“So yeah, I’m gonna get revenge!” Tanya declared (once she’d stopped crying).
“Revenge, you say?” asked Laplace.
“Yeah. I’m gonna make those assholes wish they were dead,” Tanya growled, biting her lip and making it bleed. Ah, the sweet, coppery taste of retribution. “Anyway, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Tanya Artemiciov—and I want you, oh mighty Sorceress, to help me get back at them!”
“It’s lovely to meet you, Tanya. And seeing as you beat me fair and square, I’m happy to help you... but how?”
“I wanna beat them at their own game. See, the nationwide Adventurers’ Sparring Tournament is coming up, so I want to enter the tourney and trounce my old party! Beat them into paste and make it look like an accident!”
“And where do I come in...?”
“I want you to form a party with me. That way we can enter as a team.”
Instantly Laplace started to laugh, and it was no mystery why: “Form a party? Why, that’s precisely what I was going to ask of you if I’d won!”
“No, this is different. We’re not teaming up for fun. We’re doing it for revenge!” Just then, the earth began to rumble beneath her feet. “What the...? What’s going on?!”
“Oh boy, here he comes... That’s his roar,” Laplace sighed.
“Roar?! Whose roar?!”
“Well, you see, after I was sealed away, your beloved Maxwell let a certain something loose in these parts so people would stay away.”
“Wait... You don’t mean...”
“Oh, I’m afraid so,” Laplace replied, floating up into the air. “You’re an adventurer, are you not? Surely you’ve heard of the King of the Western Wasteland?”
On the horizon, that certain something flapped its wings, its roar sending a shockwave through the air.
“Anyway, as I was saying, it’s a Wyvern,” Laplace continued.
At this, Tanya looked past Laplace at the intruder... and promptly lost all hope. She was right, it was a Wyvern—an angry one, at that—flying at breakneck speed right towards them. Gimme a frickin’ break!
Wyverns were a rare and dangerous breed of dragon, but on the average day Tanya could take one down with little difficulty. One small problem, however: she had only just recently passed out from mana deficiency. There was no chance she could cast anything halfway decent in her current state. And as for the Great Sorceress?
“Hahaha! That Wyvern is simply furious! Maybe you hit it with one of your Explosions! Hahahaha!”
“Not funny, Laplace! What are we going to do?!”
“What do you mean? Just defeat it.”
“I can’t! Like, seriously, I really can’t! I don’t have any mana left! Why don’t you defeat it, huh?! You’re the Great Sorceress! I bet you could wipe the floor with that thing!”
“No, I’m afraid that would be impossible.”
“What?”
“I think it might be an after-effect from the seal, but, um... I can’t use any of my attack spells.”
“WHAT?!”
All this time, you weren’t simply choosing not to attack—you literally COULDN’T ATTACK?! When were you planning to drop THAT little bombshell on me?! Oh god, the Wyvern’s almost on top of us... Damn it, Laplace! You really are nothing more than a stupid, human-shaped balloon!
“That look on your face says you think I’m nothing more than a human-shaped balloon.”
“Damn right!”
“Wow... I wish you would’ve at least tried to deny it... Well, anyway. After watching you in action, I’m pretty sure you’re the one who ought to ‘wipe the floor with that thing,’ as it were. And I know exactly what you need.”
“Huh? Where are you going with this?”
“Have you given any thought to changing classes?”
“...What?”
Above them, the Wyvern let out an ear-splitting roar.
Do we really have time for this, Laplace? Because I feel like there are more pressing issues at hand here!
“Change classes to what?”
“In my esteemed opinion as a Sorceress, with your exceptional ability and track record as a Mage, I believe there’s a class that would suit you even better.”
“Okay, well, now’s really not the time for...”
“You should be a Magi-Knight.”
“...Huh?”
“Are you listening? A Magi-Knight! Why limit yourself to mere spellcasting when you’ve got the confidence and tactical know-how to throw around Arcane-level spells without batting a lash? It’s a waste of your talents!” She extended a hand and cupped her pale fingers around Tanya’s cheek.
