“Mulaso, are you crying?” asks the sergeant. Chowing down on my pork that still remains on the bone, I nod vigorously. I mean, it’s just so good! And so sad.
This meat came from a pig that was left behind after its village had been massacred. Who raised this beast so well? Whoever they were, they’re dead now, and I’m eating the fruits of their labor with tears streaming down my face because it’s so delicious. The sergeant pauses.
“Well, eat up, man. Our job is to get down in the mud. If you don’t eat, you won’t last long. Plus, you’ll piss off the guys already in their graves.”
I nod. I nod and bite into the meat. It’s so good.
There are other delicious things around the campfire as well: fresh vegetables, stews, and even wine. Tonight, we’re going to eat and drink to our heart’s content and restore our energy. Then, we’ll offer our prayers to the many, many graves we built and bring what food we can to the refugees. They must be starving.
“Lady Kuroi’s left us...” I nod at the sergeant. Indeed, Lady Kuroi went back already. After eliminating the vampires that had been terrorizing the western front, she immediately headed off to the next battlefield: the north. No rest at all. “She’s amazing. She swept through those freakish monsters like they were weeds, and yet, she always looks calm and indescribably beautiful. She’s definitely loved.”
I don’t even need to ask “by whom?” By God, of course. The human God. Lady Kuroi’s existence means that God must exist.
“And those knights weren’t normal, either. So fast and strong...” he continues. “They knew no fear. Of course, House Willow is known for having dauntless courage, but those stories about them pit them against small monsters and bandits. To see them rip through real monsters...”
That knight called himself Agias Willow, I think. We were all tied up when he saved us with his shining sword. He turned us from vampire food back into humans.
We can’t fight like that; we aren’t cool like them. It’s not about being able to ride a horse, or about lack of swordsmanship... it’s courage. We lack the courage to fight.
“Hey, wipe that sad look off your face! Not everyone’s cut out to be a hero. In fact, you impressed me. I can understand your admiration, but frustration? That’s something else entirely.” The sergeant peers at my face, so I turn towards the campfire. The popping flames are strong and warm, dancing beautifully; they remind me of Lady Kuroi and her knights. It’s marvelous to see how they don’t succumb to the darkness of the night. If only I could be like that... I don’t want to be a mere observer.
“Let’s just focus on doing what we can to the best of our abilities. Isn’t that good enough?”
His voice sounds like it’s rising from the bottom of his stomach. Maybe that’s why it sticks in the bottom of mine. He’s right next to me, yet sounds so far away. He must be watching the fire, too.
“Lady Kuroi has things that only she can accomplish. The knights, too, have things that only they can do. That’s why we should focus on what we can do. We’ll transport all the survivors and supplies we scraped together to the city. People need us,” he declares.
My gaze drops to the pile of firewood beneath the roaring flames. The wood burns, cracks, and turns to ash, which then blows away on the wind. The popping sound is coming from it, not from the flames.
“Yes, we were saved, but it’s nearly impossible to completely save someone. Perhaps, when there are lots of people you want to save, fighting is the easier route, but it’s not like God is going to rain down food from above,” he jokes, so I give a little chuckle. The human god is a god of fire and war, not of meat and wine. If that were the case, would Lady Kuroi have been a chef and not a warrior in a different life? And the knights, would they have been sous chefs and waiters, traveling to villages and delivering gourmet dishes? I bet that would make everyone happy. I could help with washing the dishes and cleaning up afterwards.
That would be nice. Really nice. Fun, even. I wish the world was like that.
“C’mon, finish up and go to sleep, we have an early morning tomorrow. Gotta turn our backs on the scary north and head south to the city at the foot of the mountain.”
I nod and lie down. My belly is full, I’m slightly drunk, and the fire’s close and warm. The sounds of people still eating and drinking are pleasant to my ears. I feel like we can keep working hard together.
God, they say You reside within fire. We’ll do what we can, in our own way. We’ll work hard. So please, grant victory to Lady Kuroi and her knights. Grant Your greatest blessings to the ones who work the hardest. And one day, I hope we can all gather around a great fire together. I bet that would be fun. If that day comes, I’m sure everyone will be able to smile and say: “I’m glad I survived.”