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SEPARATE waiting rooms were prepared for the five finalists.
I changed into my concert dress and had Hanaka put up my hair. My pale complexion reflected in the mirror was a far cry from looking healthy.
“You still have time before you’re up. What would you like to do in the meantime?” Miss Ayumi asked.
I breathed a sigh. “Is it all right if I go outside for some fresh air?”
My performance was the last of the day. Is the first finalist already on stage? I didn’t have it in me to listen to the other finalists. I was scared it’d influence my own performance.
“Sure. Come back in fifteen minutes.”
“Okay.”
“Good luck, Mashiro! I’ll be cheering you on from the audience!”
“Okay. Thanks, Hanaka.”
Pinching the corners of my dress to keep from stepping on the hem, I left the waiting room. I think there’s a rest area in the garden behind the hall. I’ll get some fresh air and refresh my mood there.
Destination in mind, I walked around the hallway corner and bumped into the person I wanted to see the least. Tobi. Kakeru Tominaga was written on the nameplate hanging on the door he had stepped out of.
“Hello, Mashiro. You look quite stunning in today’s dress,” Tobi complimented with a smarmy smile while he assessed me with his eyes.
“Hello. Thank you,” I said briefly, trying to make my way by him. My faint hope that I’d be able to escape him this time was dashed by the hovering presence I felt directly behind me.
Dang it! Why the heck is this guy following me?!
At all costs, I had to avoid accidentally falling right before the biggest performance of my life. If only I was wearing sneakers, I would run away from him at maximum speed! I walked on in silence, internally layering curse after curse on him.
I slipped out the automatic doors connecting to the back garden, where an invigorating breeze tousled my hair. There wasn’t a single cloud in the clear blue sky. The weather is great today.
Taking several deep breaths, I tried my best to shut Tobi out of my thoughts, which soon proved impossible.
“Excuse me…should you really be here right now?” I blurted, my ability to handle his presence past its limits.
He stepped beside me and stared down at my face with phony affection. “We are only minutes away from the critical performance of a lifetime. I can’t leave you all alone at a time like this, Mashiro.”
“Is that so? I would much rather be left alone though.” I walked over to the bench, mulling over how I could get rid of him.
“Wait. Your dress will be sullied if you just sit down.” Tobi pulled a large white handkerchief from his suit pocket and spread it over the wooden bench. He looked like such a perfect gentlemen with those smooth gestures of his.
Dang it! He got me. Now I have to sit next to him.
“Thank you,” I reluctantly said, perching on the edge of the bench. Tobi sat down beside me.
“How are you faring today?”
“…Not very good,” I admitted, since it wasn’t like I could hide it.
Tobi’s eyes bulged as if he couldn’t believe his ears. “Mashiro, are you an idiot?”
“Excuse me?”
He’s the one who started this fight, but I’ll happily go to war with him.
“See, you always let what you’re thinking show on your face. I’m on the side of your rival today. Do you even understand that?”
Is he trying to compel me to view him as the enemy? Ha! I don’t need you to tell me that now. I’ve viewed you as the enemy for years, pervert!
“I understand. But I won’t lie. I’m not in a good state right now. So I wish you would leave me alone.”
Go away, would ya?! I insisted with my eyes.
Tobi, who was by no means dumb or dense, ignored me. “I was planning on asking you a favor today, but it appears I won’t have to.” A derisive sneer curled the corner of his lips.
“What favor?”
“I want you to let Tominaga win. That’s what I was thinking about asking of you.”
I was too shocked for words. Was he insane?!
I flayed Tobi with my eyes, but he merely shrugged.
“It was merely a thought. Don’t get the wrong idea. Hear me out.”
I sprung to my feet and swiped the handkerchief from the bench. “I will wash and return this to you later. Goodbye.” Glaring at him with every ounce of contempt in my body, I tried to get away by walking past him.
“What if I said I’ll make you a scholarship student at Seio if you help me save face today?” Tobi bluntly offered while crossing his legs in front of me.
The shock was like a punch to the head. Dizzy, I staggered and was held up by his hand of all things. Tobi’s sweet cologne made the bile rise in the back of my throat, and I quickly pressed the handkerchief to my mouth.
“I took the opportunity to investigate your aspirations. Don’t you want to attend Seio? I could easily make your dreams come true. It’s not a bad offer, is it?” Tobi’s voice was sickeningly gentle.
This…this nauseating joke is the competition event I’d been waiting for? Is this the only way for me to achieve my dreams?
“Is it really all that startling? But I guess in your current state, tackling the final is beyond you now. Dropping out before you set foot on stage is another option.” Tobi’s singsong voice sent my thoughts into disarray.
This is so frustrating! Get a hold of yourself, Mashiro! I ordered my trembling legs to move, but they wouldn’t listen to me.
“Let’s take this road together. You have the talent to pull it off.”
“Good luck! I know just how hard you’ve been working at the piano, Mashiro. You’ll do amazing!”
My fingers wouldn’t stop trembling. Everyone has gone above and beyond to encourage me. I don’t have the time to clear out my thoughts. I have to stand on stage in less than half an hour. Can I do it in this state?
What should I do? What can I do?
“So this is where you were, Mashiro. You have to get ready to go on stage soon. Let’s head back in together.”
It was Kon who saved me from the brink of breaking down. From beginning to end, she was always my guardian angel.
Seeing Kon show up behind the concert hall brought me so much relief my knees nearly buckled. She walked swiftly over and rescued me from Tobi’s hands.
“It’s okay. Hold on to me.” Kon wrapped her arms around me when all I could do was nod, and guided me towards the automatic doors.
Not once did she acknowledge Tobi.
I should’ve treated Tobi like that too, I absently thought.
Kon handed me a chilled bottle of mineral water back at the waiting room. I took a sip and washed away the bitter taste permeating my mouth. I was informed that Miss Ayumi had already moved to her seat in the audience.
Kou and Midori were waiting for my return in the waiting room, and they gasped when they saw my face.
“What the—”
“Mashiro?!”
A knock on the door stopped them from saying more as the competition coordinator popped her head into the waiting room. “Miss Shimao, please head over to the stage wing now.”
“…Okay.” It took me until that moment to realize that I had been clutching Tobi’s handkerchief.
Disgusting! I threw it reflexively on the floor. Kou’s whole countenance changed when he caught sight of Tobi’s initials embroidered in the handkerchief’s right corner.
He grimly picked up the handkerchief, confirmed the initials, and swore, “Damn it.”
“Use this, Mashiro.” Midori handed me her handkerchief. I accepted it from her with a shaking hand. She pressed her soft hands around my right hand. “I know Sou is cheering you on right now. He was super ecstatic about watching it live online.”
“You’re amazing, Mashiro!” The image of a younger Sou squinting at me like I was the most dazzling light in his world crossed my mind.
Ahh, he’s the one person I don’t want to see me like this.
“I’ve got to go.” I paused at the door and looked over my shoulder at my three friends.
I’m so ashamed. Tears are blurring my vision.
Kon was practically staring a hole through me as she clenched her teeth. Kou was scowling with an expression that captured a mix of emotions: worry, regret, and intense anger.
It’s my first time seeing him make that face. My first time seeing Kou without any composure. I couldn’t help myself from letting out a small giggle.
The second I laughed, the memory of that day I longed for, to play music side by side with Kou, Sou, and Kon, came rushing back to me in full color.
That’s right. That was my true dream. Not winning this competition or enrolling in Seio.
I’ll muster everything I have and climb to new heights with my own ability.
My hands had stopped shaking.