Tanya froze, rooted to the spot. “Wha... Huh...?” Her... Her lips... She’s leaning in...!
“Tanya Artemiciov! Right this moment, I command you to change classes to a Magi-Knight—the ultimate master-level class that can wield both physical and magical attacks! After all, if I’m a Sorceress, then we don’t need another pure caster! And besides... I think you’ll do well.”
“Uh, Laplace? Y-You’re in my bubble! Aah...!”
She thinks I’d be good as a Magi-Knight? The ultimate master-level class?!
Laplace’s lips pressed against hers, smothering her confusion—and a warm, fuzzy feeling washed over Tanya as Laplace’s mana transferred into her. Something inside Tanya felt restless, almost as though a tiny dragon had awoken deep within her. Her mind went blank—this was something she’d never felt before.
“Aah... mmph!”
Coming up for air, the Great Sorceress whispered, “I am the Great and Ancient Laplace. I may not be able to cast any offensive spells, but I can still make miracles happen.”
“Wh... Mmmm?!”
When they pulled apart at last, Tanya gasped for breath. For an ancient Sorceress, Laplace smelled really good... and her lips were pillowy soft.
“Now then... Despite your astounding raw power, somehow your mana circuits were all over the place, so I’ve taken the liberty of streamlining them for you! Now draw your sword, Magi-Knight!” Laplace placed one hand to the ground, and instantly the earth began to soundlessly split apart. “I summon thee... awesome sword, or whatever!”
“Wow, your incantation sucks! One would think you’d be better at it, considering you can cast without a staff or magic circle!”
And yet the rift in the earth began to glow nonetheless. Lo and behold, there sprouted a massive sword, its length greater than Tanya’s own height.
“What is that?!”
“I’ve duplicated that one ‘Excalibur’ sword for you. Quite the classy gift, yes?”
“You what?!” Are you nuts?! That’s a national treasure! And for that matter— “This Excalibur knockoff is bigger than I am! How the heck am I supposed to wield it?!”
“Wait, what? The bigger the sword, the stronger the blow, right?”
“What are you, twelve?! That’s not how this works, you idiot!” And you’re telling me SHE’S the Great Sorceress?!
The Wyvern let out another roar and flapped its wings, drawing ever closer to its prey. Perhaps hunger had made it impatient.
“Uh-oh... It’s headed this way... Guess you’d better grab that sword and go defeat it!”
“You’re out of your mind if you think I can even lift this massive—”
Yoink.
For some reason, the Not-Excalibur was much lighter than Tanya had anticipated—to an impossible degree.
“What the...? It’s barely heavier than a staff!”
“During the kiss, I scanned your mana circuit patterns. Then, when I created the sword, I optimized it to match. That way you can always wield it! In a sense, it’s both a sword and a staff—the ultimate weapon! So, what do you think? Yet another genius creation from Laplace the Great and Beautiful Sorceress, wouldn’t you say?”
“Why would I say it when you already have...?”
The Not-Excalibur in her hand—mana flowing through her veins—feet firmly planted on the ground—the Wyvern nearly upon them—
“Rrgh... There’s no time for wise-cracking! I’ll just have to wing it... Well, here goes nothing!”
Shaking the doubt and hesitation (and the memory of that sweet kiss) from her mind, Tanya took off running—
“Whoa, what the...?!”
Her whole body felt so light.
And in that instant, Tanya knew she could win.
When she focused her energy on her sword, she could practically feel her mana increase... and somehow she instinctively knew what to do next.
Wind Magic, engage!
With that thought, magic runes began to glow over the surface of the Not-Excalibur, and it promptly cast a spell to enhance Wit, the Wind Magic stat. No complicated incantation, no charge time.
“Holy crap! This sword is amazing!”
Mana flowed through her entire body. Wind Magic gathered at her feet. And then she ran, ran, ran at the speed of light, as though her body had become one with the wind itself. Already she was performing far beyond the level one would expect of someone who had only just become a Magi-Knight three minutes ago. Her heart hammered in her chest.