfully, she did occasionally pester him for lectures on various topics, but they could afford to do it two or three times as often.
Elysia isn’t necessarily ignoring her duties as an imperial princess, but...it feels like she really prefers focusing on becoming a domestically skilled young lady rather than caring about what’s actually necessary.
Then, wasn’t it a father’s duty to support that? Maybe so. She was still a fourteen-year-old girl. It wasn’t like she had come into this world wanting to be an imperial princess. And she’d only ended up having to live in this remote region after her life had been threatened by the current emperor, her uncle. It shouldn’t be a crime for her to be carefree and do what she wanted for this short period of time.
Zen himself had been born to a notable family of bureaucrats, and he’d spent every day of his life studying to become a great civil official and military officer for as long as he could remember. It’d be a lie to say it hadn’t been painful.
The reason he’d been able to have a decent adolescence was that he’d happened to be blessed with the right human relationships. It was because during that hellish Advanced Civil Service Exam, he’d met his first love, Aness, and his one-of-a-kind best friend, Heinri. Elysia was the child they’d left behind after their deaths. Although she wasn’t his real daughter, he loved her dearly.
I wish for Elysia’s happiness from the bottom of my heart, he thought to himself. But what on earth should he do to achieve that? It was so difficult to raise a child. It really made him rack his brain. Not to mention he was just plain inexperienced.
It might’ve been different if I’d already been married with kids. At times like this, he really felt how he still had a long way to go.
It’d already been fourteen years since he’d sunk himself fully into the world of government officials. He’d managed to pass the Advanced Civil Service Exam, but for him, it had only led to a stressful and busy life with no hopes of a promotion. He’d barely had the free time to breathe, let alone get lost in love, and marriage had been a dream within a dream. Yet somehow, all three of his older siblings had created families while they were in their twenties!
That’s right. Even his older brother Yohia, who was even more of a workaholic than Zen, had immediately settled down with a good woman their father had introduced to him through an arranged marriage meeting. Their parents had always pestered his older siblings, insisting they hurry up and get married. Meanwhile, they’d never brought Zen any prospective spouses.
“You can just move along at your own pace, Zen.”
“It’s just as your father says. Even if you don’t rush, I’m sure you’ll find a good woman one day.”
They always reassured him, looking at him kindly. Of course, he knew this kindness was a mere sliver away from pity.
I’m someone who hasn’t been able to get a promotion at all despite being born into the Leadon family. There’s no way anyone would be interested in marrying me! Well, this is much better than being forced into arranged marriage meetings that I don’t want, though. However, he had to admit it made him feel a bit frustrated. Also, his married coworkers in the central government agencies had acted like they were better than him.
Everyone would grumble about how “marriage is the end of your life” while actually carrying around an air of both superiority and joy. Zen had heard his coworkers boast endlessly about their love lives through the guise of idle complaints.
Even so, it’s not like I have anyone I’m interested in, so it’d be silly to get married now just for the sake of it.
Just like his parents had said, there was no need for him to rush. More importantly, he had to devote himself to carefully raising his daughter as a single father. At the very least, knowing how inexperienced he was, he had to do it with everything he had.
✦ ✦ ✦
“When I was in the inner palace, I heard the court ladies gossip many times that girls who are good at embroidery are popular. Do you think that’s Sir Zen’s type?” Elysia grumbled as she swept the living room.
It was after they’d finished breakfast and sent Zen off to the town hall. She was complaining to the large white wolf, Keel, who was curled up in front of the fireplace. However, he hadn’t acknowledged anything she said at all.
“Are you listening, Keel?” asked Elysia indignantly.
Keel, whose favorite pastime was sleeping, let out a big yawn with his large jaws. “I apologize. I’m just so tired.”
Although they were in the southern part of the empire, which had a warm climate, they were still just over halfway through February. Keel spent a majority of the day in front of the fireplace dozing.